stubborn baby

Nidhi - posted on 10/14/2010

thanks everybody

Annabel - posted on 10/13/2010

Firstly I would not say your daughter is stubborn.... She just wants to be independant... Why not try laying different items out on her bed in a morning and try and make a game as well where she can match items for that day.... You could also try sewing little flowers onto a plain skirt for her and show her that they make her look extra pretty in a morning... As with shoes, that can be difficult but try to make it fun again..... Always remember though mom knows best and if she does try to srike you when she can not have her own way just tell her NO but in a calm but firm way and then suggest a piece of fruit if she will try and get dressed with you. Good Luck

Louise - posted on 10/13/2010

If you know you are going to face this problem every morning then make it a game the night before. Lay two of every thing on her bed for her to choose and put the other stuff away. This way you still have some control over what she wears and she has her independance.

Rachel - posted on 10/12/2010

Choose your battles. Let her choose her own shoes, or shirt or whatever, but don't let her hit, or destroy stuff. You decide what's important and what you can let slide.

Also, kids this age need to feel like the have some control over some aspects of their life. It's hard to be told no all the time and to have someone making every decision for you without you knowing what's going to happen next. Before its time to get dressed in the morning lay out all of your expectations for her so she knows what to expect. You can say "We are going to go into your room and pick out your clothes for the day. You can pick out your own shirt and I am going to pick out your pants and shoes. If you can get dressed without crying I will let you pick out your own shirt again tomorrow, but if you cry and throw a fit I won't let you pick out your own shirt tomorrow." Kids have a hard time with transitions also, so this will help her to understand what's about to happen and how she can actively participate.

JuLeah - posted on 10/12/2010

Well, actually, I would stop using negative words to describe your child. We tend to see people by the labels we use. To say she is stubborn implies she is doing this to you, making your life hard cause she wants to ..... maybe her skin is sensitive and the clothes are irritating? Maybe the shoes hurt her feet? Maybe there is something else happening that she can't communicate with you; she lacks the language to tell you what she is thinking or feeling, but that doesn't mean she is refusing to wear the clothes just to make your life harder.
Babies cry when they need/want something. They cry until they have language which works better.
Do you give her a choice with the clothes? Like the blue or the red shirt? Kids like to have choice? Is there a reason she must wear your choice? Pick two things you can live with and let her choose one of the two. I suggest a few parenting classes or books. Is it easier to parent if you know what to expect from your kid at different ages.
Or, you might let the child dress herself? Put her own shoes on?

September - posted on 10/12/2010

Let her pick out and put on her own clothes. Problem solved!

Mylene - posted on 10/12/2010

Let her pick her clothes and listen to her... She is no longer a baby and I believe that children should learn early on to make their own choices. Just set specific limits and let her make her own choices within those limits....

ex: "it's cold out you have to wear a hat, do you want to wear the blue or the red?"

if she requests attention by hitting or screaming, get down to her level and tell her that you will give her attention and ask her to speak instead of screaming. if you can't give her attention right then, let her know you will be right with her but you need to finish A, B or C first. Make sure you keep your word or your daugther will revert back to screaming

Krista - posted on 10/12/2010

At that age, they are desperate to assert their own independence and decision-making. My recommendation would be to pack away any clothes that are not seasonally appropriate, so that those aren't options. Then, when it's time to get her dressed, lay out two different outfits, and tell her that she can choose either one, or can mix and match from either one. That way, her options are narrower (which saves you a lot of time), but you are still letting her make some choices and have some autonomy. So she might wind up wearing purple pants with a brown top and red shoes, but in the grand scheme of things, that doesn't matter.

Lucy - posted on 10/12/2010

Well, kids of that age will push to find out where the boundaries are, my daughter was just the same at that sort of age!

For me, it's an opportunity to make the boundaries clear show that Mummy's word is the bottom line, but also to let your little one have some personal choice and control.

I dealt with this with my daughter by giving her basic guidelines about what she had to wear that day so that it was appropriate for the weather/occasion and then leave the choice to her. For example, I might tell her it need to be trousers and something with long sleeves, then she could choose from there. Sure, she'd sometimes end up wearing some interesting colour and pattern combinations, but hey, if she was warm, comfortable and able to engage in whatever activities were on for that day, I was happy to give her that little bit if power.

Of course, if she kicked off screaming or hitting out, she would lose the privilege of choosing her outfit and be taking a little trip to time out!

Kate CP - posted on 10/12/2010

Why not let her dress herself? She's over 2 years old and she's not really a baby any more.