Table manners for a 16 month old?

Rebecca - posted on 06/23/2010

I was going to comment, but Tracy said pretty much everything I wanted to! The only thing additional for me is that mine is strong willed, and there were a few times I had to smack his hand to teach him to stop throwing food or utensils across the table, but he just turned 2 and doesn't do that anymore, so it's no longer necessary. It just depends on your child. Good luck!

Dawn - posted on 06/23/2010

Thanks Tracy! We do teach signing and while he is picking up on it, he is a far way from communicating with it. He has signed a few words a few times but seems to give one up for another. For weeks he was signing and speaking Dog, then a few days it was Bird, now it is eat!! He also knows the sign for More, but hasn't used it in context. I constantly sign and say All Done but he just smiles! He is a very busy and active boy, always getting into something new and trying to touch everything he shouldn't!! He is also very demanding but sweet, he has some great smiles and has these pretend fussing routines complete with bottom lip stuck out....he knows he is cute!! It will be work I know but I am up to it. I guess I needed confirmation; I don't always trust my husbands opinion!!

Tracy - posted on 06/22/2010

Hi Dawn,

Personally, I don't feel it is ever too early (or too late!) to start teaching a child table manners.

First of all, kudos to you for sitting and eating your meals with your son. This alone sets a great example. I am a firm believer in manners and ettiquette, and really believe that alot of life happens around the meal tables.

At your son's age, his brain is still growing in leaps and bouns, and mostly in tactile ways, that is by using his hands to explore everything. Smushing, squishing, fingerpainting and spreading his food is actually great for his brain development, although not so great in the manners department.
Does your son communicate with you in a clear fashion? Is he able to let you know if he is all done or if he wants more? I have 4 kids, and we used sign language with all of them, and boy oh boy, did that make life alot easier! I would start by giving them a few pieces of food, and then when they were done ask if they wanted more or if they were all done, They would sign 'more' (fingers and thumb of each hand together in an O shape, tapping together infront of them) and say "More" as their speech progressed...starting from just a grunt, to a mmmmm to "mo" to "more". I would then give them some more. If they were done they would sign 'all done' (hands open, palms down, waving over the tray in front of them) and again say "all done" as their language skills allowed, progressing from just noise to "ah dah" to all done.
When they start throwing thngs off the chair, I felt it was a sign that they were done. I would remove their food and say "all done". Same with the cup. I would say "no pouring milk on the table. All done" or something like that and place the cup out of reach on the table. They could ask for it back and I wouldgive it back, often with the same results, but they'll figure it out. Banging forks, cups and such is pretty normal too, I would hold their hand and say "gentle" or "be nice" or "shhhh, no banging"...you follow LOL
I would encourage you to stick with it. Maybe keep a board book or something by his chair so that when he is finished with his meal, he can sit nicely in his highchair while you finish yours. For me that's part of tablemanners and respectfulness, but I understand that not everyone feels that way LOL.

Again, good on ya for wanting to teach your son manners. He will thank you for it one day...and so will his wife LOL

Good Luck!