Send to school or not???

Angela - posted on 08/03/2009

As for the eating disorder, because you know what he likes you can fix his lunch so there is no problem at school. If does well with other kids socially, then can still possibly go to school. With the behavior problem is really a judgment call on you. Some children tend to do well with school structure because they have that daily routine whereas others do not. But I would speak with a teacher at a school of your choice to ask questions as to how they would handle situations in relation to your child and let that be you determining factor.

Jodi - posted on 08/03/2009

My daughter's pre-school actually assesses children for their readiness for school and helps uncertain parents make the decision. In fact, earlier this year, they advised one lot of parents that their daughter (who was on tail end of the intake age) that she would not be ready for school, and a friend of mine has been advised that her son may need another year of pre-school. These assessments were not based on academic intelligence, as they were both capable academically to start school next year, but it was based on their social and emotional maturity. A child can be very smart, but still not have the indpendence or the emotional maturity to cope with school.

Both of my sister-in-laws have helt their son's back to start school the year they turn 6 rather than when they turn 5, and it was a good decision for their boys. We kept my step-son back too, because he was just very emotionally immature, and it was a good decision, as he is doing well at school (he is now 10), and was more emotionally ready when he started. My daughter, on the other hand, will be starting just before she turns 5 because she is emotionally ready for it, in addition to the academics, and I think it would be a disadvantage to hold her back.

Heather, I know you are a teacher, but I don't agree with you. I think, if they are NOT ready for school, and you have to keep them back after they start school, this would have a greater impact on their social skills and self-esteem (especially as they get older), whereas an additional year in pre-school can eliminate the risk of this.

Each child is different, and I have found with each of my kids that you go with your gut. You know if your child is ready. If he is in pre-school, have a talk to the pre-school teachers and see what they have to say. If he is not in pre-school, maybe he needs pre-school to help him with developing his emotional maturity, and this is what you should do this year.

You didn't mention your son's age, but if he is one of the younger ones, I can't see any disadvantage in keeping him back if you feel he is not ready. Unless, of course, it is you that is not ready? There is always a danger that it is the parent who is not ready and not the child.

Nina - posted on 08/03/2009

Three houses (or so) down from you lives Douglas Knepp. He is a Kindergarten teacher at Bridgway Island. Talk to him. Maybe he can be helpful! He is such a nice guy. Kayla had him two year ago and I love him.... Tough one... Only you really know what is right for him.

Dawn - posted on 08/03/2009

my son is 5 and isn't ready to start. His school has a Pre-Kindergarden program for kids like him. Also, my teacher friends all say most boys are not ready to start school till they are 6yrs, girls are ready at 5 but not the boys. Weird.

Heather - posted on 08/03/2009

I am a teacher and I strongly encourage you to go ahead and send him to school. Boys who are held back end up having much greater social skill problems and issues of low self-esteem. If you have a positive attitude about learning and some confidence in the school, I think you will be pleasantly surprised.

Jean - posted on 08/03/2009

Has he attended a preschool? If so what is their opinion as to whether or not he is ready for Kindergarten placement. I held my son back until he was five and do not regret it. He is now a freshman and places a 99% core total in the nation for basic skills. He was always in talented and gifted programs since First grade. In my opinion boys develop slower than girls so that was the reason I waited until my son was 6. Just be cautious of his social skills and interaction with the other classmates and whether the school system continues to challenge his mind.

Sharon - posted on 08/03/2009

No, keep him home. Arrange more play dates to help him socialise, maybe a day here and there in a preschool? But hold him back. You aren't doing him any favors putting him into a situation he isn't emotionally equipped to handle yet with people not willing to support his special needs.

Sharon - posted on 08/03/2009

No, keep him home. Arrange more play dates to help him socialise, maybe a day here and there in a preschool? But hold him back. You aren't doing him any favors putting him into a situation he isn't emotionally equipped to handle yet with people not willing to support his special needs.

Shelley - posted on 08/03/2009

Do what your "gut" tells you. In my opinion, your gut says keep him home... Have you talked to a Teacher of young children for their opinion?? After you talk to a Teacher, sit down & write all the pros & cons for each option. Hope that helps. No one can say for sure & Mom always knows best.