to corner or not to corner?
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Saskia - posted on 09/29/2009
i have the corner with my 19 months old and it works really well
always talk to your child tell them why and be persistand even if you have to put them back 20 times lol it will work. you'll be surprised how much they understand!
Deborah - posted on 09/28/2009
show the child how you want him/her to do things, like picking up a toy. make it a game and "practice" with that child several times a day until you think they have it.
sometimes they just want your attention and they know exactly how to get it. i hope this works.
Hanna - posted on 09/28/2009
My little boy was the same, a repeat offender! He would go and do the same naughty thing straight after being put in time out. Then I started to take his favourite toys away (thanks Supernanny!). If he repeated the same bad behaviour I would take his favourite toy & put it in a "naughty box". Basically a plastic box with a sealable lid. First I added his beloved "Mr Hunny Bunny" then his pacifier/dummy and so on untill he got the message. It took a few goes but now all I have to say is "do you want bunny to go in the naughty box?" and he will immediately stop. Supernanny website is great, she has some good ideas. I just adapt them to my childs needs.
Betty - posted on 09/28/2009
If time out's don't work it's because he isn't ready for them yet. Just remove him from the situation and tell him 'NO'. If he throws a fit than walk away from him or put him in his room until he calms down. Redirect him by showing him what he CAN do or SHOULD do. You should give the corner thing another try in a few months when he is older. Good luck.
Jan - posted on 09/28/2009
Have you tried diffusing the situation before it comes to that? You've got to have eyes up your a**, but when you see him about to do something he should'nt, try saying something like " no, no, no" in a really loud but playfull voice & tickle him. It'll take his mind off what he was about to do! If he's already done it, then just move him away & firmly tell him NO, he is a bit too young for the naughty step I think. Good luck. x
Manda - posted on 09/28/2009
I think at that age I had mine sitting on the bottom step or in a kitchen chair for a minute. All the corner did was give them a place to wipe their noses on my wall which just got them in more trouble. I also had a clear toy container and would make them sit and look at what they couldn't play with until they behaved. I know it sounds cruel but it worked wonders.
Kate CP - posted on 09/28/2009
I would say if he's repeating a certain behavior over and over and not responding to the consequences then you should step up the punishment. If he's throwing a toy at his siblings then take the toy away and he can't have it for the rest of the day. If he's biting then he has to play by himself after his initial time out. Good luck. I know this is a tough thing to deal with. :/
Angie - posted on 09/28/2009
Wow thank you to everyone for all the feed back, I think I need to explain a little better though. My eldest, would, from 2yrs sit in a naughty corner and the 'naughty' behaviour would stop, with this one he goes to the corner, sits his punishment out looking very sorry for himself, we have to eye-level explanation and love after and 2 min later he's doing what he was doing to land him in the corner in the first place. I am very firm with him and once put him in the corner 15 times in the space of an hour for repeatedly doing the same thing wrong... STUBBORN! So you see I feel a little 'Not in control" of this little one, when it comes to punishments????
Betty - posted on 09/27/2009
I say put him on his bed for timeout. He might even fall asleep before it's over and that is what solves the problem best, a well rested toddler. lol
That's where my 4 year old does her time outs and there are times that she will want to stay in her bed afterward and take a little snooze.
Teresa - posted on 09/27/2009
Hi Angie,trying to find the right corner so to speak is always a difficult thing for parents, how your child responds is usual a clear indication of or how it will work, putting your little boy on the chair might be a better solution or on the bottom of the stairs might be better, and you may have to keep at this for a long time before he gets the message, (sorry) just keep taking him back if he gets up or moves away dont speak to him dont react to him if he is having a tantrum, just keep in control and show him you are in charge, if he has been put in the corner and moves out it has become a game to him so you need or you both need to stand firm and not give in, it may seem funny and to him I am sure a great game but it will only get worse unless you deal with it at this young age now. hope thjis helps you good luck let me know how it goes or if I can help again.
Carolyn - posted on 09/27/2009
Great advice Anita, a couple of my kids daycare centres use the highchair and it seems to work well for them. I have a small carpet matt for each of my kids and put the mat in thier corner (well wall for me). We have had days when all four walls of the family room has a child on thier mat,lol, one for 9 mins, one 8 mins ect. If they whinge or move off thier mat time starts over, this seems to work for me.
And as Anita said, I think it's important to get down to thier level to discuss it afterwards.
Anita - posted on 09/27/2009
i dont agree with maureen..at 18mths i say u can do time out on them and they will understand what your doing...i think if u leave it too late or at a later stage its harder..
what i do with my little one if i want him to stay putt in on spot is put him in his highchair either in the kitchen, hallway or corner for his timeouts (1min for every child year)..some mums dont want to use the high chair becos they dont want the child to associate time out with it, but i think kids are very smart and your child will associate what is time out (high chair in corner, facing wall if u like) or time for dinner (high cahir at the dinner table)...
i always take my lil one out of the highchair, get down to his level and explain to him why he was in timeout and then ask if he understands...then i would give him a cuddle and say everything is ok now and let him go and play...
Carolyn - posted on 09/27/2009
I don't know that time out is so important, I think it is a matter of the attention they recieve for behaviour. Kids will play up for attention, they don't really mind if it is good or bad attention, hence the time out method.
What ever method you use, just try not to give too much attention to poor behaviour and more attention to good behaviour!
Maureen - posted on 09/27/2009
i wouldn`t bother til they are two cos unless they understand they are doing something naughty then they have no idea what it about or will listen because they know what time out is my little is little over 2 and all i have to say it your`ll be it time out and he stops .
CRYSTAL - posted on 09/27/2009
well at my house we have a time out step, but you're right doesnt work well with younger children. with my 18 month old daughter we put her in her high chair and turn it so she cant see anyone then set the timer for 1 min (as our timeouts are 1 min per year). she doesnt like feeling excluded and seems to fix her behavior as soon as we let her down. hope it helps!
Danielle - posted on 09/27/2009
LoL........Our daughter is 23months and there is no way you will get her to do the corner. We have a timeout "playpen" and we also make her sit with us either on the couch or on our laps. This not only redirects her behavior but it works better than the corner. I think at this young of an age it is just not very effective to put them in the corner.