Stay at Home Moms versus. Working Moms

Sunny - posted on 12/22/2010 ( 22 moms have responded )

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There is always a big question as who's lifestyle is more easier: stay at home moms or working moms? It is for sure that both types of
mothers work very hard, but what is better for a woman, to stay at home with kids, or to work is very hard to determine. So let's dig a little
deeper and find out all the pluses and minuses for staying at home or working while being a mom. Anyone who has
children,http://treasurestrove.com/index.php?topi...

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Candi - posted on 12/29/2010

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Some moms prefer to stay at home. Some moms prefer to work outside the home. Children tend to thrive in happy environments. Thus, there is a potential advantage to the children if mom works outside the home . . . if that makes the mom a happier mom.

Some moms who prefer to stay at home simply do not have that option. Working outside the home is not engaged in so as to buy that next Lexus or keep up with the Joneses, it is engaged in to put the next meal on the table or to keep a roof over the family’s heads. Children tend to thrive in environments in which their basic needs are met.

A working mom is not necessarily putting work ahead of her children: she may be working to help support and care for her children. Thus, working is not inconsistent with putting her children first in her life.

Studies have shown that children of working moms will do better on social and cognitive tests than will their counterparts raised by stay-at-home moms IF those children of working mom have been placed in high quality childcare.

The guilt associated with perceived child abandonment or neglect must be wrestled with by ferreting out the logic in the emotion. The maternal instinct to nurture children is powerful, but nurturing must be construed to include providing those children with shelter, food, and the materials the children need to attend to their daily lives. These objects are achieved, many times, by moms working outside the home

In all aspects of life, there are trade-offs. Moms experience a number of trade-offs when choosing to stay at home or work outside the home. One of the primary trade-offs in that choice is income to fund the family or time with the family. It is a difficult decision that each mom must make based on her own unique circumstances. Let us each make the decision that we feel is best for our families, and let us each validate the choices of other. By doing so, everyone wins: moms, children, and society. http://blog.nannies4hire.com/stay-at-hom...

Shannon - posted on 12/27/2010

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I agree with Sharon and believe that what works for one family might not work for the other. I really wanted to stay home more and work only part time but we learned quickly that because I am the "bread winner" at this point in time, we can not afford for me to stay home most of the time and work part time. I believe my daughter did not suffer from this one bit. I put in the best daycare/ preschool in town which is pretty expensive but worth every penny. She gets the social skills she needs and she is very smart. I felt we were blessed with an "easy" baby, she never had "separation anxiety" or trouble sleeping at night, getting rid of the bottle was a breeze, potty training, sleeping in her own crib and then her own bed. I feel that if she was born differently I would have def, made accomadations to stay home more with her. I am with her as soon as we get home, take her to school and every weekend we spend all the time we can together. I feel that this was the best choice for us.

[deleted account]

It's really a personal choice to do what is best for your family. Quite frankly, I am getting sick of this debate because there is no singular right or no singular wrong answer. Every family dynamic and situation is different. What works for one family may be completely different for another. I personally enjoy working and it's my career. I did not achieve a higher education beyond a Master's Degree and not put it to use. I love teaching-period. (Although there are some days where I question myself!) I had a wonderful opportunity when my son was younger to take on a 3 day a week teaching position and it was a perfect schedule. Now he is in school full-time and I returned to full time teaching just last year. But if you want to extend the debate, visit the Debating Mums board.

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Anne - posted on 08/12/2012

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I am work at home mom, enjoying fulfilling all the responsibilities of motherhood and taking good care of my kids and providing them proper nourishment.

Debra - posted on 01/18/2012

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If you start work in a traditional business you will be trading a unit of time for a unit of money. It is my belief, you and every other working mom is a much more valuable asset to themselves, and others by having the luxury of time to personally raise their children. In my opinion, mothers are an integral part of our countries foundation.



I have a Great Opportunity for Independent, Self-motivated Team Players! You can earn immediate cash today while building residual income for retirement tomorrow! Our sensational Video Emailing concept is taking the Internet by storm. By sharing it with others, you can stop trading time for dollars and get on the Path to Prosperity and Time Freedom.



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Lika - posted on 01/05/2011

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My fiance is the "new" stay at home dad, and takes care of the home schooling. It's a huge help for me, that we have this split in what we do. I think when everyone works as a family unit, any situation can work.

Amy - posted on 01/05/2011

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Lika, it is awesome! And there are more and more stay at home dads. It makes being a working mom that much easier knowing who is watching our kids.

Sarah - it is hard but for me it's so worth it! I would really miss working and being out of the house, housework isn't too bad, and as kids get older you can slowly have them help. Also, even a stay at home parent can't and shouldn't be expected to get all the house work done.

Sarah - posted on 01/05/2011

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I repsect working moms so much! They have to work a job, and then come home and clean their house. I would be exhausted! lol Anyways, I stay at home...would go to work if I had to. I think it all depends on whats best for each individual family.

Lika - posted on 01/05/2011

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Amy, I think it's heart warming that your husband is a stay at home dad. In some ways, it's harder, because they're a minority. On the other hand, it's kind of cool, because you get to see the father/child bond that is pretty rare.

Amy - posted on 01/04/2011

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a Stay at Home parent is a job just like any other one a working parent would do. Both are a lot of work and both are very rewording. It depends on the family's situation and parent's personalities.

My husband is a stay at home dad because it actually is cheaper for him to stay at home rather than work a job, it also gives him a chance to work towards getting his degree. I on the other hand could NEVER be a stay at home parent, I would miss my work too much, not to mention it would hurt my career. Because my husband hasn't graduated yet and didn't even like what he was doing it won't hurt him at all.

Lika - posted on 01/03/2011

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I guess it depends on the situation. When my son was born, I wanted to stay home, but we really couldn't afford it. So I worked part time as a substitute teacher.

If it's not an affordability thing, it's the choice of the couple. There's pros and cons to both. As a stay at home mom, you're more in control over what your kids eat, more involved with stuff like PTA, cheap/free field trips when school is out, etc. When you work, you can maybe upgrade what your kids eat, or feel like you're contributing to the household. There is no right answer.

Some moms love being at home, other moms like the challenge of juggling the different tasks. Other moms work out of necessity, and it's not good to judge because we don't know what the situation is. Plus what's good for me is NOT what's good for every other mom.

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Leslie: I'm so sorry you feel that way. It is an illusion though. I started my business and quit a decent paying job that made me miserable at the height of the recession. I have a child to feed and bills to pay just like everyone else. I had no financial cushion to fall back on, only the knowledge that if it didn't work I'd go out and get another job. If I didn't try though, I'd feel just like you.

Leslie - posted on 01/02/2011

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My mother did not had a chose and I do not eather it is work or live on the street with our children. my mom had to work two jobs just to keep a roof over our heads and food in our stomches.

Julie - posted on 12/30/2010

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I think it's personnal choice and what works for you and your family. And you shouldn't feel pressured into one particular choice. I am a full time working mum, it pays the bills and provides the ocassional treat, but I pay the price by not being able to do the school run and after school and quality time with my daughter. But then on the flip side, my sister is a stay at home mum and envies the fact that i work and the ocassional treat it brings. so it really does depend on what you need to do for you and your family.

Missy - posted on 12/30/2010

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I really don't understand the whole debate on which is best soley from staying at home or working. Being a parent comes down to so much more than just this. I agree that it should be what's best for your family. Everyone's situation is different. I know both SAHM and WM's whose children are thriving and some of each whose children are not. I personally have been a full-time working mom for 3 1/2 yrs, a SAHM for 10 yrs and a part-time working mom for the past 4 yrs. I didn't become a SAHM until my second baby was born. It was what was easiest for our family with my husband's crazy hours and call-outs. I loved being home with my kids when they were babies but it was hard living on one income-very hard. I also missed working and feeling a sense of accomplishment from that. However, now I'm working part-time and all my kids are in school so that is the best of both worlds to me. As my kids get older I will probably eventually go back to full-time just to help pay for college. Each decade there is different needs so I do different things. From what I've seen the parents that have the most well-adjusted kids are the parents that take the time to actually play and be present with their kids whether they work or not.

[deleted account]

@Leslie: Everyone has a choice. Not everyone has built the courage to do what they want, but the opportunity is there. Going into business for yourself is a 15 minute/$35 process at the Clerk's office.

Heather - posted on 12/29/2010

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I agree. Some stay at home moms would love to get a part time job and get out of the house, and some moms (like myself) who work 50 hours a week would love to work less hours. Others are perfectly happy with their decision. I loved staying at home with my daughter for 4 months, but returning to work, although I cried every day for the first month, was necessary financially and did wonders for getting me back in shape. (I'm a restaurant manager.) I am hoping that the next time I go out on ML, it will be a little easier to return knowing that the two kids are together.

Danielle - posted on 12/28/2010

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im kind of half and half. i stay home with my son all day, until 430pm when i head off to work. but i do agree, that each family situation is different and therefore different things work for them.

Savitha - posted on 12/26/2010

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i can't sit @ home and become a home maker... i hv to work so that i can full fill the basic need of my 3yr old daughter..... u hv to enjoy wat ever u do...........

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