How do you handle a partner who does not tolerate you taking care of your child well??.

Janeen - posted on 07/16/2011 ( 1 mom has responded )

3

10

so my partner constantly is upset with me for taking care of our son; when i say that i mean, I am a full time working mom and i am the only one making any income, my hours for work suck. I work from 10am to 6:30 pm. my sons father stays at home, currently out of work. so when i come home, my son who is 2, comes running to me giving me big hugs and kisses, the best thing a mom can come home to after a long day at work. I play with him for an hour or two as dinner is being made and bath time, then bed...all this within just about 3 hours. so i don't get too much time to enjoy with my son. My partner though seem to think i am babying my son because when i am gone from him for a long time i hold him and just enjoy him when i do see him. a better example would be recently i work my normal hours and my son and his father went to help his sister move. they were gone for most of the day, and i went after work to a small bday party for a friend. we both were gone for most of the day, and everything was fine. we both get home around 12:30 midnight...as my sons father gets him out of the car and into the house and gets him ready for bed, his father takes him to the potty because we are potty training, and after my son was done, he nicely walks up to me for me to hold him. and of coarse i did. i stand to just enjoy my son for a few moments and my partner decided to tell me that i have to put him down into his bed. OK, i can understand that my son needs to go to bed because it is almost 1 am in the morning, but he also needed his mom...so i stand my ground and tell my partner i will put him to bed in just a few, he decides to get very upset at me for enjoying my time telling me i need to separate myself from my son and stop being so needy. my partner then decided to pretty much start speaking loudly toward me telling me i am a horrible person for pretty much holding my son for a few extra moments. personnelly i don't think me spending a few min with my son before he goes to bed since he was half awake is a bad thing. or me spending time with my son when he needs me to or when he wants me...am i totally wrong in what i am doing, i mean i don't want my son to very dependent on me when he gets older but, with the age that he is at, i don't see it as being bad for him currently. as much as i have looked into developmentally needs for him. its a good thing for me to do what i do since i am gone for most of the day, and i dont get much interaction with him. i see it as a both of us needing each other. but i don't feel i am being too overbearing or needy as my partner would say. Moms i need your advise, how would you handle this type of situation.

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1 Comment

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Rachel - posted on 07/16/2011

444

43

I Honestly Dont see a problem with what you are doing I do the same thing with my 17month old little girl. I am the only one that works in my house and my boyfriend is home with my kids 4 and 17 months all day. I come home and spend time with my daughter. My son is kinda a loner and likes to be more independant. So I will Hold her and take her out to the store with my if i have to go and my boyfriend doesnt have a problem with it. I think you need to tell your other half that he needs to back off and let you be a mom. You support him and he just needs to let you have your time with your son since you are already missing alot while you are at work. Good luck and dont let him bully you into not spending time with your son. He needs you he is still just little and needs mommy.