Son has been sick and been getting a hard time at work.

Stephanie - posted on 09/24/2009 ( 10 moms have responded )

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My son has been sick a few times and I have had to call in sick to work. I always did it with as much notice as possible. They knew i had a baby and that with my husbands job (drill sergent) I would have to be the one to stay home when he got sick. I found out yesteryday that the hosptial had an opening for my son's surgery on Monday, so of course I told them as soon as I could. However, I still got the heavy sighs and other non-verbal, passive agressive reactions. I can find another job.....my son is forever.

10 Comments

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Christina - posted on 09/29/2009

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Always put your children first. Its hard when you get a hard time a work. I get the same treatment. I ignore it the best I can. I am very up front and open and say if my child is sick I will be there for them. If you work with other women they should understand your point. Its sad if they don't stick up for you.

Traci - posted on 09/28/2009

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I'm curious to know, if you don't mind answering, is it your manager who is giving the 'heavy sighs and other passive aggressive reactions', or is it just other co-workers?

I ask because if it's just other co-workers I wouldn't even worry at all what they think of the situation. It's none of their business. If it's a manager, well, that's pretty unprofessional to act in that way if you ask me. But as long as they are still giving you the time you need without any real hassles, then I would just try to let the reactions roll off your back. As long as you are following your workplace policies regarding time off and letting them know as far in advance as possible, then you have absolutely nothing to feel bad about. Your #1 priority is your son and your workplace should be understanding of that.

Sometimes people just feel the need to complain or be the fairness police. I had a co-worker complain when, during my 2nd pg, I was coming in late and/or leaving early because I had pretty severe morning sickness (read "all day sickness"). My work was still getting done on time and it was not being pushed to anyone else. I just sometimes needed to leave early because I just couldn't handle any more that day. But this co-worker felt the need to complain even though she knew I was pg and knew I was feeling sick all the time. I couldn't believe it.

Anyway, don't let your workplace bother you and best wishes to your son for a speedy recovery.

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We all want people to understand our needs and so does your workplace. they have every right to feel strained from the strain of your absence, however, they cannot make you feel guilty about it because you have the right to put your child first. Simply do want you need to do within your rights. You need to balance things because you need your job I am guessing and your son needs you versus the fact that your work needs you. Try to let them know that you understand that your absence may be felt but that the situation cannot be helped and that you are willing to be flexible with your workload if they have any ideas, such as working from home, so that you can manage your time. It is better to get what you want with honey than bees. Good Luck to you and stay strong. Do what you need to do for yourself and your family. Everythingelse will fall into place if you keep your friends and support close by.

We've all been there.

Stephanie - posted on 09/26/2009

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Thank you for all of the advice, I put the FMLA on my to read list this weekend. You have all helped me get over the quilty feeling. I really appreciate it!!!

Toni - posted on 09/26/2009

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I dont know where you live but they have this thing called Family Medical Leave Act, you should ask someone about it asap :) hope this helps, this will protect your job.

Darlene - posted on 09/25/2009

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Don't worry about it, I've been there. I had to take a lot of time off when my son was little because he had one ear infection after another, surgeries, etc. I think they get like that because there's not much they can do about it. As long as you're keeping up with your work and doing what you're supposed to be doing, you will be fine. Are you using sick days, vacation days, without pay? Just curious because once you use all of these it could be a different situation. However, there is always FMLA... Don't be afraid to use it, that's what it's there for and it protects your job. You are absolutely right....your child comes first. There will always be other jobs, but I do understand how stressful it can be to be out of work! Good luck and try and get past the guilt!

Jennifer - posted on 09/25/2009

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I tottally understnd for I have a son who is always sick and in/out of hospital. You did the right thing by telling them as soon as you knew. I have always been lucky and had employers who understood. If they ever told me no I would tell them goodbye for a job is replacable your child is not! Good luck with your childs surgry.

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They knew you had children from the beginning. You cant help if your child gets sick. At least you have a real reason your calling in, some people call in sick when they are hung over or whatever. As long as you have Drs notes for the absences there isnt anything they can do about it, at least thats how it is where I work. I have a really great boss though, she has a child of her own and she always says that shes taking off work if her child is sick so she cant blame us if we do. Your right you can find another job your child is forever and his health is way more important than a job.

Zakeana - posted on 09/24/2009

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Sorry work is being a Pain! I work in Human Resources and can only imagine that when someone comes to me and lets me know that their son is going in for SURGERY! i would be as supportive as possible and slap the manager upside the head cuz they are just DUMB sometimes!



I hope the surgery goes well and the recovery is speedy! (obviously so that you can get back to work;))

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