need help with my lil man NOT eating plz help

Shannon - posted on 01/02/2012 ( 17 moms have responded )

29

46

1

hey guys, my son has just turned 2 on the 29th of december and i have been having MAJOR problems getting him to eat its been going on for ages it used to be that if he ate breakfast he wouldnt eat lunch and would only eat half his dinner, not anymore now it is a fight for ALL meals including snacks, i even fell to a low of trying him with chocolate and nothing, im exhausted and scared of his health all gp's and maternal health professionals say "he will be fine he will eat when he is ready kids dont starve themselves" but im really really worried! please help any advice would be greatly appreciated i feel i have tried everything!!!!!

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Kimberly - posted on 01/03/2012

785

23

317

It is very hard what your going through and first off take a deep breath, the dr are right but it feels horrible when you cant get your child to eat. We had an 18 month battle with our daughter to get her to eat food which involved many proffesionals and hospital visit and finally a week stay in a clinic. I learned that quality or qunity is what can count so if you can only get three bites in make them count!!!! Give heaps of fruits,veg,dairy,meats,breads. Try to stay away from the junk food as this is just full of empty sugars and will only get them having the taste for sweet stuff. I have also taken the approach to giving smaller more often meals throughout the day. I put bites of food in little bowl and leave it on her table where she can get to it easy. I also try to offer only healthy things and lots of water. Its hard and there are days where they can eat good then the next three can be crap, but if you are only offering healthy stuff then you know that at least what he is eating is good. My daughter is also two and is now eating at least three small meals a day, she is never going to be a big eater and we know that but what she does eat is good. Yes she does get the odd treat but we try not to encourage it. I know it is very hard but try to take the 'eat it or dont' approach to his eating as if he can feel all your stress and worry over him eating then he can play off that, give him a little bowl of fruit and say 'here your grapes' and walk away. He just might surprise you that he eats good luck and message me if you want some meals ideas!!

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

17 Comments

View replies by

Jennifer - posted on 01/26/2012

23

4

6

I am having the same problem!! My daughter turned 2 on December 20 and for a couple months, I have been having a hard time feeding her. She isnt a picky eater, its getting her to sit down and actually eat! She eats great at daycare, I think it is because all of her friends are sitting down and eating together! We have family meals at home every night but that still didnt help. I have tried numerous things, some of the things that have worked for me are eating later! Even though she eats lunch at daycare around 12, she eats a better dinner at like 7pm, of course she gets an afternoon snack at daycare and I will give her one when she gets home, around 5, just something small, and I let her help me cook dinner, if she helps she seems to eat better! Also, I make the food into faces, or if shes having chicken finger, hotdog, etc, I put toothpicks in each piece so she can pick it up by those and eat, seems silly but she LOVES it!! Just watch with them! :) And the last suggestion I have and I still do with her is we end up walking around the house or she plays with her toys and eats, not ideal but whatever it takes to get food in her little belly!! I cant tell you how many times her babydoll "feeds her" (babydoll holds the spoon and gives her a bite!) or if shes playing on the ground near a table, she takes a bite while hiding under the table, crazy but she is slowly becoming a better eater!! Oh, and I also found out she loves to dip her food in rance, ketchup, bbq sauce!! Good luck, I know its tough and my pediatrician said the same thing, she will eat when shes ready, but Im worried because she is in less than the 1st percentile for weight!! She is 25 months and only weighs 20 pounds!! And if she has a night where she doesnt eat a whole lote, I give her pediasure! They are great, have great flavors, its filling for them and they get the nutrients they need!! Hang in there, we will have better eaters soon!!!! :)

Eschelle - posted on 01/09/2012

17

12

1

omg I have been thru this... I have no idea how to manage it either and it is driving me NUTS! He is slowly starting to get out of it though and I haven't done anything different other than be persistent about still always offering him things.

Jaime - posted on 01/08/2012

25

0

2

My nephew was the same way! My SIL offers multiple snacks throughout the day... he has his own little table and chair and he sits and eats "his food" or snacks there... and sometimes she puts him near the TV because he eats better when distracted! Hope this helps!

Meghan - posted on 01/08/2012

15

0

0

Maybe ask the dr about those toddler meal replacement things from nestle or pedisure. Or try giving him boost watered down with milk (I definately ask the dr about that one first)

Shannon - posted on 01/08/2012

29

46

1

hey ladies thank you so much for the help, he isnt a fussy eater when he does eat but its the getting him to eat part that is the fussiness! he is extremely underweight for his age and height and this is why i am still worried dispite what the professionals have said! i sit down with him for every meal and get him to eat with me but this still doesnt work im just getting to a point where i dont know what im doing wrong :( im off to see the maternal child health nurse on tuesday to tell her i need help and im not leaving her office till i get some serious help i dont want his health to suffer anymore than it already has :)

[deleted account]

Is he growing? Is he average weight? Then don't worry. My daughter is the same way. She barely eats some days. When i fought with her to eat, she didnt. When I let her eat the way her body naturally wanted to, she would barely pick at food for a few days, then eat a bunch for a few days. I say listen to the health professionals. If you fight with him to eat, hes just going to resent food, or you.

Lisa - posted on 01/06/2012

4

18

0

My daughter is almost 3, but in this hot Australian summer I find that she is fine eating fruit or yogurt at dinner time. I know that this isn't a balanced diet, but at least it is something. I bought her a special plate....one I let her pick out. I put a lot of different things on her special plate during the day, which she snacks on. I hope this helps

Hanlie - posted on 01/06/2012

1

16

0

My son is now 3 and everyday is a struggle to get him to eat something. He has a problem with sensory integration and is touch sensitive in the mouth. You can check with an occupational therapist if he has the same problem. There is methods to make the mouth less sensitive.

Regarding letting kids go hungry if they won't eat what is served, might work for kids that has a normal sense of hunger and satiety, but it doesn't work with kids that has sensory issues.

Maybe try to give him nutritional shakes if he doesn't want to eat. Hope this helps.

Clare - posted on 01/04/2012

1

0

0

I started my boy early & he loved everything. Midwife told e 2take away solids until he's 5 &half months as early intro can lead 2allergies. I was worried so i listened. I introduced solids again and he hated eating, I just made sure Wateva was infront of him was healthy, clemantines, grapes, strawberries, cereal, ready brek, he was stubarn 4a long time, at 2 I became strict, he would not be allowed to move until he ate an amount I was happy with, I did feel bad sometimes as he tried the waterworks but I had his best interest at heart, if he heaved I would end the meal as that told me he'd had enough when I hadn't noticed. I never forced him, a meal could take over an hour but I was assured by every mouthful, some he would keep in his cheek 4ages so I'd keep telling him to eat it. He's 2&half and now eats great by his own, breakfast, fruit snacks, heavy meals like a Sunday roast, mutton & rice, pasta bakes, he prefers them over chips & beans etc. He snacks on tomatoes, lettuce, cheese, he gets sweets & treats at reasonable times. Not b4a meal, only after, loves a good pudding, rice pudding or home baked cakes, he enjoys also to help in the kitchen. I would defo use my method again, would rather put my foot down and show him who the mommy is! Lol, he now likes to eat as he boasts his foods making his muscles grow! Lol

Johana - posted on 01/04/2012

5

24

1

I would say not to make a big deal about it to him. Set the rules it's time to eat and if you don't it's ok but when the kitchen is closed you have to wait until the next meal. This is what I do with my kids and it works great. Also make him sit at the table while everyone else eats eve dessert and excuse him when everyone is done.

Elizabeth - posted on 01/03/2012

109

19

6

i went through the same thing with my son who is now almost 4. he seriously only ate like 5 things from the time he started eating solids and hes still like that. I want to say dont worry but i think its smart that you are worried about it because it is your sons health!!!!!!!! I was so worried and went through the same things with my doctor. I read this amazing book called "feeding with love and good sense" heres the link http://www.amazon.com/Child-Mine-Feeding...

anyway the thing that i learned is never to force your child to eat and make EVERY calorie count. I didnt follow some of the things in this book but I make sure that i let him eat whatever he wants as long as its healthy. I still let him have the occasional snack because hes a kid but only after hes eaten something healthy and I dont make it a habit. SO many people said to just give him what were making and if he doesnt eat then too bad. I hate this approach because my sons health was literally failing and I have no idea if there is something actually wrong with him so I refuse to make him eat things he doesnt want. if he wants to LIVE off yogurt and bananas thats fine. I dont know how serious your sons eating is but my son has never tried a potato and wont eat anything on his toast, never tried meat ect. literally eats fruit, yogurt, cheese and bread and pancakes. One thing that has really helped is this little plastic cylinder from safeway that you can make shapes out of pancakes with. I spell fun words and make shapes whatever he wants and we make them together. he loves pancakes so i literally let him eat them 3 meals a day if he wants. I buy whole grain mix, put in a egg and then i put in hemp and flax. If you can stick hemp and flax into anything TRY it. I also give him a multi vitamin and iron every day
ALSO if he is not going to the bathroom every day try lax a day. it will not make him dependent on it and its not bad for them but it will get things moving. I actually take my son to a psychologist because they got really concerned about his eating and one of the things that they are doing is making sure he is regular. if hes not then he wont have an appetite. I know its hard and good for you for caring. Just give him lots of options of healthy things and let him take it from there.
GOOD LUCK! and check out the book, all the nutritionists where i'm from base their teachings off of her work.

Nora - posted on 01/03/2012

39

5

1

I went through it with my first child and everyone has given you great advise. Our dr said to worry more about the weekly intake and not necessarily the daily intake. The best advice I did get and it work wonders when he was a little over 2 was to not give him a fork. We started letting him eat with toothpicks and he started trying so much more food and eating meat (he wouldn't eat meat for 6months). Now that he is almost 4 he still challenges me on eating, but we are now to the point where he understands the rewards system. He has to eat his protein and try everything else on his plate or he doesn't get dessert and I he does go to bed 2 or 3 times a month with no dinner. It's not worth the battle for me and I know he will eat a good breakfast the next morning. GL

Shannon - posted on 01/03/2012

29

46

1

hey ladies thank you so much for all your advise i finally feel like im not alone!!! i will keep trying what i am doing and i will let you know how it goes as everything that has been said i am already doing!! thanks again :)

Caroline - posted on 01/03/2012

65

0

7

Shannon,
My daughter was the same way. As a nurse I will tell you it is normal.Kids are not like adults, the eat to survive not for pleasure. Why don't you try some nutrition drinks and put it in a cup? I did that with my daughter. At this age kids are developing at a start and stop kind of thing. When he starts going through a growth spurt then you will see him really start eating. Don't make food a battle because then he will start seeing food as a battle. Don't worry use the supplements in a drink for formula for kids and he will be fine. Just keep an eye on him and keep him drinking water as long as he is making bowel movements and drinking and laughing and playing your gonna be fine. I promise he will eat. Stay consistant and have dinner at the same time every night and put him in the height chair and offer him something and he does not want it the give him the drink and let him see you guys eating and laughing and with in no time he will be wanting to eat what you are eating because it is something fun. Take it from a veteran mom, don't sweat the small stuff and just hang in there. Let me know if this helps ok? Caroline

Meghan - posted on 01/03/2012

15

0

0

I gave up fighting with my lil man about eating at that age. My fiance pointed out that he was at an age where he realized 'hey I can say no!' And was trying it out. One thing that strangely worked was not to give him his own plate! Me n hubby wld put extra on our plates and he wld eat from our plates because we didn't try to give it to him lol. When he got a bit older I'd just put his plate out. I didn't argue with him or make him stay at the table. Just firmly told him this is your supper. Its there when your ready to eat it and unless you eat you don't get anything else until tomorrow. Most nights hed pick at all night and by bed time it wld be gone.

Carol - posted on 01/03/2012

18

56

2

we have been through alsorts trying to get get 2 of mine to eat, the first one just was too small and doesnt like texture and strong tastes and now lives off yellow foods. the second one we had no problems with but she keeps coming up with reasons why she cant eat... first off dont try and force the food as this will make things worse.. we started off by putting a selection of pickey foods on our table and letting each of them choose what they would eat.. start with party food as it can be easier lots of salad, crisps, chocolate fingers etc so that they feel they can help them selves and stay in control, you can see what food textures they are eating so you can work on it, and also if you have mini picnic's or mini parties they are getting a reward even if its in your living room.... the main thing is to try and remain as calm as you can even if they dont eat a thing, by ha ving fun activities and leaving the food out you are helping to make them hungry but not forcing them to eat.. its great if you have other siblings in the house who will eat and pick along the way... if not invite some friends over to help you have a mock party doesnt need to have many..

watch his weight constantly once a week weigh him to ensure he isnt loosing weight and at this stage if he finds something he will eat let him eat it even if its junk food. once you have him eating 3 meals a day you can worry about what he eats and increase the food groups and textures.... i would also try and use the weight angle to get the dr's to refer him to a nutricianist (sp) so they can give you more on the ball help

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms