how can i keep my son from being so hyper active
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Cut down on his sugar in take especially refine sugar. Give natural fruits instead and play / work with them with educational games. Let them help you to cook, clean up, gardening, arts and crafts, etc. You will find that they enjoy it, is learning, and cuts the hyperactivity down because they are busy doing something constructive while learning and bonding with you at the same time.
Melinda - posted on 06/01/2010
Ok..I disagree with Susan. Teachers do not dislike these kids. I am a teacher and it can be challenging just as it is for parents. I know I live with a child who is severly ADHD. You did not share many details about your child. I will share my experience as a mother of a super, funny, intelligent hyper child. My daughter could not sit long to read a small board book until she was about 5. She could not sit to watch a 20 minute cartoon until she was in 2nd grade! She was constantly moving. Her K and 1st grade teacher was wonderful. My child (and the others) were allowed to jump, run in place, stand, etc. while doing their work. She was interested if they knew the information not could they sit.
I would watch your child and make notes of how long he can sit till. Is there anything that he can sit still for? What kind of behaviors does he exhibit when he is active? Is it moving the leg constantly? tapping his fingers, jumping, etc? Is he just active or does he lose focus that causes him to jump from activity to activity? When you know these answers, it will help you to know where you are. You can go visit your pediatrician to see what is the typical attention span/hyperactivity rate for a child his age. Your pediatrician can help with this. One thing I would do was when I pulled out a board book, I knew that we only read one page before she was running down the hall the previous time. So , I would tell her to sit so that we could read two pages. That is all she could handle. The timer works wonderfully for getting tasks accomplished. However, a certain amount of time is not what every child needs. Start at where your child is. If he cannot complete a task in 5 minutes, then start there before you go to 30. Set you and your child up for success and less stress.
I really wish you had shared more details about the situation. It all makes a difference. Some children become more active when parents split or there is a major life change in their lives.
BTW, the food thing is an issue with some children. My child with ADHD can drink a soda with caffeine and it will calm her down. My other child will drink the same drink and it will hype her up! So, I say all of this to tell you to watch your child and write down things you notice. Chart foods, daily events, etc. Notice how his days are with less routine verses days with more regimentented routine. Notice what happens when there is extra stimulation such as a child's birthday party. How does he react compared to the other kids his age there?
I hope this gives you a start. Unfortunately, not all children are the same. You will need to see what works for you and your child. I wish you luck. I knwo the stress and it can get better!
Florencetine - posted on 06/16/2010
Sometimes all a child wants is your attention. I dealt with an autistic child who could not stay still. She was always on the go. flinging her hands and made these weird noises.
When she noticed that I was in the same place every day at the same time, she started calming down enough to come over to see what you were doing. This place was in the play room where we all would gather as a family but I chose to sit in the same seat in a area that had all of her things, While others chose to do something different each day. I would be looking through her books, games or blocks
We feel that she sensed that we were there for her and she wanted in her way to communicate with us, so she started sitting down near me to see what I was doing.The first time, I started reading to her, which lasted for about 5-10 minutes. The next time we would have a puzzle or leggo blocks which she loved. Each time the time increased. Eventually, we were able to sit with her and hug her off and on. She was much quieter and loveable, which was a miracle in itself. Austitic Individuals does not like to be touched.
Keeping a child busy, regardless of age, makes them feel a part of what is going on.You can get a 2 yr old to put away his toys, go get the next book for you to read to him. Let him choose a tv program or decide what he want for a meal a day of the week (let it be his night to chose).Be prepared for a couple of off the wall menus. When a child in involved and he is so excited to help, you can let him knows that he must calm down ie, stop running, stand still first in order to help you. You may be surprised and it is a good starting point. To start measuring what he likes to do most and how long he remained calm will let you will be able to see the progress more clearly.
I have worked with special needs for many years and we have found out that most kids activeness is an attention getter.
When we started letting them know that we could not help unless they calm down and tell or show me what it is that they wanted. You will be surprised how quickly they will respond because really they want to please you even sometimes when they donot know how or what to do except to be active.
Each child is different and special in their own way. They have their own personality, likes and dislikes. We just have to be in tune with their attitudes to anticipate their next move.
By recording what goes on each day, will give you a guide as to what to look out for. Knowing what will calm then and what will set them aflight will be a good measure for you.
I hope you find encouragement in my words and not feel like I am preaching to you which I am not. I know how difficult this situation is and I will pray that as time goes on things will get better for you.
I do have one advice that I feel that must be followed. That is for you to take care of yourself. Get plenty of rest, even if it means that you do not wash the dishes tonight and if you possible, take a mini vacation now and then, even if it means having someone watch him overnight so you can recharge, relax, go to a movie or out to dinner. THIS WILL DO YOU A WORLD OF GOOD .
Leigh - posted on 06/08/2010
Okay my son was diagnosed with ADHD a couple of months ago. I purchased the book 'Fed Up' it is about changing diet to change behaviours in children. It turns out my son has an intolerance to salicylates (which are in pretty well every fruit and a lot of vegies) he is also intolerant of dairy. Many people are skeptical of withdrawing fruit from their childs diet as was I, but someone gave him one slice of apple about a week ago and he went crazy and has only just started to calm down again. Dont listen to people who say cut back sugar, give him more fruit. Find out what it is that your son is intolerant of cause I can guarantee it is something and your life will be sooo much easier.
The book outlines an elimination diet where different varities of foods are eliminated salicylates, amines, preservatives the works. Their is also a companion cook book that makes like a lot easier. Give it a go. I saw massive improvements in my son after about 4 days. Would never go back to giving him fruit (well most fruit, he still eats a select few) like I used to, he is so much better behaved, happier, achieving so much more at school and is making more friends.
Dont just assume it is preservatives, yes preservatives can set some children off, but some children like my son are set off by other chemicals, these same chemicals that never existed 40years ago because fruit is grown to be picked earlier and have a longer shelf life thus changing the whole chemical makeup of the fruit.
It does not matter if you are a stay at home mum or work, or whether you provide activities for children non stop as a teacher no child wants their whole school day and then home day regemented into activity after activity. And wearing him out is not solving the problem all it is doing is making him sleep! I think you are probably doing a wonderful job and only recommend giving the diet a try, dont let anyones comments let you think otherwise. but I am sure you will see massive improvements if you try the elimination diet. I am about to try a gluten free diet too to see if that has any effects. Even if he is diagnosed ADHD you dont have to medicate and there are simple ways to help. Have faith and believe in yourself and how great a mom you are.
The book is 'Fed Up' by Sue Dengate, it is now my bible! Dont go anywhere without it!
Susan - posted on 06/01/2010
I fear we are drugging every gifted child in this country...they are more active than the average child, more curous, more apt to question things they hear...even from adults. Most teachers do not really like these kids, as they are "too much trouble.". How do I know? I was one. All three of my children were as well, as was their father. We just never really "fit in"....but we didn't have ADD...we were "too smart for our own good"....Keep your child engaged. If they are kept intrigued, they go in a positive direction. Don't drug them.
This conversation has been closed to further comments
Natasha - posted on 06/12/2010
Find things to do to tire him out, I used to take my kids to the mall and let them walk or to the park and let them play till the get tired when you get home grab a mean and a warm bath and they were ready for theb bed. Oh also I kept them with a lot of interesting toys to keep their attention so that they could stop bouncing all over the place
Lorraine Alicia - posted on 06/12/2010
I had the same problem with my son and the problem was even worse when he had to start school, because the teachers were complaining thay could not keep up with him. I started trying to find activities that he liked that did not involve him running all over. I also would spend some quite time with him, i would sit with him, somtimes even hold him in my arms an talk. I had to put aside this time everyday which was about 7pm because i work. After a while i noticed a different he was still very active but was able to settle down when required.
I only got this to work when he started preschool, before that i was clueless. I will just allow him to go until he tired and then he will settle down.
The teachers said they noticed a different he was still active but was also able to settle down and do his school work when required. He is 6yrs now and it still works. He knows he is allowed to play untill 6.45pm and after that is settle time i do not have to sit with him now he would watch a movie and before you know it he fells asleep. Somtimes even before 7.30pm.
Somtimes children just needs simple routine.
Cassandra - posted on 06/11/2010
My son was hyperactive so I took him to his pediatrician and we changed his diet to one low of sugar and added more activities into his daily routine. I am also a working mom so I know how challenging this can be but just work something out with your babysitter as far as activities for them throughout the day. I even took some stuff to my sitters house to help keep him busy and so far its working. If u try these things and it doesn't work, talk to your pediatrician asking questions never hurts.
Angela - posted on 06/11/2010
-How old is he? Please keep his age into consideration. If he is 4 or younger, his hyperactiveness is most likely normal. Finding more activities for him would be a good solution. (Quiet Toys, Books, Take him walking with you, Jump Rope, Sidewalk Chalk, & Visits at local park or outdoor play.)
My daughter is five and she has ADHD. I started to notice that she was more active than other children around the age of four. If you suspect your son has ADHD wait till he is in Kindergarten or consult with his current (last year's teacher) and you can have him evaluated by a doctor for ADHD.
ADHD Treatments would include:
-Behavioral Therapy: (actual therapy visits, We have not done this.)
-Behavioral Therapy Approach/Solutions: This would be the same as examples I listed above that you would do with a non-ADHD child. (We do this.) Any of the Positive Discipline books by Jane Nelson are wonderful. I usually don't like parenting books because they are written by people who have never had children, but this lady has raised seven children. Also, ask older (great-grandmother age) women for advice.
-Medication (several types, including non-stimulant)-My daughter is currently on a non-stimulant ADHD med. and it helps her a lot!
-Search some blogs that mom's have written on their struggl with ADHD. Even if your child does not have ADHD, the same tactics will work for the average child.
Good Luck! Children grow up fast and this phase will not last forever. There have and will bee trials and blessings in every stage and age of child rearing.
Selina - posted on 06/09/2010
All children need STRUCTURE, without it they are hyper, uncooperative, and seek attention. This means having a "regular schedule" of daily events so that your child knows what to expect everyday. Keeping him busy with activities will lesson anxiety.
Rachel - posted on 06/05/2010
I agree with the diet recommendations. My son was very active, even in the womb! He is now almost three and we feed him a lot of fresh foods, including mostly fruits and veggies. Processed foods often have unnecessary additives and sugars, so can contribute to hyperactivity.
Even without much sugar or processed foods, our son still has a LOT of energy, so we encourage a lot of free play where he can be active and wear himself out. As a result, he is a very happy, healthy and well-behaved active child.
Remember, boys are often more active than girls anyway. :) Give him lots of play time and let him be rambunctious with dad. Our son loves the inexpensive toys the most - balls he can throw/chase, sticks that are pretend swords, and playing with the dog. We let him play "monster" and run around the house pretending to be the "good monster" and hunt down the bad ones (ah, active imagination to go with that active body of his! It keeps us on our toes! :). We still do quieter games, like lego building and such. But, usually when he has already spent some of his energy and is ready to focus on quieter things.
Just pay attention to and encourage his interests and he will find ways of entertaining and wearing himself out. :)
Serena - posted on 06/02/2010
Taking him to a park where u can let him run as he plaeses, i do that with my daughter some times and when we get home, i set a nice bubbled bath and give her some food if she hasn't eating and before u no it she is fast asleep until morning!
Maggie - posted on 06/02/2010
Is he really hyper or is he just being a kid? I have to remind myself sometimes that kids have a lot of energy - that doesn't make them "hyper". Try getting him some activities that will make him think more (but not too hard for his age). I've found that my kids are more calm if they have to use brain power. It also helps them learn to sit still for a little while. My boys are 2 and 4 so we have shape sorters, books, toy tools, and LOTS of blocks/legos. I've also found that outside time is WONDERFUL for kids. Take him to a park or let him play in the yard for about an hour a day and he'll burn off some of that energy!
How old is your son? What is he doing that makes you think he's "hyper active" and not just the regular amount of active for his age?
Boys are active, especially when they are younger and haven't learned to focus on one task. I agree with Susan to a point. Some (not ALL by any means) teachers (or even parents/day care workers/administrators) will use the ADD/ADHD label to drug the kids into being calm. I think those diagnoses are overused and normal healthy kids are being labeled because they want to do what kids were made to do (explore, learn, discover) but it doesn't fit with the current school system.
Anyway, more information would be helpful in answering this question but hopefully this gave you something to think about.
Catherine - posted on 06/01/2010
Yes, I have an 8 year old girl, very hyper active, I go to park to burn it off at play ground, or nature walk to burn off, read a book for about 20-30 min, let her read to me for 15, give her coloring book to use while sitting, give a small sweet snack, make her change garbage cans, clean her room, but time her to do it, sweep the floor and then give hot bath. I wear her butt out, until she asks to sit down. It works, she has ADD in a mild form, but changing activites every 30 min helps a whole lot.
Susan - posted on 05/31/2010
Don't "keep" him from being active...wear him out. I got my son a pile of old appliances from a thrift store, told him they were his to fix. He was fascinated. Smart, active kids need to be challenged, not changed. Be glad your boy is able.
Cathrine - posted on 05/31/2010
Its also worth having a look at his diet, my girls go mental if they have squash even the sugar free stuff.
Other thing may be to cultivate quiet time you didnt say how old he is but for me sitting down and reading a book to my girls really calms them down.
Jessi - posted on 05/31/2010
unfortunately little ones have lots of energy. are you a working mom or a stay at home mom? you can always try to add some stuff to his routine that will make him burn off his energy. another issue if that doesn't work would be to get him checked for adhd. a friend of mine has adhd...she was ALWAYS hyper it didn't matter what she did but she wasn't one for burning it off with exercise so she was a little hard to control.
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