do you let your child cry themselves to sleep?

Lindsey - posted on 07/29/2010 ( 16 moms have responded )

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My 10 month old sometimes refuses to sleep even though he is soo tired.even if i catch him at the right time sometimes he just dont want to sit still long enough ya know? so does anyone let there children cry themselves to sleep?

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Maria - posted on 08/08/2010

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my son is 2 years old and i still let him cry himself to sleep it is hard to hear him but if i don't do it now i know it will get harder the older he gets

Chrystal - posted on 08/08/2010

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I completely agree with letting your child cry themselves to sleep only if you have exhausted all of your options. If you have tried anything and everything and there is nothing else you can possibly do, then let them cry themselves to sleep. That way you can keep your sanity as well.

Melodie - posted on 08/08/2010

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My 5 month old knows from her bedtime routine that it is time for sleep and she gets so upset about it she will cry and cry- even when holding her, not to mention when we lay her down. My Pediatrician actually recommended we lay her down tired but awake and let herself cry to sleep- THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE. We tried it for 3 nights and then that was it! Bedtimes are a nightmare for us now because we dont know what to do but I dont want her falling asleep crying. So I continue to nurse her to sleep and run in to replace binky throughout the night (about 1-2x), until her 5am feeding. I dont know what to do- I have noticed that the more secure she feels in my attending to her cries the longer she sleeps at night- When we did the cry to sleep tactic she woke up about every hour those nights.

I feel like its normal to have these nighttime difficulties and these are human beings not TRAINED robots so it cant be perfect EVERY-NIGHT some nights are wonderful some not so great.

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Kimberly - posted on 08/08/2010

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Actually, Yes, A lot of people do that. It's called crying it out. My daughter is also 10 months old and i have been rocking her to sleep since she was born and it's getting a little ridiculous and painful on my back. So lately I have been putting her down in her crib for naps and letting her cry but checking on her and letting her know that it's okay. But there is nothing wrong with letting your baby cry. it teaches them to self soothe and how to sleep on their own. :) good luck!

Rooja - posted on 08/08/2010

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no never ... it works for many people .. but its not for me and my husband .... i once tried .. and after 5 mins, i was crying more than her .. lolz ....
my sis has had wonderful results with it though

Lyndsay - posted on 08/08/2010

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Yup, sometimes. My son is 3. He likes to play with his toys at bed time so I will leave his door open to give him light from the hallway, or I will leave his TV on for half an hour while he settles. Some days he will watch his movie and fall asleep, and some days he will refuse to sleep and be in and out of his room constantly until I shut the door. Once its "door shut time" he knows there are no more opportunities to test limits that night, so he gets pissed off. He will scream and cry for about 5 minutes, then eventually give up and go to sleep.

Nicole - posted on 08/08/2010

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I don't. I mean that's to say that I don't let my baby stay in a room by himself and cry. If he is having a tough time going to sleep, I usually do some kind of comforting technique that usually involves holding him. If he continues to cry during that, it's usually a less stressed cry and it kinda sounds like he's singing himself to sleep. LOL I don't leave him alone to cry because studies have shown that this increases stress hormones in the child and is not good for them. Plus, I can't do it. I feel like he's crying for a reason.

The good news: I'm not saying what I am doing is right, but truthfully, I don't have to comfort him to sleep very often (usually it's only when he's teething), because he almost ALWAYS goes to sleep without crying or fussing. How I achieve this: I don't let him cry by himself and I have a very good bedtime routine. And I also have a good naptime routine. When he is overly tired (because his daily routine was messed up), he can struggle a little harder to go to sleep.

I am against leaving a baby alone to cry to sleep. Mostly because of the studies I have read. Also because the one child (out of my four) where we did the Cry-It-Out Method now has an Autism Related Disorder. I am not saying that Cry-It-Out caused this, I am just saying that I now feel guilty for using that method, because knowing more about his disorder, we now know that he can get easily uncomfortable and needs help. This is probably what was wrong when we left him to cry all by himself. He wasn't comfortable. How sad I now feel for him. And I will NEVER let one of my children cry themselves to sleep again.

Jessica - posted on 08/08/2010

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My son cries every night because he knows it's bedtime and he thinks he is going to miss something. I do the regular nightly routine and put him in his room. I also have toys in his room that he can play with and usually within 10-15 minutes he stops crying and starts playing with toys and eventually goes to sleep.

Amanda - posted on 08/06/2010

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I will if I can tell he's crying BECAUSE he's tired. If he seems genuinely upset, I'll go to his room and hold him for a minute, or talk to him. But, if he's fussy because he's tired I can usually leave him and he'll pass out quickly.

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Yes I do. If I didn't she'd never go to bed. She only cries for maybe a minute. But she's used to it now, and knows that it's bedtime. There have been days that I've been so exhausted I've let her cry for 20 minutes; that day we were both very tired.

Amanda - posted on 07/29/2010

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What I do (I am a mother of 4) is let them cry and after 10 mins if they are still crying I pick them up and dance and softly sing to them, when they are calmed down in a soft wisper I tell them they I am gonna lay them down and they are gonna close their eyes and go to sleep so they can play with the fairies and the angels. After 10 more mins if they are still crying then I pick them back up and make sure nothing is wrong, sometimes gas and new teeth can make for a very long night.

Lindsey - posted on 07/29/2010

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dillon is quiet at first then he realizes nobody is coming so he gets louder.i let him cry it out often because even if i do try and hold me or rock him he dont want that either.so its like well dang what else can i do ya know?

Jennifer - posted on 07/29/2010

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I don't do it - makes it harder when they are older but I will deal as still not letting my youngest cry much either! Personal choice - but think most people are for the crying. And I prob don't as my kids too cry SO loud - I babysat a girl who didn't even know how to cry - her cry was my kids' whine- so I prob could do it then - lol

Jeffe' - posted on 07/29/2010

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I would say the best thing to do is let him cry it out in his crib without trying to pick him up maybe just sit there with him and let him calm down knowing the fact that you are there and that everything is ok and once he starts to drift off try and sneek out. Once he notices your gone he'll probably cry again and then let him cry until he falls asleep but he had the reasurrance that you are still around when you went in the first time.

Lindsey - posted on 07/29/2010

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i always feel bad when i do this because my son can get pretty loud but when he gets this bad he wont let me hold him or put him to sleep anyways

Jeffe' - posted on 07/29/2010

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I have this problem about once a month with my daughter she is 16 months. She will be so exhausted and yet won't even close her eyes unless I am sitting next to the crib where she can see me. I will sit there until she calms down and kind of sneek out. I do this after I hear her cry for the 1st time. If she still cries after I leave and I know nothing is really wrong and all she wants is me by the crib, I will let her cry herself to sleep. It is really hard for me to do. I sit by her door and just listen to her until she finally falls asleep. I have kind of noticed that she does it to test me too. Just to see if I'll come in. I do always go in the first time to check on her just to make sure that she is ok but after that I will just listen to the type of cry she is doing. Mostly its the over tired cry and I will let her just cry until she gives up and goes to sleep.

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