Does anyone else have a problem finding time to get everything done?

Cassandra - posted on 04/09/2010 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I am a self employed childrens photographer. I thought that it would be so nice and easy working from home. but I can't find time to do anything! I am home 24-7 my business is not growing or getting work done, my house is still a mess and my husband thinks that I am just doing nothing but sitting around when I am home. How does he expect me to sit down and be doing work wile a have a 2 year old running a muck!! Every time I sit down to start doing my work my baby boy needs something. My husband does not understand that when I work I need to just sit and work in order for things to get done. and I need a different time to clean the house and play with the baby. Does anyone else have a problem finding time to get everything done? How do I get him to understand that it takes alot of time to have a successful business?!

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You might try finding four other moms that are in the same situation in your area. You could offer to watch all their children on Mondays. The next woman could watch all of them on Tuesdays and so on. This would give you four days out the week to work and your little one can play with other children. Even if you found one other person, you might be able to tag team two days out of the week.

[deleted account]

Time management is key! I own my own graphic design/printing business and started it 2 years ago when my daughter was 4. I used to work when she napped and then work nights. Now I have "quiet time" when she plays quietly or watches a movie 1-2 hrs. during the day - so that gives me time to check email and respond to calls. I also decided not to beat myself up if the house wasn't spotless and take the weekends to catch up on laundry. My husband does the dishes most of the time, since I do all the cooking. It's definitely a juggling act, but I enjoy the flexibility of working from home.

Roz - posted on 04/09/2010

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I work as an Independant Business owner with AmeriPlan (discount health, dental, id theft, legal etc.) I can set my hours though. I have called photographers and they've said on their voicemail what their business hours are and when they will call back (usually next biz day). Is that an option?

For your husband he thinks you have it cushy because he has no idea what you do every day. He does have a hard job so it's easy for him to think that everyone else has it easier than him. Try to educate him because he truly doesn't know. If all else fails you can leave your kid with him ALL day (even poss all night) without you there to run in and save the day lol and then he will know what you do all day :).

It's nice for him to have his job because he can come home and stop working (sort of...) But your work never stops. If your baby gets up at night is it your job to get him or your hubby's or both of you? Usually its the Mom because that is just what we do. So he gets to come home and relax for a bit and feel ok about it wheras if we even thought about relaxing we'd feel guilty looking at all the laundry and kitchen messes lol!

Our hubby's need to know that we do work very hard. Just because we are not in a cubicle answering phone calls and working on the computer doesn't mean we don't work, and just because we are at home doesn't mean we don't work too. You are going to need to educate him (nicely of couse) because he'll keep brining it up until he understands lol!

I think there is a website if you google something like "Cost of a stay at home mom" or salary of a stay at home mom. If we were to hire someone for everything we do every day it's something like over $100K a year. So sometimes putting things in that perspective may help him.

I just know if you come at it from an angle of trying to understand things from his point of view rather than accusing or fighting about it (not saying you are doing this but just for others who might read this too) that he will understand.

That being said, my hubby really stepped it up after the second child and I've heard this from many other moms who said the same thing. It's like they get an automatic maturity boost lol!

Cassandra - posted on 04/09/2010

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My husband is in the NYPD so he thinks he just has a hard job and my life is cushy. More things got done when I was working for someone else! So he is gone 5 days a week 12-14hr a day. The other thing he doesnt understand is that I don't have a 9-5. When someone calls I have to answer, I don't have set hr!! Hopefully your suggestion will work. What do you do?

Roz - posted on 04/09/2010

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Oh man...yes those of us who have businesses know EXACTLY what you are talking about!!! It is really hard because when we have kiddos running around we constantly have to stop and start what we are doing and that will make whatever we were doing take MUCH longer.



What does your hubby do for work? If you can sit down with him and let him know beforehand that you don't plan to argue or get in a fight or anything but that you know that he is concerned about what you are doing and that you do want to find a solution with him. You can also ask him how would his work fare if he took your 2 year old to work (this always gets them because men aren't great multi-taskers in general and they know it won't work well at all lol)



If you make it about him and how he can help you then that will help so that you guys don't end up getting into a fight. While you are doing this though you explain to him what your typical day is like and don't do a summary by any means. Go through everything you do every day and at the end ask him what he thinks you can do.



If he is a sane person he will recognize that you have to tend to a child all day long, work on your business, work on the house, cook, etc. and he will realize that you just don't have time to do EVERYTHING. But at the same time he might just have a good solution too. If you look to him for help, he might just be able to help...but it will do more since you will be validating his feelings.



Hopefully this will work with your hubby...it did with mine. After our second was born a few months ago I started working my biz again and of couse the house got messy and blah blah so I described to him what I do all day and asked for how I can improve. Needless to say he now understands what I do all day and why the house is just as messy as when he left in the morning, but I've been cleaning all day lol!



Let us know how it works out and if you found a way to get through to him :).

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