my 2.5 year old daughter has a really bad attitude! help!

Mary - posted on 01/11/2010 ( 7 moms have responded )

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My daughter is 2- will be 3 in April. I am due in 2 weeks with my son and she has been acting up ever since she got home from her fathers over christmas break. He real dad is in the army and married living in missouri and we live in minnesota so when he comes home its for short periods of time at random moments in her life. Its hard for her to adjust! But ever since she came home this last time shes yelling at me telling me "I dont like you mom. and I dont want to mom. Daycare is even seeing a difference. I dont know if her father plays a part in this or if she is really starting to feel how stressed im getting with this baby comming soon... but i need help! NOW! any thing i do for disapline she rebels.

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Mary - posted on 01/12/2010

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thanks Danielle! I really hope things change... i just really dont want to be so stressed anymore!

Danielle - posted on 01/12/2010

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i'm not sure if threes are worse but i know that my two year old was horrible for me when i was pregnant and it only got worse when i brought her brother home. She's a good big sister now but its a phase. sorry i cant help you with the sistuation with her dad. but i know that as with any child consistancy is key if you slip they will notice and they will think they can push you over everytime!! hope i helped a little bit.

Mary - posted on 01/12/2010

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thanks everyone! When her dad comes to visit he stays at his parents so my daughter is not very disaplined... i dont think he grandmother has ever even givin her a time out! The man iv been with since my daughter was 9 months has been with her everyday and she listens to him but when ever we spank her she says... you hit me! i think alot has to do with her dad asking questions which he does and has asked her in front of me if shes being hurt and what not.... when shes just trying to tell him she fell down or scratched her knee. he freaks... which is understandable but she now is thinking its a bad thing when we spank her. its hard to explain i guess but her dad and I dont really talk. he hates me bc im having a baby with someone else so the same month he found out about me being pregnant he got married to a girl he met while in the army. idk its a screwy situation but all in all im scared to say anything to him... he freaks! All of out communication is when he comes to get her.... i call everyday shes gone but talk to her directly and then to her grandma. it sounds immuture bc it is!!



anyways... thanks for the advice! I really hope i cant get this to turn around.



I hear 3 years old is worse... is that true?

Allie - posted on 01/11/2010

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being only 2 1/2 she learned the i dont like you from some where. she is to young to express herself like an adult. she may be tring to tell you something but dont know how to probably state it. when i had my last baby who is 5 months now, my 3 yr old had a hard time about it. i sat down with her and told her how i love her and i spent more mommy and me time with her which seemed to help. talk with her father about what is happening. she also is probably getting spoiled at daddy's house then comes home to mommy and has rules which kids will act out towards.

Ryan - posted on 01/11/2010

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The most important things iare to be as consistent as possible and always follow through. I mean, if you say, "if you do that one more time you'll sit in time-out." Make sure you really do put her in time-out if does it again. That's just one example, but always do what you say you're going to. As far as consistency goes, make sure you always talk to her, or punish her (whatever method you employ) for the same thing the same way. If a rude remark on her behalf gets her 2 minutes in timeout today then a similar rude remark should earn her the same punishment tomorrow.

Routines are also extremely important. Children need structure, and comfortability. They need to know that they can depend on you and dad (even if in separate homes) to keep things in their life running smoothly and in a manner that they are used to.

As far as her rebelling against your discipline...stay strong, stay firm, stay consistent, and 'up the ante' if you have to. Explain to her that the punishment will get worse for each act of rebellion. Start taking away her toys and tv, and anything else entertaining and put them in another room where she cannot get to them. Even if it leaves her with nothing but books with pictures to look at...that's educational and punishment! =)

Most of all...GOOD LUCK!!!

Amanda - posted on 01/11/2010

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she is prolly actin like this becuz she wanted ur attention.she knw u r abt to have another bby so thhat is the only way to make u notice her.just sit down n talk 2 her n tell her that u will alway luv her even wit the new bby around

Jennell - posted on 01/11/2010

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Sounds like a little of both. Have you called and asked her dad about the sudden change in attitude? Could be a good idea. I know when I was having my second child my first was acting up until about 3 months after my second was born. Same with my second child when I had my third. Its a transition period. Just let her know that the kind of behavior is not going to fly.

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