Pre-School Nightmare

Stacie - posted on 10/24/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I am a mom who just put my 3 1/2 year old son is a daycare/preschool program. The facility is owned by a neighbor of mine who decided to give me a break since my husband and I own a business out of our home. This is only his 3rd week. The first week, he seemed excited about going and did not want to leave at the end of the day. The second week he got very sick and I kept him home to get him well. This is his 3rd week and when I took him in he clung to me and cried very hard for me not to leave him. Something he never does. But I just figured it was because he missed a week and just allowed him time to get back adjusted to being there. Monday when i picked him up, one of the worker talked a little rough towards him but did it in a semi joking way. I looked at her and once she saw my expression she got quiet. I left. Tuesday morning, my son ran and threw his backpack in his cubby and once again clung to me sobbing for me not to leave him. I stayed till he was calm and watching tv with the other kids and then attempted to leave. I made it out the door before i heard him start to cry again. I turned to check on him and saw a 1 year old baby walking to the door. She opened it and started walking out. I tried to tell her to go back in but she just stood there. The worker came to the door and took her by the hand and led her back in. Since my son had gotten quiet again I started walking down the stairs. I turned back to give him one more look when I was shocked to see the worker spanking the 1 year old! Now I know that some of the workers also bring their children to this daycare so I assumed this was her child. I went back in and checked on my son who was now into the tv show and calm. I went to my car and called my husband to tell him what I saw very upset. The director, my neighbor was not there yet and I had scheduled an appointment that I could not cancel but could not shake the uneasy feeling. I left going to my appointment but called the director on the way and let her know everything. She said she would check into it immediately and call me back. She did and brushed it off to a misunderstanding saying the worker and witnesses (other workers) say she only tapped the child! I know what I saw and this did not fly with me. I turned around and went to pick up my son. The worker apologized to me and tried to convince me of what she wanted me to see. I have not slept all night.

and after talking with my husband found my son a new daycare. Now I dread telling the director my decision because she is a friend and a really nice person, but I cant have my child somewhere i don't feel he he is safe. Stressed on the entire situation.

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5 Comments

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Ashley - posted on 10/25/2012

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You did the right thing. Your neighbor should respect your standards for your kid. They're lucky you haven't reported them. I would.

Stacie - posted on 10/25/2012

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Thank you ladies. I went back the next day and told her I could not bring him back. She was very nice and understanding which helped but now my son is at a new facility with cameras so I can watch him from home. So glad it ended well. Now maybe I can rest. Keeping my fingers crossed anyway!!

Danielle - posted on 10/25/2012

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I would have done the same. There are some daycares that have live feed for parents to log in online and you can watch what is happening at any time throughout the day. I went through a bunch of nannies in two weeks, one every day or two, until i found one that seemed "good enough" for my baby. (first time paranoid mom) It took me 6 months to leave my nanny at the house by herself with my son. I always took them both for a car ride to my appointments. Fortunately I worked from home most of the time. She should be understanding of your feelings. Stick with your gut feeling, otherwise your mind will never be on work, but on worries about your little ones well being. Your doing the right thing.

Amy - posted on 10/24/2012

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Oh and it's normal for children to cry when being left by a parent. It's best to make good-byes as quick as possible, and don't try to sneak out. You should always be able to call the teacher during the day to see how they are doing. My daughter went to daycare for the first time yesterday, she's 2 1/2 and she cried but stopped within a minute of me leaving, if I had tried comforting her she would of gone on a lot longer.

Amy - posted on 10/24/2012

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You have to do what's in the best interest of your child. I don't spank my children at home so I would be livid even if I found out my daycare provider "tapped" my child. Just be up front and honest that you felt very uncomfortable based on what you saw, she can not take it personal.

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