Managing Time

Shawn - posted on 10/20/2010

I work 12 hour nights and my husband days. I use alot of routines. Not just for the kids but myself as well. I have my list of essentials that I must do every day. Unload and reload the dishwasher, do 1 load of laundry, get the kids to do a 15 minute tidy ect. We try to eat as a family every night. My kids are 4,5 and 9. My middle child is autistic so can be demanding and I have to make time for transitions ect. Something gives and sometimes its the house usually dusting or time with my husband. If everything goes the way it should then I have it down. However nothing always works. We just got over everyone being sick. I use everyone and everybody. My daughter wants to cook so I will fold laundry she (the nine year old) stirs something on the stove. Cooking I take short cuts. Use already cut vegs for stir fry. Roast in crock pot, Make a huge batch and freeze ect. No matter what on Friday nights, we are not doing anything but watching a movie as a family and ordering pizza. My son has a sleep disorder so I am up alot with him when not at work. I used to feel guilty if I put cartoons on for him at 4am but he can't help it and he can't fall back to sleep. Now it is our time together. We keep the house quiet and I will cuddle him up and do homework while he watches cartoons. Working out for me needs to be a family affair. Don't get a chance to do it by myself so walking, biking ect. And sometimes I just collapse in bed and wonder what the heck am I doing?

Mel - posted on 10/19/2010

I know exactly how you feel. I run a full time, 12-hour a day restaurant starting at 11 AM everyday. I keep losing nannies because I am so demanding of them and my son is super hyper and requires tons of attention. So this week for example, my 20 month old and I wake up at 7, do potty time and pick out school clothes (pre-kinder) and we decide what we will have for breakfast. He needs to hit the shower by 8 to I can hit the shower and be ready too by 9 which is when we leave for school. The school thing is great in a sense that it forces me to get up and out early and I have the morning to run errands. I have recently downsized my staff significantly and now wear MANY hats in the restaurant so I pretty much have no rest time. My nanny quit on Monday so my sister's nanny is taking care of my son in the afternoons and my dad in the evenings until I get out of work. I am forcing myself to take an hour break or so in the mid-late afternoons so I can clean house so my husband and son don't come home to a nasty home. We try to have dinner together (a really late dinner) but usually can't. I have to force my son to bed every night and when he is finally down, I try to wait up for my husband who owns and run a boutique resort an hour away. By the time my poor husband gets home, we can barely say two words to each other because we are so exhausted. My husband is up and out by 7-8 AM for another long day. The only time I feel even remotely close to a home body is when my son goes to school and I don't have errands to run. That way I can make a huge pot of stew or something and have enough for a few days for our dinner at night.....and.....as if we don't have enough on our plate, we just found out we are pregnant....the same week we sign the contracts for a new distributorship! Woo hoo! I could use ANY help in the time management department. And to make things even worse, over the last few weeks my son started with nightmares wakes up almost 4 times and night and I have wake up with him and console him back to sleep, then he wakes up for the morning at 5 AM unless I can coax him back to bed. So I have not had uninterrupted sleep in well, I can't remember. I feel like I am running on empty but have to keep going. This Sunday, all out of nowhere my husband entertains my son for the morning and lets me sleep in. I got breakfast in bed and two extra hours of sleep and I cannot describe how amazing I felt that day. I could have thanked him enough. If I can get that every so often I think I might be able to maintain my sanity. But please, any suggestions on getting everything done without running myself down completely so I can still have time to be the fun-loving mom my son deserves would be GREATLY appreciated!

Marcy - posted on 10/19/2010

I go running with my friend 3 times per week at 5AM...its the only time that I can do it. Also, I have a cleaning lady every other week and I would rather starve than not have her....(okay, that is a little over the top but not by much). In regards to cooking here is my philosophy...cook once, eat at least twice. if I make chicken and rice I double batch it and half goes in the freezer for the following week. I also use my crock pot a few times per week. I make a batch of meatballs one time per month and divide them and freeze them. Toss them in the crock pot with sauce on low and when you get home make the pasta and a bagged salad and call it a day. Your kiddo will sleep through the night soon..promise! At night my hubby does the dishes and cleans up and I do bath duty. Then we switch and I get lunches ready for the next day and he plays with our son. After that its about 8 or so and its bedtime. We do stories and then bed and typically I go to bed around the same time since I have to get up early. Good luck....

Jane - posted on 10/19/2010

I understand that your husband doesn't come home until later, but can't HE help more? Why are you doing all the cooking and cleaning, etc? Is there a gym near you that is open early where you could go swimming or to the gym before work? Otherwise an exercise DVD or a Wii Fit are both good at home alternatives. So your husband would look after the little one whilst you go to do your work out and then either he could take them to whatever your child care arrangements are or, if you have time, you could do it after your work out. OR look for a gym that has a creche where you can leave you child to play with others whilst you work out.

But I definitely think that your husband should help more with the household chores!!

Good Luck!