What do you do when you catch your 14yr old daughter taking nude pics and emailing them to boys

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Angela - posted on 11/22/2009

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I got my son a samsung knack phone. it doesn't have a camera and doesn't accept pictures. this does not address the actual problem here, just thought it might be an option for you. this phone is actually for senior citizens, but i think the phone carriers should start marketing a cameraless phone for teens. my only other advice would be to take away any tethers for other media devices in your house....

Taylor - posted on 11/22/2009

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I'm only 21 so it wasn't very long ago that I was that age. I never sent boys nude pics but at that age I was curious. I would take her things away that enables her to do these things and sit and have a serious conversation with her. Especially this day in age when anything is possible. Not only could she get into serious trouble with old perverts or any pervert for that fact, but if one of those boys printed out the pic or sent it to other people in the school imagine the humiliation that she caused herself. And imagine the names she is probably being called at this moment too. So I'd take her things away, keep a close eye on EVERYTHING that she does and have a serious conversation with her about what she is doing. Like I said, I'm 21 and I have two little boys. I had my first at 19. Talk to her about pregnancy and would she want to give up her life and her friends now to take care of a baby? And I agree with taking her to get a pap. It probably would humiliate her and probably make her think twice about what she is doing. I know when I was 14 having my mom take me to get a pap I would have been embarrased. I hope things work out for you and I'll take all the advice I read here and keep it in mind when my boys reach their teenage years. Things would have really changed by then. LOL. Good luck!

Linda - posted on 11/22/2009

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Oh, yea one more thing always let her know that you love her, but this type of behavior is not acceptable.

Linda - posted on 11/22/2009

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Take everything digital away from her...until she shows herself enough respect don't allow her to talk on the phone unless you are present...if she doesn't like it; tuff....thats no way to earn respect from others that is called asking for it...i raised three girls trust me I know what I am talking about, my daughters are 22,21,20 there are things that are normal for teenagers to do this isn't one of them. Don't allow her to go anywhere with friends ground her and stick to your guns...you are the parent show tuff love I had too every parent has to sooner or later..if you don't stop this now you are in a world of hurt when she gets 16....at this age they have raging hormones...they have others conviencing them (boys) to act in ways they normally wouldn't (to be excepted, to fit in). Counciling might help, but I doubt it. Your daughter needs to understand what could happen if these photo's got into the wrong hands. Children especially young girls dissappear everyday because they were stupid over crap like she is doing I see it more than I care too. Scare the Hell out of her if that is what it takes. Take control MOM put a stop to it now...

Kasey - posted on 11/22/2009

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Disipline definately. Personally, I would take the cell phone and computer away from my child. I would also seek counciling for her. This is a growing problem among youth and now a days in several communities, the police are getting involved. This can be considered child pornogrophy.

Angela - posted on 11/22/2009

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LOCK DOWN NO PRIVILEDGES AND SHE GETS TO SHOW THE PERSON WHOM SHE WOULD LEAST WANT TO SEE THOSE PICS--HERSELF...I don't know what else, but I would get creative and get my point across...maybe make her go to a meeting with victims of rape ...or volunteer hours of her precious time doing something that will enlighten her to the end result of that behavior and what that is saying to the world about her--let alone the danger with so many pedophiles and sick-os...boy, I am sure I could come up with some good ones. My daughter is only under 3 but I am already stressing about just your type of situation. I would like to hear what you decide to do...if that's not too intrusive. OR A COMBINATION OF ALL OF THESE!!!



However, I would HATE to be that little girl (my daughter, fast forward) standing in front of her big, bad daddy...oooooooooEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!! My reaction will only be a footnote... LOL

Tanya - posted on 11/22/2009

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The 13 yr old was drunk, passed out and naked w/a bunch of guys around her?!!!  Did anyone hear the news report about the 15 yr old girl in California who was liqured up and brutally beaten and raped repeatedly by a group of guys between the ages of 14 and 21, while 20 other teenagers stood around and watched and cheered and video taped it for 2 hours - and she was found under the bleachers left for dead?? Grounding her for a week?? Are you kidding me!! She needs some solid parenting, not some frivulous punishment! How does ANYONE know she wasn't raped that night?! Or the next time it happens! Parents need to wake up and recognize that w/o them involved in their kids' lives and taking control over their teens, their daughters could end up like the 15 yr old who is in ICU and struggling for her life!!!! OR could be one of the teens involved in the brutal raping and facing 20 yrs to life!!!!!!! MAN UP PARENTS AND TEACH YOUR CHILDREN RIGHT FROM WRONG, GET INVOLVED IN THEIR LIVES AND BE THERE FOR THEM WHEN THEY ARE FACING TOUGH DECISIONS. STOP BEING PASSIVE AND LETTING THEM LEARN ON THEIR OWN - AND DISCIPLINE THEM WHEN THEY FREAKEN DESERVE IT FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 



Sorry, I just feel terrible for kids who are making bad decisions in their lives and whose parents just don't seem to "get it". It is not your neices fault that she was in that situation. She needs her parents to get involved and help her through the tough years, not take away her phone for a week then send her back out to the wolves! I wonder what parents are so afraid of and why they don't help their kids when they see they need the help!  Your kids are young enough that you can mold them BEFORE they are teenagers making bad choices. Don't wait until they reach the teen years to begin the molding, or to put restrictions on them, because it will be WAY too late by then, and all you will get is rebellion.



 



 



Quoting tanya:

a dungeon is where my 2 turds are going when they're old enough lmao.... i feel for u! My 13 yr old neice was recently found online with pics of herself drunk and passed out naked with random dudes all around her! I was the one who found the pics and told her dad (my brother) his punishment was to tell her i was the dobber, ground her for 1 week, take her mobile ph off her for 1 week and give her school foods instead of lunch money for 1 week... all that did was make her hate me, and didnt stop her at all!
I really have no advice but its a good thing u know about it and actually want to do something about it! My kids are only 4 and 2 so i havent got that far yet so if u find something that works be sure to let me know so i can use that advice in another 10 yrs lol





 

Tanya - posted on 11/22/2009

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Wow, that is shocking! I can only imagine how terrible you must have felt when you discovered this! First and foremost, talk to her. Let her know the consequences -- that those pics could be sent around to everyone in the school, etc. Then, take away her privileges. She needs to understand that she broke the trust, so she has to gain it back and that takes time and proof. Personally, I would disable her email account and restrict her internet privies where you have a means of monitoring her actions. Plus, I would take away her "life line" - the cell phone that all teen girls are so attached to. And when she eventually earns it back, disable email and picture messaging from it. Also, she needs to know that you will monitor her activities on the cell phone and internet and if she does anything inappropriate again, her privies will be gone for good - and stand behind that 100%.

Tanya - posted on 11/22/2009

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a dungeon is where my 2 turds are going when they're old enough lmao.... i feel for u! My 13 yr old neice was recently found online with pics of herself drunk and passed out naked with random dudes all around her! I was the one who found the pics and told her dad (my brother) his punishment was to tell her i was the dobber, ground her for 1 week, take her mobile ph off her for 1 week and give her school foods instead of lunch money for 1 week... all that did was make her hate me, and didnt stop her at all!

I really have no advice but its a good thing u know about it and actually want to do something about it! My kids are only 4 and 2 so i havent got that far yet so if u find something that works be sure to let me know so i can use that advice in another 10 yrs lol

Bridgette - posted on 11/22/2009

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I know some ppl would think I am totally horrible for ths!

I would contact the att generals office and report the person she is sending it to, he may not me a minor! if he is a minor, they will let his parents know, they should be able to take your computer and go in and check and make sure she did not send this to any other adults u do not know about.

she could be on web sites..I have ran across children in sites, as I ran across a posting my own daughter made in a adult site, I did call the police.



I would call the police on her because this is against the law, it is child porn, she is breaking it and this scare can and will save her life!



ask for a officer to help you, explain to 911 what u want done..if u simply want to scare her, when a officer has some SPARE TIME, they can come help you.

I only say that because u waited.

I have zero tolerance for my children on the computer, I bought spy recon, its a wonderful investment, it will track every computer in ur home and all of her e mail addy's that u know about..and trust me, if she gets on any of htem on any home computer, it will log in every e mail addy, web site and all the passwords!



it has a remote so no matter where she is, it will send u a e mial, of everythign she does, even take screen shots, which would show you pictures of what sheis getting and sending.



the last thing i would do is, find out what is wrong.....in my opinion, she has somthing, very wrong..and she needs someone to talk to....if she dont feel she can talk to you, please, find someone for her to talk to......a close family member that wont betray her yet will tell you if she has endangerd herself more...a friend, fof age or professional help.



in my opinion, THERE IS A MUCH DEEPER UNDERLYING ISSUE GOING ON!



You and your daughter are in my prayers, you stand firm.....

GOOD LUCK!!!

Tamara - posted on 11/21/2009

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... AND for the parents who don't know most middle and high schools today have internet access via their libraries. So if the child is blocked from internet at home they can get access at school not just at friends houses. I would also be concerned about photos and these 'social networking sites'. Most teen girls post inappropriate photos without even realizing it.

Tamara - posted on 11/21/2009

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Taking all the technology away is a GREAT IDEA!! Wonderful idea!! BUT HELLO PEOPLE SHE'S 14!!! She'll go to school, borrow a friends phone, take some pics in the bathroom and text them to whomever or send them via the phone to whomever's email account and possibly even her own to send out later and delete the pics off the phone. Children aren't stupid in this techno driven world we live in. They find a way around the system or try to find a way to beat it.



You need to sit down with her and explain the ramifications of what she is doing and get her to see a therapist. She is seeking attention, why in this manner I'd be asking. I would take away her phone and computer privileges and modify them. I wouldn't take them away indefinitely. I would supply her with a non camera phone even if it has to be prepaid and a computer without a web cam. Keep in mind friends will have these items and teens have access to them. She has to be taught that once those pics are out there they are out there for the world to see for the rest of her life. And again.. get outside help ASAP.

Charla - posted on 11/21/2009

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I had the police come and talk to BOTH of my girls when I caught them sending naughty pictures. They lost all internet and phone privileges and I monitor them like a hawk.

Charla - posted on 11/21/2009

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I had the police come and talk to BOTH of my girls when I caught them sending naughty pictures. They lost all internet and phone privileges and I monitor them like a hawk.

Charla - posted on 11/21/2009

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I had the police come and talk to BOTH of my girls when I caught them sending naughty pictures. They lost all internet and phone privileges and I monitor them like a hawk.

[deleted account]

Quoting Loureen:

You know the problem is many teens are short sighted and cannot think ahead into the future THAT is why they get into these situations they dont know how its going to affect them in ten years .


I absolutely agree.  Alot of good points have been made but when it comes down to it this may just be an example of the peer pressure that teens face today.  All generations deal with it in some form or another.  Because of technology, the issue is just more extreme now.  Just the other day, I had a friend find a cell phone of which upon opening they found tons of pornagraphic videos and clips that this young girl had taken of herself.  If someone else had found that phone she may be on You Tube right now.  I think you need to make sure that she knows you empathize with the pressures that she deals with, see if she'll actually share them with you (that's probably crazy talk with a 14 year old:) and then maybe, hopefully, you can give her some ways to counteract those problems. Good luck!

Amy - posted on 11/21/2009

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If that was mine she would never have a phone again. I take the phones and monitor things close. I think I have her phone more than she does, and yes she hates it it also has a block during certain hours. I have 4 teenagers with phones and the 1 always abusing it. I would also take away her life she would not have one outside of church and school and would look into the boys too.

Lyndsay - posted on 11/21/2009

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I think you really need to make her aware of what can happen to those pictures... all the millions of people who can potentially see them. When I was 15 I sent my boyfriend a nude picture and THANK GOD nothing ever came of that because I would have been mortified now (as I am becoming a child educator lol). And also remind her that those pictures, if ever seen by law enforcement, would be considered child pornography and anyone in possession of them would be charged. (In an extreme case, you could even call the cops and have them arrest the recievers!)

Nadine - posted on 11/21/2009

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everyone gave you good advice , all I can do is wish you luck with a teen daughter. They are very hard to raise. I have two daughters and they were both into much more than I ever was.

Cassandra - posted on 11/21/2009

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Quoting Kate:

Take away her phone, her computer, and anything else she can take pictures with. If she wants to use the internet then she has to use a terminal where you can see it. Disable the email and text/picture messaging functions on her cell phone. And do like Laura said, talk to her. I would also point out that there are a lot of creepy old men out there who like to find girls like her and rape them (not totally true, but a little scare may be good for her).



I agree with this response. And it is true that there are creepy old men that look for these girls. They can track  her through her url address. I went to a internet training course with our local police dept and they showed us how they do it. I was so horrified that I could do nothing but just cry. Protect your baby anyway possible. Don't worry about her getting mad at you and telling you it's not your place to invade her privacy. She is still a kid and she has no rights or privacy. Remember you are in charge and still her parent. You are the one that is responsible for her actions. And if she is not capable of controlling herself, it's your job. Good luck. You have a long and hard haul ahead. Keep your head up and eyes open.

Jenny - posted on 11/21/2009

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BTW, my daughter is not and has never been sexually active. Sending nude pictures is a way to satisfy and express themselves and the curiosities. This does not automatically mean they have done anything.

Jenny - posted on 11/21/2009

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My daughter did this. I had the police and the counselor involved. The police say that it was not anything they can prosecute. She did it. The only way they can do anything is if the boy is over age, which he was, and he asked for the pictures, which he did not. The counselor said that the pictures are basically new aged flirting, but way beyond what we did! They have the technology at hand and are so curious and confused that they often make the wrong choice.

We spoke with the boy and his boss! He asked us to speak to her. He was innocent. My daughter found him on an online game site. We let her on because we moved across the country and this was a nice site where they could play games and chat with friends the left. He was not a monster, but a 19 year old boy who got into more than he could handle! She is not longer allowed on the computer unsupervised, she cannot have a phone unless she it away from us and may need to call. This happened when she was 13, and now she is almost 16. She is not proud of that decision. We freaked out at first, but then we realized that she needed to talk and to understand more than she needed to be in trouble. But, she did get both. She was grounded from everything, went into counseling, spoke to the police, and had a heart to heart talk. I can say that I am proud of her. She has grown from it.

One thing that I got from counseling is that this is not abnormal behavior from teens now. It is not okay for them to do, either. Instead of prank calling and T.Ping houses, they text and send dirty messages and pictures! I am not happy about it. But, i am braced for my other daughter who is just now 13.

Good luck and keep strong morals and values at home. Keep communication open.

Jennifer - posted on 11/21/2009

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Take away the computer/phone/camera! Have her attend a rape support group meeting.

Marchel - posted on 11/21/2009

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Of course you need to take away the affiliated privilages. I would also go so far as to inform the parents of the boys she sent them to. Then simply do a little research of teens who did the same and came to regret it once they became public. Whether it is now when she is still a teen or even years later when she is applying for a job, or her daughter is on line, or worse.



I tell my tween (12) that a good rule of thumb when it comes to sending information out there that you can't get back like an email, text or even an old school note passed in class is would you want your grandma, mom, dad, brother, or neighbor to see it? Then think twice. Assume it is gone and will be shared with the world.



Sure she may be able to trust the person she is sending it to but what about his sneaky little brother or buddy. What if his parents saw the pictures. It is all about image and what message she is trying to send.



If she wants to be sexually attractive, and I think that ship has sailed, then you need to have a discussion about healthy, safe, appropriate ways. There is obviously more after this of course.

Tammyandmatthew4 Eva - posted on 11/21/2009

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trust me love my sister has been doing that and it not nice just talk to her about how bad it is from doing that even if you have to stop her from going on to the internet and tell her you dont get nice men on here and make sure she is safe really just dont make it sound bad cos she will start to hate you just show her things what happened to this kids this day and then i think she will get the idea how bad it really is cos you dont even no if she is meeting up with this people

Fern - posted on 11/21/2009

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I agree with all the comments. I think you have to set some real limits by taking away any access to doing this again until you are sure you can trust her. I think she needs to know the risks and consequences of her actions. But I think the one thing that was missed here was the talk about what happens if she gets pregnant. She needs to know the choices she will have and the decisions she will have to make, because if she isn't sexually active yet, she was sure headed in that direction. Girls this day and age need to be told about abortion, the morning after pill, adoption, keeping the baby, etc. Most adults don't even know what an abortion entails. I think as parents we need to educate ourselves so we can teach our children. The morning after pill and the birth control pill both work in two ways. They try to prevent ovulation, but the backup system no one talks about is that they prevent a fertilized egg from implanting in the mother's uterus. Some feel this is abortion, because it does not prevent fertilization. Its a personal decision based on your beliefs, but I am more and more believing that most birth control is dangerous. There is a woman that was working for planned parenthood, rather high up in their company as a director of one of their facilities. She decided to watch an abortion one day and saw the baby on the ultrasound screen move away from the instruments that were about to take its life. She quit her job and is now speaking out against abortion. Look it up, its all over the news/internet. Planned Parenthood is trying to get a gag order to keep her from talking, because they make big bucks on these teen pregnancies. Our daughters need to know what really happens if they opt for an abortion or the morning after pill. The IUD is no better and is not recommended for women who have not had a baby, but many doctors are risking making young girls infertile by putting in IUD's. So I think you should have a frank disucssion with her about what happens if these pictures get into the wrong hands or she ends up pregnant or both! Check out this article: http://teenadvice.about.com/cs/optionsab...

Tammy - posted on 11/21/2009

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make sure she also understand that the boy or boys she is emailing these pics to could be arrested for position of child pornography

Dana - posted on 11/21/2009

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Take away any device she can use to take pictures until, she *seriously * realizes the complications of her actions.

Carolyn - posted on 11/21/2009

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Wow, Shawna.Ok.I agree with the taking everything she has in her room.They do belong to you.They were all lent to her by you.And she should but probably not be thankful to have the clothes on her back.We can't allow our kids to go so far then wreak havoc when they didn't see the boundaries clearly enough.First we must look at what can be done immediately.Taking phone away.And anything that doesnt take away needed comfort to survive.You know that beds aren't all that necessary but we dont want to appear crazy.We need our children to see that we are in full control.Of them and ourselves.Or how can we expect them to take control of themselves?We must stay calm.But after we take immediate steps then take a serious look at our own lifestyles and what did I allow her to do or like someone here mentioned did someone do something hurtful to her to make her think that this behavior is acceptable?Have a calm talk with her.Be firm.Don't give in.But don't let her have any more electronics til she has proven to be mature.

Pam - posted on 11/21/2009

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Explain to her she is worth more than her body. She needs to respect herself in order for others to respect her. And once it is out in the cyber world it will always be there.

Laura - posted on 11/21/2009

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Very bad news..Therapy!!! There needs to be a why behind that extremly inappropriate behavior.That is called sexting and if the school caught her she could be expelled.

Laura - posted on 11/21/2009

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Very bad news..Therapy!!! There needs to be a why behind that extremly inappropriate behavior.That is called sexting and if the school caught her she could be expelled.

Shawn - posted on 11/21/2009

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A quick history: I recently took everything my daughter has except her bed and her clothes, back pack and 2 pair of shoes. Yes, I have done that more than once in the last 2 years. I also recently (after bad grades and a lot of distraction b/c of boys) took my daughter out of the main public school and enrolled her in a very strict Charter School. Her next step is home school and worse case scenario - boot camp. She's not a bad kid, I just have no interest in seeing her turn into one.



Forgive me for not saying what's popular - b/c i have one of those myself (a 14 y.o. girl) - you need to take EVERYTHING she owns and DARE her to complain. Don't take rebellion sitting down honey - your kids will walk all over you - been there, done that. If she doesn't get it together w/ punishment and long understanding talks and decides to "rebel" and act out, kick her butt! If you don't believe in that, you have to make your daughter think you are close to nuts - no yelling, no screaming, just you in her face talking really close to her while nearly holding her against a wall. I was a HORRIBLE teenager to my family and had very little self respect. Girl, you don't have to be a stressed out miserable prisoner b/c of your child. She is supposed to conform to house rules or face consequences...if that doesn't work, threaten to send her to boot camp or "home away from home" if she doesn't get it together (and be ready to follow through). If she is taking pictures now, imagine what she might be doing when she's around these boys. You don't want to be a grandma this year or w/in the next 4-6 years...it's not good for her. I KNOW what I am saying is NOT popular nor does it work in every family, but in my family and many families I know, love and respect, that kind of behavior can not be tolerated b/c it will only progress and get worse. I wish you SO much luck - I know what you are going through.

Sheila - posted on 11/21/2009

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Hi, you ask her why she is doing it, listen to what she is saying, don't shout just listen and advise her to watch what she is doing as it could be dangerous. Above all keep communicating with her and don't judge. good luck

Sheryn - posted on 11/21/2009

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OMG this is a worry.If I caught any child/step child of mine doing that Id be taking the computer etc away from them (except for school work).If they were to use it it would be under supervision.Does she understand the risks and reprocutions of her actions?Does she realise that these boys that shes emailing dont care about her and will call her every name under the sun degrading her.Why does she think its a great idea?Perhaps theres a emotional issue?Whatever the reason she needs to be spoken to

Joye - posted on 11/20/2009

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AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! is my first reaction. I also agree with "Lock her up in a tower", but since that is not an option, it is very important to let her know that what she is doing is called "sexting". It is greatly frowned on by the law and, just recently, a judge made an example of teens doing so. It can also come back and bite her in the butt. If they break up and the young man wants to be vindictive or if he's just not mature enough and think it's funny to send around. It can also have a tragic ending. Check out the following link http://www.wlwt.com/news/19164974/detail... You can also google "sexting and the law" to see what you can find. That's how i found the page I gave you.

Catherine - posted on 11/20/2009

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I think you have got to ask yourself where she learnt the behavior from, and eliminate it.



A child at that age does not know better, and should not have access to the equipment to do so.



Tiem to pull in the reins, or loose her all together.



Tale control and be a parent....

Corral - posted on 11/20/2009

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Have your daughter read this, I started gettin sexually active at 13, i am not bragging, i am actually mad at myself for NOT listening to MY PARENTS. @ 16 i had first my first child, a boy. I don't regret either of my children, i now have 2, but i wish i would have WAITED. Life is hard, take ur time, when u mature u will see that there are a million boys out there, and u will also see that there are more important things out there. Even though this has nothin to do with sendin pictures n stuff, eventually it will lead to sex, if it already hasn't. Mom, talk to her about risks; child predators, human trafficking, these are very scary and serious things, along with teenage pregnancy. Help her understand why this is not appropriate. I am also a mother of a daughter, although she is only 9 months old, i am scared out of my mind, thinkin about when she starts to grow. All we CAN do is advise and try to direct them in the right direction. This is where ur guidance comes in, show her the other road.

[deleted account]

I agree with Laura Kate and Jennifer Valdez. Jennifer points out that women and children are being sold for sex. This is rampant in our world. Check out with your daughter, Women at risk or WARInternational.org. Also, as a child who was sexually abused, I enjoyed vying for boys attention through many similar behaviors-which at times I found myself in dangerous situations. Get to her heart somehow..research ways you can find out if she does this because her self-worth comes from the attention boys will give her, or was she abused and hasn't told anyone, or is it just for popularity. I have a 13 yr old daughter and I am concerned over how she values herself and through what she finds self-worth in. oh, yeah like these women and others said. Take away all communication and camera devices. She will hate you~but love MUST be tough and in time she will love you for you love!

Liz - posted on 11/20/2009

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I'll agree with the masses on the fact that the phone and internet must be taken away. Children this age can be trusted with this sort of technology so long as they use it appropriate. I'm not saying ground her, I mean take it away. Maybe when she is 16 she'll of grown out of this stage and sexting won't be the rage among teens and maybe then she might be able to be more responsible with a phone and computer. Also, I would totally cut off any association with any friends you know are doing the same thing. Would you allow her to hang out with people who were doing drugs? Is this worse? After that comes not one but several talks in a very calm manner about the ramifications of such actions, about why she felt it was okay to do this, about how self respect can be achieved in productive ways.I have one 12 yr old daughter and one who is 19, at least in my house small calm talks that stop before emotion takes over works better than my freaking out or trying to have one long conversation about a very big topic. Maybe she would like to get into modeling classes? This all might sound harsh but is a temporary grounding really going to change why this happened? The picture getting out to the whole school might make her regret it but a limited time grounding is not. She'll just be counting the days till she's free to do as she pleases. After a year , then 2 she might stop counting days and start thinking why all this happened. I also agree the parent of the other teen involved should be notified. Yes, the might still take the case to the police no matter what you say or do, can never predict how another parent is going to respond, but that too is a consequence of sexting. Life is full of consequence and reward might as well figure that out now rather than later.

Tammy - posted on 11/20/2009

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That would be sexting and I believe that is a crime.

Personally I would have a nice long talk as many others have already stated. I would also block anything on the cell phone that would send pictures and not let her use the computer ... these things will be out there and will definately hurt future chances of college applications, future jobs etc.



Hopefully you have a pretty open relationship with communication.

Lauren - posted on 11/20/2009

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Take her computer away! I teach 8th grade and it starts with pictures, and sexting and ends with a baby before graduation.

Daphne - posted on 11/20/2009

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VERY VERY good info from everyone. I completely agree but want to add one more thing....LOOK for signs of abuse. Has she been sexually abused or could there be something going on right now? My experience as a social worker tells me that she may not have good boundaries with her body and that it one of the characteristics of a child who has been or is being abused. If you are not sure.....ask a counselor for help or even talk to the school counselor for help.

Carolyn - posted on 11/20/2009

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Quoting Joanna:

first off, take away all her privleges for as long as you deem fit, banning the computer until she shows you can trust her. Secondly, make sure to stress the importance that pictures are forever, and no matter who she thinks she can trust, they will always be around and can pop up at the worst times, meaning she could be fired from a job for it, or not accepted into certain colleges, etc.



I agree with this.

Tametra - posted on 11/20/2009

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I agree phone, computer and all should be taken away. Talk to her in Love and thoroughly explain the consequences of such an action. Talk to her about peer pressure and why she felt the need to do this.

Melanie - posted on 11/20/2009

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Explain to her the conseqences, how dangerous, how damaging, the rumors...My daughter took one of her in her bra and I contacted the person she sent it to also nad told him he better erase it...and take away her phone if she doesn't take you seriously.

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