I'm not due until May, and I'm so scared of going through the labor. Is it really as bad as everyone says it is?!

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Leigh-ann - posted on 02/05/2009

1

1

0

Hi hun I have three kids, all were natural births, and two were home births. I remember my first and everyone fussing around and telling me what to do and what I should be feeling. In the end I shut everyone out and just stared at the ceiling thinking of the things that would happen once my baby was here, what i would put on him, who he would look like etc and just listened to my body. It can be exhausting and yes there is always pain but the amount is different for everyone. Dont be afraid to tell them what your feeling and dont worry bout how you react, they have seen it all before many many times. Remember this is your birth dont be afraid to tell them your in pain if the time arises. Look into the different pain reliefs now and keep them the ones you might want wrote down on ur birth plan discuss them with your midwife and also remember the after effects they may have :) The pain of labour will feel worse if your not comfortable in your surroundings and dont feel like your in control, yes the midwives will be great at what they are doing to help you thro it but also listen to your body and dnt be made to feel like you dnt know what ur doing, only you know your body and it has been preparing for this for years. With my 2nd child the hospital sent me home because I didnt look like I was in labour an hour later I gave birth to my daughter at home by myself whilst watching tv....my husband came back from the shop to the sound of a baby crying 5 minutes later, it was by far the best experience I had coz I was in control of every second. My third i opted for a home birth and when the time come the midwives just sat there watching me and couldnt believe i was in labour, the only pain felt was when my baby turned at the last minute and decided to come out face first the midwives were more worried than me and I admit it was a little painful but once you have that baby in your arms the worst pain is over.Dont be afraid to ask when you need something or when you need space. Every labour/birth is different just try to make it what you want and remember your about to meet your child who will need and love you forever..now thats the scary part ;) I hope everything goes well for you xx

Rebecca - posted on 02/05/2009

7

16

0

no its not bad, its natural and normal, and beautiful. you don't need drugs to manage the pain, I didn't have any. Woman have been giving birth for a very long time before they had "pain medication." Its really something to feel your child being born. If you want to really experience giving birth then try not needing them. I would suggest a Dula, a professional labor coach, they are very good and don't often cost a lot of $. they will work with you on a sliding scale, usually.

Erin - posted on 02/04/2009

1

16

0

Here is how I described it for everyone who asks that doesn't have kids yet.  Imagine that you have come down with he flu.  You have a fever, vomiting, the chills and haven't slept well in days.  You really feel like you are going to die any minute, you are exhausted and you are NEVER going to get any better.  Then, all of a sudden you are better and you look back at being sick and say to yourself, boy that wasn't all that bad.  At the time it seemed like the worst possible thing to go through but it really wasn't that bad.  That is what I think my labor was like. 



I totally went for the epidural and knew I was going to ask for it from the get go.  It wasn't that I chickened out at all.  I believe that God made man smart enough to come up with pain management medications and that if we wish to use it we should without regret.  Granted it only took the extreme pain away so I could be more focused.  I still felt every contraction and pushing but it really wasn't so bad as to make me never ever want to do it agian. 



You'll be fine!  Relax and totally enjoy the time you have before your little one comes because when he/she does life as you know it will never be the same.  Showering becomes a luxury! 

[deleted account]

It Hurts.. I had a 54hour 100% natural labor/brith  2.5hrs of Pushing. Dont be scared though because this is what our bodies are designed to do, and you will be just fine. The second they come into your arms the pain is gone and I personally have to struggle to remember it.



Congrats on your bubba



 

Lyndsi - posted on 02/04/2009

7

9

0

Im about too have my second in April, and after my first experience i was kinda freaking out too. My first didn't go well, after 27 hours of contractions i was excausted and nothing was really happening as far as dialating or dropping. i tried fentinal and it make me throw up, and laughing gas made me throw up. After all that they were worried about my daughter so i had a c-section, by this time i was relieved.
Anyways what made me feel better was that, in my head, iv allowed myself that if i need it im going to get an epaderal. That made me feel so much better. I watched a mom deliver twins on tv, AS HAPPY AS CAN BE!!!! because she wasn't in pain. I thought....now...i can do that. I never got to the pushing part, so i dont know, my friend tells me that it was a relief to start pushing and that she didn't feel pain down there. i was worried about the stretching but she says it was weird but wasn't anymore painful than the contractions. The contractions weren't that bad, well they hurt quite a bit but for me it was the 27 hours of them that made me scared to do it again. I could have done mabey 10 hours and that would have been way better.Epaderal is my safety net now!

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

163 Comments

View replies by

Windsor - posted on 02/13/2009

62

18

6

It is different with everyone. i had wonderful easy drug free labor and deliveries with both of my kids. But it may be different with you. It is alot of pressure. Once that baby is born is is just a feeling of relief

Helga - posted on 02/13/2009

22

2

0

Mine was a nightmare, and it took me about a year to be able to think, talk or hear about birthgiving without going into a fit. But then again, im a whimp, i cant take pain, i even cry if i hit my toe. And the whole thing ran down in 3 hours so by the time my doctor made it to the hospital, there was no time for the epidural i was originally opting for. So i did it without pain relief and i think this was the problem. Next time im definitely getting it.



On the bright side, after its done, you lay down with your baby for a few hours, and it is instantly like how it was before: you are light, you have a relatively flat belly, there is no hard lil head pusing you any more, it is like being human again :) 



 And i think at 9 months all of us would be happy to deliver instantly, no matter how painful :D

Windsor - posted on 02/13/2009

62

18

6

It is different with everyone. i had wonderful easy drug free labor and deliveries with both of my kids. But it may be different with you. It is alot of pressure. Once that baby is born is is just a feeling of relief

Mindy - posted on 02/13/2009

1

14

0

It's normal to be afraid especially if this is your first child.To be blunt YES labor is painful! But as soon as you lay eyes on that beautiful baby the pain stops! There's no way to describe the feeling, nothing to compare it to. I can say that it is the worst yet easiest forgotten pain Ive ever experienced. I gave birth twice using an epidural and it stopped the pain completely. My third child was completely natural (not EXACTLY by my choice) and I'm glad it happened that way. The delivery was obviously much more painful, at one point I thought I'd never be ale to do it. however It made recovery much easier being able to walk on my own afterwards!

Brandy - posted on 02/13/2009

18

3

3

No it isnt if you have a good Dr.   at my Dr.'s office  I met all the Dr.s practicing and when the time came my Dr. was not in the OR. but I knew the Dr. who delivered my son and he was great. I had an Epi but I could clearly feel when to push.  the nurses are also great! they know what you are going thru and they will try to help in any way they can.    being scared is normal. just try to remeber that you are not alone. you have a medicaly trained Dr. registerd nurses and family there for you!    there is no shame in using pain medication esp. if you are scared!   I did and I have a healthy 5 year old boy!

Desiree - posted on 02/13/2009

31

12

5

It's ok to be scared I have 3 boys and I was scared before every labor. The only advice I have to give is relax as much as possible and the more active you can be during labor the faster it goes. I laid in bed with the 1st two, and was in labor for 20 hrs the 1st time and 10 hrs the 2nd time. The 3rd baby I walked aroung the hospital and had him 3 hrs later.

[deleted account]

I was scared also, But I do want to tell you I kept telling myself that it was going to be easy and dont be afraid and that it wasnt going to last very long and I got that stuck in my head and when the day came I had 4 contractions and 15 mins of labor and he was here so to me I think that it all about how you prepair yourself for it and how you think about it in your head....

Ruzanna - posted on 02/13/2009

1

0

0

The solution might be epidural anaestesia. I had it and I didn't feel any pain... I was watching TV while waiting her to come.... and then it took me only 10 minutes to push her out. that's when I felt some pain, but it was more just a pressure than pain. So, don't worry and talk to your doc about epidural in advance...

Sarah - posted on 02/13/2009

68

15

8

i have anxiety which im usually on medication for but was unable to take while i was pregnant so i was terrified of labour i didnt know if i could handle the pain or if i would just melt down right in the middle of everything.i ended up having quite a quick and easy labour for a first baby and yes it did hurt..a lot...i'd be lying if i said it didnt but for me the epidural was definalty worth it and after that things felt much better. even though it hurt like hell and i was nervouse i would do it all over again a million times because the minute that baby arrives you really do forget all the pain

Charlotte - posted on 02/13/2009

12

36

0

i found not thinking about it helped me lol i didnt go to anti-natal so didnt no what to expect at all, it does hurt just ensure you have someone to grab hold of :D as soon as your little one is born all your pain will disappear, i was induced with drip so labour was over and done with within 2 hrs and had the meptid injection which makes u a little sleepy and the epidural, fortunately she was out quicker than took epidural to kick in as was only 18 mins pushing :D Just try to relax, at the time you just go with the flow :D

Bianca - posted on 02/13/2009

1

17

0

Hi... Dont stress too much about i. I had an all natural water birth with no epidural etc. and delivered a 3.97kg baby. I wont say it was easy but the water made all the difference in the world. And try not to listen to all the horror stories out there, I dont know why it is but some moms always try to make their stories sound worse than the next ones. Good luck and be strong.

Melissa - posted on 02/12/2009

108

14

18

I know a lot of people have written their responses for you, and I'm sure I will repeat something that someone wrote but I will still add my two cents.



In Sept. I delivered my little girl completely naturally (drug-free) at a birth center with a midwife without any tearing.

It really is amazing how much our bodies know what to do,and how natural endorphins kick in and work similarly to drugs - without the side effects etc.

Definitely take a child birth class.

But the key is to RELAX!! Find out whatever things help you relax every muscle in your body. With each contraction, I found what best worked for me was to have silence around me, I found something to focus on, and I did SLOOOOW deep breathing!! Worked wonderfully! During transition, it was a little tougher to relax completely (esp as I started wanting to push but had to wait for midwife to make sure I didn't still have a lip left on my cervix). But have a good coach who will help you remember to relax and can grab your attention to help you refocus. The thing I liked most about transition was I don't remember most of it ... not because of the whole "once you have the baby youforget" .... but because my body's natural endorphins kicked in that I went to an altered state of consciousness (sleep-like but not asleep) and I was completely unaware of everything going on around me until a contraction came, and then as soon as it was over, I rested naturally.

I totally look forward to doing it again!

Trust your body!!

Good luck!

Peggy - posted on 02/12/2009

10

17

0

I am a huge worrier!! I worry about EVERYTHING!! I had all of these concerns and scares and it was nothing like I had worried about! I was put in the hospital on Monday April 28th because of preclampsia and I delivered Wednesday April 30th at 6:04pm by c-section! It was the best days of my life. I had contractions on Wednesday starting at 9am they were lasting 50 seconds and coming every 40 seconds. I couldn't have a epidural because I was not dialating which is why I ended up having a c-section. I can't tell you anything about delivering naturally, unfortunetly I didn't get to that point but I can tell you all of my fears to have a c-section did not come true. I felt the best during my c-section as I did through all of my laboring! The recovery was harder for me but that was because I was trying to be tough and kept telling my nurses that I was fine and had close to no pain and I was lieing!! I will no better next time!! The only way I can describe the contractions is a really bad period cramp! Don't be affraid to take the pain medications if you want to it really will help you, I was not able to have a epidural but finally they gave me a pain reliver that was given by a shot and then put into a IV and after I recieved that I was able to roll onto my back and relax, I actually played a card game at that point until they came in to get me prepared for the c-section!! The hardest of all of it for me now that I looked back was the anxieties of meeting my son for the first time!!! You will be just fine!! Fully focus on the the bundle of joy at the end and it will get you through anything believe me! I wish I could really type into words how it really is. You are going to look back at it and think to yourself, why did I EVER worry like I did!!! Much of luck to you!!

Peggy - posted on 02/12/2009

10

17

0

I am a huge worrier!! I worry about EVERYTHING!! I had all of these concerns and scares and it was nothing like I had worried about! I was put in the hospital on Monday April 28th because of preclampsia and I delivered Wednesday April 30th at 6:04pm by c-section! It was the best days of my life. I had contractions on Wednesday starting at 9am they were lasting 50 seconds and coming every 40 seconds. I couldn't have a epidural because I was not dialating which is why I ended up having a c-section. I can't tell you anything about delivering naturally, unfortunetly I didn't get to that point but I can tell you all of my fears to have a c-section did not come true. I felt the best during my c-section as I did through all of my laboring! The recovery was harder for me but that was because I was trying to be tough and kept telling my nurses that I was fine and had close to no pain and I was lieing!! I will no better next time!! The only way I can describe the contractions is a really bad period cramp! Don't be affraid to take the pain medications if you want to it really will help you, I was not able to have a epidural but finally they gave me a pain reliver that was given by a shot and then put into a IV and after I recieved that I was able to roll onto my back and relax, I actually played a card game at that point until they came in to get me prepared for the c-section!! The hardest of all of it for me now that I looked back was the anxieties of meeting my son for the first time!!! You will be just fine!! Fully focus on the the bundle of joy at the end and it will get you through anything believe me! I wish I could really type into words how it really is. You are going to look back at it and think to yourself, why did I EVER worry like I did!!! Much of luck to you!!

Jennifer - posted on 02/12/2009

1

5

0

I have had four kids, all natural, and it actually makes me sad when people regard me like I'm some kid of "superhero" for doing so.  Because I feel like it gives other women the impression that only someone exceptionally brave or strong can handle natural childbirth.  That's so not true!  Our bodies were created to do this, and all of this modern stuff that we can't live without now (not only drugs, but even doctors and hospitals!), wasn't the norm just a short time ago!  Think back 100 years or more- EVERYONE gave birth at home!  For thousands of years, women have been giving birth with only other women around to support them.  Women felt at ease giving birth, b/c it was seen as a natural, commonplace event, not something to be feared. 



 



There is something called the fear-tension-pain cycle.  You can read about it here:



Which would you choose?
Fear, Tension and Pain or
Calm, Relaxed and Rewarding
By Rebekah Russell, Personal Coach


"...Dr Grantly Dick-Read wrote ‘Childbirth Without
Fear’; a pioneering book on the process of
natural childbirth. While it was published in
1943, it remains highly relevant to childbirth
issues today. He describes the ‘Fear-Tension-
Pain Syndrome’ as an explanation of the pain
felt by some women during childbirth. Dr Read
first began to think differently about childbirth in
1913 after witnessing a mother in the second
stage of labour. He pulled out his bottle of
chloroform to administer anesthetic (as
customary at the time, not unlike the use of ‘pain
relieving’ drugs today) however, the mother
refused. Dr Read respected the mothers
request, stepped back and watched the birth
unfold. The mother birthed her baby peacefully,
seemingly in no pain. Read was perplexed by
the calmness of the mother, he expected pain
and suffering, so he asked the mother why she
did not accept the anesthesia and she shyly
replied, ‘It didn’t hurt. It wasn’t meant to, was it
doctor?’



Read became aware that the mother’s
beliefs and attitudes about birth had a profound
effect on the outcome of the birth. He
commented that when he encountered mothers
who birthed their babies without pain or drugs
‘There was calm, it seemed almost a faith, in the
normal and natural outcome of childbirth.’
From these initial observations Dr Read noted
that it has become common in our modern
scientific culture to pronounce childbirth as a
painful medical experience rather than a natural
function of a woman’s body. This creates fear
and anticipation giving rise to natural protective
mechanisms of the body and mind. When the
body reacts to stress the mind makes dramatic
adjustments for what is perceived as the
upcoming emergency.



When a woman
experiences fear during the birthing process the
following physiological reaction takes place:



 The mind triggers the release of
adrenaline into the body,
 Blood pressure increases,
 Breathing rate increases,
 Speed of metabolism increases, and
 Blood flow to the muscles of your
arms and legs increases.



All of these changes prepare you to either ‘fight
or flee’ the dangerous situation. As a result,
labour may actually halt in the first stage. Painful
contractions may be experienced as blood
required for efficient operation of the uterus is
siphoned away to the arms and legs. As a
woman tenses her muscles, pain may also be
experienced as she unknowingly resists the
natural birthing mechanisms of her body. The
uterus is composed of layers of muscle that
work in harmony to bring the baby into the
world. This is the sole purpose of the uterus, no
other body structure or other muscle will cause
pain if it is functioning for the purpose it is
designed. Likewise, the uterus may function
without major pain if the process of birth is
supported. Fear creates tension within the
mother’s body causing physiological reactions
which inhibit the birth process.



If fear, tension
and pain go hand in hand then that tension must
be relieved to overcome fear, and thus eliminate
pain.
Dr Reads’ theory opposed the unnecessary
intervention that was perpetuated by the
medical system at the time and challenged
many of the methods used in childbirth. I find it
concerning that six decades after the publishing
of his research the myth of pain and suffering in
childbirth is still perpetuated.



Thirty years after the theory of childbirth, a
psychiatric doctor, Dr William Glasser
developed another theory, Choice Theory.
Whilst in different fields of medical study these
two men both have complete faith in the power
of the human mind to control the body and
behaviour. One of the key components of Dr
Glasser’s Choice Theory is the idea of Total
Behaviour which consists of four inseparable
components that make up the way in which we
behave. The first component is activity; when
we think of behaviour, most of us think of
activities like walking, talking or eating. The
second component is thinking; we are always
thinking something. The third component is
feeling; whenever we behave, we are always
feeling something. The fourth component is our
physiology; there is always some physiology
associated with what we are doing, such as our
heart pumping blood, our lungs breathing and
the neurochemistry associated with the
functioning of our brain.



Choice Theory states
that our behaviour always consists of the above
four components: acting, thinking, feeling and
physiology. Whilst all four components are
constantly operating you have direct control
over only two; your actions and your thoughts.
Your feelings and physiology therefore are a
direct reflection of what you are thinking and
what you doing.



It is interesting to look at Total Behaviour from a
childbirth perspective. In this example a woman
is in labour and beginning to experience the
sensations of her uterus contracting. She may
be thinking to herself, ‘These must be
contractions, this is going to be unbearably
painful, I hope that I can get to hospital quickly
enough to gain pain relief, what if something
goes wrong, this is scary!’ She also has direct
control over her actions, these might be:



 Complaining about the pain,
 Tensing up in preparation for the
next contraction, and
 Hyperventilating or holding her
breath in anticipation.



The thoughts and actions outlined above will
now impact directly on her feelings and
physiology. She will become anxious and fearful
as a result of her insecure and negative
thoughts. Her physiology will respond to her
heightened feelings of fear and anxiety with the
fight or flee response. This response completes
the vicious cycle of the fear-tension-pain
syndrome opposing the natural process of
childbirth.



The next example explains Total Behaviour in a
positive birthing experience. Once again a
woman is in the early stages of labour. She has
an understanding of how her body will work to
naturally birth her baby. She has practiced
relaxation and positive visualisation in
preparation for acting and thinking in a way that
will help her stay calm during childbirth. She is
not fearful of the experience and knows that the
sensations she will feel are the natural and
efficient working of her cervix and uterus. She
might be thinking ‘I can feel my uterus
contracting perfectly to birth my baby, I need to
keep breathing deeply so my body has the
energy it needs, I can relax and let this labour



take its course, I am safe and supported, I



believe every woman can have a positive
birthing experience and that the answer lies
within our perceptions, the way we think and
act and what we believe.
make this experience all that I want it to be.”



She may be taking the following actions:



 Deep and controlled breathing,
 Relaxation and visualisation,
 Moving actively for tension release,
and
 Positive self talk.



These thoughts and actions will impact directly
on her feelings and physiology. She will be
feeling excited and empowered, calm but eager
to birth and greet her baby.



Her physiology will
respond to these thoughts and actions in a
positive way:



 Her uterus will work efficiently,
 She will have adequate oxygen for
her body to deliver energy where
required,
 Active movements will assist optimal
positioning of the baby for delivery,
 Her positive and happy thoughts will
release prostagladin and oxytocin.
Hormones that will contract her
uterus and open her cervix, and
 Her body will release powerful
endorphins to block the reception of
pain and give her a feeling of
satisfaction.



Women’s bodies are designed to give birth
naturally. Women have an amazing ability to
manufacture the chemicals needed to assist in
childbirth. It is the power of our bodies and our
minds that can create the ultimate birthing
experience.



The power of what you think and what you
believe impacts on your body and the feelings
you experience. Dr Glasser emphasises that all
of our behaviour is chosen. How you think and
behave and what you believe is critical in
making more effective choices. A woman can
seek out accurate information and learn to think
and behave in ways that will assist rather than
hinder the birthing process. I urge you to make
sure you are not a victim of the painful birth
myth!"



 



I hope this gives you something to think about.  I wouldn't tell you this if it weren't true!  Also, I would HIGHLY recommend looking into Hypnobirthing.  It is not like some silly parlor-trick hypnosis with a pocketwatch.  It is a practical, step-by-step way to help you learn how to truly relax your mind and body.  It may also be useful in your everyday life, if you are someone who stresses a lot.



 



Have a Happy Birth,



Jennifer

Megan - posted on 02/12/2009

21

3

0

I highly recommend the epidural!  I got it at the first sign of pain in contractions, and didn't feel anything else until after it wore off and I was holding my baby boy!  So basically, there were NO labor pains.  *I had an awful delivery too!

Michaline - posted on 02/11/2009

22

31

4

I was scared too...and it does hurt, but once the baby is born you completely forget about the pain. It was crazy to me, that I had this beautiful baby boy and the pain I had felt I couldn't remember it. :) Being scared is completely normal, and it will be painful but the joy of having a new baby will out weigh any pain.

Jaime - posted on 02/11/2009

166

90

13

I was scared about the whole labour thing but one i was in labour i didnt care about anything all i wanted was to get my baby out as i was tired my wee man kept me awake all night he arrived at 6.17am weighing 8 pound 12 i wondered how he fitted inside me as im small i needed up having a c secion my we man is now 7 months and i want to have a other baby so it not that bad everyone always go back again its a pain you forget about  

Lucretia - posted on 02/11/2009

10

8

2

Quoting Jessica:

I'm not due until May, and I'm so scared of going through the labor. Is it really as bad as everyone says it is?!



labor is what you make it. don't phic your self out. i had both my children naturally.  labor is very exciting and magical. it is a moment in your life you will never forget. my first child my daughter. was wonderful yet scary. because like you i didn't know what to expect.10 hours later she was here all 5lbs and 12 oz off her. and my son wow. he was over due by almost a week.and they had to induce me but i still gave birth natural.22 hours and 39 min later mircale number two was here he was 8lbs and 10oz  but in the end it was all worth it.my children are a big part of me and who i am. don't worry about labor.  just focus on the out come. your baby. a part of  you and everything else will fall into place.

Leslie - posted on 02/11/2009

3

19

0

dont worry about it so much right now, you have to remain calm and collective for you and your unborn child. i was nervous too and then when the time came for me to have my little girl i was so anxious that all of that pain went away. you are going to be fine, if you get the epidural you are going to be in heaven.

Lauren - posted on 02/11/2009

43

0

4

My advice is take whatever they will give you, if they offer pain relief, say YES. You wont ever complain that your not in enough pain. If they don't offer it, ASK, if they say no, DEMAND. I had the gas, pethidine, and an epidural, I was terrified of the epidural, but i didn't even feel it and it was fantastic, and 20mins later i had to start pushing. people say you can't feel to push if you've had an epidural, but you can, and your body does most of the work anyway. Plus if your really scared of the epidural, do what i did, suck on the gas so hard that you knock yourself out while they are doing it :) I had a super fast labour of 3 hours, but it was still bad, but look at all the women around and think they all had to do it and they survived. They'll put your little baby in your arms and it'll all be worth it. I said i would never do that again, and people say you forget. i don't think you forget but i think it becomes not that important. My daughter is 4 months old now and i'm planning the next. Good luck to you. XXX

Jennifer - posted on 02/11/2009

15

16

0

Guess what! I have great news! No way is it as bad as everyone says. Different people are more tolerant of pain that others so you can never take anyones word for it! I was petrified and I really had a smooth labor and delivery. I know not everyone does and it really is horrible for some people but it is definitaly not always like that. Just go in with a positive attitude knowing you can do it! I advise an epi but some people like to go drug free...if that is the case MORE POWER TO YA but they brought me stuff and I didn't argue haha. Good luck, you will do great. Think of the most dramatic, whiney, wimpy person who is a mother that you know and think...if she can do it...I CAN DEF. DO IT! Thats what I did and really it did help. lol

Kaleigh - posted on 02/11/2009

4

19

0

i went though labour  with out anything to ease the pain it hurt yeah it did but once my gorgeose son was born it was well worth it .... it couldnt hurt as much cause id do it all over again definatley!!x

Karla - posted on 02/11/2009

49

59

5

Hi Jessica. I pretty much agree with everything the ladies have responded with. When I gave birth on August 13, 2008, I was at 4cm then they gave me Pytocin. I was just going to take that and nothing else. After 4 hours, I was at 6cm only and I decided to take Epidural. You can choose any method that you want. One thing that helped me out the most was having my support group. I don't know what the policies are in the hospital that you will be giving birth at. But I gave birth at Kaiser Permanente and they allowed 3 people to assist in my labor. My hubby, mom and mother-in-law were present. They did a great job just coaching me. My mom was massaging my legs and telling me that she loves me. My mother in law was doing the deep breathing with me. And my hubby was holding my hand. The deep breathing technique was definitely helpful. Go in a state of meditation. I know that you will feel some kind of pressure or pain but in the end, it'll be all worth it. :) Prayers to you and yours.

Kelly - posted on 02/11/2009

3

4

0

hi yes it is painful but you will be ok jast think that you will be meeting your new baby at the end of all the pain  and its the most lovey feeling you ave ever had hope it all gose well for you

Kelly - posted on 02/11/2009

3

4

0

hi yes it is painful but you will be ok jast think that you will be meeting your new baby at the end of all the pain  and its the most lovey feeling you ave ever had hope it all gose well for you

Rebecca - posted on 02/11/2009

9

16

0

Every person is different, so you cant just go on what they say.  Of course there is going to be pain and discomfort, but it also depends on the size of you and the baby, also length of labor and how much pain you can tolerate.  I was fortunate, though it was somewhat painful, I can tolerate a great deal of it.  I had both of my children without any drugs.  One thing I can say that truley helps, is acutally taking breathing classes and having a great coach to keep you focused.  The breathing seriously helps your body to relax rather than getting more tense than what it already is.  It is a personal preference, but I will tell any expectant parent to hold out as long as possible on getting drugs or an epideral.  Hope this eases your mind some.  Dont worry.

Charity - posted on 02/11/2009

11

18

1

It normal to be scared I was too with my first but after everything it's totally worth it.  Just excpect the worst then it won't seem that bad.  That what I did.  with my first I had the epiduaral and I found that my recovery time was longer then with my second when I only had the gas.  And my second was a pound and half larger than my first.  Your body just knows what it needs to do.  If you don't know what to do, that's why there are nurses in the room. Ask them. Don't  worry they'll be telling you anyway.  Just take deep breaths and you'll be alright.



Good Luck



You'l do great!

[deleted account]

I loved Being in labour and mine was a long one as well! lol It is painfull but its worth the pain, and you no its a good pain aswell. Dont be scared, its going to happen either way and do you really want to spend the last months of you pregnacy worriying about the labour. Just take it as it comes and enjoy it, x

Bobbi-joe - posted on 02/11/2009

9

30

0

it is normel to be worried but it is actualy not that bad i had my son natural and it was painful but it is well worth it as soon as you get to hold your sweet bundle of joy in your hands but it is not that bad

Lisset - posted on 02/11/2009

152

36

8

For your own sanity, do not listen to everyone that tells you about labor. Especially as a new mom you get so panicky! Labor is different for everyone. I went into labor at 9pm, had an epidural at 10 pm, slept through the night, woke up at 10:45 am and had the baby at 11:13am. I think it was a great experience, but everyone is different :)

Leanne - posted on 02/11/2009

2

28

0

Everyone is different! I have had 4 children, and each experience was so different than the other. I think you will be so overwhelmed with joy you will forget about anypain you may experience. Enjoy the labor, you will have your man there by your side :) .

Leanne - posted on 02/11/2009

2

28

0

Everyone is different! I have had 4 children, and each experience was so different than the other. I think you will be so overwhelmed with joy you will forget about anypain you may experience. Enjoy the labor, you will have your man there by your side :) .

Mirjana - posted on 02/11/2009

1

22

0

It s not soo bad.My english is bad but i ll will try to calm u down a litle bit. I had labor in natural way without any anasthesia and it was all finished after 8 hours. I had bad pains for 2 h but any woman can handle with that. Don t worry.

Samantha - posted on 02/11/2009

9

4

1

If it was so bad do you think that so many women would do it every day, and go back for seconds, thirds and some many more... yes it will hurt, yes you will be scared (only of the unknown) and yes you are goin to absolutely love the finished product :) We are not men, we are made for this, you will be fine :)

Laura - posted on 02/11/2009

11

10

2

Hey, labour does hurt, it'd be a lie to say it doesnt, but it depends on the sort of labour you have, as everyone is different..mine was easier as i had waterbirth...something i hadnt planned for but it was really relaxing and was only in the main stage of labour for about 3 hours, and just think of the outcome, that beautiful baby at the end :)

Melissa - posted on 02/11/2009

57

38

9

Just remember that whatever will happen will happen, and you can't do anything to change it. I was nervous, but my labor was really not that bad. Don't let people scare you with the horror stories of their friend that was in labor for 3 days or something. All will go well, I am sure, and you really won't remember the pain from it at all!

Rita - posted on 02/10/2009

6

20

0

I'm sure we would all like to tell you exactly what to expect but everyone is different, my first was 45 hours of back labor my second was 12 hours of "normal" labor but I survived both...if it wasn't worth it no one would have more then one child.....you'll be fine!! :)

Ashley - posted on 02/10/2009

14

5

2

My only suggestion is if you have the baby natural is to make sure and bring your own T.P. bc OMG the hospital i went to had the worst T.P. i think i have EVER used and you will be glad you did. But just dont worry you will do great i mean come on we were built for this!! :)

Ashley - posted on 02/10/2009

14

5

2

My only suggestion is if you have the baby natural is to make sure and bring your own T.P. bc OMG the hospital i went to had the worst T.P. i think i have EVER used and you will be glad you did. But just dont worry you will do great i mean come on we were built for this!! :)

Amanda - posted on 02/10/2009

66

13

8

It'll be okay. I was really nervous as well. I just had my LO Dec 23rd. He decided to come 2 weeks early. I had it pretty easy. My water broke at 3am. I didn't end up going to the hospital until 5:30am b/c I wasn't really having contractions. THen they started coming on really quick. I had to go with the pain meds b/c I am a wimp and couldn't stop vomting when I had contractions, after that it was a breeze. Connor came a few hours after I arrived at the hospital. He was born at 9:05am. So, only 6 hours! To me, it felt like I was trying to poop out a bowling ball! lol, srry if TMI.

Caroline - posted on 02/10/2009

1

4

0

no Its not that bad! It is a really productive pain, you can feel that your body is really doing something, and an incredible wonderful something it is!!!!! Think "Yes, Yes" as you contract rather than "oh god no!" haha that helped me.

Tara - posted on 02/10/2009

2

1

0

Everyone is different.  I had my first baby at 21 and he was 5 hours start to finish.  My second was 30 minutes of hard labour and now I am expecting my third in april.  I will be getting to the hospital quickly!!!  But no matter how hard it is or how long it lasts, the instant that baby is born, the pain vanishes and all you feel is joy and awe.  It is an amazing feeling.  I actually stated to all the doctors and nurses in the room when my first was born "I could do this again!"  Five minutes after he was born!  They all laughed at me but it was honestly how I felt when I saw my beautiful child. Don't be too scared, no matter what you will hardly remember any of it as soon as he or she is in your arms.

Lydia - posted on 02/10/2009

32

23

7

I was worried too, but it does hurt and when it is all over u will find it is so worth it. when u are going through the labour just try and think about that beautfull little face u have been wating so see for so long.

Jennifer - posted on 02/10/2009

2

4

0

I had my first baby in Sept. '08. I went to the birthing classes and read the books but honestly had no idea what was waiting ahead. I was in labor for 23 hours after they broke my water. I had the nubain through my IV to take the edge off of the contractions. But after that nothing. I wasn't in pain just uncomfortable. But it was the most rewarding pain I've ever experinced. It hurt but it was a good pain. I was so happy to be able to have my daughter that I don't think I noticed the pain. My husband was so supportive, right there every step of the way. I would do it all over again and with no drugs. The next time I would hold off on the nubain until a little later. Don't be afraid it is so wonderful! The best pain that is the hardest to explain to anyone.

Jasmine - posted on 02/10/2009

6

31

0

I know how you feel I just had my son 2 months ago and I was in the same state your in worring if it was going to hurt and how long it would be and all the other million questions running though my head...but all  my worry went away when I went in I had a natual labour with 7 pound baby no stiches and no drugs it didn't hurt like I thought it would the only part that i felt a little pressure was when the shoulders came out but everyone is diferent I hope your labour is just like mine was quick,painless, and fast.

Jasmine - posted on 02/10/2009

6

31

0

I know how you feel I just had my son 2 months ago and I was in the same state your in worring if it was going to hurt and how long it would be and all the other million questions running though my head...but all  my worry went away when I went in I had a natual labour with 7 pound baby no stiches and no drugs it didn't hurt like I thought it would the only part that i felt a little pressure was when the shoulders came out but everyone is diferent I hope your labour is just like mine was quick,painless, and fast.

Lisa - posted on 02/10/2009

36

14

2

Well with my son I had an emegency c section as he was 10 weeks prem, it hurt so much and I couldnt even walk for a week after i had him and was on strong meds for 2 months after. I never want to go through that pain again. With my daughter I had a normal birth it was tiring but didnt hurt and I could actually walk after. You will be fine.

Heather - posted on 02/10/2009

7

8

0

Being scared is normal. I had twins and I was terrified of labor. But when it came down to it I was really lucky. I was 7 cent. dialated and had not felt a single contraction. I went for my routine doctors appt. and he freaked bc my first born was breach and and I was progressing really fast. They were suprised that i was not in any pian but I told them I didn't even know I was in labor. They had to do a C-section and then it was over. I actually felt like I missed part of being pregnant but I guess it is different for everyone. Anyhow stay calm and congrats!!!

Heather - posted on 02/10/2009

7

8

0

Being scared is normal. I had twins and I was terrified of labor. But when it came down to it I was really lucky. I was 7 cent. dialated and had not felt a single contraction. I went for my routine doctors appt. and he freaked bc my first born was breach and and I was progressing really fast. They were suprised that i was not in any pian but I told them I didn't even know I was in labor. They had to do a C-section and then it was over. I actually felt like I missed part of being pregnant but I guess it is different for everyone. Anyhow stay calm and congrats!!!

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms