Whats the best way to sleep train a child?

Rachel - posted on 09/21/2011

every child is different. we should be offering advice not putting people down

Rachel - posted on 09/21/2011

pamela that is kind of rude...and of course she may be exaggerating but that is to get the point across.. you can never spoil a child she was asking for advice not hurtful words

Pamela - posted on 09/21/2011

I have no idea what age you are or if this is your first child, however, you are the one in charge, not the child. When you have breastfed the child and he or she falls off to sleep, put the child down gently preferably on it's stomach and walk away. If the child fusses allow it to do so. Eventually the child will tire and fall asleep.

You are the one perpetuating the habit that is occurring by not being firm. BTW, no child on this planet can suck a breast "all night long" and not go to sleep at some point, so I feel you may be exaggerating a bit.

Kirsten - posted on 09/21/2011

@Jennifer, THANK YOU!!!! Well said! This isn't a site to be rude or demeaning. We're supposed to be offering help and encouragement to this mama, not acting like we're better or smarter! Plus, all babies are individuals. What works for one may not work for another. My brother and I were raised in the same house and were totally different in sleep habits according to my mom.

Christina - posted on 09/21/2011

My baby boy is 10 monhs old today, and I have been nursing him since birth, and co sleeping to get sleep when needed.He loves his mommy and is kinda spolied! He is my youngest with two older siblings ages 4 and 7.I have had a few nights recently where he will sleep 6 hrs before waking & wanting to nurse. I let him fuss awhile , and rub his back before picking him up, However I have not let my kiddos cry it out. His siblings are confident, caring, compassionate ,and just amazing children that still want to lay in my bed when able before bedtime.(They sleep in there own beds) I wish you all the best in your seach to discover a method so both of you can get some rest! I am heading to the library to find those two books that were recommended in previous conversations..12hrs still sleep & GoodNight Sleep tight. ^_^ I do want to say that some mothers with infants that are given a bottle from day one that choose formula seem to always say " My baby sleeps thru the nite!" I will not even comment on this.



~Blessings to ya Dawn

Sherri - posted on 09/21/2011

Just info for those who keep scoffing at my posts saying they can't sleep through the night and that is not the norm. Now this is not to say everyone's child will do this just that it isn't abnormal for parent's to expect by 5-6mo's that their child will begin to sleep through.

Oct. 25, 2010 -- There's light at the end of the sleep-deprived tunnel for parents of newborns. By age 3 months, and sometimes as early as 2 months, most infants are sleeping through the night, according to a new study, although their sleeping hours may not exactly match those of their parents early on.

"Two months was identified as the most likely age for infants to begin sleeping through the night under both the midnight to 5 a.m. criteria (the one criterion traditionally used to describe sleeping through) and an unspecified eight-hour criteria," says researcher Jacqueline Henderson, PhD, a post-doctoral research fellow of psychology at the University of Canterbury in Christchurch, New Zealand.

By age 5 months, more than half of the 75 infants studied were sleeping the same hours as their parents, the researchers found.

The study is published online in the journal Pediatrics.

Cherish - posted on 09/21/2011

I have an 11 mo. old baby that I have exclusively breastfed from birth. She usually co slept with my husband and I. Last month i put her crib, which she seldom used, into her brothers room. Now I nurse her about 9pm and put her in her crib after she is asleep. She sleeps until about4:30- 6:30 when I nurse her in my bed and then put her in her crib when she has soothed herself and fallen back asleep. She will then sleep for at least another 1 to 2 hours. depending on the comotion in the house. If she wakes up more often I still put her back in her crib after nursing her and she really does sleep better and so do I.We also use a white noise machine or a fan in the hallway. Hope this helps, I know your pain. I have 6 kids and the others weren't great sleepers. They usually started slepping through the night about 2yr. Though some were more like 3yr. :) Just love them and help them feel safe.

Sarah - posted on 09/21/2011

I followed the book "On Becoming BABY WISE" because it was recommended to me by my sister who's baby slept through the night at around 8-10 weeks. So I've used it on both my babies (3 yr old and 8 mth old) and they were both sleeping through the night also by 9-10 weeks. And they were/are exclusively breastfed for up to 6 months. I can't imagine an 11month old not sleeping through the night. Try the book.

Sherri - posted on 09/21/2011

Interesting Anne because I have worked with kids for the past 25yrs and very few of the daycare kids were not sleeping all night by 11mo's and I mean at least 6-8hrs. I mean literally only a handful did not.



What you are saying is actually the abnorm not the norm. From my 25yrs of experience. Although the difference is I have never known one person in 25yrs that was still nursing past a yr either.



I definitely agree with some of the others it is a habit, comfort and/or want vs. a need. A child does not need to feed at night by the time they are 11mo's. If you choose too that is great too but it isn't an actual need at that point.

Rachael - posted on 09/21/2011

My daughter is still night nursing too. She was nursing every 1 1/2 - 2 hours, but I've got her down to 2 (and on a good night, 1) feeding per night. I read "The no cry sleep solution" book and it helped. It's has so many options to try with your child, since every child is different. For my daughter, having her sleep in her own bed (not in my room) helped a lot. It was tiring at first because after every feeding, when she fell asleep, I would carry her back to her own bed. I also had her nap in her own bed during the day so she got used to sleeping alone and not co-sleeping with me. After about a month the time she slept during the night got longer. She's even had a few nights of sleeping all the way through. It's great! But it takes time if you don't want to let your baby cry it out. (which I didn't) Hope this helps!

Anne - posted on 09/21/2011

Sherri Champagne, that's hardly normal. It may be how your genetics (and thus, your kids) are wired for sleep, but it's definitely not typical.

50% of 2 year olds still need help or to be parented to sleep.

Colleen - posted on 09/21/2011

Dawn - we went to a sleep specialist. I charted sleep/wake habits, how he went to sleep, etc. The sleep specialist sat down with me and went over the information. She helped us learn to teach our baby better sleep habits (teaching us better ways to handle it all). She was so helpful and we left with a plan that my husband and I agreed on and we put the plan into place. We never left our baby alone to cry it out. There was a progression of one of us sleeping in his room with him and when he would wake up we would comfort him but not get him out of bed. In a few nights our son was sleeping much better (and so was I). From this, he is now much happier and when it is nap time or bed time he can't wait for us to put him in his bed. Our son was 10 months old and is 16 months now. We spend so much time teaching our kids all sorts of stuff and some children need help with learning to have good sleep habits and patterns. I have three children and they were all different with there sleep issues. Best Wishes to you!

Tiffany - posted on 09/21/2011

Well. If you want to get technical - 11 month olds no longer need food over night. That need stopped for babies between 4-6 months old.
That being said, nursing is used to sooth as well as feed. So I'd bet any money that your baby is really attached to being soothed by boobie. LOL
1- do you use a pacifier? If you do, I'd try replacing boob time with pacifier time, that transition will help baby self-sooth to sleep.
2, when he/she does wake, don't pull out the breast, try a little back rubbing first, if it doesnt work, pick him/her up and rock a little, but do eerything you can to make the habit break (because the baby is waking due to habit rather than hunger)

Good luck. It's hard, but self soothing is a super important skill to learn (personally, my daughter was not nursing til about 7am, from about 9-pm the night before at that age. But we worked on self soothing from about 5 months on...) and it's hard to teach. :) xo

Jennifer - posted on 09/21/2011

I feel the need to apologize for the tones of some of these reply's....for anyone saying it is the parent's fault that your child gets up..or who on earth has 11 mo olds that are NOT sleeping. How incredibly rude and presumptuous. Every child is different and every parenting style is different. Whatever works best for you and YOUR child is what is right for you. Nursing is tricky. Just because it is natural does not make it easy...like another Mom, I got less nervous with each one and was more and more successful each time. Trust your body. Stay in tuned to your little's ones cues and you will both figure this out together. To heck with rude postings and rude women. If we Mama's can't stick together and support another nursing Mama without the know it all and the animosity, then I am ashamed of you who bring that to the table. This Mama is stressed enough with no sleep and second guessing herself without anything negative from any strangers posting to her seemingly harmless question. Peace, Mama. :)

Alicia - posted on 09/21/2011

Wow, who wouldn't want to eat and be held all night! Actually I regret not teaching my child to comfort himself. The first child transitioned to his own bed around 4 or five years old. ( When he got to big we put a toddler bed next to our bed.) The second child still wants a warm body next to him at night ( be it me, his brother (who doesn't want to sleep in the same bed as him anymore) so if you don't envision sleeping with your child for years -start teaching them how to comfort themselves before they develop attatchment anxiety ( 2 8 months or a year -I forgot0 -this is only based on one case study however -MINE!

Tammy - posted on 09/21/2011

I know it sounds like a bad thing,but,let your little one cry itself to sleep.this is what I have done with my 3 children..they will soon realise, hey mum isn't going to pick me up..good luck..

Sherri - posted on 09/21/2011

@Katrina as I said that is great for you. I certainly do not knock you one bit for your choices. I am thrilled they work for you and your family. For most I would say it is not so cut and dry. Especially since the ones that don't have an issue seem to be the co-sleepers and most likely are full time SAHM's. The ones that really need to sleep train most likely need a significant more amount of sleep to function and be a great mom and/or work outside the house really requiring a steady amt. of disrupted sleep.



I personally do not believe children belong in my bed EVER. So co-sleeping was never for us. They have slept in their own space since the day they were born. I personally could not have survived if they were not sleeping at least 6-8hrs at a stretch by 6mo's.



You just do what works the best for your family. I think it is great you do what works best for yours and I think it is great that I do what works best for mine.

Liz - posted on 09/21/2011

What do we know about this child other than he's 11mo and wants to nurse and be close to his mom at night?



Not enough to say with such certainty that he "should" be doing anything.



What is his weight? Was he premature? What is his diet? What is his routine? Does he have a medical problem perhaps? (reflux, etc.) Is he teething? Is he working on a milestone like cruising/walking?



And most important of all, what is his temperament? Does he decrease tension by crying? (CIO can work for these babies, though I don't believe in CIO myself.) Or is he a tension-increaser -- and will cry until he vomits?



The best way to "sleep train" a child is to realize he's an individual.

Jennifer - posted on 09/21/2011

None of my children were "sleep trained." The concept of "sleeping through the night" was introduced by Dr. Spock in the early 70's with his first book. Children don't, on the whole, "sleep through the night." While it is nice for Mom and Dad if they do, on the whole, they don't. I am more of the mind that if my babies need me at night for any kind of reassurance, that I should be there for them. Teaching them to feel secure as they grow up in this world. By the time they were all 2 (and I have three children) they all "slept through the night" on their own. We have always had a strong and steadfast routine of either boobies, bath books,and bed, or once nursing was over, bath books and bed. I start at 6:30 pm and have them all in bed and read to by 7:15 and am back downstairs with kids in bed and sleeping for the night by 7:30pm. Even in the Summer.



I feel that babies are babies and when they wake up at night, they are fussing because they require a need of theirs to be filled...dry diaper? Or just to hear or see Mommy. I feel that their need to see/hear Mommy is not exactly a small need. It is what defines their whole lives. When they are old enough to sleep through the night, mine do. Naturally, on their own without any sort of classic conditioning....They sleep from 7:30pm to 8am every night. :) No matter what any of us say...you have to find what makes you comfortable and stick to it....that is they key if you plan to try one of the conditioning ideas...Good Luck :)

Kim - posted on 09/21/2011

By 11 months they should be sleeping through the night. I have 4 kids and it's all about consistency. You are being played and now you might need to be tough to fix this. It's like taking off a band aid. At night, you can still rock your baby for a minute, then put him/her down in the crib. Say "night, night" and you can even rub his back. But do not pick him up. Keep laying him down if he gets up, but don't talk to him after the initial "night, night". This might take time but it is worth it in the end. Don't rub their back until he falls asleep though. Just rub it to calm him and let them know you are they. Then step away and watch. Once he's quiet, then leave the room. Sometimes you may need to step out of their sightline. And you aren't abandoning your child. They learn how to sleep on their own and isn't that the point of parenting? Letting them grow up to be independent people. Good luck. You can do it:)

Christina - posted on 09/21/2011

@Katrina, I agree 100%. Night nursing is actually a very important part of the nursing relationship. Some babies (even breastfed) do sleep long stretches at night on their own...This is the exception, not the rule. Again, if it is causing you problems to wake up and nurse, by all means change it. However, I co-slept and nursed and I can assure you that I got a lot more sleep than most of my friends. My daughter is perfectly fine and very social. She sleeps well and *gasp* even asked to have her bed put in her own room. She was nursed back to sleep anytime she woke up until she was 2ish and when I say back to sleep, I nursed her until she was out cold. It's a matter of doing things on your timeline or on theirs. I choose to follow my babies cues and their timeline. When they are ready, they will sleep through the night. I never woke her up to nurse, I allowed her to nurse when she wanted to and when she was done, she let me know. You don't have "to be cruel" as a few people have posted. Almost everyone I know who did any kind of cry it out method with their children ended up dealing with night terrors for years. Teach your child that you are there when they need you and they will develop the ability to put themselves to sleep. Why would you want to force them to cry for you until they fall asleep from pure exhaustion and defeat because you never came? What kind of message does that teach your BABY?

Louise - posted on 09/21/2011

Hi there, my daughter used to sleep all night and then started teething which upset her routine completely. She is now 18months old and we have had a tough time with sleep as it wears you down if you don't get any. I've always tried to maintain the same bedtime routine, bath and a bottle of milk whilst in her cot, then waiting with her until she falls asleep and trying not to pick her up to rock her to sleep. She used to like it if I just held my hand on her whilst she went off to sleep. It may take me a while to get her to sleep but now she is only waking once during the night. It has taking some time to get to this stage but am now pleased that I persevered. I totally sympathise with you as my oldest girl didn't sleep a night through until she was five and use to wake bout 10 times a night. Good luck, and sometimes you just have to be cruel to be kind and I know its hard.xx

Yvonne - posted on 09/20/2011

Hi, I HAVE HAD 6 KIDS, THE MORE U GIVE IN THE HARDER IT WILL GET, IT MAY SOUND CRUEL AND HEARTLESS, BUT U NEED TO PUT HIM IN HIS COT , WITH A BOTTLE IF HE HAS ONE, AND MAYBE A FOVOURITE STUFFED TOY, MAYBE EVEN ONE OF YOUR OWN PILLOWS, WITH YOUR SMELL ON IT, AND LEAVE A NITE LIGHT ON AND GIVE HIM BIG KISSES AND HUGS AND SAY NITE NITE TO HIM AND SAY LOVE YOU , GOD BLESS AND WALK OUT THE DOOR. IT'S REALLY HARD TO MAKE THE CHANGE, BUT I FOUND IT TO BE HARDER ON ME THAN MY KIDS. UNLESS THEY WERE SICK AFTER THAT, THEY SLEPT BY THEMSELVES IN THEIR COT . BUT TRUST ME IT WILL WORK IF YOU HAVE PATIENT AND KEEP UP WITH IT, IT MAY TAKE A WEEK OR SO TO MOVE HIM OUT OF YOUR BED AND KEEP HIM OUT, BUT DON'T GIVE UP

Katrina - posted on 09/20/2011

@Sherri, I saw a couple of people on here that said their full time nursing babies slept thru the night early, but most of them did some sort of sleep training to obtain that result. So I disagree that their children or a great many don't need to night nurse. In the grand scheme of things I think that babies who are breastfed on demand (including at night) do not night wean before 11 months. Also needing to nurse at night goes beyond a nutritional need, but can be due to many other things. So sure, babies can be TRAINED to not nurse at night, but its not normal for them to do that nor does it natural occur often.

For me and my family CIO isn't for us nor is any other sleep training. I fed my boys on demand (except for the one time I tried CIO with my oldest). They both slept for a 12 hr stretch from birth, but nursed during that time. We co-sleep as well, so I can say that I have never lost a wink of sleep due to either one of them. Waking up and nursing them was never an issue. It would be my suggestion to continue nursing through the night... they are little for such a small amount of time.

http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/sleep/...

Marg - posted on 09/20/2011

Hi Dawn,At about 10mths my baby girl started standing up in the cot a couple of times through the night and not wanting to lay down,this is when I stopped BF at night and just kept laying her down and telling her mummy was here and just kept patting her to sleep, it only took a couple of bad nights and she gave up and started sleeping through, the baby whisperer book is a gentle approch and sleep trainning doesnt mean you leave your baby to cry,you stay with your baby until she is asleep, if you are willing to put the work in , it will pay off in the long run, I did this with my 3 year old too and she has been a great sleeper from 6 mths. Good luck !

Laura - posted on 09/20/2011

I used the advice offered my LCSW, Kim West, in her book, Good night sleep tight: the sleep lady's Gentle guide to helping your child go to sleep, stay asleep and wake up happy. It worked marvelously! My son was about 8 months (and still breastfeeding, mind you) and he started sleeping through the night (10.5 hrs) by the second or third week. I was against the "letting your baby cry it out"method and this provided me with an alternative that I felt comfortable with. If you're determined to get your baby to sleep through the night and you don't allow yourself to be guilt tripped into thinking that it's hurting your child to not be nursed and fed through the night (because it's not if you help him/her change those learned habits gently and gradually) then you will be able to accomplish it more easily than you imagined. Whatever you decide to do it's important that you feel comfortable with your decision, so good luck with that (it very well may be the hardest part!)

Rebecca - posted on 09/20/2011

What's "best" is what works for you and your child, and what you are comfortable with.
That being said, I am anti-cry-it-out, and tried the Pantley method, but what worked for me was The Baby Whisperer. My son was older, though, once we started using the BW's method (I tried Pantley for MONTHS). I'm not poo-pooing Pantley, plenty of people have used her method and succeeded, but it just did not work for us.
I don't think 11 months is "too young" for sleep training. Yes, your baby might still be waking up for feedings, and that's normal and you shouldn't necessarily try to cut that out. But that doesn't mean you have to nurse him/her back to sleep. You may not be able to help it, my son certainly started dozing almost the moment he latched on, but once he had nursed the normal amount of time for a feeding, I'd lay him down and he'd start crying. THAT is the part you probably want to fix. And you just have to know if you're baby is waking from hunger or some other reason. Mine had a habitual waking at 4 a.m. for a long time. He didn't need to be fed, or changed, he just got in the habit of waking up at that time for some reason. But do your research, read whatever books or sites or whatever you feel is the right path for you, and be ready for a long process, no matter what.

Elizabeth - posted on 09/20/2011

You need to give the child some cereal oatmeal or rice so they will be fuller going to bed they will sleep sounder on a full stomach.even with bottle feeding you are better to give up the night bottle first.Leave a small cup with some water they will drink that if you don't go in the room. you also can't hold the baby to sleep put them in the crib wrap them if possible it makes them feel secure they have to learn to fall asleep on there own I have twins they have been going to bed on there own since they were 5months old they still wake up here and there but I just sit with them and they go back on their own now they are 3.

Susan - posted on 09/20/2011

We had AWESOME results with Suzy Giordano's book, "12 hours sleep by 12 weeks old." Will work for an older baby too. Our kids still sleep 7 p.m. to 7 a.m. If you follow the system, it works like a charm.

Christina - posted on 09/20/2011

If you really want to change your sleep situation, buy/check out The No Cry Sleep Solution. It's fantastic. I refuse to let my babies CIO. This book has so many helpful tips and lays out a personalized plan to change your sleep. My daughter nursed to sleep and through the night until she was 2.5. She is 3.5 and sleeps fine. My 6 month old son sleeps a lot better than his sister did and I have done things exactly the same. Some babies are just better sleepers. We co-sleep, so we nurse and snuggle whenever the baby wants. My great-grandmother always said it's not an issue if they don't take it to kindergarten. Your babies will not be babies forever and they will sleep through the night. If the all night nursing is problematic for YOU, read the book I suggested. If you perceive it to be a problem because everyone says it is a problem, look honestly at your situation and decide if it really is an issue for you. If not, do what works for you. There is nothing wrong with still nursing your baby to sleep! :)

Sherri - posted on 09/20/2011

@Katrina I have already been notified of that. However, although you still nurse at 11mo's, many actually almost most of the mothers on here have stated that at 11mo's even the nursing children no longer required a nighttime feed any longer. So although yours do, a great many do not.



I am not knocking the fact that you opt to still get up and nurse them at 11mo's however, it is also completely normal to sleep through the night at that age too.

Katrina - posted on 09/20/2011

@Sherri That is very wrong.... Nursing babies and formula fed babies do not eat the same amount. It is very normal for an 11 month old breast fed baby to nurse during the night. Both my boys didn't night wean until they were 2.

Laura - posted on 09/20/2011

Can't try the CIO routine with my son. He cries so hard he starts gagging and throws up. I have to get him before he gets to that point.

Ana - posted on 09/20/2011

The best way is to keep to a schedule, it may be difficult at first to la tem down & let them cry, but it works & they will falls asleep, ut you have to kkep the schedule going.

Anitra - posted on 09/20/2011

My daughter was the same. She would only sleep swattled in a snuggie carrier or in car set or in bed with me nursing. She refused to sleep in her crib. I have a picture of her in a snuggly, in the carseat, sitting in her crib! Every couple nights I took one away carseat, then snuggly then she eventually slept in the crib. The sleeping while nursing, I stopped lying down to nurse. I'd wait till she was asleep in the snuggly and put her in the carseat so she would stiLl feel swattled and heat never changed cause she was in the snuggly so she didn't think anything changed and eventually she was in her crib. I hope some if any of this helps. :)

Rachel - posted on 09/20/2011

my 8 month old was sleeping through the night and now she is up two or three times and drinking a ton....i dont know either! tonight i am going to try to let her cry it out..they know you will come to them so that is why they cry...i will give her 15 minutes and if it doesnt stop i will get her or just sleep next to her but not feed her and let her scream in my arms so she gets used to NOT eating in the night....they are getting enough calories during the day that they do NOT need to eat at night...they just like to

Sharon - posted on 09/20/2011

I think she's the best:

https://www.facebook.com/pinky.mckay

And she's holding a free teleseminar on this topic tomorrow (and it will be recorded)

Shannon - posted on 09/20/2011

The best advice I ever got from a mother of 4 was turn off the baby monitor. My son has slept through the night since he was about 10 weeks old. He was in his crib at 6 weeks and has NEVER spent a night in our room since.
It takes just as much discipline for the parent(s) as it does for the child. As someone else stated The Baby Whisperer is a great place to start and adapt those philosophies for your own family.

Kimberly - posted on 09/20/2011

Well, I breastfed 4 of my kiddos, none of them slept "through the night" until they were at least 9 months old. Family members were scoffing at me, but none of them nursed their babies past 6 months. I didn't listen to them...b/c I wanted to nurse for as long as possible. Once you stop nursing at nightime, many women find their milk supply decreases. So honestly, just go with your gut. What we do works well for us. I have a futon bed in the nursery, and we leave the door open, so when our youngest (7.5 months) cries, I can hear her immediately. I lay down on the futon and nurse her (it takes only 10 minutes tops), and then put her back in the crib. When she was very young, I would sleep with her. Once she learned to roll over, I started putting her back in the crib so she was safe. Just do what you feel is best...I let our baby fuss herself back to sleep if she gets up before 3/4 AM, after that, I will go in to nurse her. I knew she really didn't need to nurse at 1/2 AM, so I don't nurse her if she wakes at that time. Besides, I'd rather her wake up and nurse then than get up at 6/7 AM and not go back to sleep. This way, I can get all of our older children off to school before she gets up, around 8 AM. So she is sleeping about 8 hours before she wakes for a nursing. I really don't understand why society places such importance on a baby sleeping "through the night." Most adults don't sleep through the night, they get up to use the bathroom or get a drink...why should we expect a baby to do that? Just do what you think is best, don't worry about what anyone else says. Good luck and blessings to you!

Carissa - posted on 09/20/2011

No (to some of the replies I've read), an 11 month old most certainly CAN sleep through the night.
I have heard that by offering water instead of milk, the child will eventually stop bothering to ask for middle of the night feedings.
And remember, it's hard not to go to your child, but helping him or her to sleep through the night serves a greater good: better rest for you and him/her.

Adaljiza - posted on 09/20/2011

Hi dawn .. You can play with him more
During the day
And by the time bedtime comes around he will be tired..
2 you can put some
Cereal in the last
Milk before bedtime ..
3 you can also not pick
Him up as soon as he starts to cry .. He might just need his pacifier and he will
Go right back to
Sleep

Shelly - posted on 09/20/2011

I don't know if anyone suggested this yet, but if there is one thing I would do, it would be to put your baby down for naps and at night while he is still awake. Yes, he will fuss for a while each time, but within a few days he will learn to put himself to sleep. And once this starts happening, he will learn to put himself back to sleep if he wakes up in the night.

I started babysitting a one year old last spring who wanted to be rocked to sleep for every nap, and was waking up 2-3 times every night. I started putting her down for naps while she was awake, and yes, she fussed for the first week, but then she settled down quickly. Now she goes to sleep so easily. I told her mom to do the same at night, and if she woke up at night to go to her, reassure her, but not pick her up or nurse her. Within a few weeks she was sleeping through the night.

Being sleep-deprived doesn't do your family any good. I was there with my second child. "If Momma ain't happy, no one ain't happy". You can train your child to sleep through the night.

Brittny - posted on 09/20/2011

Routine is the key. Same thing everynight. Try giving your baby a bottle of water instead of nursing. This will get them to realize that they won't get the 'good stuff' if they wake up and eventually go back to sleeP and stop waking up. My 11 month old sleeps from 8-5/6. Sometimes he wakes up at three sometimes at 11. Most things you read will tell you at six months babies no longer need a nighttime feeding. My son doesn't talk a bottle at all anymore. Do what is best for you and your little one.

Donna - posted on 09/20/2011

I have a 2 1/2 year old that is difficult to get to sleep and wakes up at 4 and then 5:30 almost every day. I hate doing CIO but have done it in the past and it gets him back on track but he is really not responding this time. (I don't really leave for that long so maybe that is why). I am at my wits end....not to highjack a post but anyone out there with a "baby" this old with issues?

Rebecca - posted on 09/20/2011

This may be unpopular after reading all of the other posts but i truly believe that routine is what works. We sleep trained our son at 7 months because he was waking up every hour every night and both my husband and I were exhausted. He has slept through the night since. He was breast fed until 1 year old but he did not feed in the night from about 6 months when we started solid foods. Now at 2.5 years he is a bright happy boy and loves to go to bed at night after his story and time spent with both Mamma and Papa'. We follow the same routine every night so he knows that it is bedtime. It took only 3 days for him to learn to settle himself at bedtime and he wakes up in the morning and sings or talks until we are ready to get him. He has never slept in our bed. I used the sleep training method whereby I allowed him to cry for about 10 mins then went into give him a cuddle..as soon as he stopped crying I put him down again, said goodnight and left the room. Then I waited 15 minutes before going in to him. I added 5 minutes each time. The first night he took about 30 mins to settle and I had to go in to him only twice in the night. The second night he settled straight away then woke 3 times in the night and the third night he settled himself without crying and did not wake at all in the night. I am very happy I did this as it really turned our lives around. It is not for everybody though and you have to decide what is best for you and your family. Good luck

Janice - posted on 09/20/2011

We decided to stop co-sleeping/ night nursing around 9/10 months. At that point my daughter was nursing before bed at 8pm and sleeping about 3 hours in her crib. Then she was waking and nursing and coming into our bed for the remainder of the night. Typically she would then wake 1-2x and nurse. But then she started waking up a lot (every 1-2 hours) and wanted to crawl around and play. She learned to crawl at 9 mo. and wanted to practice I guess ;) So we had to do something because co-sleeping was not working. I started with weaning from night feeds first. My daughter stayed in our bed but I didn't nurse her I just cuddled her when she woke up. It took a few nights but she stopped looking to nurse but she was still waking up needing comfort or crawling around. When she was no longer nursing at night we started making her spend the whole night in her crib. When she cried I would go in and comfort her but I wouldn't nurse her. I tried not to take her out of her crib, I would hug her when she was standing and rubbed her back and hummed while she laid down. If she was really upset I would take her out and cuddle and rock her in the chair in her room. It took about a week for her to start sleeping through the night.

I'm very happy we sleep trained her and I do believe it is less traumatic to stay and comfort them rather than just leave them to cry alone. Some people don't mind waking in the night and that's their choice, but 11 month old doesn't need to eat during the night and they do need to get sleep so they have energy for new skills like walking :). So I think if you are ready to sleep train her then do it.

Ashley - posted on 09/20/2011

I agree with fit2bme. It is important for a child to know that mom/dad are there for them when they need them. It's alsi very important to have a routine. My 2 year old daughter(whom I breast fed till 14months old) has an issues getting to sleep now because I let her sleep wheb she wanted. We now have a routine that works wonders. She skeeps through the night unless she is sick. However I still cant leave her before she starts to drift off or she gets up. I think it's wonderful that you're trying t get routine that works for you and your baby's needs. Best of luck, stick to what you decide and dont sway or change it. I read to my daughter, she loves it. She gwts one short story than loves nigh night.

Aurora - posted on 09/20/2011

I wouldn't try to sleep train an 11 month old. Enjoy this time with your baby. They are in school before you know it.

Dorthea Mztee - posted on 09/20/2011

i totally agree, set a schedule for yourself and your child. set a bedtime, make sure you stay consistent with that bedtime no matter what. and stay firm do not give in. it's hard and it take patients, but eventually after a while it will become easier and you will be able to have you time.

Simone - posted on 09/20/2011

I miss the days of worrying about sleeping through the night...mine slept through the night fairly early..I worried about it alot with my first born and I found myself getting angry when she didnt sleep through the night..with the second and third I did not worry as much...babies have their pattern of development...just like you cant walk train or talk train a baby..I believe they sleep on their own when they are ready...