When do kids stop wetting the bed?

[deleted account] ( 211 moms have responded )

My daughter is 4 years and still wears a nappy at night i have tried everything to get her off nappies but all efforts have failed. i have tried waking her up at night it has to be like 3 to 4 times in one night i then noticed that when is time to wake up she would still be tired. and i sometimes dont wake up then she wets the bed. what should i do am really depressed.

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Brandi - posted on 01/30/2011

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My oldest son is almost 10 and still wets the bed every night. We have tried alarms, medication (not suggested), waking him up 3-4 times a night, limiting liquids, rewards (stickers, toys, money) just about everything. I was told that he had a sleeping disorder, so we had that tested (wrong). The best advice I was ever given was, "when they are ready, they will stop". So my suggestions is, use a waterproof mattress cover and use pullups/goodnights/underjams or something of the sort.

[deleted account]

All kids and their bodies are different. If you are waking her that many times a night.... she is NOT ready. Do yourself a favor and keep her in a pull up or night time diaper and just let her body mature for a while.

My girls weren't out of night time pull ups til 4.5 and were still wetting the bed on occasion (got less and less as they got older) til 8. My son is not quite 3 and has been dry through the night for several months.

Like I said... EVERY kid is different. ;)

Delta - posted on 01/28/2011

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I had the same issue with my son. I took him to a pediatric urologist. They told me that normally they will grow out of it. They also said that our bodies release a hormone at night that signals our kidneys to slow the production of urine. Sometimes children do not produce enough of this hormone until they get older. They can prescribe that hormone by mouth or nasal spray, but I think they will only do that when the child is older. I would say just be patient with her. Limit her liquid intake a few hours before bed. I was also informed that caffiene and anything with red or blue dye can be a bladder irritant. This will cause the bladder to contract and contribute to bed wetting. I hope this helps. Put a pull up on her, love on her, and tuck her in at night. Don't stress over it. It could be worse.

Becky - posted on 01/28/2011

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I was 10 when I stopped wetting the bed.. I always felt so bad about it and thought something was wrong with me. I could only sleep over with the kids across the street because their son was my age and was still wetting the bed but other then that no sleepovers for me.. Just give her time and let her know its not her fault.

Kathy - posted on 02/06/2011

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My daughter wet the bed until she was 7 and my son until he was 13. They are both extremely deep sleepers. We tried everything except meds, which I didn't want to do. We did alarms, and waking them in the night, and restricting fluids, etc. The doctors said they were both fine. It wasn't a behavior problem, or a physical problem-- just a maturity issue. As the pediatrician kept saying "this isn't a medical problem, it's just a laundry problem." We had them in pull-ups until they didn't fit anymore, then we got absorbent cloth pads for the bed like they use in hospitals. We stopped any negative talk about it, in fact we stopped any talk about it at all, and let it really be just a laundry problem. Sleepovers were reserved just for the few close friends who knew about the issue.
They both grew out of it in their own time, and no one was happier than they were! I don't think we could have forced it to happen any faster. So my advice is lots of love and understanding, absolutely no negativity, let them help with the laundry when they are old enough, and lots and lots of patience.

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Tiffany - posted on 02/06/2011

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My son is 3 1/2 and made the decision on his own that he was ready to be out of pull ups at night about a month ago. Before that he was wearing pull ups and the 3 days prior to the decision no night time peeing, We make him go to the bathroom before bed, he isnt allowed any water after 6 and can have a small glass of milk up until 7 (bedtime is usually 8). He has had 1 accident but wears plastic pants over his underwear. I always heard people say that when the child is ready they will tell you and thats exactly what mine did. Give your daughter time and just try to get the schedule of limited liquids which helps a lot. I also had a friend who put underwear on than a pull up over so their child felt the underwear without the noisey plastic pants but still had the safety with the pull up

Belinda - posted on 02/06/2011

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My oldest, now almost 8, wore pull ups until he'd almost finished his first year at school (so he was almost 6 and a half). I battled with him, but got nowhere. He was really a deep sleeper and just didn't get the 'signals' when he needed to, and he'd not wake at all, no matter how wet and/or cold he was, until morning.



Some just take longer than others, mine did, but he's none the worse for it now. Will be interesting to see how my Miss 16 months handles it, but no matter how slow or quick she picks it up, I won't be stressing and beating myself up about it. She will get it at some point, just like they all do.



Stay patient, it will come to her all in good time...good luck :-)

Elizabeth - posted on 02/06/2011

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hey no worries mine is 5 and a half i had to get the matress cover she still wets the bed occasionally i red in a pamplet at the doctors office that sometimes the bladder doesnt mature with the child just give it time afterall she is only 4

Diana - posted on 02/06/2011

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I haven't run into that problem but try a few things here
1. stop her drinking like 3 hrs b/4 bedtime. if you have tried that then
2. putting her in pull ups and every 2 hrs wake her up and have her go to the bathroom. or
3. set an alarm and have her wake up to it and go to the bathroom. If you have tried these then ask your Dr's child for help.

Rachel - posted on 02/06/2011

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I was such a deep sleeper than I never did "outgrow" it. When I was 12, my parents had me evaluated (I was normal), and they got a "Wee alarm." I quit having to wear pull-ups within a week.

Dali - posted on 02/06/2011

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My daughter will be 6 this may...I still have not seen a dry diaper...I used to wet until i was 9...but you get rubber sheets which u can put under her bed sheet....that way the matress keeps dry! It is a lot of work...i tried it and switched back to diapers! lol

Vandana - posted on 02/06/2011

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Make sure that she goes to the toilet just before she sleeps.Make that a habit.At four she should be sleeping through but maube you can wake her uo once in the middle of the night and relieve herself.

Limpo - posted on 02/06/2011

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My twins are five noe and this is what helped me...I didn't give them fluids after 5pm the go to bed at 7pm..it worked for me- note it also depends on what time you put your Daughter to bed.

Jodie - posted on 02/06/2011

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All children are different and they stop in there own time. One thing to do is to give a drink hour before bed. And make sure she goes to the toilet before going to bed. My son was five before he stopped wearing a nappy to bed. And I have a 4 year old son who turned 4 this year and still's wear's a nappy. As I said in there own time.

Angie - posted on 02/06/2011

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DDAVP. You need a prescription from your doctor for it. I work with kids and we have 7 and 8 year olds still wetting the bed. In these cases we try to limit fluid intake after 6pm, wake them at 10pm and 2 pm. It doesn't take very long for them to only need the 2pm wake-up call, and withing 2-4months we see a great improvement. Best of luck. She'll get it, just be patient and supportive.

Sara - posted on 02/06/2011

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My son is 3 and fully potty trained. All kids are different, that is the only thing you can absolutely be sure of. Here is what we did.

1. NO drinks starting at the hour before she goes to bed.
2. Go potty whether she feels the need to or not. That being the last thing she does.
3. Wake her up to start about 1-2 hours after she goes to sleep for maybe a month. (some people will say not to, but it worked for us.

My sons bed time is 8, and once it got to where we could wait till 12 to wake him, we pretty much quit completely waking him. Occasionally I will go in his room, rub his head to let him know I am there, talk to him, ask him if he needs to potty, if yes, I carry him to the toilet, if not, I kiss him and tell him if he needs to go, then he can get up and go himself whenever he needs to. Hope all of these wonderful advice help you hun, and don't be depressed, be blessed, some people will never know the joys and woes of being a mommy or daddy!

Fiona - posted on 02/06/2011

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interesting how this is on here now as my 7 year old daughter has bed wetting issues. We were told by the paed that having her in pull ups, underwear or anything would hinder her training so she sleeps au natural under her jammies.
we were also told that most kids are night trained around age 6 and if not that is the age when one can begin to investigate the reasons why. there can be any number of reasons including body maturity.
in my daughter's case it could be a physical issue to do with her bladder and she is having some tests done. she was also put on a medication as she was wet 6 out of 7 days/week.
we had her off the meds and she was okay for about 3 weeks but then began wetting again so back on the meds until the test are done and the results are in. I wouldn't recommend meds for everybody but they were needed in her situation and have let her be dry at night which she is very proud of.
we did buy a pee pad from wal-mart which is much like the ones used in the hosptial with the blue backing. she feels comfortable sleeping with it and we have the luxury of the pad containing her accidents so we are not needing to do laundry daily.
my daughter also has difficulty with sensation of need to pee in other words she doesn't always know she has to pee until she has to go immediately even during the day and it has nothing to do with being too occupied with playing.
the best thing I eould suggest is to not make a huge negative fuss about it as this will have a negative impact on how she feels about herself.

Molly Fullbright - posted on 02/06/2011

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My oldest son wet the bed till he was 11. Dr said small bladder. my youngest wet the bed til 7. it was weird they both stopped wetting the bed about the same time. I was a bed wetter as a child too till i was 11. Dont make a big deal about it and dont wake her up at night. it will stop. And no one is happier than the kids. we can now have sleep overs and i dont worry about them going to sleep overs. My oldest boy still wont spend the night away from the house. I think he felt so bad about it that he has never wanted to sleep away from the house. I changed a lot of sheets. I never made them wear pull ups but they would get up change clothes and put a towel over it and go back to bed. Talk to your pediatrician and set your mind at ease

Jen - posted on 02/06/2011

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My oldest just turned 5 on Friday and still has an occasional accident. My four year old took forever to potty train but went from pullups full time to not even at night...each kid is different. Cut down on fluids about an hour before bed. I make mine go to the bathroom two or three times in the hour before bed too, but if she is a deep sleeper, then she may have accidents for a while. There is nothing wrong with wearing them to bed.

Zelina - posted on 02/06/2011

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Import is do not give child drink after 6pm then the child wont pee in bed

Brittany - posted on 02/06/2011

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My son is 11 and he still wets the bed. I talked to doctors and they have told me that sometimes wetting the bed happens when he child is not getting enough calcium. I usually give him 2 calcium pills a few hours before bed and that usually does the trick. Try talkin to your doctor about the calcium and see what he/she tinks.

Jessica - posted on 02/06/2011

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My daughter was also wearing nappies to bed at four (she was the youngest and I had not had this experience with the older ones). I decided to downplay the situation (the pull-on nappies worked best, as they were like underwear rather than diapers). She became more confident, especially when she learned that she was "growing faster than her bladder" and she stopped night time wetting shortly after that.

I do recommend making certain there isn't an actual medical problem, but I'm against drug solutions, as this is bound to have negative side effects, physical as well as emotional and psychological.

Faye - posted on 02/06/2011

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I have two daughters that still wet to bed at 6 and 10. It's not every night but several times a week. I like many other parents, went through everything! We have been to the dr's many times about it and they always say the same thing. "The will outgrow it". Two of the dr's we saw had children themselves that wet to bed until they were 10 and 12. I have discovered that the best thing to do is just support them and be very encouraging when they do stay dry. My 10 yr old has decreased the number of nights that she's wetting so I'm hopeful that we're getting to the end of it with her. They have pullups that they wear so they don't soak their beds every time.

Janette - posted on 02/06/2011

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She only4!! My son is 7 and ocassionally still wets the bed--- Try no drinks before bedtime She will grow out of it. Doctors say all kids stop wetting the bed at different ages so just relax .)

Janet - posted on 02/06/2011

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Unfortunately, there are some kids who just can't wake up until they are a little older. The muscle that causes us towake when we need to go is just not quite developed or strong enough sometimes until much later like 10-12 years old. It's something that is greatly embarrassing to them of course. So, the worse thing you could do is punish her or make a big deal about it. She will get to the point of waking up, but it may be a while. There is a machine that is suppose to help but not sure if it really works. Right now she needs encouragement that it will happen. I'm afraid that there is no immediate solution. It's something that needs understanding until such time that her body catches up and is able to get her awake. Sorry there's not better news.

[deleted account]

Try not to give her liquids for about two hours before bed time. It may give you some insight on how often she goes pee and the amount at the same time. If you can keep tabs on that for a few nights it may help out, or it is just possible that her body isn't ready yet. But definately keep an eye on how much she drinks through out the day. Good luck,

Hayley - posted on 02/06/2011

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Night time muscle control is **totally** biological. There are kids of age 8 or 10 who still wet at night. There is nothing "wrong" here. Their bodies just aren't ready. You must be patient with her, and tell her to be patient with herself. If she has a sleepover, try the "underjams" type nighttime underpants, so she won't be embarrassed by it (children can be mean and not understand that it's not "being a baby" that does this). Seriously. Just wait for her body to develop nighttime control. It will happen, but it will take *longer* if you make her stressed over it.

Janice - posted on 02/06/2011

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Have little talks during the day with messages explaining how proud you are of her when she does go to the bathroom---do not express shame in any way. Another thing that is important----observe what really upsets her and work with her about explaining her feelings about her day. When something is not worked out during the day, we sleep deeper to suppress our feelings.

Dina - posted on 02/06/2011

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There is no set age. my daughter stopped at a very late age. My daughter is a very heavy sleeper and she would get very relaxed and thats when it would happen. just this pas year she stopped. she is 11. but its not uncommom, she did have a few friends that still wore pull-ups. if it continues you can take her to the Dr. it could be that her bladder is not fully developed. but I wouldnt worry.

Julie - posted on 02/06/2011

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My son is 8& and still wets the bed. It's a drag. I talked to a couple pediatricians about it and it has nothing to do with waking them up or cutting off liquids. What it has to do with is the level of deep sleep they fall into. They get so relaxed that everything literally relaxes. So what they recommended was the underwater alarm. I have an issue with teaching my child not to sleep deeply, so I've decided to wait until he is more interested in it stopping. That time will come soon I know because there will be embarrassment issues for him. Good luck!

Belinda - posted on 02/06/2011

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My son had night time bed wetting, and after we tried everything I mentioned it to his doctor. Turns out he had (and still has) a sleep disorder. He just can't wake up to go to the bathroom. He's 22 now, and still occasionally has a problem. We never punished for it, and as he got older it became a non-event. He put his sheets and pajamas in the washer and we didn't mention it.

Shannon - posted on 02/06/2011

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Don't let it worry or depress you! Every kids body is different. My son still has problems with bed-wetting, and he is 9. My husband had problems until he was 12. They are both very deep sleepers, and their bladders were/are not mature enough to hold that much all night long. My daughter is 5, and she stopped needing pull-ups by age 3. She can hold it all day, tho, where as my son needs to go every 2 hours! We did ask our Dr. about if there was anything we could do, and all he said was that it is just different bodies, growing/developing at different rates, and to not make him feel that he is bad for wetting the bed, as he is not doing it on purpose, he will grow out of it when his body is ready. Hang in there!!

Pam - posted on 02/06/2011

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i asked my pediatircian about that last month b/c my dtr will be 4 in april and i was getting worried. she told me that it's not an age thing that it was b/c her bladder was still a little immature. my dtr hated wearing night time undies so i told her she had to go 7 nights w/out getting the ntu wet, and now we are on night 2 w/her regular undies. it'll happen, even though you don't think it will...lol.

Cori - posted on 02/06/2011

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my son is almost 6 and still wears pull-ups at night. but she sleeps really hard at night. i figure he will eventually get it. his mind has to catch up to his body.
Dont be depressed by it, she will get up at night when she is ready.

Sarah - posted on 02/06/2011

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you are depressed because your daughter is bedwetting! That is the least of my worries. My 5 year old has autism, cant speak, smears poo, bites himself, has no understanding of language or the world around him. Stop worrying, this is nothing... i wish that was my sons only challenge.

Colleen - posted on 02/06/2011

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Have you had her bladder checked? I had a small bladder when I was a kid and eventually grew out of it, now my son has the same problem, see your doctor about it. Just a suggestion, hope it helps rule out problems.

Carole - posted on 02/06/2011

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The only way way to do that. Is do not give any thing to drink before the bed and that should work. I have done with my kids and it works. I also someone whose kid is only 3. Try that and see what happens

Rose - posted on 02/04/2011

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Stop worrying about it!...kids kidneys dont grow at the same way their bodies grow...be patient...she will out grow wetting the bed eventualy!! The more you try to help her the worst it is.

Mwanaharusi - posted on 02/04/2011

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Oh im so sorry but try to give her dinner very early and no fluids fron 6 o clock, only sips when necessary

Sally - posted on 02/04/2011

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Before I say anything: Have you ever brought your daughter to the child clinic? They have professional people to give you advice and it will not cost you anything as it is provided by the Queensland health if you live here in Australia. I am sure the child health nurses will give you sound advice. This is something that children will develop in time. I always say to myself that it will get better and it always does.

Kristie - posted on 02/04/2011

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She is only 4 years old. Maybe be depressed if she was 10 and still wetting. Some peolpe tell me not to wake them up because her brain will think ever night at the same time it has to pee. As she gets older she will just stop when she is ready. My little boy did when he was 5. Going on 6 now he still has accidents when he is tired. So chin up and just wait, her day will come.

[deleted account]

Let your little girl take her time in this area. I have found that if you leave them, little kids grow up all on their own. Every child has his/her own rhythm and trying to force a sensitive area such as potty training only results in frustration for the parent and trauma for the child. My son has just turned four and resisted potty training for more than a year! Initially I was totally freaked out about it, but in the end gave up trying to force the issue and totally took the heat off him. I eventually read him a book about Potty training that his Aunt bought for him, and only moments later he asked to use the potty and is now using the toilet only two days later! He just decided on his own that he is ready now and it has been so easy! Just give your daughter space and time and she will come around on her own :)

Tracy - posted on 02/04/2011

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Don't be depressed! All kids are different, my son stopped wetting the bed at a young age, where my daughter still does it and she is 3.5 yrs old. Sometimes it helps to cut out fluids early in the evening too...

Marcella - posted on 02/04/2011

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take her from bed dont wake her put her on toilet and turn on the tap that works for my three year old daughter.

Erin - posted on 02/04/2011

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My stepson is 7 (almost 8) and he only stopped wetting the bed a few months ago. We just had him in a pull-up at night. No reason to be depressed, and her seeing that it upsets you isn't the best thing for her. Just remember that she's can't help it, it's out of her control. We still limit liquid after dinner to just a few sips. When he gets mad that the bigger kids can have something to drink at night I give him the option of wearing a pull-up if he wants to drink something. Of course he always says no because he doesn't want to go back to that.

Jennifer - posted on 02/03/2011

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My son who is now 11 was wetting the bed after trying the medication, waking him up, everything. He was a heavy sleeper.I tried chiropractic care and he has been dry since school started in Sept. We started care in July. It really helped him. Yes, some kids grow out of it but if they are heavy sleepers it won't matter if you take them out of pull-ups or not. It just makes more work for you. I would check with a dr. first but then I would see a chiropractor.

Samantha - posted on 02/03/2011

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we are going through the same thing with my 5 and 4 yr old daughters. try not to worry. I have heard it can take until they are ten with some children. We are currently letting our girls go to bed with underwear on, then waking them and taking them to the toilet 3hrs after bed time (before we go to bed). Then we put the nappy on. I figure getting up once in the night won't make them too tired and means I still get enough rest, and gives them the best opportunity to be dry in their nappies as soon as their bodies are ready. If you really feel the need to DO something more, I have heard that chiropractics sometimes helps. It didn't for our kids, but others have had some success.

Cynthia - posted on 02/03/2011

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I was around 10 or so and still wet the bed. I couldn't drink after about 6:00 or 7:00. I also wet when I was afraid and had bad dreams. I quit watching scary movies. I think I had stress issues too-I was a cry baby and now I seem to worry about everything even though I know God works things out for me which helps. I eventually grew out of it. She is still young though. I am 51 and when I drink too much caffeine -you know it's starting all over-I have to keep going to the restroom again or stop drinking so much water and coffee. Don't worry or fuss or get angry with her (it will make it worse I think), just cover her bed pad and/or put her on those cute pull up pampers. Cynthia

Toni - posted on 02/03/2011

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i had the worse troublw with my boy, who is almost 6. we moved and from then on in he said no more nappies so it was almost a nightly occuarance of a wet bed at least once. we took him to the toilet and reduced his drinks at night even got him in the habit of getting up himself and simply getting towels till the morning. this went on for over a year and i always tried to make sure he never saw it as a negative thing simply the act of growing up. it lasted over a year and i have noticed that he is starting to get up in the night for himself. so there is a rainbow at the end.... it has taken awhile but he is really proud of himself and he has done it on his. it is really frustrating but eventually they get it just grin and bear the accidents and help them to understand that they are not alone and that it is easy to deal with and its ok.

Diane - posted on 02/03/2011

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I've found with my kids that would not stop wetting the bed until the diapers were gone. If they were there at all they had no need to wake up and take care of it because they knew they didn't really have to. Once the diapers were gone we had some accidents but it wasn't very long before it stopped because they learned that they had to wake up on their own. Also I have noticed that when my kids were still learning if I told them to wake up if they had to go potty they would usually wake up before it happened but if I didn't say anything they were MUCH more likely not to wake up for it. Good luck.

Gina - posted on 02/03/2011

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I have twin four year olds, both girls, both been day trained for over a year and only one is night trained. We decided to take nappies off her at night at wake her during the night. This did not work, we would wake her at 11pm, dry, take her to loo, wake her at 2 am, wet, take her to loo, wake her at 6am, wet! whats the point she got tired and grumpy and upset. Im also desperate for her to be out of night nappies but it looks like Il have to play the waiting game.

Kylie - posted on 02/03/2011

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some kids take ages to be dry at night, and it's just part of life. many kids are about o start school before they are completly dry at night. my cousin was 12 before he didn't wet the bed at night. if you are really worried talk to your dr about it

Leander - posted on 02/03/2011

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Hi, its a very hard situation- I bet u ask your all the time "is she ever going to stop". I was in the same situation 12 1/2 years ago and i am still asking my self the same question. I was told that bettwetting is not classed as a problem until they are 8 years old and still wetting. My son and i have seen many doctors up until 1 1/2 years ago when they told me "we have tried everything and there is nothing more at this stage we can do". My son has had an ultrasound to make sure he had 2 kidneys and a large enough bladder , everything so OK -thank god, so the doctor told me it was passed down through the family (my mother was a bed wetting until the age of 12 and also my nans brother was a wetter untile the age of 14, so when there is no medical reason for bedwetters they then turn to familly history of wetters and the ages that they stopped wetting, the doctors told me my son would probably stop wetting between the ages of 12 and 14 there abouts. We tried bedwetting alarms, they are good but my son is a very heavey sleeper, there is also medication called Minirin which they dont try on the kids until they are older and pretty much the last resort, it is a ardificial hormone (look it up on the internet).
GOOD LUCK i hope your daughter has dry night very soon.

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