going back to work...1st baby

Laura - posted on 07/16/2009

I went back to work when my daughter was 11 weeks old. We put her in a daycare that was right by my work that came highly recommended. It turned out to be the worst mistake we could've made. Not only did I have to go through the transition of going back to work after 12 weeks maternity leave, but I had to leave my baby for the first time, break her from breast feeding at the breast and leaving her with complete and total strangers. After 4 months we couldn't handle it anymore and she is with her dad at home full time and he works part time nights after getting laid off before she was born. We realized we are NOT daycare parents. Not to mention for the custodial care that she got we were paying extremely too much money, I even had a discount through my employer. I agree that daycare is good for socialization with other children and that is the ONLY thing that she isn't getting right now. However, she has been early on all her developmental milestones. We watched the late development of all the other babies in the infant room there and didn't understand why. Then we started making surprise visits and realized they were not doing anything developmental with them at all. Sometimes children are much better off at home with a parent.

JEANNETTE - posted on 07/16/2009

I KNOW IT WILL BE REALLY HARD LEAVING YOUR BABY BUT IT ALL DEPENDS WHO IS WATCHING THE BABY. THE FIRST IMPORTANT PERSON IS YOUR FAMILY. SO SEE IF SOMEONE IN YOUR FAMILY CAN WATCH THE BABY. IF YOU DONT HAVE ANYONE THEN PUT HIM IN A DAYCARE REALLY CLOSE TO YOUR JOB. I PUT MY SON IN DAYCARE WHEN HE WAS 3MOS. I WAS SCARIED BUT IT ALL TURNED OUT REALLY GOOD. IN THE BEGINGING I ALWAYS CALLED THE DAYCARE TO CHECK UP ON HIM. YOU SHOULD DO THAT ALL THE TIME. SO YOU WONT HAVE TOO MUCH ON YOUR MIND. ALSO MAKE SURE YOU GIVE THE CENTER A SCHEDULE OF YOUR SON AND EVERYTHING SHOULD WORK OUT. GOOD LUCK DONT WORK TO HARD. CONGRATS ON YOUR NEW BABY:)

Leah - posted on 07/16/2009

I had to go back to work when my son was 6 weeks old and it was really hard. My husband works nights though so he stayed home with him while I went to work during the day. That helped, but I was still so sad that I'd have to miss all his firsts and be away from him for 9-1/2 hours 5 days a week. (Plus school 2 nights a week!) I was afraid he'd forget about me or not love me. But I didn't miss all his firsts, and those that I did, I heard about in extensive detail. He's 4 now and he adores me! The look on his face when I get home is really priceless. We gave him a late bedtime, which really helps me get to see him more and allows my husband to sleep in a little in the morning. I make sure to squeeze as much time in with him as I can (all day Saturday and most weeknights it's just me and him time). So it is hard at first but it does get a lot better. It's our routine now and I don't think any of us would have it any other way now.

Richelle - posted on 07/15/2009

Not so easy, my baby gurl is 5 months, I work two jobs.. and sometimes im gone for nearly 10 hours at a time.. alli think about is her at work and get a lil sad, but when u come home and see how happy they are too see u is the best!

Bridgiette - posted on 07/15/2009

You will survive - although you think you won't. I cried all day and hated life for about a week - everyone goes through it. Don't spend these last days at home dreading Monday. That is the worst. Just enjoy. And it's okay to cry as much as you want.

Kris - posted on 07/14/2009

yeh it wasnt to bad, if i had the chance id give up work in a heart beat to stay home, but i dont see the happening. :(

Kris - posted on 07/14/2009

hey thanks everyone everything u said helped, i got through it okay was only half a day so when i do a full day i hope ill be able to handle it better.

Cesilia - posted on 07/13/2009

I am in the same boat... My baby boy is 7 months old and I just went back to work last week. I never would have thought it would be so hard to be away from him that long.



Everyone tells me, too, it will get easier, so just hang in there and trust that it will! Also, the time you do have with him once you get home... cherish it!

Jessica - posted on 07/13/2009

It is really hard. This is my second time going through it and the only thing that keeps me going is knowing that my son (3 yrs) turned out fabulous being away from me starting at 8 weeks. Now, my daughter is doing the same thing and in the end, they really are fine. The hardest part is thinking "will they know me, will they love me, will they hate me, but they love me just the same and actually my patience with them is probably better because I do get that break. Don't get me wrong, the days do drag and I hate being away from them. Hang in there - it is what it is (unfortunately).

Esther - posted on 07/13/2009

It was hard, especially the first day, but you are doing what is right for your family. Also, it is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much harder on mom than it is on the baby. They really don't care, as long as they are held, fed & can sleep when they want. Especially when they are still that young. My son has been going to daycare full time (about 10 hours a day) since he was 12 weeks old. And I have to tell you, even if I won the lottery today and was able to stay home, I'm not sure I would take him out of daycare completely. For my own selfish wants, I would, but for him, I don't think I would. He loves being at his daycare and he is really getting so much out of it. He's an only child and just having the other kids around alone is worth it to me. Also, my daycare has been a huge support to me during my first year as a mom. It was invaluable to have help in getting him on a schedule, transitioning him from 2 naps to one, getting him on a sippy instead of a bottle etc. Not to mention the many questions they answered for me like what to do about those runny noses, rashes, temper tantrums etc. It's hard at first, but it won't be forever. Good luck!

Joy - posted on 07/13/2009

hi, I started back at work today and left my son who is 10 months old at daycare. I work 4 hrs a day and he is at daycare for 4 and a half hrs. It is really really tough but at the same time I know it is really good for the both of us. I get to use my brain at work and get some adult time and he gets to play with other kids and spend time with other adults. I think about him every minute and wonder what he is doing and i know that no one could ever do a better job than me BUT we will both get used to it and so will you. Good luck and look at this as the next phase of being a parent. I wish i had done it earlier to make it a bit easier on him......

Kelly - posted on 07/12/2009

It is really hard, but just keep thinking that you are working to provide for your baby.......