What Kind of Example Will You Be to Your Child(ren)?

[deleted account] ( 2 moms have responded )

We all know that parents are meant to be examples to their children. When you think of the example you want to be to your own offspring (beyond, obviously, "a GOOD example"), what do you think of? HOW do you plan to be an example to them:

In daily life?

In ethical/religious/spiritual life?

In family life?

In community life?

In intellectual life?

In terms of teaching them to have what has been called "emotional intelligence"--the ability to deny themselves something they may want at this moment in order to obtain something of greater good later?

I'm guessing we'd all be interested in the specifics of how you plan to be a good example to those little blessings you've been given.

Incorrigibly,

Sharon

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Tracy - posted on 10/14/2010

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In daily life?
I try to demonstrate responsibility and obligations. Yes I know they don't want to get up and go to school, I don't want to go to work. But we each have a responsibility and obligation. To ourselves, to the family, and to society. We all pitch in on chores, from my 3 yr old to my 40 yr old. We work together to tackle problems, find solutions and compromises.

In ethical/religious/spiritual life?
We never promise the kids anything we aren't 110% certain we can deliver (barring catastrophe). We keep our word to them, good and bad. We teach them that all God's creatures are to be appreciated, and respected. Everything has a purpose here. We treat each other and others with respect, kindness and compassion because that is the way we wish to be treated in return.

In family life?
Family doesn't always mean blood relation. It's a bond that's far deeper. It's love and respect for each other. Not intentionally hurting those you love, and if done on accident being earnest in apology and learning from the experience so not to make the mistake again. My son has seen an abusive home, now he sees what home can be with two adults to honestly love, honor and respect one another. My girl will know nothing different than that in my home.

In community life?
We clean up after ourselves in the parks we frequent, and at times others too. When they are older and we are in a permanent house, I plan on doing some work with animal rescue groups.

In intellectual life?
Every day holds a teaching/learning experience, for us all. I grab hold of every chance I get to teach them something. Every vacation has to include something educational and fun.

In terms of teaching them to have what has been called "emotional intelligence"--the ability to deny themselves something they may want at this moment in order to obtain something of greater good later?
Never heard that in terms of denying oneself for reward later, more in the aspect of being able to recognize and communicate feelings. Which I am teaching both kids, not just the girl. And they both get an allowance for chores. My son gets $5 a week, and is learning that if he saves up a few weeks he can get that toy he really wants. The girl is just 3, she gets $2, and it's tucked away. She just wanted it because big brother has money. Also, they see us do without things we want because we're trying to save for a house. A home. I'll be fine without new jeans if it means I have a home of our own. And dogs.

[deleted account]

In daily life? I hope to show our son how pre-planning your day can enable you to get everything done but also how being spontaneous now and again can be real good fun! I plan to introduce simple chores around the home at an early age gradually so he knows that it's helpful to help mam and dad around the home.

In ethical/religious/spiritual life? I plan to allow him to find his own religion if he so wishes to do so but despite that will teach him the basic Christian morals which most people possess whether they are religious or not.

In family life? I plan to demonstrate the importance of family and that we should be around our family by spending plenty of time with other family members such as grandparents etc, and also stressing the importance of respecting your elders.

In community life? I plan to take part in cimmunity activities as Logan grows older. Currently I go to a few baby and mother groups at the local community centre and my husband is doing some voluntary work at a nearby school, as he needs experience to go to uni to do a Primary school teaching degree.

In intellectual life? I am starting to study towards a degree in criminology and psychological studies in january and should have completed that in around 3/4 years. This will show that even though I chose to have children, I still pursued something I wanted whilst still being able to stay home and care for my children.

In terms of teaching them to have what has been called "emotional intelligence"--the ability to deny themselves something they may want at this moment in order to obtain something of greater good later? Hmm, we will teach the importance of saving. We have already opened a savings account and child trust fund for him. He will get occasional treats but for bigger things he'll learn to save for them.

=] Most of the values my husband and I want to instill in our son are those our parents gave us.

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