Can I shower with my son? My Husband says NO WAY!!

Melissa - posted on 02/02/2010 ( 125 moms have responded )

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My son it 2 1/2 months, I'm not showering with him now, he's too little but when he gets older would it be alright if we shower together? It would just be more convenient. My Husband says NO WAY! Growing up he never showered with his Mom, never saw his Mother without clothes, but he did shower with his Dad all the time. He says if we had had a girl it would be fine, but I'm going to scar our son for life if he sees me naked. I grew up with two sisters so we were naked all the time, who cares? I figure, he's breastfeeding so he sees me half naked all the time, what's the big deal? So Moms, Is it wrong to shower with my son????

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Kristen - posted on 02/02/2010

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Is your husband serious?! How on earth is seeing you naked going to scar your son?! I'd be offended if my husband told me being seen naked would be scarring!!! If your son can't learn about the human body in his own home where will he learn it? My son had his 1st shower at 2 weeks-old & is now 3 1/2 years-old & has showered with either me or his father his whole life. He has even showered with his Grandma. The body is not a dirty or shameful thing so why hide it?

Cheri - posted on 02/05/2010

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First off, your husband was a child how does he know whether or not he showered with him mother as an infant? LOL! Now, if your mother-in-law told him that, than I believe it. ;D Otherwise, he doesn't know for certain if he did or did not see his mommy naked.



Second, in my humble opinion, there is nothing wrong with showering with your son. Obviously as you said, he's 2 1/2 mos. now, and is too young. I started showering with my son after 6 months. It was way easier to do that than bathe him in the kitchen sink. When both of my boys were born they weighed over 11 lbs. Needless to say, they were done bathing in the sink after 3 months.



I dreaded bending over the tub to bathe them. It hurt everything, my knees, my back, and my glasses got foggy with all the steam from the warm water. LOL!



I bathed with my boys till they were 2 or 3. Once they started asking questions about why I don't have a private like they did. I stopped. There is nothing wrong with your children learning that girls have different privates parts from boys. I studied Early Childhood Education a few years back, and not once did I read any study about children being traumatized from taking a bath with their mothers. Now, if your son grows up and is 11 years old and you're still bathing with him. Then, you have a problem.



I don't think you are that kind of mother, for the record. However, if your husband feels so strongly about this issue, maybe it would be best for the two of you to ask this question of your pediatrician. I'm sure they'll say the same thing that I did. Maybe it'll help him to change his mind. Good luck with this!

Alice - posted on 02/05/2010

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My husband and I sleep naked and never hide from our kids who are 4 1/2 and 2 1/2 we sometimes shower (seperately!) when they are there and we use the toilet without shutting the door none of which I believe will have any effect other than our kids being comfortable about their bodies. Yes sometimes we get asked embarassing questions but I'd rather have that than have children who won't come to me about something because they don't feel they can.

Ashley - posted on 02/05/2010

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I don't think there needs to be a limit as long as you're both comfortable with it. If your child starts pointing at parts, tell them the proper name for them... if they ask questions, answer them... it'll only be embarassing or awkward if you make it seem taboo. I think taking advantage of the pointing and questions to teach them is great.

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Melanie - posted on 02/05/2010

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I having been bathing with my daughter since she was born she is 10 months now recently i have starting to not but I think its fine until he would be about 18 months.. anything after that might not be good!

Gelaine - posted on 02/05/2010

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I think that its okay, until the child reaches a certain age. After 2 or so I wouldn't want my daughter bathing with her father, but boy with dad until 3/4 should be fine, and my 4 year old daughter still jumps in the shower with me at times to save water and time!! I don't know how i would feel about a son showering with me after about age 2 or so.. I think that would be the cut off for boy in shower with mommy... I know my nephew is quite intrigued by boobies, so she (his mom) cut him off at about a year and a half or so!!

Cynthia - posted on 02/05/2010

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I don't think that it's a problem at all. My son is 3 1/2 years old and has been showering with me since he was old enough to sit on his own. Now we've added my daughter to the tub with us. She is 15 months old and has taken a shower with us since she was able to sit on her own too. It is such a time saver and I think it is so much easier for us all to get clean in one bang!

Amanda - posted on 02/05/2010

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I bathed with my son for a while until he was about 15 months. And I quit then because I was 9 months pregnant and couldnt lift him any more it makes life easier and some how makes it seem like there are enough hours in the day. My husband was always working late and getting up for work well before day light so when I got up for work Id just grab my puddin head and wash him up too. I think that there is nothing wrong with it until they can start to notice the diffrence, but remember that once he gets to moving so much that may be your only mommy time.

Jennifer - posted on 02/05/2010

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I had two sisters and we were always sharing showers because it was easier but that's because we were girls and we all have the same parts. I won't let my husband shower with our daughter whether it was easier or not. I would say husband with son and wife with daughter. I was like him. I never saw my dad naked or without cloths but I have my mom. I hate to break it to you but it a way I would have to agree with your husband on this one,

Allison - posted on 02/05/2010

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That is really silly. I shower all the time with my son (he's 17 months). There's nothing sexual or weird about it all. I figure I'll probably stop when he's around 3 or when he really starts noticing the difference between boy parts and girl parts, but a child that young won't remember it nor will it scar him for life. I personally think it's healthy to be nude a little bit around your kids to harbor a healthy view of the human body and not have them develop a weird hang-up over the human body. It's very natural!

Nicola - posted on 02/05/2010

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it doesnt matter if u shower with your son - especially when they are young and they dont remember or care what you look like!! obviously when hes old enough to wash/ bath/ shower himself then he will! there is no problem with it what-so-ever!! your partner is talking about when he was younger but at an age that he remembers, your child is your flesh and blood there is nothing wrong with it. he would be too young to understand - it wont scar him for life!!

Cindy - posted on 02/05/2010

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It's ok to do it up untill they reach a certain age.....probably should stop at around 2 years. I'm sorry but I agree with your husband you should'nt have your son shower with you. Especially not when he becomes a kid like 3, 4, 5,or 6 and so on.

Amanda - posted on 02/05/2010

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I think you should shower with your son...My husband showers and bathes with our daughter and she's 4 months old. Think of it as more bonding time with him other than the bonding time you get while breast feeding...As your son gets older and starts to understand human body parts, then it's time to stop showering with him ;)

Joanna - posted on 02/05/2010

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My son is 4 months old and I showered with him when he was a month old, and I wear my undies. I'm thinking of stopping the same shower deal when he turns a year old or when maybe before he starts asking akward questions. Guys are just overall weird...

Nina - posted on 02/05/2010

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I have three children (2 girls and 1 boy). I showered with all 3 of them. There is absolutely nothing wrong with it when they are so young. I would say 2 years should be the cut off.

Elizabeth - posted on 02/05/2010

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my son is three and he showers with me and my husband he dosent care about body parts. he plays with his toys and i plug the tub so he can play with them in there. he pays no mind to them do what you r comffy with

SARAH - posted on 02/05/2010

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scar him for life, awww no i disagree totally. if you and your son are comfortable with it then i think that's great. sometimes kids have no idea how to react if they walk in or someone, or go swimming and happen to see it and get really embarrassed so i believe if they are bought up around it, they'll be comfortable and confident in uncomfortable situations and in their own bodies aswell. x

Alicia - posted on 02/05/2010

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When my boy was a baby i was so uncomfortable showering with him i would shower him with my swimmers on, until i realised if i carried on being uncomfortable, he would learn that from me. Now he's 2 1/2 Nudity isn't a big issue in our house anymore and we have a huge shower, so it's not uncommon for all three of us to be in there at once (all 4 of us in a few weeks!) In my opinion, in a loving, caring family, nudity is not a problem. Your husband needs to realise also, that when you have a baby, safety must take precedent over modesty. You cannot leave small children unnattended to go to the toilet or shower behind a locked door. By the way, what are you to do if he ever goes away for a few days?

Sarah - posted on 02/05/2010

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My son is 2 1/2 and in the house we're renting at the moment it has no bathtub.. (HORRIBLE and inconvienient, I know!) But I dont see the harm in it. Most the time he doesnt even pay attention to what I'm doing until I go to wash him or tell him we're getting out. I think as a mom you will just "know" when the right time to cut them off is.

Kari - posted on 02/05/2010

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i showered with my son till he got closer to the age of 2 then he was able to take baths on his own and i didnt have to worry......i see nothing wrong with it when they are little.....do u remember anything honestly from when u was that age? thats what i would ask my husband....at that age the child really doesnt even know whats goin on.....after that then its daddy time or bath time lol

Melanie - posted on 02/05/2010

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It is a to each is own subject. I don't see a problem with it cause I grew up with my mother being very open with everything. I am trying to teach my 3 yr old to take showers now instead of baths so since he is scared i go in with him til he is comfortable.

Caryn - posted on 02/05/2010

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I dont have a son but I do have a daughter and she takes a shower and a bath with me. My husband says the samething that I am going to drop her one day but I dont believe that. If your son enjoys taking a bath with you then it is fine. Forget about what your husband thinks because I know I did.

Kayla - posted on 02/05/2010

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Their is nothing wrong with showering with a small child. I would say 3 would be them limit though. The start to ask questions and stuff at that age. My 19month old son showers with both me and my Fiancee. I think its a little different when a girl showers with their daddy. I dont think that its wrong but I think it should be stopped early as daddy has more parts.

Danielle - posted on 02/05/2010

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I agree with amy ... 2 should be the limit ... he is alot more curious ... and might ask some embarrasing questions at shower time

Sarah - posted on 02/05/2010

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showering/bathing with your child is fine my son is 3 and still occasionally insists on getting in the bath with me, he honestly takes no notice of the fact that im naked he knows girls are different from boys, i dont believe children will be scarred from bathing with a parent, I dont have an issue with my son seeing me naked and he doesnt take a blind bit of notice im not going to insist he waits for the toilet until i get out of the bath or cant come and speak to me when im getting dressed, if you hide yourself and are embarrassed with being naked it will rub off on your child, as long as they no they cant go running up the street with all there bits on view then whats the harm

KHALA - posted on 02/05/2010

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AS LONG AS HE IS UNDER 2 YEARS OF AGE I DONT SEE ANYTHING WRONG WITH IT. SOMETIMES I SHOWER WITH MY SON, ESPECIALLY IF MY HUSBAND IS NOT AROUND AND MY SON IS STILL AWAKE. THEY NEED TO KNOW THAT THEY CANNOT PLAY WITH THE FEMALE PARTS SO THEY WOULD NOT BE DOING IT TO OTHER PEOPLE.

Ashley - posted on 02/05/2010

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There is nothing wrong with it... my son is 2.5 years old and we don't hide our bodies from him. He often sits in the bathroom with us while we bathe/shower... our tub isn't really big enough to fit 2 people comfortably, but we used to when he was small. He knows what every body part is, and I see nothing wrong with that.

Ashleigh - posted on 02/05/2010

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I don't think there is anything wrong with showering with your son. My daughter is 20 months, and she has showered with her dad since she was 6 weeks, maybe 2 months old. I have let her shower with me, but I am not a huge fan of standing around in the shower. So it is easier for me to shower alone, and bathe her separately. Her and her Daddy love their bath time together. It's time for them to bond. They play with her bath toys and color in the tub. I don't think anything is wrong with a child taking a bath or shower with their parents. My husband and I are going to continue allowing our daughter to shower with us until it no longer works for us. Right now we are thinking that will probably be around 2 1/2. I think it is completely natural and absolutely up to you and how comfortable you are.

Brandi - posted on 02/05/2010

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my almost 8 year old sees me naked sometimes still. It's the human body and I think it should be shown that you are comfortable so as your kids will be as well. He has not gotton a ridiculous complex either way, he has not wanted me to see him naked (as well as others see him) for a bit now but is not overly concerned if i do. As for showering I did it but in a way i see it as a mom thing, more comfortable n a way. I don't think i would want my daughter bathing with her dad past 2 or so.

Roxy - posted on 02/05/2010

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i shower with both my kids i started showering with them at 2 months its so much easier during the day, my son is almost two so he wont be much longer but my kids play while i do what i gotta do then i wash them i dont think its a problem seriously u gave birth he is your son

Ashley - posted on 02/05/2010

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i think its fine. my sister has two sons and showered with them. i shower with my daughter sometimes. my only advise is to get a non slip mat for the bottom! lol. they are quite slippery! good luck!

Gladys - posted on 02/05/2010

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hi Melissa, like you i grew up with sisters. we barely wore clothes around the house. i am learning that its better to conceal your body parts from your sons. its been hard for me but i have been wearing clothes around my boys and they have been respectful about it.they knock my bedroom door before they come in and they turn around if they see me changing. I didn't scar my boys abut am glad i didn't wait for it to happen before i learnt my lesson. the bottom line is don't bath with your son.

Ashley - posted on 02/05/2010

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My sister showers with both her kids... her husband is away sometimes and she needs to shower, so she herds them both in the shower. I personally would never shower with my kids but that is b/c I like having my shower to myself for ME time lol. However I don't think there is anythign wrong with it. My BF is trying to ease our son into showers by going with him (but my son is terrified of showers) so we haven't had to worry about it yet.

Elizabeth - posted on 02/05/2010

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Geez I wish my sons would have taken showers with me! would have saved on time, unfourtunetly, they freak about the water pouring on them!

Valerie - posted on 02/05/2010

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i showered with mine occationally until he was a little over 2. once they are that old they start paying attention to things.....but i havent had any problems with mine. it certainly didnt scar him any. just once they hit about 2 make then start showering with daddy. it certainly i easier.

Elya - posted on 02/05/2010

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I think it's fine. I shower with my son who is 2 1/2. Once he starts to realize that I have different body parts than him than it'll be time to send him in with his dad! He's too busy with his toys to notice anything yet.

Stacey - posted on 02/05/2010

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i would say definatly, i dont see a problem being naked in front of your child at a young age, i have showered with boy my children, my son and daughter, kids dont see it as wrong, there kids!! id say there si a limit but what that is is whatever your comfortible with, my children are 5 and 6 and i cant even go the loo without one fo them walking in so they are going to see, x

Ashley - posted on 02/05/2010

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yes of course tell your husband to stop being silly u want to stop at about 2 2half but right now there is no reason not to. That was the only way i got showers when i had my son

Jessi - posted on 02/05/2010

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i shower with my son who is 20 months old. i make his time in the shower with me short but i was naked when he was born, and i breastfed my child. i dont think i will be scarred for life. i believe that we have a better bond than he has with his father and when he gets to noticing "things" and pointing and asking ab things then i will stop bathing with him. i think when they become curious then the co-showering should cease. so at whatever age that is then that would be a great time to stop

Rebecca - posted on 02/05/2010

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i showered one time with both of my boys. like amy Elliott said i wouldn't want to scare them lol

Kim - posted on 02/05/2010

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I shower with my son. He's 8 months now. In fact I don't do it so much now because he's too all over the place but when he was a NB he HATED his tub but loved the shower. I showered with him on a regular basis until he was about 6 months old. That's when he really got wiggly and grabby. Now he takes baths. I showered with my dad when I was little. I remember doing it I think I was about 5 or so. I'm not "scarred for life." I remember I'd come in covered in mud and my mom wouldn't let me in the house so I had to take a shower in our basement bathroom but at that age I was scared of the water over my face so I wouldn't do it by myself. I would only get in with someone so there you go. In fact I might have been more scarred for life if they had made me take the shower all by myself terrified.

Lindsay - posted on 02/05/2010

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I would have to say upto s certian age is fine, but usually after three they start to figure out that girls and boys have differnt body parts and they get curious and might ask questions you are not ready to answer. i showered with both of my sons untill they were about 2 in half. Then after that they started taking showers with daddy.

Leila - posted on 02/05/2010

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i showered with my son untill a few months ago he will be 3 soon and is startign to ask questions about boys and girls so i said umm no more.. but i think its fine as long as he doesnt know whats what yet plus who wants to wait for a sitter to shower?

Jessie - posted on 02/05/2010

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i showered w/ my older son until he was 4 he is now 6 and "does it all by himself thank you" but I see no problem with it

Jenifer - posted on 02/05/2010

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My son is almost 6 and he has no probelm with nudity, I don't sream when my son comes in to talk to me and I have nothing on cause I am getting dressed, I poltely ask him to close the door and talk to me with the door closed. I like that he doesn't freak out by seeing me naked and I dont care cause nothing innapropriate is happening. In other cultures women don't wear tops, and nudity is more prevelant. I don't want my son to be embarrassed by nudity, mine or his own. I change with my door closed and so does he, but we don't freak out if the other is naked and he always keeps his clothes on in public. But it's nice to go into a store and try on a bra real quick and my son can sit in the dressing room with me cause I don't want him waiting outside by himself at a store. I would do what you are comfortable with and if questions are asked or when you feel it's time, then you stop.

Yesica - posted on 02/05/2010

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I showered with my son till he was 3 or 4 and is ok kids are not going to think "oh no my moms naked" but now he is 8 an he will not let me even see him do number 2 not that I would want to because its stinky in there but there is nothing wrong with it until they are older is not recommended by psychologist.

Katy - posted on 02/05/2010

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My mom told me that I would occasionally shower with my dad up until I was around 2 when I looked at him and said "Daddy what's that?" She said after that dad said "no more showers with me!" My sister has two little girls and both of them never had baths because their dad would just bring them into the shower with him, wash them off and hand them back to my sister. Just talk to your husband and hopefully you can come to an understanding.

Amy - posted on 02/05/2010

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I don't have a son, but we have a daughter (she about 2 1/2) and she showers with my husband and I. I don't see anything wrong with it. But once she gets old enough to understand boys are different then girls, and starts to ask question then she'll just shower with me.

April - posted on 02/05/2010

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I have showered with my son, he is 15 months old. Usually it's my husband that would shower with him if we were in a hurry or we were extra tired and just wanted to get two showers done in one. Bath time is fun time though for a baby. He can learn a lot from taking a bath and it's relaxing. Also, when showering with your baby it can kinda be dangerous because you're both soapy and slippery so be very careful. I would recommend letting him take his own bath so he can learn and play. But, i don't think there is anything wrong with showering with your son. At least until he gets a little older. Hope this helps :)

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