how do i get my children to get along?

Katie - posted on 11/20/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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i have 3 kids an 8yr old boy a 5 yr old boy and a 2yr old girl....none of them get along my oldest is understandable but he doesnt know how to get along with his brother he fights with him over everything....the same with my 5yr old he fights constantly with his sister (2yrs) weather its over toys or sitting next to me on the couch..... I cant take the arguing and fighting and yelling anymore....Is there any thing i can do?

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Comfort - posted on 11/22/2009

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I have 13yr old, 12yr old and 7 yr old, since the second, I always involved the 13yrs old, and 12yrs old, 7yrs old and let them realized they have to watch our for each other, protect each other. Each one of them have their toys. They don't share toys, the toys that the older outgrown goes to the youger ones. Until the younger one can decide which toys actually is his favorite. You have to be firm as a mother and let them realize the importance of them watching out for each other, and not fighting.

Norma - posted on 11/22/2009

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My boys are the same they have 18 months between them and i though being close in age would help but it has made no differance. And it drives me round the bend. But as much as they fight with each other over anything and everything they dont allow other people to do it. If they are playing with other kids and one of the kids starts with one of them the other one is right there defending his brother. So i try not to stress to much about fighting with each other because they show they will look after each other with outsiders. And the other strange thing is if one of them sees the other one start a fight with another kid they will step in and tell there brother there wrong and not to do it. So it appears to them it is ok to fight with each other but other people arrent allowed to do it to them and there not allowed to do it to other people. And like Angela says if they cant play with a toy together then they wont have it to play with atall. As for sitting with me i make them take turns other wise i end up being used as a climbing fram as they wresle over me. Good luck.

Rae - posted on 11/21/2009

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If you figure it out please let me know. My kids got into a fight yesterday over who's blood tastes better.

Angela - posted on 11/20/2009

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Good Luck. sibling rivary is hard! My sister and I fought because we were as different as night and day, it wasn't until we got older that we started having more things in common. Besides the age difference didn't help either. (we're 6 yrs apart). I was determine to have my kids closer in age hoping that they would have a close relationship. Now all they do is fight. the bog picks on the little one, the little one is always taking whatever the big one have. One thing I noticed is that my girls mainly fight over me. toys yes, but lately i hear fights about whose mama am I? so i just tell them that i'm both of their moms and that they only have each other, and that they need to be nice to each other because they only have each other. If you explain how important each one of them is to you and your family individually and how they need to band together as a unit. hopefully that can stop some of the fights. as for fights with toys, if you can play with it together, you don't get to play with it at all. And i take it from them, if its something they really want to play with, they'll make it work. for the couch thing, sit in the middle and have either one sit on each side, that way they both get a piece of mommy. just be creative, as for the yelling, that never ceases. just got to get used to it.

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