Relationship deteriorating!!! Please Help!!!

Megan - posted on 05/17/2017 ( 1 mom has responded )

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Where to begin? im a part time retail employee and a full time mom to a 1.5 year old. My boyfriend ( daughters dad) works a bar manager and works long crazy hours. He the breadwinner of the family he pays for 97% of our bills. I pay what I can but my checks only come out to about 250 biweekly. I do everything as far as house cleaning, cooking, laundry, you name it. He has grown so much resentment towards me about our financial situation, he blames me for us struggling. I have explained to him many times that putting her in daycare is far too expensive and I would basically be working just to pay for her daycare so why pay someone else to watch my daughter when I wouldn't be making any extra money. Anyway, the past month our relationship has completely deteriorated to the point where he says he's single and I was looking for an apartment to move into. We have still lived in the same house this past month and even sleep in the same bed some nights. It's so confusing though he tells me he loves me every time he leaves for work and looks at me like he wants to kiss me or if he does kiss me he says "but don't hold it against me". We have days we get along like old times but then he goes out with his friends the next day, gets wasted and passes out at a "friends" house but won't tell whose house. He says he won't tell me whose house cause he thinks I'm gonna call them up to check on him. But in my mind I can't help but think he's seeing someone else because why not tell me where you were when you always have in the past. He says he wants to be alone, he just wants to focus on work and our daughter. He swears up and down he doesn't want to be single just to sleep around. He doesn't want me to move out though , he just wants to be able to do what he wants without having me "bitch" at him. I know this must be confusing but I could really use some guidance. I do love him and want to save our relationship but I'm afraid we're too bad off to mend it. I don't know if he wants to.

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Ev - posted on 05/18/2017

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It sounds like you both could benefit from some sort of couple's or relationship counseling. You do have a child together and it may be that with some help in counseling you can maintain your lives together. It is much harder to raise children apart but it is done all the time. You do not really know why he is doing this because it does not sound like he tells you anything.

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