spanking your children

Stevie - posted on 11/22/2011 ( 51 moms have responded )

13

39

0

Oh my gracious! Spanking a child and beating them are 2 different things entirely! I am 26, my parents spanked me and I am a intelligent, happily married woman! And yes, I spank my children when it is necessary, just because you don"t believe in it don't knock the parents that do! Everyones opinions and ideas for raising their children are sdifferent! That's the great thing about having your own kids "you" get to chose what is right for your individual child! Society has fed you all this garbage that one tap on the butt with your hand is beating your child!? N it is correcting them, teaching them to be civilized and to contribute to society! Most kids I know who were NOT spanked turned out to be worthless human beings!

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Tamara - posted on 11/22/2011

10,839

65

428

Well it is wonderful to know that I am not civilized Nor not able to contribute to society. I suppose I am just a bump on a log or a bowl of mac and cheese. And completely worthless.

Lets See I OWN two successful businesses, raising 4 children one who is off to BYU in the fall, one is headed to the Army. Both have a GPA of 3.5 Lets see the oldest is an Eagle scout the other is Life rank. Both active in sports do tons of community service.

My oldest collects blankets every year for the homeless, and my youngest son started (9started at the age of 7 his idea I just helped) collecting clothes for the homeless he did the research with the different places to make sure the clothes go to the homeless kids not the thrift stores.

And the youngest (7 and 9) are already doing community service in scouts getting good grades, know how to treat people with respect. active in various service community programs.

So I guess If I am not a civilized human and don't know how to contribute to society and nothing more then a worthless human. well I would really like to see someone who isnt :)

Jodi - posted on 11/22/2011

25,219

36

3781

Interesting. I don't spank my kids and somehow I am STILL correcting them and teaching them "to be civilized and to contribute to society". And I'm pretty sure they aren't "worthless human beings", but thank you for your sentiment about the ultimate potential of my children and those of others who are choosing to discipline differently to you. I'm sure others will be as appreciative as I am to have that pointed out to them.

[deleted account]

I'm not completely anti-spanking, but I have to say that the assumption that no spanking equals no discipline is annoying and absurd. Yes, I do spank on rare occasion, but I discipline (teach) my children every day.

My belief is that each family has to do what is right for THEM as long as the child isn't neglected or abused, but that's where it gets 'tricky' cuz to some people a simple swat on the butt IS abuse. I don't, personally, agree w/ that, but who am I to tell them that their way is wrong for them and their kids. Can't spank forever anyway, so there are a LOT of other techniques that better be at use. So why can't someone just use those techniques and NOT spank? Simple... they can.

And I can't believe I caved and responded to this post... lol

Stevie - posted on 11/22/2011

13

39

0

I am talking about "MY" personal experiences with people "I" know and have met! Like "I" said its opinion and "YOUR" choice with "YOUR" kids! "I" NEVER said all kids who are not spanked don't behave! So please sont put words in my mouth! It is great your kids do community service, and you own businesses, some children just learn "NO" other way! My oldest son I talk to, put in time out, and then I spank him as a last resort, I just hate it when people refer to spanking your child as beating them! They are two COMPLETELY different things!

Nikki - posted on 11/22/2011

5,263

41

554

Hitting is smacking, spanking is smacking, different words, same meanings.

This conversation has been closed to further comments

51 Comments

View replies by

Janine - posted on 11/22/2011

16

89

0

hi kathryn i fully agree with you nobody else can smack my kid or anybody elses kid they got no right to do that

Janine - posted on 11/22/2011

16

89

0

thx shannin if i must see a kid been beaten that the marks are lying across him or her body i will report it because a kid did not ask to be treated like that im all for the non spanking but kids will be kids and they will learn 1 day that the spank was good for them at the time

Kathryn - posted on 11/22/2011

5

25

0

I totally agree.. spanking and beating are 2 different things...but i also believe that YOU as the PARENT are the ONLY ones to spank your child. no one else has that right... My step mother in law trys to ''repremand'' my 2 year old when im right in the room with them, i also believe thats wrong, If the parent is right there, no one has the right to do ''repremand'' or spank a child, not even a grandparent, less of course the child is in REAL danger..

Christy - posted on 11/22/2011

2,218

41

400

@ Marina , have you ever seen the Mad TV guy (from about 10 yrs ago) skit, he comes out shirtless and starts every sentence with "YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE?" LMAO. :)

Janine - posted on 11/22/2011

16

89

0

I MYSELF WILL NEVER HIT MY KID BUT IF SHE IS NAUGHTY I WILL GIVE HER A LIGHT SMACK ON THE BOTTOM WITH MY HANDTHATS IT OVER AND DONE BECAUSE THERE IS NO NEED FOR BEATINGS AROUND ME I WITNESSED IT AROUND THE AREA THAT I AM

Janine - posted on 11/22/2011

16

89

0

no that is not what im saying we should know that beating a child that the marks lay is not on a smack on the bottom or hand will not leave marks if you using your hand its when people take out belts to thrash their kids im all against that

Janine - posted on 11/22/2011

16

89

0

hi stevie you are absolutely right there spanking and beating is totally different if you dont spank ur kid when he or she does something wrong they think they can get away with blue murder u can spank their bottom or their hand but beating them till the marks lay on their bodies is a no no

Melissa - posted on 11/22/2011

42

4

1

I am not going to give my opinion on spanking because no one will change my mind on how I discipline my children (as individuals, btw). But some of you ladies need to drop the sarcasm. It makes you seem just as judgemental and immature as you view the OP. I'm just sayin

Molly - posted on 11/22/2011

4

24

0

Hitting children role models bullying! It is a short-cut method of discipline and runs the risk of damaging the child's ability to learn. It communicates the wrong message: "You are bad." It is humiliating and abusive. And worst of all, it teaches that violence is acceptable.

Krista - posted on 11/22/2011

12,562

16

842

That's the great thing about having your own kids "you" get to chose what is right for your individual child!



Oh lordy, this again? Are we seriously going down the "mother always knows best" road?



If every parent chose what was right for their individual child, there would be no need for Child Protective Services.



But there can be a gap the size of a football field between what the parent thinks is right, and what actually IS right.



And unfortunately, a lot of spanking parents aren't all that great at controlling themselves, and either start spanking for every little reason, or start spanking harder and harder.

Christy - posted on 11/22/2011

2,218

41

400

I just spanked both my kids for trying to eat my popcorn while reading all the comments to this thread........

[deleted account]

Its against a childs basic human rights to be physically assaulted by any member of society including their parents. Its ILLEGAL in 29 countries for a reason.

Stifler's - posted on 11/22/2011

15,141

154

597

I was spanked as a kid and i had the same views before I had kids/when my kid was a baby. "just spank them when they do wrong". Since I have been on CoM i have changed my mind and even my parents have change their mind (I have a brother 13 years younger) on physical punishment. It's a very illogical way to discipline your kids.

Tamara - posted on 11/22/2011

10,839

65

428

IMHO Spanking of any kind is abuse. Many ask why because it installs fear in a child. And to me that is abuse.

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 11/22/2011

4,455

6

379

I agree christy..I already grabbed mine ;-)

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 11/22/2011

4,455

6

379

oh and if we lived in a perfect world..we could go around hitting people that pissed us off..lol (but only hitting and spanking...nothing else_

Christy - posted on 11/22/2011

2,218

41

400

Man, I don't have enough popcorn for this thread......hang on, let me go get some more.....

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 11/22/2011

4,455

6

379

I think its porper to tear into that ass when they step out of line! some need it WAY more then others!!
(insert sarcasm)

~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/22/2011

18,423

9

2863

Oh, and yes there is a difference between beating a child and spanking a child (depends on perception) BUT in the childs eyes, either way mommy or daddy is hitting them HARD! They don't care if you leave a mark, just that it hurts.

Stifler's - posted on 11/22/2011

15,141

154

597

We have been through this before. 10000 times. Just because a parent doesn't spank doesn't mean they have no discipline in their home. Spanking is your way of so called "discipline". It's not everyone's.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/22/2011

18,423

9

2863

You know what I hate? I hate it when people start a thread simply to fight just because they are annoyed other people have differing opinions.

You know what else I hate? Blanket statements like "Most kids I know who were NOT spanked turned out to be worthless human beings! "

Oh, another thing I hate? Statements about spanking saying things like spanking "is correcting them, teaching them to be civilized and to contribute to society!"

Really?? REALLY??? Sooo....what you are saying is...now let me be really clear.....if your child hits another kid, or you are teaching them not to hit...you do so by spanking them? I mean, hitting is completely "civilized" so I guess you should be teaching them to hit "properly", so it does not leave a mark...right? I mean, that IS the correct way to spank.

Tamara - posted on 11/22/2011

10,839

65

428

One of the things I have with spanking is you don't/wouldnt walk up to the neighbor lady for letting her dog poo on the side walk and not picking it up and bend her over your knee for breaking a rule/law, you would walk up and remind her of the law. why would you do that with something you were blessed with for a very short time to take care of. IMO they are not Our kids they are on loan from God.

Nikki - posted on 11/22/2011

5,263

41

554

That's something I will never understand why is it ok to hit your children but it's not ok to hit your spouse or another adult. These are kids, we are their role models, how can we say one thing then act in a completely different way. Don't we have a responsibility to teach that violence is never the answer.

Nikki - posted on 11/22/2011

5,263

41

554

Depends if it's in the bedroom or not Johnny! lol, sorry spanking has sexual connotations in Australia lol.

Sharlene - posted on 11/22/2011

3,896

241

746

This is my own prefence,I dont beieve in spanking or smacking ,what ever you want to call it ,But if other parents have to do that then we probably should'nt judge,

Nikki - posted on 11/22/2011

5,263

41

554

Also, I want my daughter to grow up with excellent communication and problem solving skills, not violent and aggressive tenancies. Smacking is not, nor has it ever been a behaviour management technique, discipline is about teaching our children to do the right thing.

Johnny - posted on 11/22/2011

8,686

26

318

I have to leave in 10 minutes to take my daughter to the dentist. But I've got my phone....

Jodi - posted on 11/22/2011

25,219

36

3781

Well, now I have to go to work, and we don't have the internet on there yet since our move. Might pack up my laptop and see if I can get it working today...... :P

Johnny - posted on 11/22/2011

8,686

26

318

So we should just start using physical discipline when people of any age displease us or don't act as we would like? That sounds great.

Jodi - posted on 11/22/2011

25,219

36

3781

Except that if an adult hits an adult, it's called assault. If a kid hits a kid, it's called bullying. If an adult hits a kid, it's called discipline and acceptable???? Makes you think, doesn't it?

Stevie - posted on 11/22/2011

13

39

0

That's funny violent thugs huh, oh and there are some adults who need to be spanked too!

Nikki - posted on 11/22/2011

5,263

41

554

I don't think it should be a parents right or choice, it should be a human right not to be physically punished, as it is for every other adult in our society. But I guess they are kids, they are small and they don't have the same human rights that adults do........ except in some progressive countries where is is illegal.

Stevie - posted on 11/22/2011

13

39

0

OH and Tamara its great your sons joining the Army as well, my hubby is a Marine, so I am alone in my parenting A LOT and my kids have to deal with deployments, all kids are different because everyones lives are different, like I said.

Johnny - posted on 11/22/2011

8,686

26

318

Well all the kids I know who were spanked turned out to be violent thugs who can't control their anger, so there!! ;-P

You've got to love it when people complain about being bashed for their parenting choices and then turn around to criticize someone else's in the very next breath. Now that deserves a spanking. Oh wait, we don't hit adults, just kids. Sorry, I forgot.

Christy - posted on 11/22/2011

2,218

41

400

Uh oh, you are opening a can of worms here. Getting my popcorn ready......

Amy - posted on 11/22/2011

6,257

33

2375

You're right you can spank your child and I can choose not to spank mine, what makes your choice better then mine because you said so? Nobody has fed me anything about spanking I've just found other methods of discipline that work for my family. I was spanked growing up neither was my husband and we are functioning adults that have careers and contribute to society in a positive manner. So using your statement: just because I choose not to spank don't knock me as a parent, because my kids are very respectful and well behaved without hitting or spanking!

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms