Co-sleeping

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Ash - posted on 02/11/2010

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I've been cosleeping for 2years, best experience ever. It actually reduces the risk of SIDS, it can still happen but it's less risky than having your baby in his crib.



Wonderful! Keep it up!

Ayrjia - posted on 01/27/2010

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Ok...I'm sorry if I hit a nerve. I honestly didn't read your comment. So for you to respond so directly to mine as if I did is concerning. I was speaking about life in general and to the woman who posted this question. To let her know that we all have experiences and discussions where many women will give their two cents and sometimes it can be more discouraging than encouraging. It's my experience. I didn't shame anyone for doing what they feel is best and voicing it.

What I said is true. Women and mothers don't stand by eachother as much as I would like to see. There is more rivalry, judgement, and caddiness between mothers that I would love to see turned into understanding, support and willingness to learn from one another. I bid you all good luck in motherhood and hope that we can all practice patience and understanding as we do with our children.

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Jessica - posted on 02/11/2010

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I dont think your crazy, but personally i made the choice not to co sleep, mainly because my baby was only about 5lbs when i brought her home from the hospital, and my bed was not safe for her (high off the ground, puffy duvet cover) When she was sick i did co sleep with her for 2 nights but i did not get any sleep, i just stayed awake watching her breathe cause i was so worried. i prefer to have her in her own crib. i am an active sleeper and i realize that co- sleeping just isnt for us.

Amber - posted on 02/11/2010

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I let my little guy sleep with us most of the time. He alternates between his crib and our bed throughout the night, so hubby and I can get our time together and still have some time left to cuddle with the baby. I personally love cosleeping... though hubby and I are very intuitive sleepers and wake up as soon as we hear him stirring. Do what's right for you! There's dangers in every situation and you can't protect your baby from everything. If you feel safer and more secure with your baby in bed then you probably are.

Tara - posted on 02/11/2010

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I just want to say that I understand the want to have your child close to you and to need to feel that comfort. I used to think that cosleeping was fine and that what everyone said was ridiculous, but my son passed away from SIDS in my bed right next to me. He wasnt rolled on and he didnt suffocate, he just passed. I'm not saying that this will happen to your child, I'm just saying that it happens and u should be very careful. Better to be safe than to lose your child forever and be more than sorry.

Tara

Marty - posted on 02/11/2010

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I would personally be terrified of rolling over and harming my baby in my sleep... But if you know yourself enough to know this won't be an issue and trust yourself then I don't see an issue.

Just be careful because I've seen this to be a really bad habit to get out of.

Crystal - posted on 02/11/2010

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absolutely not i hate when everone tells you how to raise your kid my son never took to the bassinet i am hoping he will take to the crib when i get it but for now he sleeps in the bed with me and i actually like it i feel that i can watch him better and i actually feel better when he is with me my son likes being close and held when he is sleeping so i can lay him at the opposite side of the bed and fall asleep and when i wake up he is curled up right beside me it is so precious that is something i would miss if he was sleeping in the bassinet

Becky - posted on 02/11/2010

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I don't think you're crazy at all! I co-slept with my daughter until she was 6 mos. old. She would sleep in the bed with us all night, every night! I was breastfeeding and it was the only way to get her to sleep. I am a very light sleeper and also took precautions to make sure it was safe for her to sleep next to me; i.e. never had her in bed if I was EXTREMELY tired (like after working night shift), had taken any medication to make me sleepy (like Benadryl), and we also made sure our fitted sheet was extremely tight on the mattress, plus no sheets above her waistline. She has transitioned beautifully to sleeping in her own crib in her nursery over the past few weeks. She now wakes up only once a night to take a bottle and then goes right back to sleep. I think every baby sleeps when they are ready and there is nothing unnatural about a baby wanting to sleep with Mommy; you just have to do it safely and use common sense.

Amanda - posted on 02/11/2010

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All of you that are cosleepers should ask yourselves this question. Why are you sleeping with your baby? Most answers are going to be for your reasurence not the babies safety. Just because you have had other children cosleep and not die doesnot mean all your children and other peoples children will be as lucky. As a mother your first and foremost priority is to the safety of your baby. Do you ride in a car with out your baby safely in a carseat no because there is a greater risk of deathfrom an accident. Why put your children in danger for your own personal selfishness.

Shaughnessy - posted on 02/06/2010

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Absolutely not! Our ten month old has slept with us and will continue to do so until she wants to go to her own bed.

Emily - posted on 02/06/2010

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ok so here is my thoughts on co-sleeping, I have a 3 1/2 year old that ended up co-sleeping with my husband and I because I sleep walk and when I was nursing her I would go into her room pick her up and bring her back to bed, and I wouldn't remember any of it. Very dangerous to her and so she ended up just sleeping with us, I do however regret it 100 %. Why you may ask, BECAUSE SHE IS STILL IN BED WITH ME AHHHHHHH, you want to talk about not getting a good night sleep because of your new born, think of this when they are old enough to move around and long enough to have their foot in your butt or in your face, or just plain take up the whole bed. lol Anyway we now have a second baby girl, where there is a will there is a way wink wink (for the lady that said "how can you have sex with a child in your bed" there are other rooms in the house ha ha), and we have learned our lesson, the second sleeps in her own room and when she wakes up I go in feed her and put her back in her crib where she puts herself right back to sleep. It was hard the first few days however she learned quickly to put herself back to sleep and to sleep in the first place. I have noticed that my second one sleeps so much better and doesn't wake up as much as my first one did that slept with us. Here is my reasoning for this, when your child sees your face they wake up even more than what they already were, so it takes feeding or rocking for them to get them back to sleep. If there is nothing to catch their interest, such as moms face, they just simply fall back to sleep or fuss a bit and then fall back to sleep. It is scary to put them in their own crib and more so in their own room but it is in the best interest of your child to break them of that habbit early on. Also as a safety caution, it is very dangerous to have a baby sleeping with you, especially if you are mostly asleep and nurse the child, you can cause suffocation. Anyway I would recommend that you do what you feel most comfortable with, however I strongly discourage co-sleeping due to my own experience. I pray the Lords wisdom for you!

Erin - posted on 02/06/2010

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No. It is far more convenient for night feeding. I don't think rolling over on your baby is a serious concern unless you are on medications for sleep and you baby is very tiny. You do at one point have to move your baby into his/her own bed. I thought that day would be when my son asked to be put into his own bed. I was wrong. He is 30 pounds and disrupting our sleep. So as of four days ago (he is 3 yo) he is in his own bed in his own room. My husband and I have some more privacy and are getting better sleep.

Kara - posted on 02/06/2010

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I don't think you are crazy. My oldest son slept in our bed with us and he transitioned to his own bed just fine. If I had let him sleep in his crib or bassinet he would not be here today, because I wouldn't have known when he quit breathing one night. Thankfully he was in our bed and I could tell when he quit and was able to get him to breathe again.

Mary - posted on 02/06/2010

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NO!! All 3 of mine were breastfed till they were a year old so they slept in bed with me and my husband from they day they came home from the hospital. Once they hit a year I stopped the breastfeeding and they slept in a crib. It took a couple of weeks to get them adjusted but after that I never had a problem

Amanda - posted on 02/06/2010

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I breastfeed my baby at night, so it's a lot easier for me to let him sleep with us, but on the other hand my oldest son is 2 and still doesnt want to sleep by himself. We lay with him in his bed until he's asleep and sneak out of his room. Occasionally he wakes up and gets in our bed which is ok as long as it isnt every night. 4 people in a bed is a crowd. My husband and I try to have a night a month to ourselves when we take the kids to grandmas. Everybody wins.

Carly - posted on 02/06/2010

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i have been co-sleeping since the day july 4th, the day my baby way born. there are studies to show that sleeping with your child reduces that childs chances for sids because they tend to follow your breathing pattern..not saying its a fact because it has not been proven yet..i just always felt more comfortable with her by my side. she slept in her crib at times too though ...and now that she is 7 months i am switching her over to more crib time....shes doing great with it though because she loves that she can use the sides of the crib to pull herself up to standing position





good luck

Dionna - posted on 02/06/2010

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Absolutely not. I do it too with my 6 month old daughter. I heard when they get older its harder for them to sleep in their bed on their own, but Im willing to work with that when the time comes. Its different for every child and no one can judge. No matter what I do when I put my daughter in the crib, being dead asleep, she knows and purposly wakes herself up and starts screaming. She has to cuddle next to me to fall asleep...but honestly I love it. My cousin had to do the same thing and so did my nephew. All babies are different though.

Hope this helped :)

Stephanie - posted on 02/05/2010

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Also if you look at recent studies and statistics, the SIDS cases which are supposedly caused by co-sleeping are mostly from people who have been drinking and/or taking drugs and also people falling asleep on the sofa with their babies and not in beds. My earlier reply was brief as my son woke up. The first night in hospital with him he was up all night as everytime I put him back in the crib he woke up, and the same happened the next night at home. The following night I gave in and let him sleep in my bed and he slept soundly and has stayed there ever since. I was terrified at first and kept a low light on for a few weeks so that I could instantly see him when I awake, but I soon realised that I could sense exactly where he was anyway. He doesn't cry in the night as I can his slightest movements and know he is hungry, so I just give him a breast before he starts. I can also hear his breathing and can tell whether he gets too warm or cold and can add or remove a layer with ease. I'm a single mother, so I don't have to worry about a partner rolling onto him. But it's up to you! From the way you worded your question, you sound like you're already co-sleeping, so if you're comfortable with this continue; it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks!!!

Caryn - posted on 02/05/2010

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NO!!! My daughter sleeps in the bed with me. They feel as if your their security blanket, so therefore they will sleep better in the bed with you rather than in their on crib or bed.

Lindsay - posted on 02/05/2010

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i would not co sleep with my kids ... i have 2 , a four year old boy and a 4 month old girl ... didnt let either sleep in our bed and both have WONDERFUL sleeping habits , my daughter has put herself to sleep without crying since she was 2 months old using a pacifier (which they say is good for preventing SIDS) and sleeping through the night for about a month now , my son slept through the night when he was a little older, but always in his own room and bed ... i would reccomend putting your baby in their own room ... it really helps to start healthy sleeping habits when they are young ... and you can keep your sanity at bedtime with a good bedtime routine :o)

Stephanie - posted on 02/05/2010

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nope, i've co-slept with my son every night and wouldn't have it any other way! He doesn't cry at all at night as i can soothe him before he starts.

Jessica - posted on 02/05/2010

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Not crazy at all! There's two sides to co-sleeping obviously but we mostly hear about the negative side not the positive one. Co-sleeping is healthy! However it's not recommended for people suffering from obesity, people under the influence or taking medications that cause drowsiness. Co sleeping reduces the risk of SIDs and helps babys sleep! Imagine after being in the womb for 9 months you wake up in a bed with bars all by yourself vs. waking up next to your mother and father and can hear them breathing and their hearts beating. The second I think is way more comforting which is why babies tend to sleep better! Cosleeping also increases the bond between parents! There are a million reasons to co sleep. Some doctors recommend it and some don't. Read Attachment Parenting by Dr. Sears if you want more reassuring professional advice. One more thing parents come with instincts, if it feels right, then do it!

Shannon - posted on 02/05/2010

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Ok...is co-sleeping the safest option...No. However I have a 6 month old daughter whom i nurse. She is obviously more comforted in a bassinet and pack n play in our room and in our bed than in her crib. I think people forget that the Western civilization are the only ones who seperate the baby from the mother, not only to work, but also to sleep. Unfortunately, many mothers do no have the option to stay home, and like spending the comforting time with their children. Also remember that they are babies not grown children, they can not rationalize and understand the world around them like we can. Comfort is one of their basic needs as well as being warm and being fed! If done safely and when the child can roll effectively, why stress? Also, remember those who nurse...I was told once...she will not nurse at 5 and will not be sleeping with you at 15...this too shall pass, they do grow up.

Celeste - posted on 02/05/2010

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I forgot to mention on previous post that I didn't sleep with a pillow for a while when she was super burying her face and head into me for fear of suffocation. that was the only thing that made me fearful.

Celeste - posted on 02/05/2010

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absolutely NO WAY!! I slept with my daughter until she was 18 months. It is unbelievably reassuring (for both of us) to have them so close. They never feel the anxiety and fear of being alone. When they start to roll over, you need either move the bed to a wall and you sleep on the outside or get a side guard. If you are sleeping with a partner, make sure you are both light and aware sleepers. If you are nursing, it is the most convient for night feedings, just roll over and lift your shirt! There is a lot of debate about this topic, but it is how humans have evolved for thousands of years, and that can't be bad! You just have to be creative about finding other places to get romantic! ;)

Heather - posted on 02/04/2010

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Our 3rd son slept in our bed because he was ill. At 3 years old we gout him a car bed and he hasn't been back. Now our 4 th son slept in a sleeper next to our bed, He went into a toddler bed at 12 mths , cause he hated his crib. He loves his big boy bed.

Lori - posted on 02/04/2010

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YES!!!! It is crazy! You will never get the child out of the bed. My husband wanted our son to sleep in the bed with us but i refused. His sister has children older than mine and one staye in the bed with them till the other was born and the other one as far as i know still gets in bed with them and she is almost 8

Maggie - posted on 02/04/2010

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Stop it while you can! I let my 3 year old son sleep with me when he was an infant because he was sick a lot and my husband worked out of town during the week. Now he still won't sleep in his bed and it's hard both on him and me he doesn't get enough sleep because he won't sleep without mommy and I have to admit I love to cuddle with him at night. When I had my little girl 6 months ago I promised myself not to make the same mistake twice and she is happily sleeping through the night 11 hours in her own bed!!! DON'T DO IT!

Tammy - posted on 02/04/2010

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yes I did that with my first born and now he is 6 i have trouble keeping him in his bed

Brandice - posted on 02/04/2010

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I have two children, a 5 yr old and one that is abuot to be 1. My 5 year old only slept in the bed with me if she was extremely sick. My son has yet to ever sleep in the bed with me. Both me and my husband are the kind of people who move around a lot in bed and I'm just scared I would hurt my baby. Also, I like to think of my bed as a place for adults only. How can you possibly "spend time" with your spouse with a baby in the bed too?
My husband's parents have a daughter that is about to be 5 and they let her sleep with them when she was a baby... and she still sleeps with them. She has never had her own room, let alone her own bed. Their reasoning was that it's just easier. It might have seemed easier when she was a baby and didn't want to put herself to sleep or sleep alone, but really they have to grow up and sleep alone sometime.
I understand a mother wanting to have her baby close to her so that she can wake up if they need her, but that's why they have bassinets and cribs that can fit in your room. I would say that you're not crazy, but that you should really think about what kind of damage you may be causing your baby in the long run. Then again, it could all work out. It's your child, so bottom line, it's your decision.

Jacky - posted on 02/04/2010

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Yes! I think co sleeping is very dangerous when a baby, and that just leads to the child never wanting to sleep alone. My sister co slept with both of her kids, now she has a 4 year old and 1.5 year old sleeping with them. It has gotten to the point where they dont even sleep in bed anymore everyone sleeps in a pile of blankets and pillows on the floor. What you want to do with your childern if you business, but you should think of when they get older and whats its going to do to them when you try to put them in your own bed.

Amanda - posted on 02/04/2010

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first of all why would you want to intentionally put your baby in more danger the he or she already is in. When you ride in the car do you let your children go without seat belts or carseats. That increases their chances for death. Just because you can not take the noise that children make when they are not happy does not mean that it is a good thing. Who are you doing this for yourself, you feel more comfortably not for the baby who is now at a greater chance for any number of dangerous things to happen. So dont lecture the mothers out their that are trying to save lives by educating the dangers of cosleeping

Cheryl - posted on 02/03/2010

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Every one has there own opinion. I dont think it is an ideal habit. Sure my daughter and I fell asleep together from time to time and we often sleep together when we are traveling. I found it was very important to create a boundary from the beginning. For the 1st few months she slept in a pack and play next to our bed for easy night time nursing. When she was about 3 months old I began putting her in a crib in her own room. After teaching her how to sleep on her own (See secrets of the baby whisperer) It was good for me to have sound sleep between feedings without a wiggle worm sticking her toes in my side and laying on my face!!! It is also extremely important if you are married to have a time and place that is just for you and your spouse. The absolute best thing you can ever do for your child is to have a good strong relationship with your spouse. For the most part you should do what you feel is right and safe, and make sure that you balance your decisions by asking yourself if it is a choice you are making for yourself or for your child. Do you want them to sleep with you because you enjoy the closeness , or because you honestly think it is the right choice for your child both now and in the long run. I think this question should be applied to every big decision on make for ones children. Whatever you choose be confident that you are a good mom!

Measie - posted on 02/03/2010

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...Just recently, a friend of my husbands co-workers wife rolled over on her 5 month old and it smothered him to death...I wouldn't recommend it unless your a super light sleeper... :(

Amanda - posted on 02/03/2010

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Yes, there are a number of things that could happen. The least of them being falling out of the bed. Their risk of dying increases dramatically. Suffication is the most likely thing that will happen. even after they turn one their is risk of you rolling on top of them and our blankets are too heavy for their little bodies and they can still sufficate.

Elizabeth - posted on 02/03/2010

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out daughter was sick when she was little and now 14 months old she is still sleeping with me. Her dad sleeps in our extra bedroom...how sad! I have tryed and tryed and will continue to try and get her to sleep in her own bed but sometimes its not worth the fight! I would not suggest to anyone to let baby sleep with them not because it is not safe or anything but because my relationship and my back have both suffered because of it! Good Luck and Happy Sleeping!

Kathleen - posted on 02/02/2010

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Definitly not its special! I think of it like this... its only for 2- 3 years tops that our bubs are going to want us to be this close - everyday they get more and more independant its a special time and because u keep ur baby close it will feel safe and learn to fall aslepp by itself in its own time. untill then treasure every second! we still co-sleep with my 15 mnth oldeven though he can put himself to sleep most of the time and has started moving himself into his own big bed. the grow up way too fast

[deleted account]

You might be interested in this website. http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/ According to Notre Dame Univ's sleep lab that researches mother-infant sleep habits, they feel that for breast-fed infants, they are actually safer to sleep with the mother. Of course you should have a firm, flat mattress and no heavy comforters that could smother a child. For my family, we don't have our bed on a frame. It's on the floor just in case they should roll out, not far to fall.

Jasmine - posted on 02/02/2010

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No, Ithink if it doesn't bother you are the baby then their's nothing wrong with it.

Kelly - posted on 02/02/2010

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No, I think you should do what feels right for you. If it makes your life easier, and you're all sleeping well, thats the most important thing. I had my daughter in my bed until she just turned two. The only thing to be aware of is that once they are in the habit of sleeping with you, it is quite difficult (but not impossible) to get them in their own bed. I would do the same thing again, I think its great bonding with your baby and saves you getting out of bed several times a night!

Heather - posted on 02/01/2010

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I think that co-sleeping is WONDERFUL! My daughter (who will be 2 in April) slept with me until she was 1. Her father was deployed int he military so i had no problems with her sleeping with me...made nursing her much easier as well! when she was about 1 she also rolled out of bed during a nap and thats when i decided it was time to for her to sleep in a crib. it took her 2 nights to learn to sleep in her crib. since then she has sometimes come to sleep in my bed but not much. she sleeps just fine in her crib.

Kimberly - posted on 02/01/2010

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But I do know it is dangerous. Within the past year, I can't tell you how many stories I've heard on my local news about co-sleeping deaths...

Kimberly - posted on 02/01/2010

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I would say it's fine, as long as you're ok with it maybe becoming a habit, and then having to eventually break it.

China - posted on 02/01/2010

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jus do what ever it is you do. but if you would like answers please let me know cause your message didn't sound like a question it sounded like your downing other mothers for doing what ever it is being whatever kind of mother they are no one is perfect

China - posted on 02/01/2010

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NO all my kids slept wit me till at least 10 months then they sleep longer but its also bad cause they get use to it and not wanna sleep alone. but your fine

Tasha - posted on 02/01/2010

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I ♥ cosleeping, my DD is 9 months old and we both sleep so much better all in the same bed!

Laura - posted on 02/01/2010

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We co-slept with our daughter for two reasons: 1) she was throwing up in her sleep and we wanted to catch her when she did instead of having her choke and 2) my husband has sleep apnea and I was a little scared she would have issues with her night-breathing.

She transitioned herself to a crib when she was around 6 months old. By that time she had stopped vomiting at night.

We used a co-sleep bed that had mesh sides. As long as you co-sleep safely and you feel its best for you go for it. I know people say kids get smothered by co-sleeping. Babies also get smothered when you use the wrong kind of bumper pads in the crib, or if you use a pillow too soon.

Felicity - posted on 02/01/2010

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nothing wrong with it at all as long as you are happy doing it. i co slept with my youngest regularly until she was 14 months, i did always put her down to sleep in hwer own bed but when she woke in the night she would come in my bed for a feed and then just stay there. at 14 month i decided to stop feeding her in the night and went in and sat by her cot if she woke until she was back to sleep. after a week or so of that she pretty much slept thruogh. she is now 22 months and sleeps 7 - 7. so co sleeping as a baby doesnt always mean that they will be in your bed for years and years!

if it makes you happy do it.

Ashley - posted on 02/01/2010

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All I have to say about this is that my mother let my sister sleep with her at night-and she was 9 yrs old before she would sleep in her own bed! Now my sister lets her little girl sleep with her. She is 4 yrs old. The last time I was at her house, her daughter told her when it was time to go to bed. Mommies are supposed to decide when little ones go to bed-not the other way around. Good luck with this situation.

Arrica - posted on 01/31/2010

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If you're wanting an honest opinion I won't say it's crazy to WANT to sleep with your child. It's a natural thing that I'm sure a lot of parents would like to do so. But, it is crazy to do it. Not only is it dangerous for them, they could roll off the bed or get suffocated by you rolling on them, but it's also not healthy. I'm sure some babies out there transition to their own bed nicely, but there are A LOT of others that don't. But do you really want to chance it? Neither of my kids slept with us in bed. Now, my daughter did sleep in a bassinet until she was about 6 months and my son until he was about 3 months in our room. If that's something you're wanting, them just to be close to you, than that is a good resolution. But eventually, you will have to put them in their own crib in their own room.

I've seen so many of my friends do this and wait until the child was a little older and trust me, it is sooooooo much harder to teach them to sleep in their own bed when they can sit up, stand up or worse, talk! They will pull at your heartstrings even more to get you to get them out. It's a lot easier when they're infants.

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