I found a better babysitter, how do I fire my old one politely?

Julie - posted on 09/26/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )

10

52

0

My 16 yr old neighbor has been watching my kids for me on the weekends and on special occasions for a year now. She is a sweet girl and I’ve never had problems with her. For the last month I have been using her as my after school care sitter. It’s about 15 hours a week M-TH. I have slowly been noticing things that I am unhappy with.

For example: I asked her to have my little ones in daycare picked up by 4pm, I found out she’s not getting there until after 5pm and sometimes it’s almost 6pm. My school aged child gets home on the school bus and is left home alone until she gets there. Also my daughter tells me things she says that I am unhappy with- like “I’m not your mom”. She doesn’t let them do things that I have said they can do. I feel like she just sits on my couch and watches my TV. She doesn’t play and interact with them, take them outside or on walks. She has lied to me and said she took my girls to the library, when my daughter said they have not been to the library.

I have found another girl who wants to babysit for me. She is almost 18 and planning on studying early childhood development when she goes to college next year. She is a little more expensive but I feel like she will be worth it. She has fun ideas and I have already set the standard that I expect full interaction with my kids. She also has no problem being there on time. She has very reliable references as well.

So my question is how do I let the old sitter go politely? She is my neighbor and I would still like to use her on the weekends occasionally. I don’t want her to be mad with me or treat the kids badly in the future. Do I offer her severance pay? She has only been doing this for a month so I feel like she was still in a probationary period. Do I need to give a notice even- and how long of a notice?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Julie - posted on 09/28/2011

10

52

0

Thank you so much for all your input. I actually spoke with my sitter 2 days ago. She and her mother came to me because one of my children had let it slip that I was looking for a new sitter. That was my fault for letting the kids know. I told them both about the new girl. I told them about her background with her education and her connection with my church. I told them that I would like to give her an opportunity to gain experience with children. The mom agreed that this would be a good opportunity for the new girl. I invited the new sitter over last night to have dinner with myself and the kids just to be sure that we were all in agreement. I plan on talking to the old sitter tonight and letting her know that my decision is final and I will be letting her go. I am going to let her finish out this week and pay her on Friday- but the new sitter is to start on Monday. I will talk about the timing in picking up the children, and let her know that was a huge factor in my decision.
I do want to use her on the weekends, and this is why: On the weekends as a single mom I like to spend time out with my friends, or date or attend various activities and functions in town. I try to plan things every other weekend (that’s when the kids go to dads). But occasionally I have things that come up on my weekends. That is when I would use my neighbors. She does not have to pick them up at these times and its usually in the evenings when all she has to do is put them to bed and wait till I get home. Like I said she has been doing occasional weekend work for me for a year now and I have no problem continuing that with her. I pray that there will be no hard feelings and she will understand where I am coming from.

This conversation has been closed to further comments

2 Comments

View replies by

Amy - posted on 09/27/2011

6,467

33

2386

I think being honest with her is going to be in her best interest. In the real world no employer is going to tolerate her being 2 hours late, and ignoring her job duties. If you don't feel comfortable having a conversation about responsibility then speak to her parents because the are probably under the impression that she's taking care of your kids when she's really off doing something else.
I don't really understand why you would still want her for the occasional weekend, but since you do you can phrase it like this "you're probably really busy with school which is why you aren't picking up the kids from daycare on time, since I'm being charged extra for that hour or two they're are being left there and I'm paying you too I've decided that during the week I need someone who is going to be a little more responsible. I would still like to use you occasionally on the weekends but it seems like it's just a bit too much for you to handle during the week"
As far as severance pay goes most full time employees dont even get severance pay, you don't have to give notice unless you have a contract with her and even if she did her primary job us to care for the kids not leave them unattended or to watch tv, thats grounds for termination.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms