How do I get my husband to do something romantic?

Jacqueline - posted on 02/16/2010

I agree with Kerry. I had that problem so how i handled it was i "taught" him what romance was without letting him know i was. It worked. The way I did that was I cooked a nice meal, while he was eating, I gave the kids a bath and put them to bed, then ran his bath water for him and got everything ready for him to take a shower. My husband's and my time now consists of just reading the bible together in the morning or evening when we have the chance to or watching a movie together once our son is asleep. Or, we'll ask someone to watch him for a couple hours and we'll go out to eat. It's not much, but we enjoy the time we have together. I'm a stay at home mom and he works at night for 12 hours, so when he's not working he's sleeping durinng the day. When he's up, i'm ready for bed. lol So it makes it hard on us as well, but we figure something out. I just finally accepted that he's not ever going to be the mushy type and we found a happy medium.

Yoon - posted on 02/14/2010

thanks everyone for you input i really appreciate it... so since it's valentine's day ill share what occurred... i surprised him at his job today ((45 minute drive away)) made a home made basket full of goodies ...made a tshirt for our 2 year old daughter to wear saying "dada be my valentine" and on the back it said "check one.. yes or no" lol.. so my daughter and i arrived and surprised him and he was very hapy to see us.. and first thing out of his mouth was... "there is no way i can one up on this" lol..hahahah .. and basically admitted he didnt even get me a gift yet..hahahah so typical of him.. but when he got home he did have a dozen long stem roses (( he has never bought me roses before since he thinks they are a waste!.. got me a wonderful card (( also a 1st for him)) and to my surprise he was romantic...this is as good as it'll get so ill take it!!! hahahahah hope u ladies all had a wonderful vday!!

Vickie - posted on 02/10/2010

I know the feeling we are coming up on 9 years together and 7 months being married. i am slso 7 months Pregnant with our second child.My Husband sounds the same as yours. What if you saved a bit of money got one of the grand parents to babysit for the night. so you could go out for dinner & a Movie. maybe if you tell him that enough he will finally get it and take you out sweep you off your feet for one night. My hubby planed all on his own to take me out this friday geting his Mom to babysit or 20 month old doughter. He is going to take me to a early supper & Movie.It jusy has taken 3 years for him to take me out on a date. So there is hope.

Desirae - posted on 02/10/2010

I have been with my husband since 1996, married in 2001, became parents in 2003... One way I got my husbands attention was to start leaving the toilet seat up... He finally started leaving it down. Maybe some reverse psychology? I initiate it myself often enough that when I don't... he wants to. Maybe it will work for you.

Sheryl - posted on 02/10/2010

i would try doing romantic thing that he wourld find romantic. then he may he do thing that he knows that you feel are romantic. if that don't work i had to till my husbend what type of romantic i mean. i had to give him idea's. that may help some. good luck.

Christina - posted on 02/10/2010

ya i did about the same thing that laura did and it does help to just let them know.Sometimes you have to train them a little to get what you need.

Laura - posted on 02/10/2010

My husband isnt the romantic type either but i kept telling him i wanted him to do something and gave him hints of what i wanted without being straight forward and he did it lol. i also noticed that when i do little romantic things for him it makes him want to return the gesture =)

Kerry - posted on 02/10/2010

hey there, well done for lasting the time you have, I dont think your going to get what you want if he doesnt know how to be that way, so why not take the steps to get the romance from him yourself. Last valentines I put kids to bed, cooked a 3 course meal, we did presents over dinner then took the 3rd course upstairs, to a bed of rose petals and showed him my idea for a romantic night, wont give you the gory details but i had fun nd i know he did then perhaps next year he will get the idea and do something nice for you. Unfortunitaly men think romance is a bottle of cheap wine some chocs and flowers, sex then roll over n sleep off the wine, good luck whatever you do x