Tisha - posted on 10/04/2010 ( 44 moms have responded )
My husband and I have been together for 11 years. We have two children together. He was never a fan of the idea of having kids. He loves our children very much and is an awesome dad but it wouldn't have bothered him if we never had kids. I have kicked around the idea of having one more child but he has made it very clear that he is not on board with that idea. Now I am okay either way. If we do have more then we do and if we don't we don't. We earn a decent living to support two kids but things are tight sometimes and I do look at how things would be in the future. Such as having to put 3 kids through college would be a lot more difficult than two or like when the last 3 years we spent about $300 on back to school supplies for our 8 year old but this year it was closer to $600 because they are both in school now. I have had an IUD for 4 1/2 years. I have a lot of problems with it and I don't want to have it put back in when it's time to have it removed. So, I have suggested a few times that he consider a vasectomy. He says no that I need to get my tubes tied. I really don't want to do this because I am not as dead set in my decision about having more kids. I forgot to mention that he is 8 years older than me. So he is in his thirties and I am in my twenties. I am still young and while I love my husband and I don't see anything happening with our marriage, you really never know now a days. Or, what if in 5 years we find ourselves in a better financial position and we can afford to have another child and live comfortably. A vasectomy is reversible (I know it's not 100% definite that the reversal will work but there is more of a chance than with having my tubes tied). Also, a vasectomy is less invasive. In reality he could go back to work 24 - 48 hours after having the procedure done. While the recovery is a little longer with getting tubes tied. I need some suggestions here. I don't want to force him to do something he doesn't want to do because I don't want him to resent me later but he really is the one that doesn't want more kids. I am the one that has battled with birth control off and on for 11 years and all of the side effects that come along with it. Shouldn't he have to take a turn?