Who has also an early Bedtime (6 to 7) for their teens?

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Liz - posted on 01/30/2013

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A) What has scoliosis got to do with treating an older teen and an adult, which latter the 18 year old is, like most people would treat a 5 year old? You say you put them to bed, which indicates you enforce this bed time. Is there something wrong with their minds also that you would contemplate an action that basically suffocates their individuality? Can't they decide if they are tired and act accordingly? Even if they were to need physical assistance with getting into bed, they can surely decide for themselves and ask for the help at the point they need it?

B) Please don't get all snippy with the ladies on this board. You were the one that chose to couch your question in utterly vague terms, twice in two days. Really, the responses to your first post should have told you that you needed to add more information if you wanted to be taken seriously. We do get time wasters and idiots here who think that it is funny to post ridiculous things just for the hell of it; your posts looked entirely like these because you chose not to include essential facts. I hope this helps you formulate your next post.

Shawnn - posted on 01/31/2013

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Jessica, I also had a very good friend in HS that had scoliosis, and surgery to correct it. She was in physio and a brace for years prior to surgery.

She also competed in gymnastics and basketball. She would have laughed her mother out of the room had the woman even suggested that it was time to call it a day at 6 pm!

You put out a fairly ambiguous statement: "who else has an early bedtime for their teens"...And you got the truthful answers. NO ONE has this early of a bedtime for a teenager! And no one "puts" their teens to bed, unless you live in a very over controlled society that won't even let you breathe without permission.

Now, I may remind my 15 yo that it's getting close to his target shutdown time, and if my 18 yo has a very early shift the next day I MIGHT poke my head into his room if he's still up after 11 pm, but the way I figure it...my 18 yo is an adult, and knows how much or how little sleep he needs to function fully. If he shorts himself, he learns how not to do that next time.

You wanted opinions, you go opinions, but then you got snippy with us because you posed such an ambiguous question that it invited the assumption that you were trolling. You didn't want to share any particular reason as to WHY you force your kids to bed between 6 & 7, but then got even snippier at us because we didn't take into account "special needs"...that you didn't disclose until after you got snippy about the answers!

Boy, if that ain't the pot calling the kettle black...LOL...I don't know what is.

So, I guess my final opinion on the matter is this: If your daughters don't mind the overwhelmingly early limits that you put on their day, then you're fine. But, if you haven't asked their input, and are still arbitrarily enforcing a bedtime that is more appropriate for a 2 yo...that's a bit much, in my opinion.

Liz - posted on 01/30/2013

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Jessica, if your daughters have special needs that make them different from the average 16 and 18 year olds, you should put this in your initial question. Why on earth would you canvas for opinion from people without giving them this essential piece of contextual information?

~♥Little Miss - posted on 01/30/2013

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So yes, for the average teenager, that time frame is not realistic what so ever. You did not mention that your daughters have issues nor have clarified this. You simply stated "who has also an early Bedtime (6 to 7) for their teens?" That needs more clarification if something else is going on.

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Jan - posted on 03/01/2013

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Are you trolling? lol In any case, I send my girls (1, 5, 7) to bed at 7:50. They have time to get their pjs, brush their teeth, and read. At 8:20, we talk and say prayers. It's lights out by 8:30. Works out great, they wake up on their own at 6:30am. When I was a teenager I went to sleep at 9- 9:30. Any earlier would be ridiculous.

Jodi - posted on 02/27/2013

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And they BOTH have scoliosis?
Not to mention that at some point she said her daughters are 16 and 18, but her profile says 16 and 20. Lots of different things that simply don't add up. Just saying.

Jodi - posted on 02/27/2013

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Kelly, if you read through the responses, you will see that Jessica had already posted something tridiculous a couple of days before. I can't recall what it was, but let's just say, I do remember it didn't add up.

[deleted account]

I moderate a board somewhere else and we get our share of trolls, but I don't think I've ever seen anyone attacked so strongly over such an innocuous posting before. It seems mean to me. I know my mind didn't immediately go to "troll" when reading the question. It wasn't until after I posted my own response that I went back and read what others had posted. All I can say is "Wow"

[deleted account]

Although mine are now grown and gone, my youngest had an extremely early bed time...7-8 PM I think. It was necessary as she was up at 4 AM every morning to swim. (She was on an Olympic trial path at the time.) Teens need 8 hours of sleep minimum. I think you have to take so many things into consideration when you set a bed time. Teens who have big dreams may have to make sacrifices -- but they shouldn't have to sacrifice their sleep.

Sarah - posted on 02/27/2013

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Wow that is early for a teen! I guess I try to raise my kids preparing them for when they are off on their own. How can the teen participate in school related events? How can the teen have a social life......not that that is huge importance, but in some ways it is. I would rather my child be taught and have experiences socially while under my roof then when off in college when there are SO many more variables and no adult supervision. Now that does not mean I will allow them to go or do everything, but I feel it is a good way to guide your child in how to make good choices. To me I would also think kids would make fun of my child for having such an early bedtime. Not that that should way a decision, but yet I think I would consider it.

For me I can't imagine how my family's life would function with such an early bedtime. Even my 1 yr old has a later bedtime then that. We eat supper together as a family and that is not until 7 pm usually. My older kids are involved in sports and music, so we are often times attending either a concert or a sporting event in the evenings together as a family. We also live close to several colleges and will often times attend one of their music or sporting events. These are things we enjoy and I can't imagine taking those experiences away due to an early bedtime.

Thomas - posted on 02/27/2013

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I know I am a male I am Not a troll but a respectable father but this is the honest truth .my children were allowed to go out until a respectable time according to their age and maturity obviously when it was dark we wanted to know where they were!.
There was a single mother whom had two children she had been brought up in a strict family atmosphere and when the children came home from school the boy was 17 and the girl was 10 and she sent them to bed as soon as they had their tea which was 5.30 pm and were in bed by 6pm I asked her why she done this and she said they need their sleep I said to her I can appreciate that children need their sleep but a 17 yr old needs socialization with their mates !. but she would not relent to cut a long story short as soon as the boy was 18 he left home and joined the Armed forces!. As Not wanting to come between the family as otherwise the mother was a very good mum when I saw the boy in the street I asked him if he liked going to bed early his answer was no my mum wont let me even go out with my mates. I felt very sorry for the boy but felt helpless to do anything!

Denikka - posted on 01/30/2013

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My 2 and 4 yr olds go to bed at 7pm. They're usually asleep by about 7:30pm. It would take something pretty drastic (like a sever mental disability, or severe physical problems that left my child exhausted) to get me to put my kids. at 16 and 18yrs old, to bed before even 9pm.

Hell, even when my mother was younger than that, (13-15yrs) and she was getting up at 4am to go to figure skating practice for a couple hours before school (after which she had band practice or piano practice, and homework, and whatever else a normal teen does) her bedtime was 10pm.

I honestly can't think of a single person I have ever known that, past the age of 5, maybe 6 (pushing it) who went to bed before 7-8pm on any kind of regular basis (obviously excluding those who now work night shift or other erratic work shifts.)

Liz - posted on 01/30/2013

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I suspect that you've taken good care of your daughters for so long that you've lost sight of the fact that they are on the cusp of adulthood. Unless their physical difficulties are so extreme that they are unlikely ever to leave home, you need now to work with them to allow them to develop whatever degree of autonomy fits their condition. Even if they never leave home, it is vital for their mental and emotional well being that you give them as much control over their own lives and environment as they are able to take.

Sometimes being a parent means that we have to give our children room to make mistakes, such as not getting sufficient sleep. We can be there to support them when they get it wrong, but it isn't up to us to control their lives as adults. They are their own people, not extensions of us.

Jodi - posted on 01/30/2013

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Well, how do you expect a reasonable response if you don't disclose all the information?

~♥Little Miss - posted on 01/30/2013

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I know a girl that had severe scoliosis, to the point where she had to have surgery and major work done. She never had an early bed time. It really doesn't go hand in hand as far as I know. Ask your daughters if they need the extra sleep. See how they do with an 8-9 bed time and take it from there.

Jessica - posted on 01/30/2013

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They need Physio because of their scoliosis. Your right. I did tell you this because I'm tired of all these posts about trolling. Whats wrong with it? AND I did post it because there might be someone interested in a serious conversation without mentioning how ridiculous she thinks this is every other posting

~♥Little Miss - posted on 01/30/2013

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Hell, if they have therapy at 7am every morning, I would be inclined to have an early bed time also. Really, ask your daughters about this. See what they think.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 01/30/2013

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*sigh* IMO it is too early of a bed time. BUT with that being said, it may very well depend on what else is going on with your daughters. I am sure whatever reasons they need physio therapy plays into there daily routines in life. So yeah, that might be a huge determining factor about bed time.

Jodi - posted on 01/30/2013

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And you ask for opinions because you DON'T want us to take your daughters' special needs into account and yet when everyone says it sounds ridiculous, you decide to tell us about the special needs to justify your opinion. Right, I can clearly see how you don't want anyone to consider their special needs.....or your might be trolling ;)

Jessica - posted on 01/30/2013

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Ok. Seems I started the wrong way. Its not that my daughters are disabled. Thats part of the problem. They're together with others their age who of course have other bedtimes. In fact I want a independent opinion without regarding the special needs of my daughters too much.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 01/30/2013

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So then why are you asking? A teenager going to bed at 6-7 pm is not realistic. I mean if your daughters both have some debilitating disease, mentally or physically, that is certainly different. But teenagers typically will not go to bed willingly before it is even dark out.

Jessica - posted on 01/30/2013

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I cant see why everebody thinks putting kids to bed early is strange. My daughters both need physio therapy so they need their rest

Dove - posted on 01/30/2013

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Why did you repost this? I responded on it yesterday (or the day before?)... not sure where it is though 'Little Miss'... threads like to disappear on me all the time.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 01/30/2013

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I have not seen this post before. If someone knows where it is, can you post to it so it will be on the first page? That way we can deal with it. Thanks

~MoD Little Miss~

Liz - posted on 01/30/2013

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There's no way I can take such an idea seriously, especially after this was already posted once a day or so ago. It smacks of trolling.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 01/30/2013

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LOL, is this a joke? A teen would go to bed much later than that. My 6 year old son usually goes to bed between 7:30-8:30 pm.

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