If my child does not have her dad's last name and he is not on the birth cert. can i make him pay child support without putting him on the bc and changing her last name

Karie - posted on 06/15/2011 ( 108 moms have responded )

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I have a personal question.... if my child's last name is not the same as her fathers.. due to me still being married (but seperated)she has my ex husbands last name.. can i prove he is the father so he will have to pay child support but i don't want him on the birth cert. or her to have his last name.. will talk all advice

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Melissa - posted on 06/16/2011

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Absolutely! The father of my son is not on his birth certificate, and he has my last name, and he still pays child support. The court didn't require a paternity test, but he requested one, and after the possitive results came back they ordered him to pay. He even had to retropay from the day my son was born!

Firebird - posted on 06/15/2011

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Get a paternity test. His name does not have to be on the birth certificate, and your child does not need his last name.

Tiffany - posted on 07/25/2011

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as long as paternity is established yes you can. my daughter had neither and we just did paternity and went to court for child support

Jessica - posted on 07/23/2011

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The name I think everyone gets confused. There is no one to say what your chids name my be. The name you chose to give your child, is the name that is to be the rest of their lives. Unless the child grows up and changes it themsleves or you decide to change it. A DNA test is the only way that you can get child support from the father. No he does not have to be on the birth Certificate. All those records stand as they are, unless you change that.

Jan - posted on 06/16/2011

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It may depend on where you live but here I can tell you

A) you can give the baby any last name derived from your maiden name, legal name, fathers name or a combination of those names.

B) you can't put his name on the birth certificate unless he signs the registration papers acknoledging that he is the child's father. So if he doesn't sign the paper he's not on the certificate.

C) as long as he 1) acknowledges that the child is his or 2) has a paternity test proving the child is his or 3) lives with the child and cares for it acting in the role of the child's father for 6 months or longer you can apply to the courts for a maintenance order requiring him to pay support.



Having an order and making him pay are two very different things however. Most jurisdictions have some sort of enforcement program in place with different stragedies to encourage parents to pay support. I say encourage because there is really no way to force payment. My ex owes over $10,000 to me in unpaid support, so far he has been reported to the credit borough, been denied a passport or federal liscence, had any money owing to him from the government seized, notice of attachments issued to places where he has worked and his driver's liscence taken away. Recently he had his liscence given back claiming he needed it in order to work so they gave it back and garnished his wages so he quit the job. The next step will be a bench warrant but even with that they can't force him to pay :(

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108 Comments

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Kiara - posted on 07/25/2011

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You'd have to check with your state. In GA, your first step would be a DNA test and legitimization to make sure the child is his.

Nikki - posted on 07/24/2011

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she can have your last name, but if he is proven the father, then he is able to have visitations as well. but if it is proved that she is his child, i think that his name has to be on the birth certificate. im not positive though. as long as your child lives with you and he is the father, you can sue him for child support but again that opens up the opportunity for him to be able to have visitations as well if he counter-sues for it. best of luck!

Nikki - posted on 07/24/2011

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she can have your last name, but if he is proven the father, then he is able to have visitations as well. but if it is proved that she is his child, i think that his name has to be on the birth certificate. im not positive though. as long as your child lives with you and he is the father, you can sue him for child support but again that opens up the opportunity for him to be able to have visitations as well if he counter-sues for it. best of luck!

Aimee - posted on 07/24/2011

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yes but u have to do this through a solicitor as i had to do the same but they can ask for a dna hope this helps

Shainna - posted on 07/22/2011

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you can keep the last name but the paternity test will prove he is the father and he WILL be put on the birth certificate

Renee - posted on 07/22/2011

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when i did mine he had the option of a paternity test and refused it my attorney was concerned when i had his last name changed to mine that he could request it being his and the the judge might just say "well he should have his fathers last name" in the end his father signed off on it and never went to court requesting it his name is NOT on the birth certificate he is adjudicated the father and is required to pay child support, and he has my last name. areas are different it is a lot easier with an attorney and if you receive any type of state aide they will help you most often free of charge. best suggestion is if you can have it garnished from his wages or have it go through the child support division in your area do it then they keep track of everything and they will send garnishment requests to his employer when he does find a real job plus the reexamine the case regularly or you can request it if you know he has gotten a real job or makes more money to get your child support adjusted accordingly without having to go back to court a million times. good luck with everything it is a very long and slow process

Renee - posted on 07/22/2011

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when i did mine he had the option of a paternity test and refused it my attorney was concerned when i had his last name changed to mine that he could request it being his and the the judge might just say "well he should have his fathers last name" in the end his father signed off on it and never went to court requesting it his name is NOT on the birth certificate he is adjudicated the father and is required to pay child support, and he has my last name. areas are different it is a lot easier with an attorney and if you receive any type of state aide they will help you most often free of charge. best suggestion is if you can have it garnished from his wages or have it go through the child support division in your area do it then they keep track of everything and they will send garnishment requests to his employer when he does find a real job plus the reexamine the case regularly or you can request it if you know he has gotten a real job or makes more money to get your child support adjusted accordingly without having to go back to court a million times. good luck with everything it is a very long and slow process

Renee - posted on 07/22/2011

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when i did mine he had the option of a paternity test and refused it my attorney was concerned when i had his last name changed to mine that he could request it being his and the the judge might just say "well he should have his fathers last name" in the end his father signed off on it and never went to court requesting it his name is NOT on the birth certificate he is adjudicated the father and is required to pay child support, and he has my last name. areas are different it is a lot easier with an attorney and if you receive any type of state aide they will help you most often free of charge. best suggestion is if you can have it garnished from his wages or have it go through the child support division in your area do it then they keep track of everything and they will send garnishment requests to his employer when he does find a real job plus the reexamine the case regularly or you can request it if you know he has gotten a real job or makes more money to get your child support adjusted accordingly without having to go back to court a million times. good luck with everything it is a very long and slow process

Carmella - posted on 07/22/2011

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No,just file and they will send him papers and he has the option of getting a Paternity test if he is supposedly unsure and this is the same for all states

Krystle - posted on 07/21/2011

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i am actually going threw this right now you do not need to change her last name nor put him on the bc my daughters father is requesting paternity of her but when he is found the father then he has to pay child support same will go for your ex husband

Christina - posted on 07/21/2011

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File for child support, and they will make him sign a waiver of paternity or take a paternity test. He would have to petition the courts to get his name put on your daughter's birth certificate (and if he does, he will be granted that right.) Also, you both have to be in agreement to change your daughter's last name.
But be willing to hand your daughter over for unsupervised visitation once you start all of this. Child support and custody are too separate issues, but I guarantee you that you will most likely be served with custody papers requesting visitation once you do all of this.

Natasha - posted on 07/21/2011

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ge a dna test dunand he will have to pay and she wont have tohave his name or him on her birth sutifikut unles he take it cort

Kristina - posted on 07/20/2011

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Im in NC but im in the same situation or was. My daughters father is not in her life, not on her birth cert. and she has my last name. We went to court, got a paternety test and that was that. It was no problem to get court ordered child support but the main problem is he doesnt pay it because he does not consider her his child although it has been legally proven. Hope your situation turns out better than mine.

Autumn - posted on 07/20/2011

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You don't need them to have the last name or be on the birth cert. to get them to pay child support. Yes you can prove that he is the father. You can request a DNA or go down to The Department of SOuth Services and get child support done though ur state

Celia - posted on 07/19/2011

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u dont have to have the same last name, but i thought they had to be on the birth cert. for the court to award child support.

CHEMEKO - posted on 07/15/2011

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yes you can i did but we had to take a test. i always knew that he was his dad but he dont want anything to do with him so if you want him to help go for i did GOD BLESS YOU

Kiley - posted on 07/13/2011

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I'm no lawyer-and I strongly suggest you have a free consult with one-but that sounds like you'd be having your cake and eating it too. I highly doubt you can make someone pay for your child who doesn't have any rights, and unless he signs his rights away, he will atlear be entitled to fight for them, if you ask for money. I think it's one way or the other, either he's the dad and he pays (you'll prob need to get a paternity test) or he's not and he doesn't pay..

Alicia - posted on 06/26/2011

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No you dont have to change her last name or put him on the birth cert. I went through the same thing. You can file a motion with you local friend of the court for a paternity test and whatever the outcome is the judge can force child support and you will both have a affidavit stating hes the father. you dont have to change the bith cert. unless you want to

Carlena - posted on 06/26/2011

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Laws are different in every state. Contact child support enforcement and vital records in your state.

Jessica - posted on 06/26/2011

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hmmm... I am wondering some of this myself so I looked through it. I am well aware of the can of worms it opens up, as my first child (who by the way is a very sweet kid and is not to be confused with the apple not falling far from the "tree"...) was a product of rape. I am getting government assistance for him, however I was able to inform them of my situation and ask that if they DID go after him, he was not to know where we lived and what-not. I gave him the chance to be involved ONCE and he didn't show (I was trying to let him be involved despite what he did to me), and has not contacted me, so, as far as I am concerned he is a horrible little grown boy, but at-least my son won't see him... unless he grows a pair or goes to court. He is not on the BC. My husband on the other hand is the one I wonder about. He has been gone for about 2 (maybe 3... too lazy to go count) months and I am a disabled woman who cannot work... so I have my SSI... and two kids.... so I am not greedy, I just want to be able to get them a few things (though I somehow manage to afford NEEDS... I would like to be able to buy a couple of things every once in awhile... like toys.... a happy meal.... without scrounging ya know?). I am just wondering how long he has to be gone before I can nail his abusive ass. He has no job to speak of but I want it up their so when he DOES get one I can get it and use it to help support the kids (because I think in different terms when it is just one.... especially since he wanted to adopt my oldest). Thats just my take on it. I let him visit with them (which is supervised visitation with third party being MY choice since if I was their the restraining order would stop him and he was an abuser so... third party...) when he has asked (once) and give him info on the kids when he asks (had that acceptation put in the restraining order for that single purpose). My kids need their daddy... even if he hurt mommy. I will just await him to hang himself so to speak. When he shows little interest, pays no money, and is a documented abuser.............. lets see how it goes when he "suddenly" wants custody of the kids.... oh yeah.......... I hope the judge laughs in his face.

Chrissy - posted on 06/24/2011

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As quite a few people said I think it depends a lot on where you live. I'm in South Australia and went through the same thing with my son's father. But he did not claim to be the father. We had split up before I even knew I was pregnant and during the pregnancy I told him about it, except he didn't want to know about it.

Like Julie from Queensland said, I also could not claim family tax benefit unless I named the father and claimed child support. I didn't even want his money because I would have rather raised my son without any of his help financially, if he didn't even want to claim our son as his own child, and be involved in his life. By that I mean that, I wasn't there to just suck whatever money I could get out of him, as I know that there are many mothers out there who do that, because all they want is the money and don't want or care for their kids to be involved with the father whatsoever because they think (or know) that the father is a total misfit. Nevertheless in my humble opinion, that's the guy who, ladies, you chose to be with and who fathered your child whether you like it or not, and your child/ren have the right to be a part of that man's life, no matter what, that is their birth right. (even if it has to be with supervised access if that's what is necessary).

But anyway, when my son was born I gave him my name (maiden, as we were not married) I didn't see a point giving him the name of a man who didn't claim him and didn't even want to know about him, and here in South Australia you can't name the father on the birth certificate unless the father signs for it anyway.

So anyway because I needed the family tax benefit, I had no choice but to go ahead with court proceedings to get child support. I didn't want his lousy money though. What I wanted was for him to have a relationship with his son, and I would rather have had that any day than a single cent of his money.

I wanted my son to know his father and have a relationship with his father, which was worth more to me than any money, hundreds or thousands. I even offered to call it a private arrangement and let go of the child support agency, so that he could pay whatever he wanted or even nothing if he couldn't afford it, if he would see his child. And no I wasn't trying to buy him off for him to see his child, I just wanted him to know what was more important to me... and it wasn't his dollars. But despite several attempts to contact the father and tell him that, he wasn't interested and even threatened to call police for harassment if I didn't let up. So that's when I gave up the contact, except for one time I wrote him when my son wanted me to, to see for himself if his father wanted him (with no response) and every time I changed address or phone number I always wrote him (with a registered letter that he had to sign for) to let him know the details and whereabouts, so he had no excuses why he couldn't contact us if he ever "changed his mind", and I did this consistently since my son was born.

To this day (which has been 13 years) I would still accept if his father wanted his name on the birth certificate (or my son wanted to change his last name to his fathers) no matter what a lousy father he is, if my son (and his father) wanted it that way, because through my eyes that's my son's right, not mine, it's my son's birth certificate, not mine.

Anyway I guess the father never requested to have his name put on the birth certificate, because that part never changed, and regardless of that he was still ordered to pay child support when the paternity test came back positive.

Finally, I think that if the father wants to have/see or be a part of his kids lives or be rightfully named as their father on the birth certificate, no matter what a screwball he might seem to the kids mother, she should be grateful for her kids that he wants them in his life. Let them be a part of his life, and then they have the chance to judge for themselves what kind of a parent he is, good or bad. You DO owe it to your kids, to at least let them give their father the chance to prove himself to them, and let them decide how they feel about him, not force them to feel how YOU feel about him.

Kenyetta - posted on 06/22/2011

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he don't have to be on the bc and the child don't have to have his last name; the court ppl will make him take a blood test to prove he's the father.

Victoria - posted on 06/22/2011

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My daughter does not have her father's last name. He is on the birth certificate and pays child support. You do not have to put him on the birth certificate unless he take you to court and demands to be put on there. Child support will request DNA to prove he is the father before the child support is put into place. The child support has a website with a lot of the information you may want to look over.

GRACE - posted on 06/22/2011

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I don't think that you would have to change your child's last name in-order to get him to pay child support, but a paternity test may be necessary if he denies fathering your child.

Danielle - posted on 06/22/2011

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I don't know where you live but, Dna is a must b/c he can contest her, once that is final you are able to go back to when you separated for back pay.

Jessica - posted on 06/21/2011

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yea they will just request a paternity test and make him pay for it!!!!! did it with my man!!!

Tarah - posted on 06/21/2011

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Some states will put him on the birth certificate but wont make u change her last name. they (most states) will make you get a paternity test to prove he is biologically the father.. even if he says he is the father or not.. just depends on your state. you can always go to your local DHS office and they can help you with that..

Nikki - posted on 06/21/2011

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yes you can still get him to pay child support....my sons fathers name is not on the birth cert. and he does not have his fathers last name and he still pays!

Cassandra - posted on 06/21/2011

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he does not have to be on the bc, he can ask for a DNA test but you dont have to change her name either, my daughter has my maiden last name and her daddy is court ordered child support, he tried to tell me he was going to have her name changed over 3 years ago, and unlessi go to a judge with him, her name isnt going to change, the only thing the courts will do for him, is make him pay, atleast in NC thats how it is...

Julie - posted on 06/21/2011

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Man I am beginning to wish I lived in the US. Here even child bashers and paedophiles get shared custody - it is shared custody that is guaranted, child support is just a luxury that many mothers don't get. There are a million and one ways to get out of owing child support, and even when the CSA orders child support, a guy can just not pay and is still not considered a bad father by the family court - yet if a woman is forced to work (because sole parents benefits get cut off when your child turns 6) she is then labelled a "bad parent" even if she only works during school hours and when the kids are with their father (or grandparents - as grandparents can seek regular access too) -told she is selfish and obsessed with career even when the courts should know that welfare gets cut off at 6 years old, and dads can get away with only being ordered to pay $12.76 a fortnight if they don't medium to low income, and even then many refuse to pay even that amount.

So yeah, it's pretty much father's are guaranteed to get visitation - or more likely shared custody - while women can't even be guaranteed a few lousy dollars to support their child.

Stephanie - posted on 06/21/2011

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just because a father pays support does not guarantee that he will be given visitation. I know in ohio that it is 2 separate decisions and just because a mother gets support if the father wants visitation then he has to file for it seperately and pay all of the court costs.

Christina - posted on 06/21/2011

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A DNA test will be done, and he will have to pay child support. He could petition the courts to have his name put on the birth certificate, but you have to do the paperwork involved, not just take a DNA test.
Also, be prepared to hand over your daughter for visitation. And be happy when you do it. Either you want him there to help or not. If you don't want him around, then don't go for child support and live your life. If you want his money, then get ready for visitation to start. You can't have it both ways IMO.

Stephanie - posted on 06/20/2011

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You choose weather his name goes on the birth certificate after a paternity test. You can still go after him for child support if they do a paternity test or he admits to being the father to the court.

A - posted on 06/20/2011

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A good friend of mine has three kids and they all have her last name and the father is not listed on the birth cert. He does pay child support but because she did not list him on the birth cert there had to be a paternity test done for the child support.

Paty - posted on 06/20/2011

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WHY WOULD U ask for child support?? ur saying he drinks and smokes,and if he pays child support, probably 50 dlls a month, he has the right to take ur baby every other weekend!! i prefer to work for my baby and don't even get him close to him. just my opinion it's not worth it! i can't imagine having to share my baby!

Alicia - posted on 06/20/2011

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Well I had my daughter back in 2006. The father left me when I was pregnant. I did not give her his last name,but I was told my the state of Maine,The only way he will have to be made to pay child support is if his name is on the Birth certificate.Hopefully this helps you at least a little bit. : ) You can name your little one whatever you want! : )

Kathy - posted on 06/20/2011

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If you take him to court for child support the judge would order a paternity test to be done. When the results prove that he is the father, his name will be on put the birth certificate. I know this from personal experience. If the father of your child wants and asks the judge he can have your child's last name changed to his. I have three children with three different last names. One because I had his father sign a legal document at his birth. My second was born with my maiden name and then when I took his father to court to prove paternity and establish custody my son wanted his last name to be the same as his father's. My daughter has my maiden last name and her dad is on her birth certificate.

Kristen - posted on 06/20/2011

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I would call your local court house and get information from them. It really does vary state to state! Here in WI the father has to be on the BC in order to collect anything from him.....unless you make a private agreement w/o courts.

Shelly - posted on 06/20/2011

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I know that in the state of florida that whoever is on the birth certificate is who is legally the father even if your ex husband isn't the father and he signed the birth certificate in the eyes of the law he is the father regardless of paternity. You can go after the real dad no matter what i'm going through all this right now with my daughter she has my last name and my ex is not on her birth certificate she he requested a paternity test so yes you can still go after the real dad.

Nadine - posted on 06/20/2011

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If you take him to court they will do a paternity test and if proven he is the father will make him pay child support. However it is up to you or him to take the time and pay the fee to go have the birth certificate changed to add his name as the father and no you do not have to change the babies last name to his. Hell you could have given the baby any last name you wanted. My sister just went thru all this.

Keri - posted on 06/19/2011

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I guess I don't understand the question. Is your daughter's father your ex-husband or someone else? Personally, I remember a nurse at the hospital our son was born at saying you can put whatever you want on the birth certificate. Legally, I've always heard your ex wouldn't have to pay support unless the child is proven to be his (i.e., dna/blood tests). Either way, child support is decided on by the court and your ex could probably use the fact that you didn't put his name on the birth certificate as a way of saying you can raise your daughter on your own and don't want his help. It's very sticky and really up to the court.

Lindsey - posted on 06/19/2011

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Yes you can. My 3 year old does not have her dad on her birth certificate and she has my last name...they will make him and the child prove paternity before they make him pay, but you will not have to change anything.

Karie - posted on 06/19/2011

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Thank u to all of u.... really helpful answers.. and to the one who said call Maury.. I know who the father is of my daughter... thanks

Ashley - posted on 06/19/2011

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I LET MY EX BE ON THE BIRTH CERT. BUT MY DAUGHTER DOESNT HAVE HIS LAST NAME!!!

Kelly - posted on 06/19/2011

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it depends on the state. for me, my sons father and i were never married, when our son was born he didn't want anything to do with him. he was not allowed to be on the birth certificate to begin with because we were not married. we went to a case worker, did not go to court and he was given the choice if he wanted a paternity test or not. he chose no. my son has my last name and i believe we had added his dad to the birth certificate after the fact. my son has my last name and his dad pays child support. if you go to child support most states will request a paternity test and if it is his, he will most likely end up paying child support if your not living together.

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