My son is 1 1/2 and I think he might still be having seperation anxiety. He wont even go into a different room without me being right there with him. I wonder if there's something that I'm doing wrong. I'm a stay at home mom and my world revolves around him. Although I love playing and spending time with him, I would love for him to just be able to play by himself in the living room while I'm doing dishes in the kitchen. How can I get him to be more independant??

Nicole - posted on 02/14/2009

M youngest daughter is the same way, and its really hard to deal with! My suggestion would be to try attending a Mom's of Preschoolers group or just get together with some other moms with kids his age. It always helps if they see how much fun they can have, even without mom right there! It gives them a little independence, without having to be seperated from you. Hope this helps!

Becky - posted on 02/14/2009

Our daughter was the same way for a while. My son is 3 and she is 19 months. Being a stay at home mom has a lot to do with it. Until about 10 months ago I only worked on Friday nights and Saturday nights as a server, so we didnt' have to worry about paying for a sitter for them. SO, we were all that she knew, because no one else watched them. Then I got a full time job, so they now both go to a sitter for a little over an hour every day during the week, and even that little bit has helped so much. Maybe you could look for something like that, get an hour to yourself every week and give the baby interaction with other people and kids.

Sam - posted on 02/14/2009

my son was exactly the same, he wouod pretend there was monsters in the other room just so i would go with him, but i started giving him little challenges and rewarding him, ie;go fetch me something from a different room and iving him a sticker and lots and lots of praise if he did this ok.eventually he will become more independant,dont forget he is only a yr and a half and you have spent all your time together, most kids are exactly like this.myu daughter is like this when she first wakes from a nap she only wants me and will not let me leave her sight,im sure it will get better.good luck

Allenia - posted on 02/14/2009

I had the same problem with Judah and he was the same age as your son when it started. I am a stay at home Mum as well. I think it is normal for children to go through that sort of separation anxiety. I started taking Judah to indoor play centres and to other activities like tumble tots (at a local gymnastics centre), and swimming. I noticed that it took about 3 or 4 weeks time before he would just start going off on his own to play with other children but now when we get to the play centre or the tumble tots he goes off right away to play. He sometimes calls me to come and see something or play soccer with him but it is nice for him to want me to see what he is doing. My Mum always says to me (esp when I was concerned about this subject) that he won't go to university in nappies, not speaking or clinging to you. Children all grow up and they just do it at there own speed. I wouldn't worry too much. I am sure you are doing a great job as a Mum!

Jenna - posted on 02/14/2009

i found that puttin my kids in nursery or play group good.

my 3 year old used to be like that and he wouldnt go any where with other people because he was very shy.

i started by taking him in and doing some drawing with him wile every one else got on with having fun he soon relised that they where having fun and was runnin off with them to play wile i sat down watching, then i would stay there for a wile watchin and would leave for an hour and come back and gradualy built up to leaving him there for the hole day, he now goes 3 days a week and my 1 year old goes 2 days a week they love spendin time with other children there age and i now have some days to myself and i feel they have become happyer within there selfs and get on with there own thing wile i do mine and we enjoy our time together more.

Chloe - posted on 02/14/2009

My son is the same. I'M also a stay at home mum. Ive lately been putting a chair up in the kitchen when i need to cook or do dishes so he feels involved 2. Ive also found putting out pots & spoons so he can bang around gives me 20mins to myself sometimes. I'M also slowly introducing leaving him in a room n closing the door for 10mins. At first this was distressing for him (& so for me) but now he gets upset for a minute then plays and i can open the door go about my chores.

Erin - posted on 02/13/2009

You could host a play group a couple times a week. If you have friends with children , this would make it much easier. The first weeks , he may want you to stay in the room with him while he plays. After getting use to the idea that there are other ways to be happy in the company of others , he may be more accepting of the idea of playmates. You'll still have to be close by , but it is an important step in learning independence and trust in others. Seeing your child develop that skill will be rewarding! You should also plan dates out without the baby , that way , the baby will feel comfortable without you there for intervals of time.

Courtney - posted on 02/13/2009

thank you!! I will def. look for it asap

Amanda - posted on 02/13/2009

i recommend reading the Happiest Toddler on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp he has a lot of great information about this subjec and others