Coralie - posted on 09/26/2012 ( 14 moms have responded )
My fiance has a one year old daughter. She is wonderful and I love her so much! My soon to be step daughter was born out of wedlock. Her parents never dated. Even though she is a blessing, she was kind of an oops child. Do to the babies mother, my fiance and I were not allowed to be part of his daughters life until she was 5months old. Needless to say, he has a lot of catching up to do as far as bonding with his child. Here is the problem I have and need some advice. My soon to be mother in law is very overbearing and outspoken. My fiance has a difficult time standing up to her. We only get ten days out of the month to be parents his daughter, and every day we have her his mom wants us to come over. Now, I know it is only natural for a grandmother to want to spend time with her grandchild and if we were all bonding together as a family, that would be fantastic but that is never the case. Whenever we go over there with the baby his mom scoops the baby up and doesn't let anyone else touch her. She also gives me the impression that my bond with my stepdaughter is less important than her bond with her granddaughter. Now it is to the point that I dread going over to his parents house because instead of all of us bonding with the baby it is "lets watch grandma bond with the baby." Whatever she says goes and I think that while the baby is in our possession, my fiance and I need to be the only ones making decisions for her. We are her caregivers when she isn't with her mother not my soon to be mother in law. Am I completely over reacting to think this way? I love my soon to be mother in law, but I feel like at some point I am going to be the one to put her in her place and I don't know if that would be good for our relationship going forward.