Has anyone used any other methods to put a toddler to sleep besides the "Cry-it-out" method?

Kathryn - posted on 09/02/2011

Okay people... Email me. KAthryn.Rollo@hotmail.com
It's called SleepSense. Go to www.sleepsense.net to learn more but if you email me I can send the info (copyright laws mean I can't tell you I am sending you the program... But just email me if you want to know more about it.lol) I have 27 mOnth old twins and a 6 month old who ALL sleep through the night thanks to this routine! GODSEND!

Sabrina - posted on 08/31/2011

My husband and I lay our son down in our bed till he falls asleep after his storytime. Once he's knocked out, we carry him to his room and put him in his own bed.

Kelsey - posted on 08/25/2011

my daughter started going to sleep on her own from a very young age (about 5 months old). I would rock her and read to her, and sing, then lay her down no matter if she was asleep or not. If she was looking drowsy, that is when I would lay her down. She evenutally learned to just sooth herself back to sleep if she woke up. Some nights she would wake up, but only a few cries and she went right back to sleep. For some reason, now that she is a toddler, she goes to bed so well for me. I am thinking it is because I had such a tight regimen with her since she was wee-little.

Kellie - posted on 08/20/2011

Maggie is now 21 months old. We have had a toddler bed for her for a about a month now. I have problems being consistant with her, mostly at 5 am in the morning when she walks into our room whining for mama. 50% of the time I take her back into her room and she goes down fairly ok.. most of the time. The other 50% of the time, I am just so tired it seems it would be a lot easier to just pull her into bed with me and her daddy than get up. I know.. pathetic. I think I'm just taking it step by step and seeing how she is. Everyday is little different. Sometimes she doesn't have her afternoon nap until very late, then it messes her bedtime. If she is cranky or fighting sleep, I soothe her and have to give her extra attention, but she does fall asleep eventually and stays asleep mostly. Other times she is completely happy, full of energy, but then boom, she passes out before I know it. I haven't gotten to the point of trying the CIO method, don't really want to, but I have to try to get her to sleep by her self soon. I am always with her in order for her to fall asleep. I don't really want to have to be doing that as she gets older. We live with her cousins, 5 and 3, and they can not sleep with out their parents, mostly the 5 year old. I definately don't want that. I am scared, but I feel as if I have to take it night by night. And of course work harder at being consistant. haha. Don't think I've really helped you, but it's nice to know i'm not the only one out there.

Amy - posted on 08/17/2011

we started to use something Billy loved to hold when we put him down. I really helped. he did cry for a few days but after about a week he got use to it and would go in his crib with out any crying.

Lauren - posted on 08/10/2011

My son just switched to a big boy bed this summer. He's almost 28 months. He loves his big boy bed, I let him choose his sheets and now he even helps carry his stuffed animals to bed. I usually give him a sippy cup with milk and read a couple stories, he has his favorites and will tell me which ones he wants that particular night. I lay with him in his bed and read the stories. Usually, especially if he's tired enough, he'll fall asleep before the stories are over.

Krystal - posted on 08/08/2011

I think I lucked out with my daughter because she was very easy to switch from breast feeding to bottle and bottles to sippy cups and from crib to big girl bed. I haven't had any problems. Although she does have her moments. I live with my parents at the moment so it is hard to get everyone to do what you want when it comes to things with a child. How I got my daughter to go from crib to bed with no problems was we got her a double sized bed and got the bed rails. I put lots of books in her room since she loves books. And at night I give her a bath a cup of warm milk and put her in her room. She either reads herself to sleep (more babbles and looks at pictures) and within 20 mins she is sleeping. I find that if you give them the option to play themselves to sleep and be able to get in and out of their bed as they wish helps them make the choice for when they are ready to fall asleep.

Danielle - posted on 08/08/2011

Have you tried singing and dancing with them, I'm a former Karaoke host so, My son would always cuddle to be sang to even now and he's three, he did however have a sleeping disorder when he was young they call it the 24 hour child, where he would sleep for only 15 minutes a day and be completely fine, good thing i was use to no sleep b4 i had him, but it was hard, I took him to the positive parenting sleep clinic to show me new technique other then the cry it out method. it helped alot.

Nicole - posted on 08/08/2011

I rocked my 2 year old to sleep every night until his brother was born. When he was 26 months old I just started taking him back to his bed and giving him his nighttoy (it lights up and plays lullabies and he's been attached to it since he was 3 months old) and he also got his milk. The first night he kept running out crying and I kept taking him back to his bed telling him goodnight and kiss him and tuck him back in. But I couldn't take the crying either so I started taking him to my bed and he would fall asleep on his own no problem in my bed. So after he would fall asleep I would move him to his bed. After he got used to that, he started asking me to go to bed when he got tired, so I started taking him to his own bed and he just caught on and would fall asleep in his own bed. Occassionally he'll ask me to sit on the floor next to his bed until he falls asleep, but for the most part he doesn't need anyone to help him sleep.

Jessica - posted on 08/05/2011

I HATE hearing my baby cry, but when you're frustrated sometimes all your need to do is step out of the room for a minute. I started putting my baby on a loose schedule (nap time around 1, bed time around 8:30-9) and that helped a lot! I always try calming her down first. We read a book, and when she gets cranky and rubs her eyes, I give her Raffie (a stuffed giraffe, it's her comfort item) & rock her for a bit, hum a song, and put her down. If she tries to keep herself awake, I tell her it's time to sleep and she eventually goes to sleep. Easy as that.

Janessa - posted on 08/01/2011

It is harder as they get older when they are used to something. Cry-it-out works better at a younger age, but what I have always done usually at a lot younger, so I'm not sure if it will work is, I don't take them out of bed for anything, but I will periodically go in there and reassure them tell them I love them, sometimes sing to them, give them a pacifier, but never take them out of bed. They realize at some point they are not getting out and give it up. Usually when you just ignore it, they continue because they might think you don't hear them. But when you go in there they know you do, and then when you don't take them out and are consistent they give it up. Anyways, that's what I've done with my 4, hope that helps.

Kylie - posted on 08/01/2011

maybe a strong bed time routine, bath book bed, then leave her for a few minutes, if she crys then go into her for a few minutes until she calms down. then leave her again. it'll suck for the first few nights, but it will get better. also even if you can't make it work remember there are no 18 year olds who can't put themselves to sleep, maybe all she really needs is time to want to do it alone?

Liz - posted on 08/01/2011

Hi Monica,
we have a bedtime routine, bath, read, bed and then if he wakes in the night we go in lay him down without saying anything and walk out..sometimes it takes 3x sometimes 10 but we never say anything but we go in so he knows he's not alone and just lay him back down or if he is laying down still, just tuck him in and leave...however; I have to say he rarely does this.

Alicia - posted on 07/31/2011

i found reading works the best...my son now 3 won't go to sleep unless i read to him. I used to feel the same way. I'd get sick to my stomach and just want to cry because i was so tired and wore out. Then finally i just started reading to him and BAM! he goes to sleep so much better now

Charm - posted on 07/31/2011

My mom used to live with us when i had my first born. My daughter had colic and cried alot during sleeping time. I found out the she would sometimes get up in the middle of the night to hold the baby so that she would stop crying. She thought i was a horrible mom for letting her cry. So i actually slept in the living room so i can tell her to go back to her bed and to not pick up the baby. I know its hard and it breaks your heart, but crying doesnt hurt them. If she is fed, clean and is not hurting then there is no reason for the child to be crying when its time to go to bed. The crying will tire them out and eventually go to bed. It will pay off when she knows that you will not be picking her up when she cries at bedtime.

Mariah - posted on 07/31/2011

Oh dear. Yes, I still kind of feel that way (she's had some medical problems though). Crying out isn't really an option for her. So we've done lay by her until she falls asleep, making sure she has all of her comfort lovies. She does a lot better when we do a lot of one on one time before. So its like she doesn't have to miss me because I'm around all the time. Its like seperation anxiety I think for mine. She is 26 months old now. And unless she is having asthma problems she sleeps pretty well

Natalie - posted on 07/29/2011

All it takes for my daughter when she does wake up is for me to walk her back to bed (we have a stair gate at the top of the stairs and leave our door open, so she just comes straight into us) then I just give her a drink, tuck her back up and sit with her for a couple of mins until she's gone. This is me being strict on her by the way! I used to let her in our bed every night, but like your LO she wouldn't settle properly and tossed and turned, and kicked her daddy in the face all night. So its better for her to get a good nights sleep in her own bed (and better for mummy and daddy!) She doesn't mind being in her bed though, i think sometimes she just needs a bit of reassurance that mummy is close-by. Good luck, and I know that you will find something that works for the both of you

Monica - posted on 07/29/2011

Thanks everyone that is all SO helpful. It's just kind of funny. Since I just threw all the "rules" out the window, things have been going fairly better. I can rock her to sleep and lay her down in her crib, she wakes up but lets me rub her back for less than a minute and she's out. She then will wake up at 2 or 3 in the morning and that's when I bring her into bed with me. Half the time she is tossing and turning like CRAZY and isn't sleeping at all. Since she was born to just a few months ago she's had 14 ear infections and that was WITH tubes. So, as a single mother I could not bare the screaming, and I did give in. I think I will take your advice and see her Dr. about her tossing and turning or perhaps a chiropractor, although I'm very skeptical of them.

So last question, and some of you did answer, when you have your bedtime routine and your child falls asleep, what do you then do if they wake up in the middle of the night? Do you put a gate up and go every 5 mins to put them back in bed? Do you stay and rub their back until they fall asleep? I can't tell you how thankful I am for everyone's responses :)

Natalie - posted on 07/28/2011

My daughter will be 2 in September and we used the CIO method when she was younger. Yes it works, but what about when they get ill? Would you still let them scream? no. I ending up thinking "sod this, that's my baby and she's crying because she wants me" now I read her a couple of stories at bedtime and then sit and sing to her until she drops off, and yes, she stays in her own bed all night afterwards no problems, no tears. I know a lot of people don't agree with that kind of thing, but you have to remember, they're only this age for such a short amount of time, cherish it. It's not like she's going to want me to sing her to sleep when she's 15 is she?! They will grow out of wanting to be with someone 24/7, I just don't see the need in causing unnecessary stress to them in the meantime. There's plenty of time for them to be alone when they're sulky teenagers =)

Natalie - posted on 07/28/2011

My daughter will be 2 in September and we used the CIO method when she was younger. Yes it works, but what about when they get ill? Would you still let them scream? no. I ending up thinking "sod this, that's my baby and she's crying because she wants me" now I read her a couple of stories at bedtime and then sit and sing to her until she drops off, and yes, she stays in her own bed all night afterwards no problems, no tears. I know a lot of people don't agree with that kind of thing, but you have to remember, they're only this age for such a short amount of time, cherish it. It's not like she's going to want me to sing her to sleep when she's 15 is she?! They will grow out of wanting to be with someone 24/7, I just don't see the need in causing unnecessary stress to them in the meantime. There's plenty of time for them to be alone when they're sulky teenagers =)

Aimee - posted on 07/28/2011

i gave my son a teddy we bought from mothercare and it is ok for babys and he sucks the ear and puts his thumb in his mouth and his blanket and hes asleep try a blanket or teddy and quiet music and maybe a little light with pictures on the ceiling all these worked with all 5 of mine hope this helps and good luck ps the cryin dont work for me

Kristine - posted on 07/27/2011

I found that the best method for me was to lay her down after stories etc and sit in her room for a little while. During night wakings I would have to lay her down, say I love you its sleep time though and mommy is very tired, kiss her and leave. Then I'd have to repeat this process over and over and over. After a couple weeks of being consistent it worked. I know it's ahrd and if you just can't do it then don't. I tried staying in her toom until she fell asleep but I ended up staying up half the night because she'd lay awake as I sat there, so that didn't work. We alo bought her a turtle that's a stuffed animal but also a nightlight that makes a moon and stars on the roof and walls. We also got her this huge moon night light to put on the wall above her bed. PLaying a white noise sound like waves or even a fan could help, or even soft music for her to listen to to help her feel calm and relaxed. ALso, maybe a trip to the doctor to rule out anything physical that may be happening. I know it is so tough because you're exhausted yourself, but I honestly found that by gently, but repeatedly putting her into bed again after she woke up and kissing her good night(even if I had to do it every 5 minutes sometimes) was the only thing that worked. Maybe also you could try taking her shopping for a very special night time stuffed animal to take to bed with her? Or try putting a gold star on the calendar for every night she sleeps all night? Good luck.

Ashley - posted on 07/27/2011

My daughter was the same way I would rock her till she fell asleep and race to put her to bed
Then she would wake up.
As painful as it is to listen to her cry it was to only way to do it or sit in the room with and simply tell her its time for bed I'm here and I'm not leaving you if she's in a bed and keeps getting out you simply keep putting her back until she relizes your serious about bed than she might go to bed for you

Rachael - posted on 07/26/2011

We started a routine with my son when we put him in his toddler bed. We lay him down and tell him his stories. My husband and I kiss all of his stuffed animals goodnight (sometimes his pillow and blanket too) and lay them down. I rest my head on his tummy and tell him how much I love him and sing him the song we made up for him when he was born. Then I tell him "Mommy loves your head, night night head" and I kiss it. "Mommy loves your nose, night night nose". *kiss* ect. I save his eyes for last (when they are getting good and heavy) It HAS to be done each night, which makes an evening out challenging as there is no substitute, but as I am her 99.99% of the time it works for my husband and I. Also, we had a tough transition from the crib to the toddler bed until I realized that he has no problems sleeping in his travel tent. I bought a tent and set the head of his toddler bed in it and the little bit of enclosure helps him feel secure.

Julie - posted on 07/26/2011

Monicca - you've got to figure out why she is crying? Do you feed and burp her well before laying her down? Bubbles can be very painful to an infant - Crying it out should take no more than 3 days - if not, get her to a doctor...
♥ its good for you AND baby to sleep through the night. Starting at 7 pm is early enough to do it...

Carmella - posted on 07/26/2011

Explain to her that she's a big girl and big girls sleep alone you could read her a book afterwards craddle and cuddle with her until shes sleep then lay her down get her a night light and a teddy to sleep with and rub your scent on it so she feels that your there

Bex - posted on 07/26/2011

I used to give my son a shirt that smelt of me, as a reassurance thing, then he upgraded to a dressing gown, That seemed to work as he could smell me so made him think I was There. At the minute my son is now 3yrs old and trying to keep him in his bed is proving to be a nightmare, thats cos he thinks he is missing out on something, housework mainly lol... hope that helps hun... Know how u feel x

Stephanie - posted on 07/26/2011

i used the cry it out method. it worked when she was little, but then didn't work again, when we had to use it again. so now i leave the door open, tell her i'm in the living room and to let me know if she needs anything. sometimes she asks for some water and for me to tuck her back in. i do fulfill her wishes, because she is not asking for it over and over. but i make sure I tell her she's had water, kisses and i put the blanket on her, it's time to sleep. usually i'm tired myself and on my way to bed. so sometimes i add "mommy is going nitenites as well" this has worked great. there is no screaming no fuss. she sometimes talks for a while, but goes to sleep peacefully. we read books or sing before.
try and see what comforts your child.

September - posted on 07/25/2011

Our son went through a phase around the age of 2 where I had to sit in his room with him until he fell asleep. I think he was going through a growth spurt and he wanted me close. So I would sit in his room, I would not talk to him and after about 20 minutes he would be asleep (of course this would follow his bath and bed time stories). I could never use the CIO method because I could never listen to him cry for more than a couple of minutes. Good luck it does get better! :)

Denikka - posted on 07/25/2011

Definitely agree with Sherry. if you feel at ALL like it's anything, rule out any medical problems asap. Nothing like a poor baby with acid reflux or the like.

Sherry - posted on 07/25/2011

From what I've seen there is lots of good advise here but all I have to add is make sure your baby isn't suffering for some sort of medical problem. My daughter had very bad gas issues for a long time and her original doctor would just tell me that kids are difficult... After having days where it took me 3-5 hours to try to put her to bed i brought he to see a different doctor that knew what the issue was and it helped her sleep almost right away... so just rule out other problems just in case

Denikka - posted on 07/25/2011

I have my 28 month old sleeping in a toddler bed. He has since he was about 20 months. Before that, we coslept. Transferring him to his own bed was not a huge deal.

When I put him to bed, I lay down besides him and snuggle him until he falls asleep. From the time he hits the bed to the time he's asleep and I leave, it usually takes about 30 minutes.

He doesn't sleep quite through the night (from 8:30pm to 7:30am) He usually gets up once and comes into my room. I take him by the hand and bring him back to his own room, lay him down and sit beside his bed until he falls asleep again (which can take between 5 min on a good night and 2 hours on a REALLY bad night).

As he's getting a bot older, it's been getting easier and quicker to get him to sleep. It's really not reasonable to expect a small child to fully sleep through the night, and while I would like if he would settle himself when he wakes up, it's ok that he wants mom. The quicker I deal with it, the easier it is to get him to back to sleep. If I let him get to the point of screaming, he's fully awake and I'm back at square one of bedtime.



I don't agree with everything he says, but Dr. Sears says a need fulfilled is one that goes away. My kidlet needs mom in the middle of the night :) so I'm gonna give that to him, especially cause it doesn't take too much effort for me (he usually wakes up just as I'm heading to bed myself)

If you don't feel right letting your child cry, then don't :) You're mom and you're in tune with your baby. Do what feels right and natural. Don't take other peoples advice if it doesn't feel right to you :P I know a lot of people would suggest just leaving her to cry it out.

But I will say, the most important thing in whatever you do, is consistency. If you're not consistent, it doesn't matter what method you use, you'll continue to have problems. Good luck :)

Nikki - posted on 07/25/2011

I wouldn't put her into a toddler bed until you get her into a sleeping routine, trust me it is a HUGE struggle!

My 20 month old goes through phases like that, particularly when things are unsettled in our lives. I think it could be a good idea to try and get her dad and grandmother on board with some kind of consistent routine.

I don't like the CIO method, usually with my daughter I read her some stories, give her a cuddle and pat her back or play with her hair until she falls asleep. The first few times it takes a while but the time frame gets smaller and smaller each day.

Shana - posted on 07/24/2011

I had to do the exact same thing every single night at the exact same time for about two months before bed time with my daughter, so that she finally understood and accepted bed time. I would rock her, sing to her, and when she was all chilled out I would put her in the crib, and then I would sit in the rocking chair so that she could see me, but I wouldn't talk to her or look at her or anything, just so she knew I was there. If she got too fussy and start crying I would just lay her down without looking at her or talking to her and I would play her music box that projected fishes on the ceiling and she would look at those. It took a few weeks (and sometimes two hours a night) but now we go to her room, I rock her a little and she goes into the crib wide awake, and I can leave the room and she goes to sleep. Sometimes she cries for a bit but not very often. She also has her specific bed time babies (dolls) that she knows she gets to cuddle with only at bed time too, maybe you could try that. Good luck :D

Monica - posted on 07/24/2011

Yep, i've tried that too. And she doesn't just whimper unfortunately she just full blown SCREAMS and it lasts 2 hours (that was the longest). She goes with her dad Weds and every other weekend and has been at daycare with my mom, and they all do their own thing no matter what I say. Her dad and I are going to talk soon about how to transfer her into a toddler bed and make sure we're doing it the same way and such, but this is just terrible!

Kristin - posted on 07/24/2011

I have the same problem with my 27 month old daughter. She cries every night, sometimes just little whimpers and once in a blue moon a full fledged fit. We bought her a night light that projected stars on her ceiling and told her just lay in bed and look at the stars. It worked for about a week, but then we went out of town for 4 days and apparently Nana didn't make her sleep alone or something cause now it doesn't do us any good. But it's always worth a try for ya, we found it at Wal-Mart it's a tap light.