I really want to start co sleeping with my newborn but...

Stevie - posted on 05/20/2010 ( 16 moms have responded )

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I am PETRIFIED that I or my boyfriend will somehow smother him. Don't give me that "there is no way unless you are drunk or stoned anything bad will happen" speech because accidents can and do happen. After my delivery the hospital was packed and we had to stay in a ward with three other women for two nights and on the second morning I was SO exhausted and sleep deprived that I grabbed the baby out of his bed half asleep to soothe him and then just fell back asleep before I had him tucked into my arm and I just let go!!! THANK GOD for the guardrail or I don't even want to think about what could have happened. My boyfriend and I both woke up instantly and Ethan didn't even notice anything had happened but I still feel awful and sick when I think about it :( I know co sleeping is very good for babies and so I'm looking for recommendations on how to do this in the safest possible way!

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Sarah - posted on 05/27/2010

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We co slept with our son and had a very scary experience that got us to stop. When my lil guy was 3 weeks old he was between me and his dad, i woke up in the middle of the night and found that his dad (who was a very heavy sleeper) was laying on top of him, only his feet were hanging out. His dad didn't even realize. I freaked out and checked on my son and thankfully he was ok. That was very surprising since my ex was a big guy. (6'2" and 320 lbs). So it doesn't only happen if you are drunk or stoned. It's an accident that can happen.



I would recommend buying on of those Co Sleepers that are designed to be in your bed. They have reinforced barriers that are about 5 inches tall that protect the baby.it also has a built in nightlight. They are pretty nice. What i ended up doing was i put his bassinet right up to my bed, it was kinda like we were sleeping in the same bed.

Melissa - posted on 05/27/2010

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I coslept with my LO from the day that we brought him home. Unfortunately my husband would sleep in the spare bedroom because he was uncomfortable and very heavy sleeper. Our son is now almost a year old and I have started putting him in his own bed and it has been great for all of us! If you are breastfeeding cosleeping is the best thing ever... like others have said you will find yourself at the edge of the bed and this little 9lb person with the rest of it.. lol! I would definitely try sleeping with you and your LO first then see if that is good for you, if it is then add your husband in the mix. Good Luck

[deleted account]

Melinda: we moved our oldest out @ 2.5yrs because we were pregnant w/his brother. He's 8 mos and crawling so I'm considering moving him out because hes fallen off the bed a few more times then im ok with...but if you can avoid that then I would suggest they move out when either they choose to, brcause at some point they will likely want autonomy, or when you and your husband would like to reclaim your bed?

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Katrina - posted on 05/27/2010

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Co-sleeping isnt just sleeping in the bed with you. My son is 3 months and for the most part he sleeps in his pack and play which has a bassinet on the top. He slept in the bed with me until I felt better getting in and out of bed after the c-section. His father is a rough sleeper although he says he isnt but how would he know when he could sleep through a hurricane. Anyway, I made the baby a thick pallet in the middle of the bed farther away from him then normal.

Brooke - posted on 05/21/2010

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We have a 7 month old and have been co sleeping since we brought him home from the hospital. We had to do some moving around of furniture in our room so the top and side are against the wall. My boyfriend and I have never had a problem with not having enough room in our bed for our baby. He sleeps in between us or against the wall. If you breastfeed it will be so much easier to co sleep! Once your baby gets the hang of it you won't really have to get up to nurse. Just roll over. Half the time when my son wakes up to eat I don't even remember.

Chelsey - posted on 05/21/2010

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I would be worried too. The only time my daughter has slept with us is when she was really sick and I wanted to be able to monitor her as much as I could. Co sleeping can be a comfort to both you and the baby but personally the risk would outway the reward. There are plenty of ways to comfort your baby and help them learn what security is and that you will always be there. Also I think that having your baby sleep with you would put a huge strain on your relationship with your partner. You won't be able to have the affection that you could have without the baby in the bed. If co sleeping is a must for you they have co sleepers that baracade your baby so that you can roll on them and they can't roll anywhere else. babies R us and I think target have these items

Brandice - posted on 05/21/2010

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Why do you think you need to co-sleep if you don't mind me asking? I think if you feel you just have to have your baby that close to you, get a bassinet or something and place it in your room. Co-sleeping to me is dangerous and can lead to never being able to get your child to sleep on their own. Not judging you, just saying why I never did it.

Jayne - posted on 05/21/2010

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i have co-slept with my daughter since she was born. in a SINGLE size bed. (lol she always ends up in the middle with heaps of room and im the one nearly falling out the side. you wont roll onto your baby. there is no way you forget they are there even when you're dead to the world.
are you breastfeeding? i saw a video that said there is almost zero danger if you're breastfeeding,
because you tend to have them in a safer spot (level with breast, as opposed to higher on the bed near pillows )
the baby only rolls towards you (as opposed to any which way),
and breastfed babies regulate themselves a lot better than ff babies.
not to say you cant do it with ff babies but you just have to be a bit more careful

Christi - posted on 05/21/2010

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my son has slept with us since he came home. we didn't want it that way, but he had horrible refulx and would burp up and choke and i would freak out so it just go to where i would put him on my chest while in a half sitting position with pillows around me. then we moved him to sleep in between my husband and i and even though we are both heavy sleepers and my husband is very active, we have never rolled over on him and i am aware of his every move.

[deleted account]

Thank you for posting this, Stevie! And thank you so much for those links, Sara. :) Because of this, I am looking further into this. I would like to breastfeed my baby and do what is best for him or her, but like so many mothers (I would imagine) I didn't think co-sleeping was even an option these days. You hear so much negativity, you rarely ever hear of the benefits. It really breaks my heart to think that so many mothers are afraid to co-sleep with their babies because of what the media tells them to believe. But, my next question would be: When to ween them off of sleeping with you? ;D

Christina - posted on 05/20/2010

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We live with my inlaws so my hubby, daughter and I share a room. Actually it's a living room, bedroom, and everything-else-in-a-house-except-the-kitchen in one room downstairs. She sleeps in her crib most of the time and it's right against the head of our bed. She can crawl over into our bed when she wants and it's convenient for night-time care like changing diapers, comforting her, and covering her up when she kicks her blankets down. She's 2 tomorrow and has been sleeping with her crib against our bed since we brought her home. If you're concerned about sleeping with your baby in the same bed, try alternating nights, of even a few hours, with your hubby. Maybe try napping with him before you co-sleep with him.

[deleted account]

I don't know that I have any real advice for you except to trust yourself. I was terrified of rolling onto my daughter so I never even considered cosleeping. When she was born the hospital kept her in the room with me, which I loved, and I breastfed on demand. I was so exhausted that when 4 am rolled around a nurse finally taught me how to feed her lying down. I fell right asleep and woke up scared for the life of my child only to find that I hadn't moved all night. She sleeps with us to this day, she's 10mths. Trust yourself, you'll do fine. I recommend not sleeping with the baby between you and your DH, especially if he is a roller like mine!

[deleted account]

We let our sons sleep in a bassinet for the first couple months and then brought them in bed with us. They both slept in the middle (one @ a time). Currently our 3 yr old is in his own bed in his room and our 8 mos old sleeps inbetween us. We sleep w/seperate blankets (my husband and I) and I do not usually put blankets on the baby, maybe on his legs if I do... So we don't have one BIG blanket covering the entire bed. There are things they make that can attach to a bed so the child is in its own bed attached to your bed...or you could put a crib next to your bed w/maybe the side down. I like cosleeping but my husband gets pretty annoyed with it! If I were you I would def. look into a bed that is next to yours but seperate kinda thing...so he's not in the middle of you two! Makes sex REAL tough!!!

Jenee - posted on 05/20/2010

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Have you considered a Sleeper? Sort of a small bed for baby that goes in bed with you. Its hard to describe. Or maybe putting a small bassinet next to your bed? My son co-slept with us most of the time. We were never worried about rolling onto him. If you do it. Just make sure that there are no blankets near the baby. I will email you the link to the sleeper.

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