Why is it that everything time my husband holds our baby, she starts crying?

Joanna - posted on 11/13/2009

babies bond with parents differently. My daughter cried with my husband until she was about 3 or 4 months old. Although one major thing is if you are stressed the baby will sense it, so make sure he's relaxed and happy when he holds her.

Tanya - posted on 11/13/2009

relax.......thats the first thing to remember, she won't break! I think its tough for a dad especially a new one and a little girl, theres that whole 'daddys little girl' thing so its supposed to be perfect right? not always. I have found with friends and us that get as much 'face time' as you can even if he is doing stuff around the house put her in the same room and he can either sing or tell her what he's doing, she'll get used to his very different voice have him interact with her, try to sit her at the table during meal times ( I used to put the chair on the table..never leave it unattended of course) that way she'll see the two of you interact and you can both interact with her. If him giving her a bottle is giving you grief put one of your worn shirts between dad and the baby she will pick up your 'smell' and be comforted. If you have a snuggli carrier go for a walk together wilth daddy carrying. Anyway hope these things help, hang in there she'll soon dote on her father!

Sylvia - posted on 11/10/2009

My daughter did the same thing at a similar age. A lot of babies do. It hurts Dad's feelings, but it's normal and temporary. She is totally Daddy's girl now (she's 7).

Krystal - posted on 11/10/2009

My 8mth old son is really "mummy" clingy at the moment. I think its his age tho. Ben can get him out of bed in the morning and soon as Wil catches sight of me he fair climbs across bens chest with his arms out screaming. I know it upsets ben a little tho he tries not to show it. But its not just with him, its everyone at the moment. The other day ben got home from work and wil held his arms out to him - you shouldve seen the look on bens face xx

Patty - posted on 11/10/2009

My son who is 6 months now, did the same thing with my husband. I noticed that my husband would want to cuddle with him not realizing that his stubble from his chin was rubbing on him. Once I pointed that out he seemed to be okay.

Loretta - posted on 11/01/2009

We had this same problem!! Someone recommended having my husband do things with me--like stand next to me and talk to her while I changed her diaper--so she got used to the idea of him while I was meeting her needs. Then we slowly switched so he changed the diaper while I stood next to him and talked to her. Eventually he could change her diaper without me there and now he plays with her and carries her around without a problem. She still wants only me when she's melting down for any reason!

Joanne - posted on 10/30/2009

I am having the same problem. Our daughter is 7 months old and SCREAMS every time my husband looks at her, touches her, picks her up...anything. She has reacted this way from day one. I don't understand it either. He is gentle and sweet w/ her. My husband gets home from work @3:15 every day and most often has full interaction w/ the girls the whole way until bedtime. I keep telling him it is a phase and she will grow out of it.... I feel SO BAD for him. All I have to do is touch her and she calms right down and will even smile. But I often take advantage of him being w/ the girls and get stuff done. As a result, it makes the remainder of the day stressfull for all of us. The only thing else I can think to try is for him to actually minimize his interaction w/ her and then maybe she will want him---try a little reverse phsycology!

Gabriela - posted on 10/30/2009

Sometimes babies a scared by men because they are "rough" to them. Or very insecure when they carry them. But she must remember his voice, she heard it while she was in the womb. Eventually she will get use to him and start to feel comfortable.

My husband a I decided that since I breastfeed, he would create a bond with our baby boy by bathing him every day and putting him to sleep. And it has worked! But he also needs to compromise and spend time with her, at a reasonable hour. And I agree with Theresa: she will grow and forget about it, is the DAD that needs your support to feel better, cause he is making a great effort to care for his family.

Jennifer - posted on 10/30/2009

my son did the same thing he grew out of it now he reaches for my husband when he get home, my son did it because im a stay at home mom with him and my husband worked alot so he just was not use to him she will grow out of it. also just make him hold her even if she is crying at lest for a few min the more time they spend together the better

Tara - posted on 10/30/2009

Thank you everyone! I told him that when he can be around for the 7 o'clock feeding that I will start having him feed her a bottle. He does try, but with him working on our house so much trying to get it finished enough to move in, he has been unable to spend quality time with her. I am praying things will definitely get better once we are moved in to our house, and he can be around more.

Katelyn - posted on 10/30/2009

get your husband to get on the floor with her with her toys .. talking softly .. he needs to get down to her level.. and if she still cries mamybe you should just leave them alone together they will get used to each other in no time... and are you breast feeding maybe try pumping a bottle and letting him feed her everyonce and a while if she is hungry she will eat no matter who is holding her.. my youngest is the same way it took a while for her to warm up to my husband now at 9 mths she is a daddy sucky just like my 3 yr old

Theresa - posted on 10/30/2009

Is she your first? Maybe he is a bit nervous yet? It isnt anything personal. Try letting him interact from a distance a bit more. Lower his tone of voice. Smile more. Some little quirk in your daughter is reacting to his tone of voice, tense body or something similar. She will out grow it. Most importantly be reasuring to daddy.

Jessie - posted on 10/30/2009

hey try 2 get him 2 interact with her more than he does now becos i had the same prob becos he was always workin, maybe try lettin him bath her feed her but just keep tryin...is it just him or every1 except u ?