Should children witness birth?

Catherine - posted on 07/11/2009

I guess it would depend on how old the child is.

I had C Sections for both of my children but when I was pregnant with my 2nd child my son was involved with everything dr.'s appoitnments, ultrasounds but when it came down to the decision I would have not let him witness the birth if I would have gone natural because he was to young.

Minnie - posted on 07/11/2009

Quoting Jocelyn:

Quoting Kate:

Quoting Lisa:

In traditional societies little girls grow up being a part of pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding, and childcare. It's nothing new, strange, or scary to them when they themselves become mothers and give birth.

In our culture childbirth is something that is feared because it is hidden. If daughters were allowed to see their mothers, aunts, sisters, cousins, and eventually friends, give birth, then maybe here too people will see it as a normal process that goes unhindered 95% of the time. And they wouldn't be fearful of that process.

So yes, I think that children (namely girls) should see childbirth. Throughout the milennia women have been surrounded by close female relatives and friends as they bring their infants into this world- as it should be. Not hidden as something mysterious, scary, and vulgar.

Childbirth is only scary if we make it out to be that way.

I couldn't agree more! I actually plan on inviting several people to my birth and not just family. I find the whole process fascinating and exhilirating and I want to share it with everyone. If my daughter wants to watch she's more than welcome to. :)

I agree with you both :)

i'm due in oct and will be having a water birth, so many ppl are invited.  tho i'm not sure ifi am going to have my son there or not (for the whole time anyway)...he will be 33 months, and he is very "into" everything, so i think he might get underfoot trying to help with everything.  we'll see how he's acting in a few months,  i think it mostly depends on the child.

There's a home/natural/waterbirth video out there on youtube by a la leche league forums user....she had lots of close friends there for her birth, and her son...and he was so perfectly at ease with the whole thing.  There was a toddler there as well, and the mother of the toddler just sat and nursed a while to contain him.

Jocelyn - posted on 07/11/2009

Quoting Kate:

Quoting Lisa:

In traditional societies little girls grow up being a part of pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding, and childcare. It's nothing new, strange, or scary to them when they themselves become mothers and give birth.

In our culture childbirth is something that is feared because it is hidden. If daughters were allowed to see their mothers, aunts, sisters, cousins, and eventually friends, give birth, then maybe here too people will see it as a normal process that goes unhindered 95% of the time. And they wouldn't be fearful of that process.

So yes, I think that children (namely girls) should see childbirth. Throughout the milennia women have been surrounded by close female relatives and friends as they bring their infants into this world- as it should be. Not hidden as something mysterious, scary, and vulgar.

Childbirth is only scary if we make it out to be that way.

I couldn't agree more! I actually plan on inviting several people to my birth and not just family. I find the whole process fascinating and exhilirating and I want to share it with everyone. If my daughter wants to watch she's more than welcome to. :)

I agree with you both :)

i'm due in oct and will be having a water birth, so many ppl are invited.  tho i'm not sure ifi am going to have my son there or not (for the whole time anyway)...he will be 33 months, and he is very "into" everything, so i think he might get underfoot trying to help with everything.  we'll see how he's acting in a few months,  i think it mostly depends on the child.

Kate CP - posted on 07/11/2009

Quoting Lisa:

In traditional societies little girls grow up being a part of pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding, and childcare. It's nothing new, strange, or scary to them when they themselves become mothers and give birth.

In our culture childbirth is something that is feared because it is hidden. If daughters were allowed to see their mothers, aunts, sisters, cousins, and eventually friends, give birth, then maybe here too people will see it as a normal process that goes unhindered 95% of the time. And they wouldn't be fearful of that process.

So yes, I think that children (namely girls) should see childbirth. Throughout the milennia women have been surrounded by close female relatives and friends as they bring their infants into this world- as it should be. Not hidden as something mysterious, scary, and vulgar.

Childbirth is only scary if we make it out to be that way.

I couldn't agree more! I actually plan on inviting several people to my birth and not just family. I find the whole process fascinating and exhilirating and I want to share it with everyone. If my daughter wants to watch she's more than welcome to. :)

Kate CP - posted on 07/11/2009

Quoting Lisa:

In traditional societies little girls grow up being a part of pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding, and childcare. It's nothing new, strange, or scary to them when they themselves become mothers and give birth.

In our culture childbirth is something that is feared because it is hidden. If daughters were allowed to see their mothers, aunts, sisters, cousins, and eventually friends, give birth, then maybe here too people will see it as a normal process that goes unhindered 95% of the time. And they wouldn't be fearful of that process.

So yes, I think that children (namely girls) should see childbirth. Throughout the milennia women have been surrounded by close female relatives and friends as they bring their infants into this world- as it should be. Not hidden as something mysterious, scary, and vulgar.

Childbirth is only scary if we make it out to be that way.

I couldn't agree more! I actually plan on inviting several people to my birth and not just family. I find the whole process fascinating and exhilirating and I want to share it with everyone. If my daughter wants to watch she's more than welcome to. :)

Minnie - posted on 07/11/2009

In traditional societies little girls grow up being a part of pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding, and childcare. It's nothing new, strange, or scary to them when they themselves become mothers and give birth.

In our culture childbirth is something that is feared because it is hidden. If daughters were allowed to see their mothers, aunts, sisters, cousins, and eventually friends, give birth, then maybe here too people will see it as a normal process that goes unhindered 95% of the time. And they wouldn't be fearful of that process.

So yes, I think that children (namely girls) should see childbirth. Throughout the milennia women have been surrounded by close female relatives and friends as they bring their infants into this world- as it should be. Not hidden as something mysterious, scary, and vulgar.

Childbirth is only scary if we make it out to be that way.

Leigh - posted on 07/11/2009

My son was 5 when he watched his brother being born. We did not just bring him into the birth, we prepared him for what would happen. He had his own support person in the room with him (my sister). We watched birthing video's with him & explained what was happening, & that the same thing would happen with Mummy when his brother was being born. We explained all the different stages of birth. I had my birth in a 'birthing centre', not a hospital, it's set up like a home, just with a few 'medical things' around. I remember clearly my son saying to my sister just before his brother was born, Mum's body is doing alot of work isn't it, & when I was in obvious pain he said, Mums hurting, but the baby will be here soon wont it, & my sister was there to reassure him throughout the process. When his brother was born, the midwife asked who would like the first hold of the baby & my son said, I'm holding my brother first, because I have alot of things I would like to tell him. The next day when he went back to school, his teacher said he told the class, I watched my brother being born yesterday, & it's not like on TV they come out looking a funny colour, & then they change to a baby colour. So, I think it's up to the individual on what life experience's you want your children to witness. BTW, he's now 18 & his brother is 13 & he can't even remember being there lol!!

Sabrina - posted on 07/11/2009

I think it depends on the child and how well the mother handles the birth process too. I kknow when my cousin was little they wanted her in there but she got too scared because mommy was yelling in pain. So me and my aunt took her to the play room. But yes having a back up plan is a good idea. Acouple of my kids have watched a Baby Story on TLC and are not affected by it. But it could be different if it was mommy and not just a stranger. But I personally think that is too much for my kids to see. I really dont want my kids seeing me in that kind of position.

Kate CP - posted on 07/11/2009

If they want to, sure. I wouldn't FORCE anybody to watch a birth if they didn't want to. I agree with Jenny: as long as it's a normal delivery (ie not cutting Mommy open) then yea, it's cool. :)

*Fluffy Bunnies - posted on 07/11/2009

I don't think I would do it. I know I would not want to see my mom in as much pain as I was in. It was hard enough on my husband.

Tammy - posted on 07/11/2009

I would never ever do this nor would I recommend anyone else do it. I think it's FAR too traumatic for a child to see his/her mum go through and too intimate an occasion for an older child to be a part of. You never know if there will be complications or if something shocking will happen. I did not do it. My opinion.

Libby - posted on 07/11/2009

My boys are 7 & 5 and they both want to watch their sister be born in Oct. We will probably let them as long as there are no problems.

Kate - posted on 07/11/2009

If they are comfortable and want to, yes, they should. Regardless of age. A lot of people whose children witnessed the birth of their siblings say that they are closer when they are older, they feel a stronger bond. My DD will be just shy of 18 mo. when I deliver my second (due in 2 weeks!) and she will be allowed in when/if she wants to. I personally could not stand to know she was upset somewhere else in the house or outside because she wanted to be with me and could not.

Jennifer - posted on 07/11/2009

I am pregnant with my second and don't think I will let my daughter in the room as she will only be 11or 11 1/2 months old and will have no idea what is going on and would probably be scared and/or "in the way" but kids that are old enough to understand, if they show interest I would explain to them in as much detail as possible what is going to happen and then let them decide....I don't think forcing them if they have no idea what to expect is a good idea as it could be frightening or confusing and you will be a tad too busy to reassure them that everything is ok, etc. also if they say they want to and then decide halfway through labor they don't want to be there make sure someone is there who can take them out.

Samantha - posted on 07/11/2009

i agree with heather with age and stuff and it should only be if the kid wants to

Heather - posted on 07/11/2009

I would go by a kid by kid basis for some it would be fine for others it could really frighten them seeing mom in pain. I also think the age of the child and the time of the delivery would also play a part in a decision. But if someone does have the child there I think it would be good to have someone else available to take the child home if the child cant handle it or wants to leave

Jenny - posted on 07/11/2009

I don't see why not as long as there are no complications they do not need to witness. It is a natural and educational process.