c section or vaginal?

Hanna - posted on 08/11/2009

Who told you this nonsense? You have 2 children and 3rd on the way -- you are definitely a woman and an amazing mother, i'm sure! i wouldn't worry about what other people say -- just like with raising your kids and with the way you run your household -- it's up to you, how you want to deliver the baby. you also have to consider what is the safest way to go about it for both you and the baby and if the first delivery had complications ended up in a C, and second one was a C, then 3rd one is probably safer the same way, for you and the baby. also, you have to take into account what your doctor feels most comfortable with -- very few doctors will let you labor after a C and ultimately, regardless of what we all wish for, the safest way to go is the one that your doctor feels most comfortable with because God forbid something happens, you want him to be able to get the baby out quickly and safely for you and the little one. so talk to your OB and see what he/she says and do it that way and forget what people think! if they're so pro-natural birth, then let them do it when they are ready to have a baby because last thing you want to do is to put your little one or yourself at risk because you want to prove to someone that you can do it. Good luck to you!

Amanda - posted on 08/11/2009

I had to have a C-section. No other choice for me. I wanted to do it the natural way but when my son's heart rate kept dropping every time I had a contraction, I knew I had no other choice. One question I do have to ask though, did your doctor tell you why you had to have a c-section. Mine did. It because my pelvis is too small even though I'm not a small girl. I didn't mind having a c-section cause I knew it was for the benefit of my baby. People are so critical anymore. Unless they have been what you been through then they need to keep their mouths shut.

Kerri - posted on 08/11/2009

i wouldnt say u wasnt a oman because you havent had a vaginal birth obvasuliy as what happend the first time i would feel very scared too if that happend to me yes it hurtssss vaginal but give it ago you recover so much more quicker

Holly - posted on 08/11/2009

There's a lot of doctors who won't even let you do a VBAC so obviously there are risks...no one should look down on you for trying to keep yourself and baby safe. I'm pregnant with my first child and choosing an elective c-section. No one can decide but you!

Samantha - posted on 08/11/2009

Also, I always was told that if you have a c-section you always have to have a c-section every time after. Is that true?

Samantha - posted on 08/11/2009

I really don't understand why anyone would make a big deal about Vaginal vs. C-section. It's still child birth and the important thing is that your baby comes out healthy! I'm 30 weeks pregnant with my first child and I'll do what I have to, to have my baby come out safely! It sounds like those women are the types to compete to see who had the worst labor and want to one-up everyone so they feel like they're so much better than everyone else. I'd like someone to try and say any of that to me, I'd pop them in the mouth! Birth is birth and the end result is what matters most!

Amanda - posted on 08/11/2009

Don't listen to what those people say. They aren't real women for telling you that because a real woman would offer support. I have only had one child and I wanted to have a vaginal birth but I did not dialate past four so I had a cesarian. I neglected to ask for my pain medication because I was laying down it didnt hurt all that much and I didnt want to be all druged up with my new son around. So I had to go to the bathroom one morning while I was still at the hospital and when I got out of bed, it was the worst pain I had ever felt in my life. I can't imagain how a vaginal birth would be more painful that that. You are a real woman for having 3 children and loving them.

Norma - posted on 08/11/2009

I had my first two children vaginal and my third was an emergency c-section because of pre-eclampsia. It didn't make me feel more like a mother having them vaginal. Being a mother is mostly raising them, not just having them. Who cares what people say or think, as long as you have healthy babies it doesn't matter how they come out.

Ashley - posted on 08/11/2009

I can't believe anyone would say you're not a woman if you don't 'give birth'. You're still giving birth, just in the best format for you and your children. I've had 2 vaginal births, the last one was almost an emergency C, and have had people say I 'haven't really given birth because I had an epidural with both'. Why the heck wouldn't I do what makes me most comfortable? I'm no masochist. So to each his own, if C's were easier for you and baby to get through, I say, more power to you! Who cares what anyone else thinks?

Francesca - posted on 08/11/2009

I have two children and i had to have them both by c section your are a mother regardless. if they come out of you then no one can tell you if you are or not a mother. some people cant have children vaginally like my self all of my children if i decide to have anymore will be two months early and that's not by choice i cant carry longer then that so unless that person have kids or doesn't have any they need to experience what happens when you have children.

Ashley - posted on 08/11/2009

Whoever told you that is absolutely wrong! I am a labor & delivery nurse. I would strongly weigh the consequences of attempting a vaginal birth. You have had 2 c-sections and that puts you at strong risk to rupture your uterine scar during labor. That could put you and your baby's lives in danger. I am not saying don't do it, but think about it and talk to your doctor first. I have seen it happen more than once and believe me it is terrifying.

Heather - posted on 08/11/2009

Saying c-sections make you less of a woman is like saying that women who can't have children are not real women, ridiculous. When we go through pregnancy and childbirth, we are putting our lives, as well as the lives of our babies in the hands of our doctors. Your doctor knows whats best for you, and if they recommend a c-section, its probably the safest bet. Good luck!

Samina - posted on 08/11/2009

no i havent been in this situation, but i wouldn't pay attention to any of those comments. Not all females can do the vaginal delivery and most of the ones who can, get epiderals and cant feel the real thing anyway. What makes you a woman, is not how you deliver your babies, its how you carry yourself and how grown and mature you are, and if your raising your kids on the right track and giving them a good life, then i would say your a wonderful Mom and a grown woman.

Samina - posted on 08/11/2009

no i havent been in this situation, but i wouldn't pay attention to any of those comments. Not all females can do the vaginal delivery and most of the ones who can, get epiderals and cant feel the real thing anyway. What makes you a woman, is not how you deliver your babies, its how you carry yourself and how grown and mature you are, and if your raising your kids on the right track and giving them a good life, then i would say your a wonderful Mom and a grown woman.

Wuanita - posted on 08/11/2009

wow that's really rude! i couldn't imagine telling a mother that! sheesh, i think you should do what you feel is right, it's your body and your children.

Alysa - posted on 08/11/2009

I had a csection and I now regret it kinda because I had a bad time with mine. I thought I was wonderwoman and thought I could do anything that the doctors told me NOT to do. My stitches ended up opening up and I had to heal inside out. It took me 5 months to heal perfectly but I'm indented (if that makes sense). I thought that I couldn't go through the pain either. One of my best friends had a vaginal birth and she said it was perfect. No pain... But everyones different. I wanted a csection for many reasons.

Sara - posted on 08/11/2009

I've not been in this situation, thankfully, but I did work in an OB/Gyn clinic for 3 years! I think childbirth is childbirth. Some women just can't do a vaginal delievery and sometimes there are complications for that a c-section is necessary. I do think that elective c-sections have become far to popular, childbirth is natural and I think that in a world like we live in today too many people schedule EVERYTHING and I think that when a child is born should be left up to God, or whoever/whatever you believe in. I do, however, believe that your case is necessary, in order to have a VBAC you have to have a physician that is comfortable with that decision and you really have to weigh the pros and cons for yourself, when it comes down to it it's your decision and what's best for you and your baby! If you can go to sleep at night knowing that you did the best you could and made the best decision you knew to make that is what is important..not everyone else!!

Briannan - posted on 08/11/2009

My daughter (my first and only so far) was an emergancy C-section. i went into labor knowing it was a possibility but i labored and she just wouldn't come down so after trying pitocin and breaking my water they went ahead and did the c section. i have no bitterness about it and i know i'm still a woman for having my girl! most people don't realize that a csection has more long term pain (my scar is still sensitive from the damage to the nerves), and it's major surgery that requires a long recovery. csections are just as painful as vaginal births if not more, so i wouldn't worry about what other people say. you are just as much of a woman no matter how the kids come out!

Penny - posted on 08/11/2009

i am 30 year old mother of 2 children...i also had a few complications delivering my first and had to have emergency c-section .....i planned to have a v-bac (vaginal birth after c-section) but due to my second baby being breach the whole third trimester i opted for a second c-section.....in my opinion it really don't matter how our babies get in to this world as long as they get here healthy ...you did the right thing and anyone who thinks otherwise ....is a rude and uneducated person ....vaginal birth does not define being a woman ....giving birth does and you have 3 babies so obviously you are a woman and a mother

Allie - posted on 08/11/2009

they thought that I was going to have a c section with my baby but I was scared and didn't want one unless I had to have it. the pain is the contractions. pushing for me was amazing. it doesn't make you any less of a woman if you have a c section. my aunt had 2 and she has 3 children and my friend had one with her son. they both preferred them. people are rude, just ignore them. keep your chin up!

Tamika - posted on 08/11/2009

Many drs "scare" you into the 2nd c-section...mine did not...they let me weigh the pros and cons...if you have only ever had one c-section--and teh baby is healthy, head down and you are in good health--a vaginal birth the second time is always safer. I was scared because my kids were only 16 months a part...and anyone that has had a c-section KNOWS you are not supposed to get prego in the first 2 years following a c-section...OOPS..anywho...a c-section is a MAJOR surgery..and ppl forget taht...having said that: if you have had 2 c-sections...it is NOT safe to do a vaginal birth..not with that much scar tissue..from what i have been told...i am no dr...but i have been a very imformed mother!

Mary - posted on 08/11/2009

I had an emergency csection with my 1st and then an elective csection with my 2nd and the dr actually told me csection would be safer the vaginal delivery because their is risk of uterine ruptue because of all of the scar tissue,so i think your doin what is gonna work for your body and lifes too short to care about what others think. and even when you have a baby vaginally alot of woman get pain medicene so are they less of a woman because they didnt expierence the full pain of labor? i dont think so.

Dara - posted on 08/11/2009

i just had my first baby emergency c-section, the doctor tells me my next one should be a c-section as well, so i will probably be in the same boat, i do know its dangerous for a mom with one c-section to tr to have a vaginal birth because of the scar tissue

Tamika - posted on 08/11/2009

If you have had 2 c-sections then it is safer to have another from what I have heard. My first I had a c-section and my 2nd I did natural V-BAC--let me tell you--THEY BOTH SUCK, but either way it is worth it. You needmore help after a c-section, which I am sure you already know.

Tamika - posted on 08/11/2009

If you have had 2 c-sections then it is safer to have another from what I have heard. My first I had a c-section and my 2nd I did natural V-BAC--let me tell you--THEY BOTH SUCK, but either way it is worth it. You needmore help after a c-section, which I am sure you already know.

Jennifer - posted on 08/11/2009

Do not even pay ANY attention. Just because you haven't pushed doesnt mean ANYTHING. you have to do whats best for your baby and yourself. when your life is on the line and your babys then you have to get help. do not pay attention to whoever said that!

Amy - posted on 08/11/2009

I myself had to have an emergency c-section. After 12 hours af labour my baby's heart rate dropped so dramatically they didn't give me much hope that my baby would survive. Once they did manage to get my little girl out they discovered the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck 3 times. It was not my first choice, but faced with the option of having a dead baby, or the breathing, healthy, beautfil baby girl that I have, I would have done anything to make sure my baby was delivered alive! For those people who think not pushing makes you less of a woman.....try going through the trauma of possibly losing your baby before you start judging people!! If faced with the same decision again....I would be 100% posative of making the same choice! Shame on You!

Deana - posted on 08/11/2009

Hello, I have 3 children and have had the pleasure and displeasure of having both vagial and cecerian births. I vote for vaginal if your body allows. You can plan all you want but if the baby needs to come out in a hurry what else can you do but have the c-section. I vote vaginal because I was ready to leave the hospital right after having birth. I didn't have any drugs either. I felt better than ever after having a baby vaginally or VBAC. I say nay to the c-section because you feel crappy after words. Its more painful afterwards and they only thing you want to do after having a baby is enjoy your new baby not have to lay around drugged up trying to recover from having the baby. N E way here 's my opinion I hope this helps you in your decision in the end we do not know what nature has in store and you may end up doing something you don't want to do in the end.

Tina - posted on 08/11/2009

WOW! I can't believe people have said that you! That is horrible! I have @ boys and I have had regular vaginal birth with both but that doesn't make me any more a mother than you! You have have right to be nervous to have your baby that way since you have had complications before. I had the epidural with both and didn't feel either baby come out... People have said that I shouldn't have had the epidural because I should feel the pain of the baby coming out! Whatever people will always have their opinions, but when they are cruel opinions they should keep them to themselves!!! It the end it is your decision to make and nobody elses!!!!

Christine - posted on 08/11/2009

Wow that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. Just because you didnt have your children by vaginal birth doesnt make you any less of anything. You give birth the way that you want.

Melinda - posted on 08/11/2009

I have been where you are. I tried to have a vag. birth with my first, but after 14 hrs of labor, they had to do a C-section. I felt like I had failed! Sometimes, I still do... I'm expecting my second child in 7 months (my 1st will be a little over a yr old), and am thinking about trying for a Vbac, but I'm not sure yet. To try to do it again and fail would tear me up, but I'd feel awful if I didn't at least try... After my experience, I don't view ANYONE who has had a C-section as any less of a woman or mother. We C-sec moms don't get to hold our babies right away, don't get to nurse right away, etc., plus, we have to spend at least an hour in recovery without our blessed little one. I'd say that all mom's that have had C-sections give up a lot to have a healthy baby; why should other's think less of us? Anyway, this probably didn't help, but my advice is to do whatever YOU FEEL is best for you, your family, and your baby. Whatever that decision is, it will be the right one for you; no one should criticize you for taking care of your children! Also, as a side-note, many doctors now believe that C-sections are better/safer for the baby! Good Luck and God Bless!

Sara - posted on 08/11/2009

thats horrible for someone to say that to you. Its a ridiculous statement, it wasn't your fault you had to have it the first time, i say its safer for you to have a c-section anyway if you had previous ones

Cassidy - posted on 08/11/2009

Okay, well I am pregnant with my first so I don't really know from any personal experience however, I think it is a personal choice. I am going to try and have mine naturally. I mean the first one was a emergency c-section there really isn't anything that you could have done about that. Then you chose to have a c-section the second time, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't be allowed to have kids because it doesn't defy whether or not you are a good mother. I chose to go naturally because one of my friends had hers taken by c-section and they ended up leaving something in there so a few weeks later she had to get it removed. Plus, she said that it was really hard to get up and walk around at first and etc. If I were you I would do what I was comfortable with. I would probably try vaginal and do c-section if neccessary, but I can see how you would be more comfortable with c-section.

Te Aroha - posted on 08/11/2009

Quoting Kaylyn:

i was always told that if you have had one c-section, all the rest are mandated to be c-sections. something about the muscles you need to rely on to push your baby out have been cut and not as strong/useful anymore. If you try to have a vaginal, you may be pushing and pushing for hours with no advancement and may have to have a c-section anyways. I honestly don't know, its just what i've been told.

and on another note, people can be extremely rude and critical. don't worry about what others are saying. i would definately have taken the emergency c-section.

Once a ceaser always a ceaser is a common mis-conceptioin..  I was told that but had by son naturally even though my first was a C-section..  It is true your muscles weaken with a ceaser..  10mins of pushing and my son was out..  But I think it also depends on how healthy and fit mum to be is.. 

So all in all, it stands to reason the more ceasers you have the weaker your muscles get..  There was a woman in the maternity clinic with me who had 6 ceasers & was told no more children..

Te Aroha - posted on 08/11/2009

I have experienced both ways of giving birth. I had emergency ceaser with my eldest as her heart stopped and my blood pressure dropped. Im also one of those that has to have my waters manually broken. Was not my choice. Until I had my son I got all the crude remarks about not being womanly. I never wore the remarks though, i'd just tell people 'Well, my Husband thinks I'm woman enough to pro-create with!!' My son, was natural by my choice not because of people saying I wasn't woman enough. I enjoyed natural because the pain doesn't last as long as the C-section. Plus the latter has nothing on the pain of a ceaser! ! You just do what feels rite for you, its your body and u listen to what it tells you. ;) Hope all goes well for you.

Karen - posted on 08/11/2009

do what is safe for you and the baby.

if you need a c-section then go for it.

Sheri - posted on 08/10/2009

dont listen to ppl who say things like that, your a woman whether you have a c-section or vaginal birth, ppl choose to have c-sections all the time and of course your gonna be scaried i know i would be.

Paula - posted on 08/10/2009

I had 3 c-sections The first child was breech. The second was planned and the 3rd was an emergency c-section. The only thing i will say to anyone that thinks it is easier to have a child by c-section is crazy. I would rather the pain that goes away after the kid is out. I was still in pain almost a month after having my youngest. If you have the choice schedual the c-section because if you have an emergency c-section it takes longer to recover.

Allyson - posted on 08/10/2009

Uhh most doctors do not let you have vaginal after you've had a c section. Plus these days with the drugs who feels it anymore anyways? Tell them to shut up if anyone says anything to you. What you're doing is best for your health. Once you've had one c section it is best to have c sections for the rest. I do not encourage woman that get c sections just because they want one. But, you got your first csection,because of health reasons. You go girl!

Amy - posted on 08/10/2009

i would like to just say that it is your body and your baby.if i had a choice natural all the way the healing time is so much faster but only you can say what you want to do with your body.from my point of veiw if you can deliver vaginal (it is harder)do it but you also have to consult with your drs to find out if it is safe for the both of you that is the big thing. I wish you all the luck and cograts on your lil bundle of joy.

Melissa - posted on 08/10/2009

If you have already had 2 c-sections then why mess with what works? Those people who criticize you are full of crap and need a little dose of reality. Every woman is different and there is no "right way" to have a baby as long as you both are safe and healthy.

Betsy - posted on 08/10/2009

Yes, I'm 26 and have two children. My first was an elective c-section because my doc told me my daughter was going to be large and that would be the best route. I really pondered on the decision for most of the end of my pregnacny because that was not in my plans for birth. Finally decided to have the c-section after a lot of praying and talking with my husband. My doctor said once a c-section that I would always have to have one due to the possiblity of rupturing! So with my second I was planning on the c-section and had to have it anyway due to my daughter having a birth defect! I think that God knew I was going to have to have one with my second child so he prepared me by leading me to make the decision to have the first one the same way! I was a lot less anxious and new what to expect! Days have changed and if women want to tell you that you are less of a women or that you shouldn't have children I think that is very ignorant! You do what you think is that safest and best thing for you and your precious child! Don't let anyone elses comments influence you on what you do!

Nicole - posted on 08/10/2009

I'm not sure if you have talked to your doctor about this at all but in the hospital which I work in they do not allow you to VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section) if you have had 2 previous c-sections. If your baby did not fit the first time it is more than likely that your baby will not fit through your pelvis this time either. A c-section at this point would be much safer for you and your baby at this point. You really just need to ignore some people; they can be ignorant. And in most cases women get epidurals during labor and do not feel much pain with contractions or pushing. I work in OB and I give you props because a woman that undergoes a c-section does way more than a woman that has a vaginal delivery, and I have had two vaginal deliveries. You are no less of a woman:)

Desaree - posted on 08/10/2009

Girl you should not listen to anyone who puts you down I was in labor for 22 hrs with my first and pushed for 3, but I couldnt deliver vaginally. You do whats best for you.

Kyla - posted on 08/10/2009

I am 24 and also have has 3 children. My 1st was born naturally, 2nd i had 2 have an emergenct c section as i started bleeding and clotting. When pregnant with my last i was worried that i would have 2 have a c section as i didnt want one. The recovery was to long and painful for me, esp since i had 2 young babies at home. Its all up to you and your choice only on what you decided. the main problem i had with my son after the c section is a had trouble connecting with him, But this also because he was 3mths prem. If you decided thats what you want, that doesnt make you any less a mum.

Tamarrah - posted on 08/10/2009

i had a complication free vaginal birth with my now 2 year old son, where as my friend had an emergency c section with her son as there was major complications, there ar benifits from both either way you are still a mum, no matter which way your child is born as long as they are healthy

Misty - posted on 08/10/2009

hi kim. this is outragous! I had to have an emergency c-section and had an elective c-section. The reason for having an emergency c-section for everyone is different but most of the time it is because your body just isn't capable of getting the baby out properly. You are just as much a woman as any other woman who has given birth. And next time someone has any nonsense like that to tell you saying you haven't experienced the full pain of pushing a child out you tell her "Thank you, but you haven't experienced the full pain of having your stomache cut open and closed back up to have your baby, oh and did i mention the pain for atleast 6 weeks plus the numbness and extreme pain when your scar is pinched?" Trust me you would be more sucessful at having a 3rd c-section that is scheduled. Because like my doctor told me yes i could try vaginal but what if i get the same things happen then we have to go into emergency c-section all over again.

Yvonne - posted on 08/10/2009

Thats not fair for people to say to you! I havent been in your situation at all, I'm terrified to get a C-section! Well my thoughts are if you can successfully have a vaginal birth then you should, but if you can't for whatever reason then get a c-section. all that matters is a healthy baby, however you deliver as long as it has that result, you know. You don't want to stress out about it tho, if you aren't comfortable at all with a vaginal delivery for fear of losing your baby, then screw what people say, it isn't about them, you knwo?LMAO...I'm sorry, "ive been told im not a woman coz i havent experienced the full pain of pushing the child fully out"...how many of us have experienced child birth beginning to end with out an epidural...NOT ME! lol! and that other thing aobut not wanting to push, that is ignorant, sometimes you just cant...

Danielle - posted on 08/10/2009

kim hi... i had a vaginal birth and i'm the biggest wimp i know and it was bad but i had drugs and if people are telling you you are less of a women tell them to try it then and tell you how it was they had no right you do what you think is right for you and YOUR baby its your boby and if you want to have another c-section then you do it!!

Patience - posted on 08/10/2009

Kim, Do not let anyone tell you that you are not a woman just because you have not had a baby vaginally. I am thirty and have five children and have had five c-sections. There is nothing wrong with a woman who can not have a baby naturally. I believe and know that it is no walk in the park to have a baby by c-section. You have a longer recovery time and are not able to do alot of things just because you have had the baby by c-section. You are not less of a woman, If anything you are MORE of a woman!!!!