Do you think it's ok to put your child on a leash?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Shannon - posted on 04/15/2010

363

24

40

I love when they are referred to as leashes and it is compared to walking a dog! Lets examine this. People love their pets and leash them to prevent them from being injured, running away, ect. yet it is degrading, disrespectful, and wrong to HARNESS a child to prevent injury, kidnapping, wondering off, ect.???? I personally have a harness for my very curious and active son. It is a little teddy bear backpack with the tail acting as the tether. He thinks its awesome and so do I. I still make my son hold my hand, I still point out the dangers of wondering away from mommy, I still watch him like a hawk, but I have the peace of mind that he isn't going to pull his hand out of mine and dart in front of a car, or get separated from me in a large crowd, or snatched by a pedophile, kidnapper, ect. NOBODY is perfect, young children (no matter how well behaved) have NO impulse control, and it only takes one second of distraction for something horrible and life altering to happen. My only concern is for my child's safety and if I feel putting a harness on him ensures his safety then that is MY decision. If this makes me a bad mother or a lazy mother in someones eyes oh well! In my eyes I am just a concerned mother that knows the real world isn't a Disney movie and takes all precautions to stay on top of her game! Everyone has their own opinion and this is mine. A mother's decision to harness her child does not make her a better or worse mother than the mother who chooses not to.

Teri-Lyn - posted on 04/15/2010

121

74

13

i respect other mothers opinions but the whole idea is to make sure your kids are safe, i recently just had my second child and if i didnt have the leash for my son life would have been a lot harder, he is very stubborn n i had some major hip pains, id much rather have my child safe then worry about judgements of others, n my son loves his, i think theyre a great idea n give kids a little freedom with the parent still knowing theyre safe

Nicole - posted on 04/16/2010

1,117

27

47

While I respect other people's opinions, I DO feel some of you that are opposed to harnesses are stereotyping and over-generalizing a little. I am sure there are some parents who use reins or a harness to be lazy, but that doesn't mean all parents use them for that. I am the mother of 4 children and I had my first 3 very close together. When my third child was born, my eldest was only 4. So that meant that I had 3 children 4 years old and younger. I only have 2 hands (and as much as I have prayed to become an octopus, that would make being a mother so much more easier, God has still left me with only 2), so with a baby in the carrier and holding one child's hand, that still left me with a young child not being held by a parent while crossing the street or walking in a busy parking lot into the local grocery store. My solution: carry my baby in a carrier (this was before I discovered slings, sadly), put my toddler on the harness, put the harness around my wrist and hold my oldest child's hand. It worked for us and made it possible for me to tend to my children and be safe with them.



Not to mention, that my toddler was very impulsive and did not follow directions very well... He was diagnosed with an Autism-related disorder shortly following the birth of my third child. He is very high-functioning so to most of the public his disorder is not obvious, so I'm sure people judged us even more when we kept him on the harness up to an older age than I originally wanted, but we had to for his safety.



To date, he has been the only of my children to wear the harness, but not because I am opposed to it. And if the situation ever calls for it when my 6 month old is older, I would use it again.



I do want to know why a harness is being a lazy parent or not allowing a child have freedom but a stroller is not? At least they are walking on their own within a safe distance on a harness instead of strapped in a stroller. As long as a parent is doing their best to keep their children safe, I don't see the big deal.

Jamie - posted on 04/16/2010

134

2

19

I think the idea of the leash is that it allows the child to explore his or her own freedom while keeping them within a safe distance.

We bought a leash for my son, but he refused to wear it, so we're constantly chasing him down in stores and shopping malls. This isn't because we're "lazy" or have failed to teach him to stay with us; it's because he's a willful, independent toddler. When he's feeling particularly obstinate he will unbuckle himself from a shopping cart and attempt to jump out. I have caught him mid-air out of the stroller, i've run over his fingers because he demands to drag his hands on the ground, i've picked him up off the ground at the zoo when he did a swan dive out of the wagon.... All because he wanted to walk around and be independent! I feel that a leash may be the better option if your child tolerates it and is happy with it.

When my sister's boy was two or three we took a family trip to Italy, we had 6 adults, 2 toddlers, one child and two infants.... and all our luggage, three car seats and two strollers. Needless to say our hands were full, so when my nephew took off into the crowds at Rome Fiumicino airport, and again at JFK in New York it was more than nerve wrecking. Had we a leash, maybe that wouldn't have been the case.

My point is, maybe a leash is a better option for some children sometimes.

Ashlea - posted on 04/16/2010

189

13

11

I personally think that every parent is entitled to their own parenting techniques! I also think that what is TACKY..is that people on here lash out at others because they state what they feel..or state what they do as a parent. Specifically more so in the fact that this is what this site is ABOUT!!! Further more...I can tell you that having a harness for your child DOES NOT mean that the parent is lazy by any means! It just means that they are using extra steps to protect their child(ren)! And, strollers...only work for a short time...are you going to have your child at the age of 5-6 in a stroller..I think not! So, yes...harnessing your child is a very well idea to keep them safe!!!!

This conversation has been closed to further comments

90 Comments

View replies by

[deleted account]

I'm going to lock this conversation because it seems to be an argument. Please remember our guidelines and review the rules for posting and flagging. You will not be banned from this or any other community for disagreeing. Everyone simply needs to remember to share their differing opinions respectfully.
Thanks,
Sara
Admin

Sierra - posted on 04/16/2010

19

18

1

and stephanie i totally agree! i'm speaking more of the parents who are shopping while their child is at the end of the leash knocking things off shelves. or parents who are eating in outdoor restaurants as their child's leash extends through the restaurant and the parents ignore it. and i don't agree with it as a FIRST resource. as i did say, if it were used for the way it was meant, it'd be more universally accepted, and these discussions wouldn't be as much had. but most parents buy them, put their kids from the stroller to the leash, and let them go. and i couldn't agree with you more!! we as parents need to TRY first! and i agree with children with special needs? that's fine! i totally understand. but there have been many children over the years who were just taught to walk from the stroller and did just fine. it's the teaching aspect that angers me and pushes me to dislike them, more than i could ever like them. i mean i could argue this same thing for "stay at home mums" who take their kids to daycare anyway. how are you a stay at home mum if your kid is babysat everyday??? it's abuse that bothers me. but thanks for the compliment and understanding! and i couldn't agree more with your post!

Stephanie - posted on 04/16/2010

728

3

64

Sierra even though our responses were somewhat on opposite sides, I respect your response as well. I think you laid it out well (even if I don't agree with all that you said). I have personally seen MANY parents that ARE becoming lazy. It's not even about kids on leashes but parenting in general. I've definitely heard oh my son/daughter will learn this and that at daycare so why do I need to teach them or they potty train kids all the time so they can do it better than I can. If you honestly try, to teach your child something yourself and it doesn't work then you look for an outside solution, I really don't have a problem with that. THAT'S not lazy, it's just using the resources you have to help your child. I have a problem with parents that from the start pass their role off to someone else.

Jennifer - posted on 04/16/2010

7

4

0

I LOVE them!!!!!!!!! I don't think of them as a leash but as 100 hands on them at all times. Not only is it better for your back but it ease the mind. They can't run off, someone can't grab them and take off running. I have had many people look at me funny but I don't care it makes me feel that my child is safer with one of them on. Plus they have made them so cute now. They can feel special because they get to carry around there own treat.

Sierra - posted on 04/16/2010

19

18

1

thank you jamie-leigh! i wasn't using "lazy" to offend anyone. i'm using it in the context of the definition of the word. if you take offense to the use of a word and it's meaning CORRECTLY, then obviously you need to reconsider why you're really angry. if you don't agree with me, or anyone, then state why and carry a discussion. sorry if i mistook these forums, but i thought they were discussion forums.

[deleted account]

Don't see why its wrong...so i say YES..if you need to use it use it if not so be it..do you really care what anyone else would think i definitely wouldnt care.This is a topic i have seen over and over and at the end of it ladies,mothers will do what the have to.Some moms still wont agree seeing a child on it but the just need to learn to accept thats the way it is and the cant change the mind of another so if you really cant bare see it look the other direction.:-)its not about wanting to control or treat your child like an animal come on now how old are we? we must have some sense .

Its concerning to me that mothers see it like that so shame on them for thinking like that.When i see children on them i never care to think anything like that i just accept its for there safety its done for a reason and move on.

Jada - posted on 04/16/2010

44

30

0

totally agree jaime leigh, the question was what our opinions were on it, not to give positive feedback to the use of leashes or say nothing, it might be heated, but thats the point of a controversial discussion, is anyone here going to change their opinion on leashing your child, if not, dont get so upset about what ppl are saying

Jaime - posted on 04/16/2010

4,427

24

196

Ashlea, while I can understand your frustration, threatening to ban and report people just because you don't like their use of the word 'lazy' is a bit silly. It's a public forum and not everyone will agree all you can do is stand your ground and support what you believe in and let others figure it out for themselves.

Sheryl - posted on 04/16/2010

714

18

65

oh another reason why some parent use it is cause there child my be austic. and my youngest my be austic. does it mean i can't control my kids no. i have some of best kids. i always get told wow they are so well behalfed kids. you can't judge a book by its cover. there may be more to the story. you don't always know what parents do what they do. do i think some may use it for wrong reason yes.but we don't know that unless we now the person. i have more then one child. thank god nothing has happend to them. cause i rather use it then having a big chance of turning my back for sec. to do something. lets all face it we are all humen we can't keep an eye on someone 24/7. esc. if just one parent.

Brittiny - posted on 04/16/2010

54

1

5

I also would really like to know out of all the moms who are so strongly opposed to harnesses, how many have more than one child? I can remember after having my first, seeing kids on "leashes" and being outraged and thinking that it was so inhumane. Fast forward 6 years and my oldest has a toddling sibling and a baby sibling as well. I now have 3 kids and 2 hands and while I do use my stroller most places, I have found over time that not everywhere is stroller friendly (can YOU push a shopping cart and a stroller at the same time?) Being the parent who usually has the kids glued to my sides while Daddy is at work, the backpack harness has really been a lifesaver... and a back saver at times. If you are one of those parents who is saying, "parents should teach their children how to behave" or that "leashes are for lazy parents" then great for you, because I guess that means that your gifted children (including toddlers) must listen to every word that comes out of your mouth... wish I knew your tricks... lol!. I guess all I am trying to say is, I think they can be useful at appropriate times for wandering toddlers and I really don't care about the looks I get from some of you folks when I'm out in crowded places, cause my kids are safe and able to have some room to roam and explore.

Sheryl - posted on 04/16/2010

714

18

65

i do when i am in a place with lots of people. but if it just everyday stuff no. i put i a harnes one. yes my child is not a animal but if i am in a place with lots and i mean lots then yes. cause that way i don't lose my child. cause alot of time i got the two of them and it not easy when we are in a place with a lot of people. but that just my view. i would go has i can but not to the point of a chip. cause i was almost kidnap, has a child. so if that ment i can keep them safe by using it then so be it.

Rosa - posted on 04/16/2010

74

36

2

I say "YES"! My son is only 7 mos. old but when he is running around, jumping and climbing all over everything and the phrase "mommy says no" no longer works I will strap him in one. I don't think it's like I'm treating him like an animal. I love my son and would much rather have people rolling their eyes in disapproval than have that feeling when your stomach drops to your feet because you have lost sight of your child.

Ashlea - posted on 04/16/2010

189

13

11

OMG!!!! How childish we are to keep calling people lazy, and that they can't control their kids because they use a harness! There has been nobody on here really help her...they have lashed out at her and others and calling people names. I swear if I see one more post about somebody being lazy...everybody who has that in their post will get reported and banned!!!!

Sierra - posted on 04/16/2010

19

18

1

and i'm not meaning to argue with anyone, or attack anyone, or personally irrate people. i'm just trying to level the ground i stand on. i've given my opinion, and i've given facts. hopefully the mum who made this post will see through the childish comments, outraged posts, and just see the help she's receiving ! =] i hope, and apologize if i have, i don't offend anyone!!! just trying to help. =]

Amy - posted on 04/16/2010

31

18

5

I always think about how many moms have said "I just turned my back for a second and he was gone"! I think they are a great tool to use in crowded situations. The zoo, the fair, and other places where they want to run, but you need them close! Once my child starts to walk and I can't strap him in a stroller anymore, then yes, I will use one.

Jessica - posted on 04/16/2010

345

39

51

My children are not animals but I have used and will probably use a "leash" again in the future. I have five little critters and they are very well behaved children but no matter how well behaved they are kids and they like to roam. The only time I ever really used one was with my first at the zoo. He was around 19mths and didn't want to sit and didn't want to be held so I put one so he could roam but in a controlled, safe way. I wasn't that I wanted to "control" him as much as make sure if someone seperated us somehow that there was no chance of someone else taking him.

To be honest I would like to have a leash for my 8 yr old, my younger children are just fine :).

To each their own, whatever makes you comfortable in public. As soon as I see kids with cry collars and monitered behind electric fences I'll start making a stink but all this is is a way to keep tabs on your children while giving a bit of freedom and indepence.

Sierra - posted on 04/16/2010

19

18

1

as i've stated: yes, there are ways in which the idea was a great idea! and i'm sure if used properly all over, they'd be more excepted. but i honestly don't think anyone can not see how much they are abused. it's an excuse to ignore your child, in my eyes, which i've stated is an opinion. however, it does stop them from learning to walk alone. most mothers here have said that they use it to make sure their child doesn't run away. which means, their children know when the leash pulls them back, they stop. so when you start to teach them without the leash, and they run and it doesn't stop, they're going to keep going.if you start your child from stroller to hand holding, and slowly wean of distance from the hand, in my head and from what i've seen, it'll make things way easier! if you skip the teaching vibe and just take the easy way of letting the leash teach, the leash will only teach one thing.

i guess since i was raised to listen or be punished, i don't understand the big deal. and when i was kid, you controlled your children with manners and teaching. mums today have become lazy. they are using easier and easier things to "handle" their kids. having a child isn't meant to teach you to "handle" your kids. it's meant for you to pass knowledge, understand, street-smarts, brain-smarts, and manners to your children. if you can't handle that, maybe you should consider your mothering ways and sit back and reflect on your real reason for doing certain things. i know when i was a child, my mum and daddy didn't enjoy giving me a butt-whooping, but when i got them it's because i was ignorant and knew better and chose to be dumb. no, butt-whooping today isn't accepted, but back then it was. and if you pushed the limits and knew better, you got it. if you were just learning, my parents stopped, showed me, and taught me.


again, i'm not arguing with anyone! to each your very very unique own. but i am saying, of course they were meant for safety and precautions, but of course, the generations of parents today aren't as hands on as those previous, but it's the technology we have at hand. we'd rather let Leapster teach our children how to read, than us take the time too. Which again i'm not against! Technology advances for our enjoyment and use, however somethings are just lazy and an easy excuse. to me, the leash is NOT used for safety and precautions, it's used to lazily handle an untaught child instead of taking the time. and for those who say, "well i have 89743 kids and it helps," this is what i mean. if you can't control having more kids, then don't. back in the day, once you couldn't handle the children, you stopped having them. i want a large family! however if i come to term with the fact that i can't do life having that many children, i'll stop. it's for the well being and the intelligence of the child.

my final thing about the leash is it's simply taking hte parent out of the child. if a parent would take the time to discipline and teach their children, instead of letting a leash, computer, etc. do it, then the technology we have that are making things easier would be used the way they were meant, not abused as they are now.

Tanya - posted on 04/16/2010

77

10

8

I wonder how many of the parents who are against leashes have more than one child and if they do, how close in age are they? When I was pregnant with my second daughter, I had a difficult time chasing after my two year old. Two year olds have no attention span, and not great memory retention either. No matter how hard you try, a two year old is a two year old, full of energy and ready to run. When I was doing laundry at the laundromat, my two year old decided to run out the door. I ran after her as fast as my eight month old pregnant belly would let me and I just barely made it to grab her by the overalls(thank God for overalls) and pull her back just as a red sports car was whizzing around the curve. I went out and bought a monkey backpack harness. Let me tell you, I'd rather my child be safe then to worry about her getting kidnapped or killed. Do you have any idea how hard it is for a parent to push a stroller AND hold the hand of your other child? Do you have any idea how EASY it would be for some stranger to grab your child's other hand and give a tug? Goodbye child. This is why I am not against leashes. They are a safety device like any other. If parents compare leashes to dog leashes, then I guess cribs are cages too! It is every parent's choice but I do not think anyone should judge someone else for using them. Now my girls are 8 1/2, 6 1/2 and 10 months. By the time Alannah is old enough, we probably won't need one because we have four other pairs of hands and eyes. But when you have lots of little ones, you do what you have to.

Sherre - posted on 04/16/2010

248

27

41

This thread was just asked who uses leashes and who doesn't. Why is everyone being so judgemental and attacking eachother?
My personal oppinion on a "leash" is that I have not and will not use one. Like most moms have said, my child will hold my hand, sit in their stroller or me or daddy will pick them up. To each their own!

Stephanie - posted on 04/16/2010

728

3

64

I don't use one but if you're a parent that does then go you. My son has taken off in a split second. If I had a 2nd child, I couldn't just drop the stroller and run after him. I can see the reasons for using it so it's your choice. & for everyone who says a leash is for DOGS not children and you're a HORRIBLE parents for even thinking of using one...Well how about I say "oh your baby sleeps in a crib, that is just like a cage, do you think your baby is an ANIMAL??? Or prisoners are kept behind bars so why are you treating your precious baby like a prisoner" If you don't use a leash then again go you. Do what works, but I wouldn't talk down on people that do.

Heather - posted on 04/16/2010

15

13

1

To AnneMarie Johnson-best put argument on this page! Well said missus!!

Jessi - posted on 04/16/2010

522

17

49

some parents do overly use them, yes, but personally i do not see how using a leash can "push back the developement of independent walking", if anything i would imagine it would encourage it. my son just started walking on his own for about a month now & when i take him outside on our property i will hold his hand where the ground is uneven to prevent him from falling but he will rip his hand out from mine because he wants to do it on his own. just because a child can walk doesn't mean they fully understand you. some parents might have 1 child who listens & may have another child who they have to watch every second.

Kasie - posted on 04/16/2010

44

14

2

I think they are okay to use occassionally. I think it's ridiculous when people make their kids where them all the time, like in grocery stores. My daughter had one when she was 14 months old, and we would use it if we went to super crowded places because she would say hi to everyone or go up to some random person(she's almost 3 and outgrew that, thank god). She wouldn't listen or hold my hand, and she refused to be carried by my husband or myself. She got to the point where, if she seen the monkey leash was coming out, it meant she wasn't behaving and she would snap up, and hold someones hand. People say, that's what strollers are for, apparently they haven't had a little one who just learned to walk, they are not going to sit in a stroller and be content, especially after they just figured out how their legs work. People are trying to make you sound cruel when they say leashes are for animals and there degrading, the last time I checked, we put leashes on our animals to keep them safe from the road,cars, and other dangers while out and about...am I right? What makes a child any different. Also, I've never seen a child over 3 who had a leash, if the kid was over 5, yeah, that's borderline degrading. But anyone who has had a child under the age of 3 knows at some point in the kids life, they go through a non-listening, rebellious stage. I don't think leashes are necessary everytime you take a child somewhere, but I think they are a good idea if you are going to be in a crowded setting...there are just too many weirdos out there anymore...

Melinda - posted on 04/16/2010

18

37

3

As a mom of three kids it can be very hard to keep track of all of them in crowded places like museums or the zoo. I never had to worry about my boys running off or leaving my sight as they are shy and pretty good listeners. But my daughter who is two is a whole other story!! She is wild and not at all shy, she'll go up to strangers and give them hugs if I'd let her!! We live in a small community where everybody knows everybody so at home I don't have to worry about it as much but you can bet that she'll be put on a leash when we go to the zoo and museum this summer. I'd rather have my kid on a leash then dead in the road or kidnapped by a pervert.

Sierra - posted on 04/16/2010

19

18

1

why not use your hands? i mean, again my big thing against them is it shows you're lazy and that you can't control your child. and though some people may not use it that way, of course i'm sure there are some, however as soon as a parent becomes reliant on a leash, as i've watched develop, it's just an excuse for them to ignore their child. they know their child isn't going anywhere, so they can turn around, shop, talk to friends, etc. etc. and have no eye on their child. and even more, as i've stated before which no one seems to disagree with, is that it slows the understanding of independent walking. i'm only pregnant with my first child, so no i don't have any children, but i have a lot of friends with children, and none of which use a leash. the ones that i've seen use a leash use them for the negative reasons, and their children are the same age as those who don't use the leash, and they can't walk alone yet. it's slowing your child's independent development. again, every mum will do their own thing. no mother listens to any other person because mother always knows best, so no matter what is said here, those who hate it, will hate it. those who enjoy it, will stick by it. but the facts are what set things to be said for someone asking advice. facts are needed, not opinions.

Anne - posted on 04/16/2010

422

8

38

I really don't understand why people object to a leash. If I am understanding what one is correctly - the same thing as reins/safety harness. We use them to keep our beloved pets safe because they don't know about the dangers of traffic and strangers and the same applies to children. I don't think any toddler would say it makes them feel degraded - that is a bit funny. We also use them to keep climbers safe, workmen safe in high up places safe... it's a safety device plain and simple. I put reins on my toddler at the moment when she is walking on hard surfaces. It has a loop at the top so that I can support her if she stumbles and that way she doesn't get bloodied knees, hands and face. Much better.

Sierra - posted on 04/16/2010

19

18

1

about the whole "animals use leashes to be safe, kids can use them too," i'm a firm believer that if my dogs would walk on their back legs for an entire walk, i'd hold their hand and NOT put them on a leash, however i'm not two feet tall, so that's not possible. if a child can walk, he can understand what i'm saying, and if he can't, then he'll hold hands, or stay in the stroller. when i was a child, i hated being in a stroller, so my punishment for letting go of a hand or running ahead was sitting in the stroller. i wanted what i wanted, so i straightened up and flew right. however these days kids are just spoiled rotten, and parents don't want to take the time to enforce punishment and manners on their children. letting your child run in front of you on a leash isn't going to teach him to stay with you, so when he's not on it, he's going to run and when it doesn't stop him, he consider it to be okay. to me, leashes are lazy and are just pushing back the development of independent walking.

Alicia - posted on 04/16/2010

1

19

0

My friend bought one for my sons 2nd birthday and haven't used it yet but I think I might this summer...like when we go to the zoo or somewhere crowed. I have a 6mo. Old and I think it will help since my son wants to be so independent and walk by himself. We tried it on him at home and he loved it. If the kid doesn't have a prob. With it I think its o.k. if ur nervouse ofhim running in the street or getting lost in a crowd. But u should b prepared for looks as u can see some people don't approve

Jessi - posted on 04/16/2010

522

17

49

aren't "reins" horse leads?

it doesn't matter if you call them reins, leashes, leads, harnesses...etc you have them for your pets to protect them in situations that could become harmful. moms have mentioned that leashes are for dogs & that you should teach your children to obey, last time i checked people take their dogs to obediance classes to teach them to obey

Sierra - posted on 04/16/2010

19

18

1

not at all! i HATE leashes. to me, it tells everyone who sees you you can't control your child. holding hands, strollers, and knowing not to run away are the only things you should do to keep your child in place. i mean, to each their own i'm sure i'll do a lot of things with my child that people don't agree with, but to me, i haven't found one person who doesn't feel or see it that way.

Danielle - posted on 04/16/2010

915

38

38

No, I do not believe in putting my child on a leash. He can hold my hand or sit in his stroller, buckled in.

Heather - posted on 04/16/2010

15

13

1

I believe they are called reins-"leashes" are american dog leads-kinda different don't you think?
I had reins on me when I was young and it didn't do me any harm as a particularly hyperactive child I couldn't be trusted not to take flight so they enabled me to be happy walking but gave my parents peace of mind they wouldn't lose me!!
I don't think they are degrading just practical but each to their own

Tarsh - posted on 04/16/2010

2

2

0

As long as ur childs safe who cares what other people think. Some kids just run off. But I seen a more snazzy way of a restarant and it was a piece of elastic 1.5m long with an adjustable wrist band on each. Didnt look an animal restrant.

Jessie - posted on 04/16/2010

333

36

7

Larissa that was quite a childish response about it being true if it made her upset. Maybe it made her upset b/c you called her lazy for a choice she made for trying to keep her child safe!
In my opinion I see no problem with putting a leash on your child to keep them safe. Same reason we have car seats, cribs, high chairs, bed rails for when they get bigger, and any strollers. They are all safety measures to keep our child safe. We can teach them safety as well as use a restraint. I'm not saying you must use one, or that you shouldn't use one. Use one if you think you should and don't if you don't. Why the crap do we sit here and attack others for what they think is right. If it's your opinion I'm ok with it, but we shouldn't resort to name calling, and childish responses to get our points across b/c it doesn't help anyone. I encourage every mother here to do what they think is best and to do it with their head held high!

Crystal - posted on 04/16/2010

1

24

0

I say YES! it's not always about your child listing but if you are in a large crowed you never know who can walk by and what their intentions are especially if you have more then one child to look after and saying thy are for animals is saying a playpen is a cage and is for animls. childern need barriers and help when young and i would rather have my child in a harness i know at all times he is in my reach and out of harms way then wait for the time and say "i just didnt know that could happen..." just my 2cents though

Jessi - posted on 04/16/2010

522

17

49

i don't know if they even make them anymore but if they do i would suggest not getting the leash that straps to the childs wrist...my mom had like that for me & she said it was completely useless because i was able to get out of it without help.

Meaghn - posted on 04/16/2010

30

13

6

I got a backpack one for my eldest daughter because she was a wanderer when she started walking and wouldn't sit in a stroller. So to be able to get any grocery shopping done, without having to sprint down the aisles after her I got a leash. And I have to say it saved us one day in a parking lot, as I was loading her baby sister into the car she darted out, as a car was coming! She got pulled down on her bum, but that was way better than the alternative.

Cassie - posted on 04/16/2010

9

6

0

I personally do not use one, although I will admit that sometimes I wish I had one for my 3 year old son who feels that running away from me is funny. And especially since now I have 3 children. But, not I do not feel that I should use a leash because I just feel weird using one, like I am walking my animal. NOT in any way trying to be rude but I just don't feel right doing it. But, I have considered it. From what some of the other mother have said, I could see how using one in really crowded areas would be a nice way to keep track of them, so this I could definitely see using it. But, for a daily use, I don't think that it is too necessary.

Jessie - posted on 04/16/2010

216

12

23

I think it is a good idea when you are at a festival or fair or something that there are a lot of ppl and a small child can easily get lost even if u are a diligent watchful parent, and we all know how much a child loves to get up and moving when they figure out that they can walk,lol. but as far as just like a trip to the store or the play ground I don't really think it is necessary but then some kids might in fact need them for those little outings and as long as the kid is safe and not complaining who cares, ultimately it is about safety and we all have our own ways and each child is different.

Jaime - posted on 04/16/2010

4,427

24

196

Kaytee, you're arguing apples and oranges...a grown up is usually capable of discerning limits...a child is not!

Jaime - posted on 04/16/2010

4,427

24

196

Larissa, I think perhaps you should take another look at your previous post before you begin a crusade against safety harnesses. You claim that "children should learn proper ways to behave and how to stay safe without being forcefully held back"...well if that's truly how you feel then you must see the problem with your own method of restraining your daughter when she doesn't listen to your "hold my hand" command. If you have to pick her up and carry her, are you not then, 'forcefully' restraining her against her will so that you can get the desired behaviour that you want from her? You claim that it's only for five seconds and then she's willing to listen to you again...but according to your beliefs, children should learn how to behave WITHOUT being held back...so why then do you pick up your daughter? I mean, she should be able to learn how to behave without you picking her up shouldn't she? At least that's what you said anyway. So I guess what I'm trying to say is that you should really consider both sides of a situation before you comment or form an opinion because it's not as cut and dry as you might think. A safety harness takes away the need to physically restrain a child in a department store because they are given limits and they are aware that the limits exist...teaching a child to behave and to respect limits is different for everyone...some children learn better when they have a back-up system and some kids just get it right away...just something for you to think about before you throw out the 'lazy' card at every parent that uses a safety harness! Get over yourself already.

Jada - posted on 04/16/2010

44

30

0

i come from a family of hyperactvie children, and not a single kid, starting with my sister and i and leading all the way to her 2 children, needed to be put on a leash, we held our parents hand or we got to sit in the stroller/cart, we learned very quickly which behavior was acceptable, and had many hissy fits in the process but we were taught it, i have this feeling that by tossing a leash on your child your not really teaching them appropriate behavior. they will just take off the moment you unhook that leash (im trying very hard to not make a baby/dog comparison here) some parents need it because yes it is stressful to live in a large area, and risk having your kid run off or even get picked up in a crowd, but if you are proud enough to put your kid in a harness/leash system, please dont be so tacky about it, and dont buy one of the ones that is disguised as an animal backpack with a long tail, that makes u seem ashamed of your choice, if thats your choice,do it proudly and without remorse, its your child

Samantha - posted on 04/16/2010

20

12

0

Yeah I think it's fine when out in shopping centres, big crowds in public basically. Especially if your child keeps running off, refuses to hold your hand or U have your hands full. When I had my second child I tried with my eldest to have a bit of freedom and walk next to me or hold on to the pram but it never worked so I got a leash and my daughter still had her freedom to walk I was able to push the pram and do my shopping without worrying about losing her. Actually a lady was behind me in the aisle one day struggling with her four especially her youngest and she congratulated me on being able to do that. I have had quite a few positive comments from strangers in doing so. But as every one else has all ready said its your own choice. I thought I would give you a bit of positive feedback

Kaytee - posted on 04/16/2010

2

36

0

Would you want to wear a leash just because your boyfriend doesn't want to lose your drunk ass at the bar? Absolutely not. Pay attention to your children.

Shannon - posted on 04/16/2010

363

24

40

Larrisa,

yes I use one, yes my son is still made to hold my hand, yes I still teach him the dangers all around him everyday, and yes I still watch him like a hawk. I choose to take extra precautions when I take him places like amusement parks, zoos, aquariums, I do not use it in daily situations.

What infuriates me is closed minded people who act as if their way is the only way and make assumtions about the steps that other parents take to protect their children. I didn't read your post and say wow she doesn't care about her childrens safety because she doesn't use a harness so don't assume that mothers that do use harnesses are all lazy parents.

Larissa - posted on 04/16/2010

58

18

11

did that make u upset??
if it wasn't true it would not have infuriated you so much.

Shannon - posted on 04/16/2010

363

24

40

Larrissa, who do you think you are?

leashes are for lazy parents that don't have the patience to teach their children proper behaviour.

S. - posted on 04/16/2010

1,182

9

310

OMG i'm shocked at how people are SO against a safety device and how other mother's are so overly judgemental of other mother's that clearly would only use them to keep there children safe.
my daughter is 2 (she's not treat like a dog) but yes sometime's i use Rain's cos i wont to keep her safe. i use them less as she's learning not to run away and to hold hand's crossing a road ect... but judge away if u wont.
my oldest daughter is 11 and yes when she was a toddler she had some too, she's not mentally scorned for me wonting to keep her safe when she was little.
in england it is not even a issue.

everyone is entitled to there own opinion but i dont know why people need to be so nasty

Shannon - posted on 04/16/2010

363

24

40

Children are humans and humans have an ability to learn and listen. Perhaps you should rather teach your child to obey your commands.

Perhaps you shouldn't be so judgemental about mothers taking extra steps to ensure their childs safety? Further more I find it quite entertaining that you refer to dogs and leashes, say children are humans, but then say "teach them to obey your commands" haha really? Each parent is entitled to their opinion you do not have to agree to that opinion, you should however learn to be respectful of it. I respect the fact that some parents choose not to use them, great that is their right, I have my reasons they have theirs.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms