Whats wrong with teenage mums?

Toni - posted on 06/14/2009

ha ha rant over!

Clare - posted on 06/14/2009

wow!!!! you just stole the words out of my mouth! fantastic!

Toni - posted on 06/14/2009

I was 1 month shy of being a teenage pregnancy statistic. but wouldnt have cared if I was, i was ready to have kids when I was 13. I have a husband, own my home, car and we both work full time, but non of these materialistic things matter when it comes to having children (the job obviously does!)

Its the older generation that stereotype teenage mothers. in other cultures it is the 'norm' to be married at 12 and children not long after. I think, especially in Leeds, there are alot of teenage 'dole bums' that have children, but there are also ALOT of older women with young children that cannot control them. If your 35, if you drive a BMW, own a house and have velour tracksuit bottoms on with uggs and take your kids to starbucks on a saturday this automatically makes you a good parent in the eyes of society. but if your 16, live in a council estate, still go to school, this deems you a bad parent. None of these things say anything about the way the child is being brought up. If you love your child with all of your heart and will do anything to enable him/her than what the hell has age got to do with it? But i also think if you are going to have children, support it yourself, dont expect us tax payers to do it for you.

I know of a 15 year old who is one of the most wonderful mothers I have met. I have taken my children to play groups where i have met older parents who leave their children to hit and kick others, and no body bats an eye lid, but if the mother of this child was 16, people would judge her and say she is a bad mom. whether you are 15 or 45 it is bloody difficult to be a parent, in the end thats what we are here for and when it happens you can only do your best and I personally do not think age is as much of a factor as it is made out to be.

All mothers (and dads) deserve recognition for the hard work they put in to their children, not to be judged on their age and status.

Clare - posted on 06/14/2009

Quoting Theresa:

ive had a baby at the age of 16 and it wasnt 4 money or a house coz im 17 nw and im still livin with my parents but it aint fair u saying that teenagers want a baby so they can get a house or money,teenagers want a baby because they wanted a baby and they want 2 see wot is like 2 become a parent yeah some people will have kids and they dnt want them in the end but thats there problem not our i love my little girl 2 bits and i wouldnt change her 4 the world and i had her out of love

sorry im not saying that at all think i got my words muddled. what i ment was that if some mums do choose to have a baby just so they can have a house that is wrong i dont think they should have a baby just get a house and im sure not many women do that anyway, thats the best way to have a baby out of love, at the end of the day it dont matter where you live what money you have as long as you and your baby are happy it shouldn't matter on the age thats my opinion anyway

Theresa - posted on 06/14/2009

ive had a baby at the age of 16 and it wasnt 4 money or a house coz im 17 nw and im still livin with my parents but it aint fair u saying that teenagers want a baby so they can get a house or money,teenagers want a baby because they wanted a baby and they want 2 see wot is like 2 become a parent yeah some people will have kids and they dnt want them in the end but thats there problem not our i love my little girl 2 bits and i wouldnt change her 4 the world and i had her out of love

Diane - posted on 06/14/2009

You and your partner are the exception not the rule. I was a young mother 19 and married and we change so much between that age and 25 we find sometimes we grow away from our partners and we are trying to grow up ourselves but we have babies too, so babies raising babies isn't always the best. Learn grow and succeed so that you can give your child more than you had

Clare - posted on 06/14/2009

Quoting Lydia:

I have to admit guilt at the occassional mocking of younger mums - not as an age thing but more specifically those we came to know as the 'black baby brigade'. When we went back to stay in the UK for a few years there were groups of teenage mums pushing their babies around all the time (most of which were white girls with black babies - not an issue just an amusing observation). There seemed to be a mentality that having a baby was an easy way to get your own apartment handed to you by the social welfare system - and that was the problem.

It was the reason that many of them seemed to be having a baby not the fact that they had one. I guess for me its more of a mental age thing than a physical age one - I just feel that having a baby for any other reason than having a baby is irresponsible. There will always be exceptions to the rule and this is just my view - not right, not wrong just mine. I also keep my opinion to myself and would shrink at the idea of having a go at someone (especially someone I dont know) because there belief doesnt align with mine.

i completley agree with you on the getting pregnant to have a house i think that is so wrong and unfair on the child me n my partner had a baby out of love we dont one no money of any1 you gott survive on your own not rely on others to give you money thats like being a kid again being looked after by your parents (ofcourse theres an except)

Linda - posted on 06/14/2009

There is nothing at all wrong with teenage mum's,,,I had my Daughter when i was 21 and from the age of 10 my Daughter suffered ovulation pains when she was 12 she had her first cyst removed from her ovary and then at 15 she was back in again to have another cyst removed they also found an underlying infection in her womb and she was on antibiotics for 3 months,,,the problem never went away and was back in at 17 to be told go home learn to live with the pain and keep taking the pain killers or we remove your ovaries,,,we ended up back at the hospital 12 weeks later to be told she was 6 weeks pregnant now she is a Brilliant mum to 2 beautiful Daughters and at the age of 23 with 2 Daughters aged 5 and 2 I have to say shqe copes Better than some of the older Motheers out there ..So well done all you Teenage Mum's!!!!!!

Hayley - posted on 06/14/2009

most teenage mums think that it is fun untill they are up all night with a screamin baby and it wears off that they never wanted it in the first place.
they are not mentally or phyically ready to have children

Hayley - posted on 06/14/2009

i was 18 when i fell pregnant and i use to get funny looks of people in the shops and that so i stopped going out i dont think it is a good idea to have children if you are under the age of 18 and alot of younger mums these days are only doin it for the money i tink the baby bonus should be stopped to anyone under the age of 18 as i think it is only makin these young girls fall pregnant in the first place

Lydia - posted on 06/14/2009

I have to admit guilt at the occassional mocking of younger mums - not as an age thing but more specifically those we came to know as the 'black baby brigade'. When we went back to stay in the UK for a few years there were groups of teenage mums pushing their babies around all the time (most of which were white girls with black babies - not an issue just an amusing observation). There seemed to be a mentality that having a baby was an easy way to get your own apartment handed to you by the social welfare system - and that was the problem.



It was the reason that many of them seemed to be having a baby not the fact that they had one. I guess for me its more of a mental age thing than a physical age one - I just feel that having a baby for any other reason than having a baby is irresponsible. There will always be exceptions to the rule and this is just my view - not right, not wrong just mine. I also keep my opinion to myself and would shrink at the idea of having a go at someone (especially someone I dont know) because there belief doesnt align with mine.

Mel - posted on 06/14/2009

nothing at all! most of the time as long as the mother is ready to commit to looking after a child. i had mine at 18 too and i was ready :)