Crazy bloody mother in law!! Im going to kill her!! ( OR sell her)

Josslyn - posted on 03/28/2010 ( 17 moms have responded )

339

38

54

I'm really started to hate my mother in law. No matter what I say to her and how I want to raise my child she has the cheek to say but she's already raised 3 and she knows what to do!! The baby isn't even there yet, and must admit her three boys ( My husband included) aren't completely 10/4!!



She has now invited herself into my labour room the day I give birth, even though I told her my husband is the only one that will be there!! ( and have repeatedly said as well!!)



I swear if she doest back off I'm going to commit murder!! OR package and post her to hong kong!!



Is she naturally ignorant or just dumb??

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Jessie - posted on 03/29/2010

722

60

54

just dumb. and no one is allowed into the delivery room unless you want them there. your nurse should be told to keep her out unless they have your direct permission (not your husbands) I had them kicking my own mother out. I wanted it to be completely quiet while I was having a contraction and she couldnt keep her mouth shut. besides that she is hard of hearing and would not listen to me when I said be quiet or dont touch me. she really was trying to be helpful so my boyfriend could take a break or two (it was a really long labor) but it was the opposite. they should not let her in if you dont want her! and trust me it wont get any better unless you make a stand. mine is still annoying me (well, she had 3 kids so she knows what she's talking about.. yeah) I had to tell her we wont be coming to her house anymore if she didnt back off about me breastfeeding my 8 month old son and what kind of food I allow him to have (no junk food, pop, etc). you have to make a stand, really! good luck

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

17 Comments

View replies by

DeAnna - posted on 03/30/2010

28

50

4

OMG...LMAO...SOUNDS LIKE THE SAME EXACT THING THAT HAPPEN TO ME!!!! same situation ...he raised 3 sons...and invited her self in the labor n delivery room...when i said too just me and my husband...if i was u i wouldnt let her...cuz she came in when i was pain and didnt give a shit...and she started tell me i was hallucinating....yaya...just cuz the epi worked for her didnt mean it would work for me! ugh...dont feel bad..i dont care too much mine either

Deborah - posted on 03/30/2010

2

20

0

I faced almost a similar problem but not with mother-in-law.. Instead its grandmother-in-law.. She is a pain in the ass.. a total nusience.. but i didn't commit any murder.. i walk out from the family.. i left my husband since he is a coward who bow down to whatever his granny says.. I'm a happy single mom now.. man are useless when it comes to their moms..

Jennifer - posted on 03/30/2010

39

31

2

Just tell her that if she wants to raise more kids, there are plenty of kids out there that need to be fostered or adopted. She can raise those kids her way and you'll raise yours your way. I'm lucky cause my man's family lives in the States and we're in Canada. In fact I've never met any of them.

Grace - posted on 03/29/2010

79

20

15

I'm so glad that when I delivered my baby, I was 3,000 miles away from my mother in law. I can't stand her either.

Good luck. I don't have any good advice for you.

Julz - posted on 03/29/2010

12

22

1

Seriously, there is no way she can get into that labour room without your say so - make sure the midwifes / hospital staff are aware of the situation also and to call security if she even trys.



Or you could do what I know a few people have done - don't tell her your in labour until after the birth and after you've bonded with your baby!



Whenever she says she has raised three boys, say "thats fantastic but so much has changed since then!"



and your question about if she is ignorant or just dumb - she sounds like an overbearing intrusive bitch - your the boss of your household (with your partner) and your child is yours - she can only do what you let her - let her know who is boss now and sit down with your partner now and decide what is and what is not acceptable - then maybe he should have a word to her. If she refuses to listen - well theres the door.



Your pregnant and don't need the stress, and what do they say? Happy Mother, happy baby - don't take shit from anyone xoxox good luck!

Xandria - posted on 03/29/2010

148

26

9

Sorry to say that there isn't anything you can do she is going to give her opinion as long as she has breathe in her body. However you can keep her out of the delivery room. You have two options if you don't live with her don't call her until after you have delivered. Your husband has no say as he doesn't have to push the kid out and you want to be as relaxed as possible. If you do live with her pull the doctor aside and tell him that you don't want her in there and he can tell her that there is not enough space in the delivery room and she has to wait outside.

Stephanie - posted on 03/29/2010

11

70

0

Haha, she is your mother-in-law. Luckily, i was blessed to have an amazing mother-in-law, but, she also still steps over her boundaries, and at first, i let her get too me, but.. i finally had to just say, This is my son, I will raise him how I want to raise him.. and you need to respect that, so maybe you just need to tell her how you honestly feel and just tell her straight up

Becky Jane - posted on 03/29/2010

44

54

1

It sounds to me as though she is just down right ignorant to what you want, tell your husband she must back off otherwise you will be forced to take matter in to your own hands and tell the hospital she must not be allowed into the labour suit with you 2! Your the mother not her and if she doesnt like it tough!! Dont get stressed with it all as its not good for you or the baby, but i think your husband could step in and tell her to back off, It will be you 2 that will be raising the baby not her and if she cant accept it then tell her to stay away!

Shelly - posted on 03/29/2010

16

10

3

I agreee with Brandice!! Ahh and when they are religious,they are even more strict lol! But yes you need to set boundries now, and not badmouth your mother in law to your hubby but make him realize how you feel cause his mother won't listen to anyone until he shuts her out, this woman needs to let you be a mother.It really is too bad, your in a small town lol, but be strong woman and hang in there, i hope she doesn't get in the way between you and your hubby. ♥

Brandice - posted on 03/29/2010

91

7

8

If you don't want her in the delivery room all you have to do is talk to the nurses at the hospital. It's up to YOU who is in there. They can just be discreet and say that only one person is allowed in the room during labor so it sounds like they're just enforcing the rules. I had to do that with my ex-husband's mother. She was mad because I wanted my sister (who is a nurse) in the room and not her. She even showed up during my labor and came in the room. I had warned the nurses and they simply said she had to go. My current Mother-in-law tried to make sure she was in the room when they brought my son to me (I had a c-section with him) after I had explained to everyone that I would like for just me, my husband, and my daughter in the room for bonding time before everyone else gets brought in. I hadn't even gotten the chance to hold my son yet at this point. Because I asked her to leave the room, she took it upon herself to leave the whole hospital and didn't see my son until the next night. If you don't set boundaries now with your MIL, she'll run all over you. You can't bad-mouth her to your husband either, because that's his mama and he doesn't see any wrong in her. Just talk to the nurses and I hope it all goes well for you!

Josslyn - posted on 03/29/2010

339

38

54

She's not a monster, she's a pastor lol, the whole family are pastors, got no idea where hubby fell into the picture, cos he's a brute crude biker!!

I swear I'm gonna go outa my mind!!

and the house we live in is dad in laws and we rent it for next to nothing, not to mention the town we stay in only has like 1500 people in it lol cant get very ar, even though I've tried, and all hubby can say is, she does it cos she loves us!!!! blaaaahhhhhh!!'

Maybe I should let my mom at her again, the two woman can't stand each other!!

Shelly - posted on 03/29/2010

16

10

3

Woman you need to let her know your grounds!! And the worst thing to do, is to move near your mother in law! Your gonna get an everybody loves raymond experience, where the mother in law is always there, but you need to let her hear you. That your the mother and your the one making the decision, also your hubby needs to know this too! . Luckily for me, i have a really nice mother-in-law as well a hubby who listens to me, but beleive me i've seen mother in laws being monsters to their daughters in law. Good luck! ♥

Rebecca - posted on 03/29/2010

27

29

1

I had a similar problem, and because she was my husbands mother I let her get away with it. Until one day I cracked it with her and all hell did break loose, she put on the tears and tried to tug at the heart strings with my husband, told him that I hated her and a whole range of things. You just have to be strong and stick to your guns because this is your child and you will raise it how ever you see fit. Good Luck. Be strong.

Natalie - posted on 03/29/2010

42

19

2

Talk to your husband make him give you your place.I Had kinda the same problems.We come from very different cultures(even though we are both spanish).And they wanted to do what they did to baby when their born.Hello this women tried to walk outside to the cold with my 4 day old baby.I put a stop to it I told my husband I didnt kare if she raised 20 kids .This baby is mine and yes im not an expert but no one was born ready to be a mom.He understood and since then she backed off .I hope everything gets better with you.

Josslyn - posted on 03/29/2010

339

38

54

Yeah and to make it worse is she lives around the corner, Think I'll have a word with my OB, let him sort her out. how's that for an idea, get him to tell her she is placing too much pressure on me and so on, might work, but can promise you I will not have her in my birthing room!! I'll have her arrested, my mum wont even be in it and hubby can be lucky I agreed to let him in!

Jeanette - posted on 03/29/2010

21

31

5

I'm sorry you're going through this, I have the same problem, I've even been told what I should and should not eat, I'm (if I listen to her) basically on a diet of white chicken meat and veg nothing else!! My mom used to help out by stopping most of the worst but she passed away in December 2009. I know this might be rude but I sort of hide away from her, she visits everyday but lucky I'm still at work then get home after she's gone and avoid her on weekends, cant visit feeling sick if she comes to the house I leave - have to visit my sister you know - I'll have to think of a really polite way of telling her off soon but I just wanted to let you know you're not alone! Good luck!

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms