How do you handle it when your child lies to you?

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User - posted on 05/31/2009

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Ask him why he lied. When my son lies that is the first thing I ask him. Normally his response is that he was afraid of my reaction to the truth. That's when I explain to him that if he had told me the truth to begin with then I would have xyz (normally something along the lines of we would have talked through the issue, but this will all depend on what the lie was about), but since he lied the consequences are now abc and wouldn't it have just been much better to tell me the truth.
Bottom line is I try to get across to him that lying isn't ok and that it is much easier to just tell the truth to begin with. I do this by making sure he knows what the outcome would have been if he told the truth from the start and comparing it to what the outcome was with the lie. I make sure he understands the difference.
We went through a spell for quite a while where everything was a lie and finally it seemed to click and now he is doing very well.

Janice - posted on 05/28/2009

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just try to explain that lieing really hurts mummy and makes you sad and it has consequences like confiscating a toy that he likes for a period of time, if all else fails tell him his nose will grow

Cece - posted on 05/28/2009

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Hi, thats tough.my daughter at times lies and I know shes lying so I just talk to her and explain that lying is a bad thing. If your religious you could explain that God doesnt like liers and He punishes them. My daughter understood that and the situation has improved.I hope that will help you.

Carla - posted on 05/27/2009

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That would really depend on your child's age. I am teaching my 4 year old the difference between the truth and a lie. He now likes to claim his 18 mo old sister is doing things. If I catch him in a lie, depending on the lie, I give him a time out. I don't know how I would handle it if the child is older. Guess it would depend on what the lie was about.

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