am i the only one??

Ashleigh - posted on 10/28/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I turned 20 years old 4 days after my son was born. throughout my pregnancy i had preeclampsia, placenta previa, and incompetent cervix, and group b strep.. i was hospitalized at 28 weeks for preterm labor and almost lost my son. i spent 22 days in the hospital tyring to stabalize myself. when i was realised on july 6th, i was sent home on strict bedrest. my labor had to be stopped 5 times total before i had him. i went into the eval unit a week before he was born and i was laready 6cm and they sent me home. on aug 12th i went into the dr and had my biophsyical profiling done and i had a registered contraction and after it was over, his heart rate dopped dangeously low, so i was admitted for prolonged monitoring. the ended up inducing my labor which in turn only last for 5 hours. they started my pictocin at 7pm, broke my water at 8:30 and i got my epidural at 9pm when i was 8cm which never took. when i started my practice pushes, my sons heart rate kept dropping really bad, so i had no time for a delivery dose of medicine, and ended up doing it naturally.. i couldn't get him out on my own and they had to use the vacuum. while trying to get the vacuum on his head, the nurse stepped on the pedal on the floor and turned it on on accident and caught me and did alot of damage to me. he was born at 37 weeks, and was 5lbs 13ozs. it really upsets me when all these mom' sbrag about how perfecdt and fine their labor and everything was, and they take for garnite that they never had to think about losing their baby when i almost lost mine several times. and i wrong for being upset about this and being afraid to have more kids. i was already dilated to 2cm before i was 28 weeks..

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i wouldnt be so discouraged.. you have a blessing in your life now.. be thankful for that.. you got through it and so did your baby.. enjoy your baby dont be so negative towards others stories.. everyone is different.. i am sorry that your pregnancy and birth were hard.. i had an em c after 18 hrs of labor.. my son had a monitor in his head through my birth canal bc he was so stressed.. the vacuum didnt work!.. but still once he was out i was still in love with him and could have cared less about my own ordeal

Lindsay - posted on 10/28/2009

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I understand why you'd be upset about that. It doesn't sound pleasant at all.. but you can't blame the mothers that are happy and grateful for having a good delivery/labor, either.

Maurine - posted on 10/28/2009

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of course you're not the only one! i can think of several friends who have horrific pregnancy/labor/delivery stories to share. no matter what your experience is, labor is traumatic, and it changes you in more ways than you can ever say. my own pregnancies have been pretty uneventful, and my labors have all been healthy and relatively smooth. my first one my dr used a vacuum to get him out because his heartrate was dipping with each contraction. my third (latest) had the cord wrapped around his neck and was blue when he came out! that was a little frightening for me to see a little blue baby.
sounds like you really had a rough time of it, and it's so easy to compare stories and feel inadequate, no matter what the conditions are. but we're all in this together! i don't blame you for being scared to have another one, but every pregnancy and delivery is different. give yourself some time. seems like the only direction you can go is up. :) but there's no law that says you have to have a bunch of kids. you have to do what's right for you and your family. i'm amazed at how much you've been through!

Ashleigh - posted on 10/28/2009

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thank u very much. my sons cord was wrapped around his neck twice and he didnt even have enough to crown

Amelia - posted on 10/28/2009

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I won't say I know how you feel, because I don't. I had the ideal pregnancy with no complications. But I had a rough delivery. I went into labor on my own but my son couldn't handle the contractions. His heard rate dipped every time I had one and it worsened when I pushed. I had to have an emergency c-section and was scared out if my mind. It turns out he probably would have died if I had tried to push him out since his cord was short and wrapped around his neck more than once. So i think I understand a little piece of how you're feeling. After he was born I felt happy that he was healthy but like I had been cheated out of my dream birth. I felt like I failed as a woman because I couldn't safely deliver my baby the way nature intended. I wantched my best friend go thru much the same thing you described with my godson. Now she doesn't want to have more kids either because she's afraid. I think you just need to remember that you're allowed to feel however you feel and that there's nothing you could have done differently. Also remember that every pregnancy is different and if you choose to have more children you may have an easier time of it. But try not to be upset at other moms. They aren't trying to brag, they are just thankful they did not have to go thru the kind of difficult experience you described. How lucky your son is to have such a strong mom.

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