What does it mean if my 17 year old daughter's boyfriend (also 17) wants to introduce her to HIS mom? Is that odd for their age? They have only been together for a couple of months

[deleted account] ( 25 moms have responded )

My daughter has her very first boyfriend- We have met and gotten to know him as he comes over on weekends to hang out with her at home. We felt this better, so we at least know what is going on. He is a great boy and we have no complaints.



Now he wants to introduce my daughter to HIS mom- Is that odd? I mean usually happens to older couples. I am not complaining as I think its great he is thinking of my daughter seriously enough to want his mom to meet her, but is that a step a little too premature? Toos fast into the relationship?



Do we later need to meet HIS parents too? Seems a little weird due to their age.



CONFUSED...

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~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/02/2012

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I don't understand the double standard, and that is exactly what it is. Sorry, not trying to come down on you, but it really seems like you feel you have more of a right to meet your daughters bf early on, but his parents should not be interested. That is just silly.



They may be more serious than you think. It might be each others first love and they want to be a true part of each others lives, and that starts with meeting each others parents. Hell, I bet his parents know that he has met you and is always over there....and are like "why haven't WE met your girlfriend, we would love to have her over and meet her"



Just because he is a boy, doesn't mean the parents are not interested in his life. Please, for the sake of your daughter, drop the double standard.

[deleted account]

Not at all. If my son (at 17) started to see a girl I would want to meet her ASAP. They are still kids really and I see no issue with his Mum wanting to meet the person who is probably his greatest influence at this time in his life. I think it's sweet. Just relax and let things take their course.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/02/2012

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But still, you are missing the point and not answering the question. Do you think it is odd YOU met HIM???

Dove - posted on 11/02/2012

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So then I take it you don't have any sons? I guarantee you 'I' am going to be just as interested in meeting my son's girlfriends as I am my daughter's boyfriends. I'm sorry, but your concern and thinking it is weird makes zero sense to me as a mom of both genders.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/02/2012

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WHy is that odd? You met HIM, why wouldn't he want to introduce his girlfriend to his own mom? I mean he has met his girlfriends mom. I am a little confused by WHY you would think that is odd.



And yes, if my kids have boyfriends or girlfriends, I would most def want to meet them and their parents.



Think back to being 17. It may be young to you now, but they are almost adults. I remember clearly being 17. I think it is great they want to know each others family. Why would you NOT want your daughter to meet his mom? I really hope you have not expressed this to your daughter. THAT would be weird.

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Kimberly - posted on 11/13/2012

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may i ask why its weird to have her meet HIS family????? she met you. as a mom of boys, I find it strange that some mothers dont want thier daughters to know the boyfriends family when we are just as nice and just as kind and have a home to welcome them to come watch tv and have sunday dinner too? as a mom of a son, its nice to know the world OUR SON is in and the company they keep...........what if my son is with a girl that isnt nice? NOT TO SAY YOUR DAUGHTER ISN"T.....but we love our sons as much as you love your daughter. just my side of things....

[deleted account]

How can this be odd? If I had a 17 year old son and he has been dating a girl for a while even though its only 3 months I want to meet her. I like to know what my son does when he is not around me and know all of his friends including the girls. The relationship may end soon but if it does not end I think its nice that you can share with your son and daughter all the different occasions that come up and the picinics and the parties and life altogether. It can be a serious relationship or just a casual relationship but what wrong with sharing?

Cherry - posted on 11/03/2012

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I think it is great that you have a responsible daughter and she has met someone equally responsible as well. They are not sneaking around, as so many others do. You are lucky to have such a smart girl! and it seems she has chosen a smart boy! Good Luck. I have daughters too so I understand your position.

Amy - posted on 11/02/2012

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There is no way my son would be going to hang out at a girls house every weekend and me not meeting her. As a mom I want to know everyone my kids are hanging out with whether they are dating or not. I don't think it's odd, I think it would be neglectful on a parents part not to meet the friends of their kids.

Jodi - posted on 11/02/2012

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I don't understand why you think this is weird. As the mother of a teenage boy, I'd want to meet his girlfriend, and probably her parents, if he was spending a lot of time at her house too.....

Denikka - posted on 11/02/2012

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If they've been together a couple of months, I kind of think it's a bit weird that she HASN'T met his mother yet, unless he doesn't live with his mom.

I know I met all my partners moms within the first few months, even my current (and hopefully last :P) partner and that was after high school while he was living on his own and she lived in a separate city.

Like Dove said, why is it normal for him to meet you guys, but weird that he wants to introduce his girlfriend to his parents?

~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/02/2012

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Oops. I think April left. Sorry April, no one was trying to run you off. Just trying to understand.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/02/2012

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Oh, and he and I were together for over 2 years. He and I were always at each others houses. Even for the holidays. It was nice.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/02/2012

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Actually, yes. I was 16 when I was with my first serious boyfriend. Not only did I meet his mother, but he met mine within the first month of dating. Sometimes kids actually like their parents and want to have them be a part of their joy in first love. I think that is great. Appreciate it and accept it....don't question it.

[deleted account]

My neighbour's boy is 18, his girlfriend is 16. They did it the "right" way. They introduced each other to the parents very early on. It's not as unusual as you think.

[deleted account]

Ladies I do have a son and I do want to ofcourse meet his girlfriend when the time comes- I am not anti anything , simply shocked that at 17 they are doing this right - can anyone say ALL 17 year old couples even meet each others family all the time ? That's a very small percentage - therefore is odd to me because I have he kids in that small percentage. Just shocked ladies that's all...

[deleted account]

No I don't find it odd we met him, we wanted to ofcourse- it's just that sometimes some boys aren't very attentive in wanting to this the right way and meet parents formally

[deleted account]

To clarify I have nothing against her meeting his family - I love that idea! Just maybe shocked at the fact that they are doing this he right way!

[deleted account]

I only mean is it odd because of how long they've been together (2 mos) meeting his parents seem like something that would happen a little further in the relationship ?

~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/02/2012

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It is so much better that they are being responsible and meeting each others families rather than sneaking around. Kudos to them.

Dove - posted on 11/02/2012

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If she matters to him I see no reason why it would be weird for him to want his family to meet her. If you had a son wouldn't you want to meet his girlfriend? The daughter's family doesn't have 'dibs' on meeting dating partners while it is 'weird' for the son's family. That just doesn't make sense.

Michelle1544 - posted on 11/02/2012

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Maybe his mom wants to meet the person he's spending time with. I think you are reading to much into it.

[deleted account]

Why is it weird he wants introduce her to his mom/family but not weird that he's met you and your family? I find this to be normal but I also come from a small town where as soon as you start dating someone they come to all big family gatherings like Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter and meet everyone from grandparents to aunts uncles and cousins. I would say if they date for a while yeah you probably well meet his family but who knows when that will be. The first time my parents met my husbands mom was about 6 months before the wedding and we had been together for 4 years. That wasn't intentional they just never expressed the need to meet before then.

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