Tantrums

S~ - posted on 05/21/2010

The thing that worked for one of my kids and it worked amazingly fast. Was Kevin Leman's advice. When the child is laying on floor having a tantrum is to very carefully step over them, (don't look at them when you do it!), then walk away. It works, before I did the whole step over bit she would follow me from room to room and lay down again and continue the tantrum.

In the store its much harder. I used to take my cart to customer service go home and immediately put child to bed. For a while I did all my shopping at night after my husband came home or I would drop her off at a friends house first.

Kelly - posted on 05/21/2010

i thought i was lucky untill last week when i had my first public meltdown... he lay down on the ground in the shop and cryed cause i wouldnt go where he wanted and he had to follow me... i walked off left him to it. Went back 2mins later andhe was so happy to see me he ran to me still crying but he listerned after that.

I had a couple look at him and me and just smile and laugh with me... ive always been scared of what ppl thought when kids do this and im glad no one seems to think i was doing it wrong... im sure the situation could of been worse for me and im gld it wasnt as at 35weeks preggiers i will be the first to admit i dont have the patience i normally have

Rachel - posted on 05/21/2010

I am always worried when my daughter starts to freak out in a public place, but I can say, when someone else's child starts up, it annoys me more to see the parent cave in, or truly hurt the child. Once, at walmart, I witnessed a mother (I use the term lightly) backhand a toddler to the floor because the child wanted something. Just remember when you're ignoring that tantrum at the store, us good parents are rooting for you!

Ann - posted on 05/21/2010

Thanks u guys...u giving me the hope that i cud survive situations worse than my imagination allows to think of :D
God be with us!..hehe

Lindsay - posted on 05/21/2010

Oh tantrums :/ hehe my son is 15months old and well into them now :o The important thing to remember is the reason they throw tantrum is because they have no other way of expressing themselves and if they pick up they get a reaction from you (for right or wrong reasons) they dont forget it in a hurry. Also when tantrums become full on, they also end up scarying themselves, cause they just dont have the understanding or control over themselves to end it and we need to be the ones to help them through it. At 10months i was completly ignoring the behaviour, as he got a little older i'd pick him up and place him on the seat whilst i'm kneeling at his eye level and say 'NO' firmly and just let him sit there till he had relaxed abit, but he's now getting to the full blown throwing himself down, kicking, screaming and breath holding. All normal, but not any easier :s it can be scary at times, but i never let him pick up on the fact its stressing me to and with ignoring it i'm finding the tantrums are ending as soon as they've started and we just move on and i make a big effort to praise the behaviour i'm looking for.
Good luck, you'll be fine, we all find our own way to deal with them and its ok to need to take 5mins after to recover yourself. It is stressful and upsetting, but remember its just as scary for them x

Kelly - posted on 05/21/2010

let him cry... he needs to learn. I use to have the same prob and i use to give him about 3 other toys to play with and then it was up to him if he didnt play with them...
He has to learn he cant have what he wants all the time and sorry to say the phase does come back in later years...
my 3yr old is doing the same again and we are back at the beginning again teaching him he wont always get what he wants and when he wants it.

good luck and be strong