Its time to go back to work...Need ADVICE!!!

[deleted account] ( 15 moms have responded )

Its almost been eight weeks and time for me to go back to work,but I know it is going to be really hard and I can promise that I will probably cry...I just need advice that will help me get through the day...I am dreading going back, even thinking about it makes sad...

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Desiree - posted on 11/08/2009

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Tomorrow is my first day back at work and JB's first day at daycare. I cried myself to sleep last night, and periodically today. Tomorrow is going to be miserable...but I know it's good for both of us.

Natalia - posted on 11/08/2009

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eight weeks goes by so fast that will be hard for you. If you are using care go and check out the center and get to know who will be working in the baby room and you will feel more confident. They are great they are there just to look after your child and are very professional. If you have family or friends then that will be nice for you.

It is hard to stay positive but try and keep busy during the day and think of all the great things about them. Try not to feel to sad at the end of the day when they are tired and go to sleep when you havent seen them all day. Lots of parents feel guilty because they have to go back to work but they will always love you and be yours and you will have many happy memories together :) and it is always mummy that children ask for I know I have two teenage boys

JULIE - posted on 11/08/2009

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Hi Yvonne, I agree with everything everyone else has said. I returned to work 3 days a week when my daughter (first child) was 10 months old in July 09 just gone. She spends one day at day care centre and two days with my mum. A month or so prior to going back i started sending her to stay with my mum one day and one night a week and she started going to day care for 2-3 hours once a week and I built up the time at day care each week till it was an 8 hour day. I have always had no problem sending her to stay with my mum as I know she encourages learning and celebrates her milestones with such enthusiasm and love like my husband and I. Day care in the beginning was hard as she cried every time i dropped her off when attending for a full day for the first 6-7 weeks. It was awful but I just reminded myself that the the longer I lingered the worse it got. I drop her off and stay for 10 mins or so, get her started with a little friend playing a game or something then say "mummy is going to work now, have a great day, love you and kiss her goodbye" She doesnt cry now which is great. As far as when you are at work I cannot emphasize this enough.... if you want to call and check on her call.... I used to call once a day in my lunch break to mum or day care and hear how she is going puts my mind at rest.

I've been back at work 3 months now and I dont feel the need to call anymore has I feel reassured she is in good hands. You havent said if your bub is going to day care or to a family member - either way, tell your carer what your bub likes/dislikes and routine.. the more info the better and remember I wouldnt believe it at the time but it truly, truly, truly does get easier... and like other mums have said, I have more patience and more to give in general to my daughter when we are together and our time is higher in quality as a result.

Also, i know i am rambling, if it is any comfort... those kids who are in hysterics and dreadfully upset on the first day of school or kindergarten are generally the ones who havent been cared for by anyone else but mum since day of birth. I am sure yours and mine will hopefully be confidently running through the gate leaving us behind in tears! Good luck with it all! We all understand how you feel :)

Jerilyn - posted on 11/07/2009

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I went through it twice. With my son, it wasn't too bad since my mom was caring for him in my home. But when it came time for my daughter, I had to find a sitter. Luckily, she lives up the street from me. It was hard for me, but I had an understanding sitter who didn't mind me calling a couple of times during the day to ask how she was doing. I know that part of the separation anxiety was due to my worries about how she would do without me. But as the days went by, I felt more comfortable. Just by looking foward to seeing how happy she was when I picked her up makes the separation easier. You'll be fine! Hang in there!

Andrea - posted on 11/07/2009

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The first day is the worst, but it does get better every day you go to work. I cried at least 5 times if not more the first day I went back. You can do it!!

Cathy - posted on 11/07/2009

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It is really hard and you both will cry, but someone once told me to think about the big picture: she will grow up knowing that women can have careers, that their work is important, and she will learn that people can go away for a bit but they come back (object permanence) so she will learn trust. the other thing i focus on because my son is with his dad half of the time so i feel like i have even less time with him, is i try to make all the moments i DO have him count. if i have a choice between getting a chore done while he plays on the computer or being with him, i'll ask him to play a game, or do something together. its the quality of the time together, not the quantity.

Jillian - posted on 11/07/2009

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I am feeling the same way...I start back to work on Monday after 12 weeks off. I visited the daycare I will be using last Thursday and cried the whole evening after! I haven't even left him there yet!! What (I'm hoping) will help me is that this daycare has a webcam so I can login and see him any time I want during the day. But it's good to know that I am not the only one that feels this distraught over it.

Cassie - posted on 11/06/2009

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It will get easier. Just make sure you really trust this person. And if anything call and check on your little one during your work breaks. My daughter has been going to daycare for 2 months now and I still call 2 everyday to checl on her.

Amanda - posted on 11/06/2009

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Y dont u try working from home so u dont have to miss any milestones or having ur child around other sick kids!I'm a single mom, I was so tired of living paycheck to paycheck and off the gov't.I joined a team of moms who get work from home and earn an awesome income with no selling,Im so excited!!!!!!!!! I love the store. We are always looking for new moms as partners. If you are interested leave your info at my website.Have a wonderful weekend! Amanda http://www.workathomeunited.com/greenage...

Hannah - posted on 11/04/2009

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my daughter is 7 months old and i just went back to work. the truth is that waiting longer won't make it any easier to leave them. and you will miss them all the time. she stays with my mom while i am at work so it is comforting to know she is in good hands, but i still call like every 2 hours to check on her. i know its hard, but you'll be ok

Leslie-Ann - posted on 11/04/2009

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Maybe if you could leave the baby with a family member you would feel much better about having to leave him/her.

Arlene - posted on 11/04/2009

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I will be facing the same situation next year and family members have suggested starting to leave them for an hour at a time and go up from there as a way to get started before the big 8 our drop of day.....

Nazia - posted on 11/04/2009

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i wasnt looking forward to going back to work either but i knew i had to. the first day wasn't so bad and it went by quickly. But when i got home and saw my baby after the whole day i realized how much i missed him! Its been 3 months back at work now and its much better, you get into your routine. I can't wait until the weekends when i can be with my son all day long, taking him everywhere with me =) Its hard in the beginning but you'll get through it!

Jill - posted on 11/04/2009

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I'm in your same situation. At the end of the month, I return to work, also. I cried the whole week before returning with my first child. I'm already getting sad when I just think about my time being almost over! It's going to be hard to leave them again!

[deleted account]

I'm sorry you feel sad, but i would be more concerned if you didn't. Of course you will miss your lo, but for reasons known to you the decision has been made that you must return to work now. If you can't swing any more time by sacraficing some extras for another month or two then make arrangments with a provider you trust and start following your schedule. Call home on breaks to check on LO and allow some time when you get home attheend of your workday to just hold and cuddle.

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