Is it bad if you don't get your son circumsized?

Taylor - posted on 06/09/2009 ( 42 moms have responded )

12

4

2

my son is 8 month old and i havent took him in to get circumsized and i wanted to know is it bad if you don't get it done or what. some people say you don't have to some say that if you don't they will have bad problems when they get older. so i need your guys advise.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Kate CP - posted on 06/09/2009

8,942

36

754

It's a myth that it's healthier to have your son circumcised. Unless you teach your son really poor hygiene then it's just as clean and healthy to leave the foreskin on. It's up to you and your partner to decide if you want to have it done. I would suggest you see a video on it or maybe visit the maternity ward on a day when they are doing circumcision: the screaming alone will turn your stomach.

Tanya - posted on 06/09/2009

518

35

83

It really don't make a difference.. They wont have any health problems as long as you teach them to pull back the forskin and clean that area, I don't have a son but if I did I would have got him circumsized at the hospital after birth just because my husband is and so is most the guys in my family (so I've been told) - But I don't think its bad to get it done or not, I believe its a personal decison that you just have to make. Good luck :) oh since your son is 8 months aready I would not change the decision you made at the hospital after he was born (you decided not to then, why would you change your mind?)

Amanda - posted on 06/12/2009

14

18

0

I had both my sons circumsized. My first son was born in 1999 and his pediatrician was the one who had recommended it. My second son was a decision I made myself and it's better to do it when they're younger as they will not remember the event. If you wre to wait until they are older it will be much more painful and probably traumatizing. As a parent that is entirely up to you, I would not go through it again that's for sure, it's absolutely not necessary these days. As long as he's taught good hygiene, you'll be good to go!

Crystallee - posted on 06/11/2009

1

6

0

No, it doesn't hurt them as babies to be circumsized. In fact, to have it performed as an adult is a much more painful procedure and the recovery time is much longer. 8 months is pretty late, usually they do it in the hospital right after he is born. There are all kinds of reasons to do it or not do it. I did it because it's cleaner, but also for social reasons. I also read an article that circumsized men are less likely to contract certain STDs.

Natasha - posted on 06/10/2009

282

13

36

Quoting Risa:

Personally, I am glad that I had my son circumcised when he was little. He's almost 16 months old now and kicks me when I try to clean him there. He hates it being touched...unless he's playing with it himself. And when they're that little if it's not circumcised you still have to lift the skin to keep it clean so there won't be infection. He was circumcised around 1-2months and he just layed there and let them do it. Didn't even cry. But I don't know what an 8 month old would do. I know that it's more difficult cuz they move around a lot more. And on the other hand my friends hubby never was and he's never had a problem with infections or anything. I guess he kept it pretty clean, although I can't imagine how a 4yr old lil boy who barely wipes would wanna clean under his foreskin. Who knows...do what you think you should or wanna do.


The pediatrican and hospital told us not to lft the foreskin back on our son. Apparently it can cause damage if it is pulled back when they are young. They said it is natural for them to pull it back when they are toddlers in the bath, but you only need to start teaching them to do it themselves properly when they are between 4 - 6 years old.

This conversation has been closed to further comments

42 Comments

View replies by

Guggie - posted on 06/12/2009

454

3

21

Quoting Melissa:



Quoting Guggie:

well i came to the decision of not circumcising when i started intensely studying the 1800s/early 1900s. routine male infant circumcision in american is not based on science or medicine. it was heavily promoted as a way to stop boys from masturbating and enjoying sex. in fact, kellog created the cornflakes we eat today because they believed back then that bland, colorless food would inhibit sexual drives. kellog also encouraged carbolic acid to be poured on female infant clitori. this is our history, folks, just look it up at the local library or online.

here is a timeline:
http://www.geocities.com/painfulquestion...





 






your very right. i had an ex that was circumsized boy guy and i felt so bad for him because basically if you dont have some lotion you cant masturbate!






lol! I don't know if that is a good reason or a bad one but it is funny. DH was circ'd and is adamant that his future sons will not be. It was so important to us that we talked about it before marriage...lol we were both pretty happy to hear that we agreed on the topic (imagine bringing that topic up on a date night!)

Shaniqua - posted on 06/12/2009

53

6

7

I work in maternity, in recent years doctors have be trying to get parents not to circumsized because there is really no extreme need for it besides vanity purposes in later years. Though you would have to give more attention to cleaning the area as you already may have discovered and teach him the same. The only problem will come years from now when he is dating and his girlfriend may have an opinion in that area.

Arwen - posted on 06/12/2009

350

12

30

They used to not medicate before circ, but at least here they numb the area before any cutting is done. Before they went strait to cutting, and it looks like the babies stop crying as soon as it's over, but studies have shown that the calm silence following the circumcision is actually their bodies going into shock. Children experience pain to a greater degree than adults, and the privates are some of the most sensitive areas. It's understandable why they go into shock.



I'm anti-circumcision. There's a reason that it's there. It helps to protect the penis head, and would make sex better for him and his wife. There is no medical reason that it needs to be done. It might look prettier to you, but besides the doctor getting paid extra for it, that's about it.

Katherine - posted on 06/12/2009

46

53

2

First off, anyone who believes that circumcision doesn't hurt the child is severely mistaken. If you want proof, all you've got to do is do a google video search on newborn circumcision and watch one for yourself; it's a horrific scene. There's no reason to circumcise a child. It's completely unnecessary, not to mention unnatural. Teach your son good hygiene and there shouldn't be any problem whatsoever. My son is 2 and a half, we've never had problems with him being uncircumcised. Also, saying that a circumcised penis is preferable for a woman (sexually) seems ridiculous, as an erect penis looks pretty much the same circumcised or not. It's his body, so why not leave it up to him when he's old enough to make the decision?

Mel - posted on 06/12/2009

5,539

58

226

Quoting Guggie:

well i came to the decision of not circumcising when i started intensely studying the 1800s/early 1900s. routine male infant circumcision in american is not based on science or medicine. it was heavily promoted as a way to stop boys from masturbating and enjoying sex. in fact, kellog created the cornflakes we eat today because they believed back then that bland, colorless food would inhibit sexual drives. kellog also encouraged carbolic acid to be poured on female infant clitori. this is our history, folks, just look it up at the local library or online.

here is a timeline:
http://www.geocities.com/painfulquestion...


 



your very right. i had an ex that was circumsized boy guy and i felt so bad for him because basically if you dont have some lotion you cant masturbate!

Taylor - posted on 06/12/2009

12

4

2

I live in canada alberta and at the hospital that i gave birth at they don't circumsize the boys, they don't even give you the option to get it there. you have to go to a clinic and you have to pay for it. they don't really recommend it.

Guggie - posted on 06/11/2009

454

3

21

well i came to the decision of not circumcising when i started intensely studying the 1800s/early 1900s. routine male infant circumcision in american is not based on science or medicine. it was heavily promoted as a way to stop boys from masturbating and enjoying sex. in fact, kellog created the cornflakes we eat today because they believed back then that bland, colorless food would inhibit sexual drives. kellog also encouraged carbolic acid to be poured on female infant clitori. this is our history, folks, just look it up at the local library or online.



here is a timeline:

http://www.geocities.com/painfulquestion...

Cheryl - posted on 06/11/2009

83

23

5

My son actually did get a yeast infection, they said that although not being circumcized slightly raises the risk, it definitely was not the cause. Plus, it didn't bother him AT ALL. To be honest I just thought it was really bad diaper rash but it never hurt him even when we changed his diaper. When I took him to the doctor and they said yeast infection I was like yikes! my son has a vagina infection but he just laughed and explained that it's actually pretty common among circumcized and uncircumcized boys

App+7mnejhu - posted on 06/11/2009

11

0

1

My son is 6yrs old and not circumsized as long as you teach them to clean it right the older they get it should be ok.

Mary - posted on 06/11/2009

20

37

2

We debated the same problem when my son was born. And Shantanna is right. We did a lot of research and our dr said the same thing. So we decided that it wasn't necessary and chose not to do it as well. He is eight now and has never had a problem w/ it.

Reena - posted on 06/11/2009

15

22

2

My son is almost 2 yrs now and he is not circumsized, he is fine and we never had any troubles with it all. I believe that the fore skin is there for a reason, and until it's needed to be removed it will stay where it belongs. I had thought about it when I was pregnant and did some research on it, and it's aweful how they do it. Also it is no longer covered by medical in Nova Scotia, Canada where I am from it is a cosmetic surgery now. My husband wasn't circumsized at birth, but later in life decided to have the surgery done on his own, and he is happy that his mother gave him that chose.

Natasha - posted on 06/10/2009

282

13

36

Quoting Risa:

Personally, I am glad that I had my son circumcised when he was little. He's almost 16 months old now and kicks me when I try to clean him there. He hates it being touched...unless he's playing with it himself. And when they're that little if it's not circumcised you still have to lift the skin to keep it clean so there won't be infection. He was circumcised around 1-2months and he just layed there and let them do it. Didn't even cry. But I don't know what an 8 month old would do. I know that it's more difficult cuz they move around a lot more. And on the other hand my friends hubby never was and he's never had a problem with infections or anything. I guess he kept it pretty clean, although I can't imagine how a 4yr old lil boy who barely wipes would wanna clean under his foreskin. Who knows...do what you think you should or wanna do.


The pediatrican and hospital told us not to lft the foreskin back on our son. Apparently it can cause damage if it is pulled back when they are young. They said it is natural for them to pull it back when they are toddlers in the bath, but you only need to start teaching them to do it themselves properly when they are between 4 - 6 years old.

Risa - posted on 06/10/2009

13

26

1

Personally, I am glad that I had my son circumcised when he was little. He's almost 16 months old now and kicks me when I try to clean him there. He hates it being touched...unless he's playing with it himself. And when they're that little if it's not circumcised you still have to lift the skin to keep it clean so there won't be infection. He was circumcised around 1-2months and he just layed there and let them do it. Didn't even cry. But I don't know what an 8 month old would do. I know that it's more difficult cuz they move around a lot more. And on the other hand my friends hubby never was and he's never had a problem with infections or anything. I guess he kept it pretty clean, although I can't imagine how a 4yr old lil boy who barely wipes would wanna clean under his foreskin. Who knows...do what you think you should or wanna do.

Charlie - posted on 06/10/2009

11,203

111

401

no way the reasons they use to circumsize boys are the same they use for girls in some countries and there is no way i would circumsize a daughter so i sure as hell wouldnt start hacking at my son ! thats my opinion anyway ! as long as your son is taught how to keep himself clean it should be alright . They dont even offer it in Australia unless its for medical or religous reasons they wont do it just because you want one . its his penis let him decide when he is old enough .

Melissa - posted on 06/10/2009

129

13

12

Both of my children are not circumsized, I have a 3 yr old and a 6 month old. Their father was never circumsized either and he has never had a problem. My theory is that it isn't my body to do that to, if when they get older they want it done that is their choice. If you teach them to clean it and be clean than there wont be any problems. In Europe people don't even think about doing it, and here in the US half of the boys are and half aren't. I own a childcare center and more children are not circumsized. It is your choice so do what you feel is the best thing for him.

Taylor - posted on 06/10/2009

12

4

2

I just want to say thank you all for helping me decide and I'm going to leave it up to him. I'm a singel mom and some times it's hard when you have to decide on your own.And i do not want to put him through that pain at all. Like he just started crowling and he's already got the scratches and all that from try to stand him self up with the tables and it's hard enough to see him crying and screaming from falling and getting scratches so i could not imagine taking him in to get apart of him cut off. I live in alberta canada and it has winters that last as long as 6 has a bath every night and i make sure he is clean, so i don't think its going to be a problem.But I want to say THANK YOU to every one on there advise it realy helped me.

User - posted on 06/10/2009

10

0

0

I had a really hard time deciding if I should have my son circumsized or not. I researched things online and there were so many conflicting articles. I decided to have him circumsized because my fiancee didn't until he was older and had some problems. (he would never elaborate on the problems) I had it done when he was born and I was a mess over it. I honestly think I was more nervous about the circusion than birth because labor was me in pain this was my son in pain. I called down to the nursery for them to bring me the baby for a feeding and they did they said it would be a minute because he was being circumsized. 2 minutes later they wheeled in my precious little boy sound asleep. he never cried or wimpered. he acted like nothing happened.

Tiffanie - posted on 06/10/2009

184

123

40

Both of my boys aren't done. My son is going ot be 2 and he has no problems. And my 3 month old isnt done iether. Even tho my husband is done we chose not to get thiers done. It also costs money some places. If I was to get both my boys done it would cost almost $800 and personally I can use that money for other stuff like diapers and things they are going to need. My mother in law had a fit when we chose not to do it to our first son. He's doing the whole potty training thing and my husband showed him how to clean himself so now every time he goes on the potty he gets a wipe and cleans himself. It is ur decision no one else's just do what ur gut tells you. Good Luck

Hanna - posted on 06/10/2009

585

9

56

just realize that i forgot to add something: if you do live in the hot climate, there still isn't a medical necessity to do it because of all the modern conveniences (like AC) -- your son will not be spending his days and nights in a hot musky rooms the way people did back in the days -- his house, car, daycare, school, and then office when he grows up will have AC and he won't be outside 10-12-14 hours a day every day where it might present a problem. Max was born in Miami where it was ridiculously hot (70 degrees is considered chilly), humid to the point that i had to air out everything in my closet and let it bake in the sun every 2-3 months because otherwise there was mold growing in there and took all my birthing/baby care classes there and they still said it was a matter of a personal preference.

if you do live in a hot climate, just change your son's diaper more often (not just for circumcised/uncircumcised reason) and give him some time without a diaper on -- kids do tend to sweat more down there because the diapers aren't breathable so it would actually help for him not to get redness & rashes on his butt or legs where the diaper elastics are and if you do get some redness, invest in a good cream -- depends on your kid which one works best -- with us it was the desitin w/aloe & zinc oxide and for minor rednesses -- huggies baby lotion with shea butter (the new yellow one and they always send coupons for it too) -- you might have to buy a few different ones to figure out which one works best for you (expensive and annoying, but that's the only way around it unfortunately). again, good luck to you!

Hanna - posted on 06/10/2009

585

9

56

I am from Europe where nobody i knew (excluding jewish and muslim religions) was circumsised and my husband was raised Catholic (so was circumcised). We just had a baby 3 months ago and out of respect for him i asked him if he wanted to do it for Max (our son) even though he will not be raised Catholic, he said he doesn't so we didn't do it.

unless you live in a really hot climate, there really isn't a medical reason that you need to get it and places where it's a religious observance (like hebrew and muslim religion origins), have a hot climate and it was probably written into the religion for medical reasons (since when you are in a hot climate, you sweat more down there and that promotes irritations that can lead to infections).

in europe and eastern europe kids are not circumcised and there aren't any horrific accidents or major medical problems associated with it. nor do you need to care for uncircumcised penis any different than a circumcised one (especially in infants). there is actually more risk to get irritations and infections if you do pull back the foreskin than if you don't and if your son takes baths, then you really don't need to do anything other than dry him off afterwards (again without retracting the skin -- the soapy water in the tub will do all the work). the way our doctor explained it to me was that in girls, you don't need to wash them any differently because there's a "hole" -- you wash outside thoroughly and make sure there's no poop in the area and that's good enough. same with uncircumcised boys.

again, the decision to do it or not to do it is strictly yours -- unless you live in the very south of the US and/or the Caribbean where it's really hot and really humid, there are no medical reasons to do it so it's a matter of preference. as far as when to do it, i would do it now, when the baby is young because in babies, pain tolerance is completely different than in adults (they do go through birth, teething, cutting umbilical chord with no medications) which are all very strong pains that most adults would not be able to cope with without serious meds, so if you are going to circumcise your child, do it at the age when he is still "designed" for higher pain tolerance. good luck to you!

Kathy - posted on 06/10/2009

6

8

0

I had my son circumsised when he was born, its strictly up to you and your partner to have it done or not. My son slept right through the circumcision it really doesnt hurt them the way people make it out to be. I however know that as adults circumcisions hurt very badly I wouldnt recommend holding it off any longer if you do choose to go ahead with the procedure. But again its up to you and your partner there are pros and cons to everything you just need to know whats right for you and your son.

LaCi - posted on 06/10/2009

3,361

3

171

I'm anti-circumcision. I won't get into all that here, since i've already done it in another thread. My kiddo never got cut, the doctor actually said "god bless you" when I said no to circumcision. He's about to be a year, he's fine. My uncut friends never had problems. The natural penis is self cleaning, like a vagina, the biggest problem that usually occurs is a yeast infection which women deal with so whats the big deal? From what I understand its actually easier for a male to get rid of a yeast infection that it is a female. I haven't dealt with that yet.

Natural is better.

Erin - posted on 06/10/2009

6

51

0

honestly it's personal preference, we had our son done to be like daddy and his uncles, it's not barbaric and it didn't hurt or upset him at all. however they say it's more hygenic but if you teach your son how to clean and care for it properly you may never have any trouble with it (my girl friends boys never have). it's like why cut off your breast before you know your going to get breast cancer??

Natasha - posted on 06/10/2009

282

13

36

I saw an ER doctor comment that he did not recommend circumcison, due to the amount of penile accidents he see's during the first few years. He said they need to use the forskin for any re-constructive surgery.

Elysia - posted on 06/10/2009

356

54

6

it really is a personal decision and one that i ended up agonozing over after the birth of my son even though the whole way through my pregnancy and even before i was adamant that i would have my son done. i believe the fact that i had 2 wait to have him done is the reason i didnt where as if it was done in hospital before coming home it woukdnt have been a problem but to hand him over at 6weeks was just to hard. this is not the only reason the we weighed up the pros and cons for both and if it would b better for him to b the same as daddy and b done but b different from all his friends or only b different from dad and the same as his friends. then there was the fact of problems my poor brother has split his numerous times and had a lot of trouble yet we have friends who have never had a drama. so my advice go with ur gut if u wanna burst into at the thought of handin him over (like i did) then dont but wat ever u decide make it about wat is best for him and wat u feel is rite and either way dont let ne one criticise u

Michelle - posted on 06/10/2009

61

63

2

I don't think its a bad thing if you don't want to get it done, I had my son circumcised, but I know alot of people with little boys who didnt get circumcised, it all depends on what you would rather do, personally im all for it and i hate being criticized for doing it by all those "anti-circ" people its quite annoying

Cheryl - posted on 06/09/2009

83

23

5

We opted against circumcizing our son and got a LOT of crap about it from grandparents etc. years ago a lot of people believed that it was unsanitary but the truth is, they should be keeping it clean anyway AND their bodies were made that way, why alter it. I truly pined over this decision and found that in some cultures it is done for religious reason but in others it is done to keep little boys from playing with themselves. Circumcision removes thousands of nerves from the penis making it less sensitive, seemed seriously cruel to go slicing them off to me. You also have to remember that it does hurt and 8 months old seems a little late to me so unless it really bothers you, I would suggest leaving him just the way he is. Either way, you are his mommy and whatever feels right to you probably is. Good luck!

Mel - posted on 06/09/2009

5,539

58

226

no most babies will not have any problems when they get older and they will thank you for not getting it done. alot of boys that have it done get teased especially her ei Australia where it is not common to do circumcision. my hubbys work mate is the only one circumsized and they give him alot of crap for it. here to do it they have to be a certain age and you have to go to a specialist its not something they wil just do without a good reason. do dont worry. it really is un necessary and just done for parents who want to mutilate their child, unless theres a medical reason of course x

Christine - posted on 06/09/2009

37

17

8

For most families the choice to circumcise or not is based on the father's history. There are horror stories on both sides of the fence and it seems to me that both sides have been represented. I didn't circumcise my son and I dont regret it, he just turned 4.

Natasha - posted on 06/09/2009

176

23

27

I have my oldest done and im getting my youngest done as soon as i can. I'm going to share the reason why even tho is extremely embarrassing for me. I was dating this guy when i was 16 and we were sexually active. One night I didnt really feel like it but did anyways. Big mistake. After a few minutes I was like ok this feels off and looked down and seen blood everywhere. I was thinking OMG i got my period and ran to the bathroom but the blood wasn't from me it was from him. His foreskin had ripped really bad and would not stop bleeding. He lived with his grandma and she was out at the time and when she got home we had to explain what happened and that was so embarrassing. She had to take him to the hospital. So after that happened i swore if i ever had a boy they would get circumsized. It might be a silly reason but i would never want them to go through that much pain. They heal much faster when they are babies then when they are older. So I would do it now before he get much older but that just my opinion.

[deleted account]

My son is 9 months and not circumcised. It is really not a big deal - while circumcision is pretty popular in the US (like 60% of babies are cut) it isn't common in many other countries, with no ill effects. Teach him how to clean himself down there, just like you'll teach him to wipe himself and clean behind his ears. And remember that you never need to pull back his foreskin, and neither does anyone else. Only your son should do that once it retracts on its own. There are certainly many benefits to having a foreskin. Also, by not circumcising him now, he still has the choice to do it as an adult if he wishes.

Corinne - posted on 06/09/2009

864

70

188

i personally am all for it and especially when theyre very young and cant remember it! i dated a guy, many years ago, that had it done in his teens and he said it was the most painful thing he had ever gone through! i would definitely get my son circumsized right off the bat! most of the women i know also prefer it circumsized! i certainly do!

Shantanna - posted on 06/09/2009

34

4

2

i am not going to get my son circumsized either because it is really painful and i do not want to put him through that i would rather him make the decision when he is older. it isnt bad not to do it because as a society we are the only people who circumsize our sons without having a medical or religoius reason to. as long as you keep the foreskin clean and teach him how to keep it clean when he gets older than everything will be okay. however if the cleaning starts lacking then bacteria could form under the foreskin causing problems and therefore leading you to need to have the surgery.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms