Modesty around your son. When did this become such an issue?

Teresa - posted on 12/01/2011

If my 7 year old son is in my room and I'm changing it's no big deal. We do have bathroom privacy, because there are things I have to do that I don't want anyone to see really. I see him naked, of course, and he sees me naked, or parts of me and it hasn't been an issue YET.

Kate - posted on 11/30/2011

Emma i have a 16 year old son who still takes bath with me and seldom sees me getting dressed.So its just about how comfortable you feel when you are nude in front of your kids.I seriously have no issues being nude.But of late i have started covering up myself in front of my son because he started asking questions about masturbation
.

Lillie - posted on 11/27/2011

Regarding the modesty issue, my son has never reacted to seeing a woman breastfeeding her baby in public. He doesn't sit & stare as if he's never seen a breast before. It's just normal & natural to him. When at the pool (or anywhere else for that matter!) he doesn't sit and stare at women in skimpy bikinis and doesn't notice breasts falling out of a too-low-cut blouse. Rather, he notices women that have themselves covered up and remarks on what a lovely blouse, dress, etc they have on. Why? Because this is how I dress. I wear modest clothing. He is learning that "modest is hottest" in the fashion sense. My three older children are the same way. They've never dressed in a risque manner because they believe in covering themselves in public. To them, there is no mystery and they don't need to expose themselves to others.

Denikka - posted on 11/24/2011

I have a 2.5yr old boy and a 10mo old girl.
Currently, I have no problem with either of them seeing me naked, I will occasionally shower with them and my daughter, in NO way shape or form, wants to allow me to close ANY door on her at ANY time XD My son just doesn't currently care.
I do think that there is a fine line between teaching that the naked human body is a natural thing, and teaching privacy.
I don't go out of my way to avoid nudity in front of my children, but I do expect them to respect my privacy when I want them to.
The general rule this far has been that if I leave the door open, it's okay to come in. Whatever I happen to be doing. If the door is closed, they are NOT allowed in and must wait until I'm done whatever I'm doing and leave the room. I think that will continue to be the rule as they get older. And that will extend to conversation as well. If the door is closed, you wait until I leave unless it's an emergency. I don't really want to have a conversation about PB&J while I'm sitting on the toilet XD That can wait an extra 5 minutes.

Charlie - posted on 11/23/2011

My 10 year old really doesn't care, he'll stroll into my room and hand me the phone, ask me where his glasses are (evidently because i'm the one who wore them last!) or even to tell me that the peanut butter is finished (obviously expecting me to replace it right that second).

It's like he doesn't even acknowledge it, Because for him it just "is" and much like Mair Millers son, mine is the first one to be spotted around the house in his birthday suit.

@ Bevely Armand... Your 7 year old doesn't WANT you to see him naked??? Who washes his back?

My oldest is 10 years old and the number of times he's had issues with his "gentleman" over the years is unbelievable, but he feels comfortable telling me. If at 7 yor son is already uncomfortable with being naked infront of you... His own mother, who can/will/does he turn to with any little issue he may have???

Bevely - posted on 06/09/2011

My son is 7, he knows the basics of anatomy, but I am not going to let him see me naked. I won't change in front of him, unless it is like a camping emergency, then he has to face the other way. I just think it is important that we respect each others privacy, he doesn't want me to see him naked either.

TealRose - posted on 06/06/2011

I am a 56 yr old grandmother and we showered, bathed, changed etc ... together. Both my husband and I. Bodies are normal we were all born naked and we didn't want them thinking we had to hide or there was something either 'weird' about bodies or to be ashamed. The children only started to cover up when they were around preteen age and we respected that and were less likely to be 'caught' naked in the corridor from the bathroom! However, if they wanted the loo and we were in the shower they always came in and no one was embarrassed or 'damaged for life' ! Quite the opposite ! My grandchildren are now 5 & 2 a boy and girl, and we shower together sometimes and it's 'normal' for them. When they are tiny they ask questions and it's a great opportunity to explain about 'different' body parts! After that ... they don't worry any more !

Mair - posted on 03/30/2011

Well I was similar to your friend but I wouldnt say so far as to be embarrassed I just wont be nude in front of my now 7 yr old son. I have been in underwear and bra (which to me is just like a bikini) but not fully nude IDK why It bothers me but on the other end of the spectrum I have no problems with him seeing nudity on tv etc. when he is old enough I would be the first to take him to a nude art class. As an artist I think the human form is beautiful but I also felt I had to set some boundaries. I dont think your wrong for being nude in front of yuor boys I think this is one of those things where its such a personal choice within parenting that each person will have their own ideas. As long we as parent make our children aware that thier bodies are thiers while still allowing them to feel "free" and comfortable in their own selves so to speak nude or not it shouldnt matter.

oddly enough I wont walk around nude in from of my son but he is the first to go streaking through the house lol I just laugh to myself and remind him just not to do that when company is around lol

Stephanie - posted on 03/29/2011

HMMMM well first of all I am the mother of three and personally i dont find anything wrong with the human body male or female. Honestly when my children were babies/ toddlers I would take put them in the bath tub with me 1. because i loved that and 2 because most of the time they wouldnt let you take a bath by yourself in the first place.

I have 2 sons and 1 daughter.

as a child i remember my mother walking from her room to the bathroom in the mornings naked..Personally i wish she would not have done that.. Dad didnt do it and she wouldnt have let him. I wasnt allowed to walk around naked and neither were my two sisters or my two brothers. I am going to say that Yes I believe that its important to use a certain amount of modesty around your children. I would ask if your children went to another childs house and came back telling you that his or her mom and dad changed their clothes in front of them.. how would you feel then. I mean a nude body is a nude body. To me its about respect and privacy.. everyone is entitled to it and that includes children. Modesty does not have to mean being ashamed of the human body..its not a negative. I remember my eldest son use to stay with my mother while I worked nights he was around 5 . He told me one morning that grandma walked around naked in front of him...honestly i got mad at her about this and confronted her about it. Today he is 23 and if you bring that up he makes this horrific face and says "dear lord what was up with her?"

see he never told her anything when he was a child she just assumed it was cool and maybe he wouldnt remember but to this day he does and its not a good memory for him. He cringes when its brought up. and my sister did the same with her son who is now 22 and he also says that he remembers that made him feel funny ( note that my sister was and is still a very beautiful well built woman today) I dont know I dont think we should just assume they want to see us walking around nude or being naked for whatever reason in front of them.And I do believe that there is a cut off age for that. I have a 16 year old daughter and have many times opened the door to her room when she was changing and she will say "hey I am getting dressed in here" and believe me she is not ashamed of body she just wants her privacy and she doesnt want me stripping down to the bare bottom around her.. and if one of her brothers would even think they could walk in there and hold a conversation well they had better have their duck and run skill down.

its funny i had a mother that walked about like Lady Godiva in the morning but i never could talk to her about intimate things and I as a mother took a more "modest"

road as my children got too old (in my opinion) to see me nude and they are very comfortable about talking with me about things i could have never with my mother. and they knew the differences between male/female bodies without me or daddy being "show and tell". So just my opinion unless you live in a nudist community.. I would say yes it becomes an issue after a certain age...

Rebecca - posted on 03/29/2011

My son is about to be three and his father feels the same way about him not being in there when I get dressed. It is not a huge deal to me because he is young and he knows no better. When he starts to go to school is probably when I will draw the line on him coming into the room with me while I am using the restroom or getting a shower/changed. While they are this young, all they are worried about is being with you or telling you what they have to say.

Aliska - posted on 03/29/2011

It all depends on how you feel about being naked. I'm not that bothered and my kids (daughters 16 & 12 and son 15) regularly see me get dressed and undressed and it's no big deal for any of us, we don't let a bit of naked flesh get in the way of a conversation! I don't care that they come in and talk to me if I'm getting dressed and they aren't bothered or embarased at all. I take my cues from them in regards to walking in on them naked. My oldest couldn't care less about the rest of the family seeing her naked, the other two are more conservative but don't mind you coming in if you have a good reason too. Everyone feels differently about this, there is no correct answer, do what feels right for you and your kids.

♥TIA♥ - posted on 03/29/2011

Well, to me it didn't seem like a big deal. But my husband is making it that way. So between sister and brother and mother and son. We are already keeping that respect boundary as to not be exposed. After all, if he goes to school and thinks it's okay with his older sister and his grown mom, what of a teacher that you look up to like a mom? That's when it should also be considered and known about right and wrong touching.

Kristie - posted on 03/29/2011

I think it depends on the kid. You'll know when he is too old because he will be embarrassed. A boy who is too old to see his mom naked, does not want to see his mom naked. LOL

Amy - posted on 03/29/2011

Emma, I don't know how old your kids are but I have a five year old son and a one year old daughter. I'm lucky if I can sneak away from my son to use the bathroom without him coming in to tell me something! I would love a little privacy but I don't see hit happening anytime soon, lol. My personal opinion is that at some point they are going to be exposed to the human body, even if I was modest my son would of known that boys and girls were different because he helps out with his sister like changing diapers and giving baths. If moms are able to get dressed in the day without there kids being right there I think that's fantastic and I'm slightly jealous. It doesn't matter to me I would rather answer my questions open and honestly. I would also like to add that when I was pregnant with my daughter my son went to ever doctor appointment with us, I felt like it was important that he have an attachment to his sister before she arrived and we all know that the little sheets they give us to cover don't really cover a whole lot, lol.

Liz - posted on 03/29/2011

My son is abit older now(nearly 9) so things are a little bit less relaxed but it just depends on how comfortable you are. Just the other week i took my son to the local pool during my lunch break for abit of mom son bonding time. When we got out is was really busy and i needed to get back to work so instead of hanging around for 2 cubicles he came in with me. There was no pointing giggling or anything like that we changed out of our swimsuits. I just think that its really nice to have a relationship with your son that you feel comfortable to do that in that situation.