Help to un-spoil my baby

Delia - posted on 02/08/2013

The fact that you refer to a 6 week infant as "spoiled" indicates that she is not! Give her a strong base of security and she will know she can trust you, and trust that her NEEDS will be met, and she'll be able to develop into a happy secure baby. Deny her needs and attempts to communicate them, and she will learn not to trust that you will meet them and may just give up. Sad.

Research by behavioral scientists and lots and lots of babies shows that they are not spoiled at this age if they are crying and wanting to be held - even all the time. In fact, they showed that babies left to cry learn that they can't just make a little sound, then gradually fuss more, then cry, then cry loudly, then scream. Instead, they learn to go from 0 to 185 miles per hour in a half second - the only way to get your attention.

It sounds like it's so frustrating for you - and that you are concerned, knowing that you can't be there all the time once you go back to work. In the meantime, you can get a baby sling, or a baby carrier and let her ride around with you like a kangaroo. She may feel better and tolerate time away from you a little better. Once you're at work, make sure that your caregivers are "on the same page" in terms of picking her up and holding her, and not forcing her to cry.

Hang in there! I TOTALLY remember thinking I'd never get the baby off me long enough to get anything done, but you know of course they grow up and don't require you to hold them all day.

Stifler's - posted on 02/07/2013

Mate she's not spoiled this is parenthood. If she starts screaming when she lays down she might have reflux. Or just want you to hold her.

Ruth - posted on 02/06/2013

Try the swaddling, it can really help them, but some babies just really like to be held, all the time. My second child (now 7 mos) was like this, and now that she can sit up by herself is a lot more willing to let me put her down. Some babies also really like being in a swing, and that can work for a few minutes.

Ruth - posted on 02/06/2013

Try swaddling your baby....just wrap a blanket around her torso snugly, but not too tight.
Lie her on her back....this emulates being in the womb where she felt secure.
This may work for you and your baby.

Mary - posted on 02/06/2013

If you are positive she is getting enough to eat---have you tried swaddling her? Some times babies this young are still freaked out by having their arms and legs free. They find a lot of comfort in being swaddled tightly.
Babies can't be spoiled at this age--your pediatrician would say the same thing. Baby just needs mama or comfort. Good luck!
-Mary
thesauerpatch.blogspot.com

Liz - posted on 02/05/2013

I agree that you can't spoil a baby that young, but it SHOULD be possible for you to lay her down by herself SOMETIMES without screaming. Is she getting enough to eat? Oh, and if you know there is nothing wrong with her, it IS ok to let her cry for a few minutes, especially if it is stressing you out.

Christie - posted on 02/05/2013

that's not being spoiled it's called nurturing and doing your job.

Deidra - posted on 02/04/2013

thank you so much

Dove - posted on 02/04/2013

It is 100% impossible to spoil a 6 week old baby. She just spent an entire 9 months (give or take a bit) being held in a warm, dark, comforting environment 24/7... It takes time to adjust to the bright, cold, cruel world that she's been born into. Give her time.... and find a caregiver (when you go back to work) for her that is willing to hold her as much as she needs.

Amy - posted on 02/04/2013

Your baby is not spoiled, she is expressing a need to you. Get a baby carrier if you need to get stuff done.