how do u cope as a working class mum without a babysitter or maid?

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Holly - posted on 04/29/2009

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it's not easy. and you try to manage it all but i managed to keep up on the basic stuff that needed to get done first and the other stuff on my days off by the time my daughter got to grade three i was working a full time job that required me to at work untill after 4 pm. then i heard about an after school program. it did me wonders

Megan - posted on 05/04/2009

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I am a working mum with no maid and it is about what is important to you! Me for example; when my child is up that is important and when asleep I am important! what makes me happy is a tidy house (not always clean but tidy!) So I have a routine; when my girl goes to bed I put washing onto timer to start in the middle of the night, wash dishes put away yesterdays washing and swep the floor then I watch tv and relax. In the morning I get up 3/4 hour early and hang washing out and arrange tea for the night and pack her clothes for day care. Everyone has something that will make them feel better tidy, clean, tv, sleep! do what works for you. I seriously only clean on the weekends (vac and mop, dust etc) and not even every weekend they are precious moments!

Candice - posted on 04/29/2009

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I SAY LET THE LAUNDRY GET BEHIND, ITS SO NOT WORTH GETTING UPSET ABOUT. PLAYING A GAME OR LAYING BY THE POOL AND HAVING FUN WITH THE KIDS IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN UNLOADING THE DISHWASHER.

I PERSONALY GET UP EARLY SO I PICK UP HERE AND THERE THEN A LITTLE AFTER WORK, SATURDAY MORNING WE ALL HAVE OUR JOBS AND WE FINISH IN AN 1HR, FUN FOR THE REST OF THE WEEKEND,

Emily - posted on 04/29/2009

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I'm not rich by any means but I hire someone to clean my house. It has helped my marriage, psyche, and relationship with my kids because I am not constantly stressed about the mess. Some people ask how can I afford it- my response "How could I not?"

Jenifer - posted on 04/28/2009

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There are several options, the round robin babysitting factor is a good one, get a group of friends together from church, work, or wherever, and take turns babysitting. Cause sweety you need time too. Then as the others have mentioned don't sweat the small stuff, if the house isn't perfect you will all survive trust me. I pick a room a day and I don't have that many to worry about and I try to make that one room as clean as I can in an allotted amount of time based on how much time I have. Rmember to make time to relax and spend with the children as well. There are clubs if they are old enough one of my sons goes to drama after school until 5. One plays soccer until 4:30. Different days, church Youth groups are good if their old enough. Basically anything that gets you a bit of time for yourself, and that is free. Then there's the ever popular play dates, but be prepared to take your turn on that one. So as a single working mom I know you know how to use your imagination, what ever works for you works : )

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Amy - posted on 05/02/2009

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THANK YOU!!! I have a messy house, too. We have never been clean freaks (books around, etc) but now there are baby toys, baby books, etc, everywhere. I have started tossing his toys into his play yard and calling it good.

Jill - posted on 04/30/2009

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You guys have reallly made me feel good. I'm currently pregnant with my second (due July 30th), have a 3 yr old dtr, and work 40 yrs wk. I used to clean every day and make sure my house looked great if someone's coming over. Now I'm happy if everyone has a clean outfit to wear tomorrow. Priorities definatley change!!

Kristy - posted on 04/30/2009

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I like to look at me working and a house work and children in one way. Your child will only be a child for a short period of time and the house work will always be there tomorrow or when they are moved out and you have time to do it. Dont fret over a messy house your children wont care or remember they will remember that mom was there for them and did things with them and worried about a clean house last. clean when your expecting company play with your kids when your not. Good luck Kristy

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I'm with Emily C. I can't afford to NOT have someone clean my house! There is no way I can do it all. Kudos to the moms that make it work otherwise!

Andie - posted on 04/28/2009

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I'm a single mom with an 8 yo. I've started (although I'm still not consistent) setting a timer for 15 minutes and picking one area to clean. It always surprises me with home much I can do in 15 minutes. This can't include laundry though - or we'd never have clean clothes. :) My 8yo has recently started working with me. She'll spend 15 minutes on her bathroom, bedroom or play area. I give her lots of praise and sometimes a little money. Both of us get a great sense of accomplishment.

Another thing I do to be able to get out of the house, is trading baby-sitting. There is a family in the neighborhood that I trade with occasionally and I've done it with a friend at work as well. If you don't have the money for a babysitter, this is a great option to get an afternoon off.

Siobhan - posted on 04/28/2009

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Mostly I try to accept the fact that some stuff won't get done. Do I need to do laundry every day? Nope. Do all the toys have to get put away? Not really. And I get home and make a point of enjoying time with my girls before I do anything else. We pushed dinner back in an hour so I had time with them and that helps. And simply remember, filth and mess are different things. Mess can be ignored, filth should never be. :)

Khadija - posted on 04/28/2009

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its not easy dear. am grateful to my mum who lives around me and my mum in law who also leaves just around me. recently my maid had to go home for medical treatment. and i have to go to work. i was in a dilemma for sometime but thank God my mum took care of one of my daughter and my mother in law took one. that was abit easy for me. am just imagining what i would have done if it were not for them. i was avoiding calling in sick to work since i have just started working. how old is your child/children

Trish - posted on 04/26/2009

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I try and do something small every day to keep on top of things. It's not easy and I often fail at it but at least the intention is there. Laundry I try and do one or two loads a day. I'm lucky that I work from home while my girls are in creche in the morning. I've learnt to not stress the small stuff but there are somethings, like teh dishes, that I insist get done on a daily basis.

Janine - posted on 04/26/2009

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my son is 3 just turned and i have worked since he was 18mth i am also a single parent and i will tell anyone who asks being a mum is the hardest job have vever done and i havehad some rough ones. I am lucky because levi settled into nursery/child minder very well, i do what most mums have said dont stress if i dont do it i dont stress it not going any where unless cleaning faries come (i live in hope) most precious time is spent with my son my home may not be sparking but it not dirty and my son is happy and heakthy kife is to short to worry about if the dusting gets done. good luck working your way around it im sure you will

Vicki - posted on 04/26/2009

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Working with a kids/baby is tough! But kudos t you for doing it. :) The mos timportant thign is to not stress if things don't get done (laundry, housecleaning, etc.). Maximize the time you do get to spend with the kids and take as many shortcuts as you can to get to that goal. Cook twice as much for dinner and freeze half so you can use the same dish the following week. Make grocery lists and meal plans to you dont' waste your time trying to decide what to cook. Pick one day in the week to do laundry. That way you are running multiple loads every day.Open communication with your husband/partner and the rest of the family also makes a huge difference.

Melissa - posted on 04/25/2009

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I too struggle with the less then perfect clean home. I find that during the week if I have to take time off because the boys are sick or day care is closed that I scrub and clean all day to try and make up for the weeks and months I don't get to do it.

User - posted on 04/25/2009

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You learn to live with slightly less perfection then you did before kids. Maybe the mail piles up or the dishes didn't get washed one night, but those things become inconsequential. Spending quality time with your kids becomes job #1. Once you learn to love and accept that the rest falls into place.

Gabrielle - posted on 04/25/2009

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NOt too well:) My mother lives 4 hours away and my in-laws live on the other side of the world so things tend to pile up a bit here. I am lucky in that my husband tries to help as much as possible but the ironing just seems to be never ending. When my mother in law does come to visit I let her help out by doing the ironing.
Cooking extra each night and freezing left overs helps by not having to cook a couple of nights a week.

Brydget - posted on 04/24/2009

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I prioritise, laundry gets done when it needs to get done or it waits till the weekend! The hardest thing is coming home from work, having to give bubs a bath, feed her, make dinner, wash her bottles, fit in another express session and then get organised for the next morning and try and spend some time with my husband! Throw in a few days where I have to bring home work and its all a wash.

Rebecca - posted on 04/24/2009

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You have to look at the bigger picture - work out what HAS to be done on a daily/ weekly/ monthy basis, remember there is a difference between home with children and a home without. Depending on how old your children are get them involved on a cleaning roster for pocket money - they could dust, wash dishes, clean the bathroom, etc!! Don't stress over the little things, it will still be their tommorrow!! Remember to enjoy your children first and foremost and be house proud second!!

Tamra - posted on 04/24/2009

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It has not been easy...let me tell ya. I am constantly behind in housework, there is always something I should be doing, and there are days that I don't feel like do anything because there is so much to do, but very little time. How do I cope,? I try to get my husband to help out as much as possible and I take some time for ME!!! Even if just a movie, a good book, getting my hair done or getting my feet done. You have to spend some ME time or you will go nuts!!!

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