needing some advice

Nikki - posted on 01/08/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I have a 7 month old son. And I thought I didn't want anymore kids after him, so I told my husband that I didn't and niether does he. Just because he is 21 and I am 19 going on 20 soon. But I have been thinking a lot lately and I would like another child. Not now but maybe when my son is 1 or 2. Does anyone have any advice about how to tell my hubby that I would like more children in the future?
Thanks!

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Danielle - posted on 01/08/2010

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Well for starters...to say you're 21 and 19 and ready to say you're done having children is just silly. I could understand you saying that if you were 38 and 40 but not 21 and 19. I'm 23 and I'm a completely different person from when I was 19! You could change your minds back and forth a million times over the years. My mother got her tubes tied when she was 26 and she completely regretted the decision. I think I'd just say to your husband, "I think we're still too young to make the choice to permanently make it so we can't have more children. I'm not saying a want another baby right now but I'd like it if we left our options open." And see what he has to say to that. Let him know that your son having a little brother or sister one day could be really fun. In the mean time, you guys could consider birth control like the IUD or Implanon, something that's a little more long lasting than for instance the patch or the pill.

Misty - posted on 01/08/2010

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Be open and honest, you guys are very yound right now and you will probably both change your minds eventually! I didnt ever want kids growing up either I liked to be selfish and spoiled. We had our first at 25 and as soon as I got pregnant I knew I wanted more more more. We have had one more and my hubby says no more. I want another in 5-6 years. So heres what we came up with . We wont do anything drastic like get snipped, and he is keeping an open mind, we will see where we stand then and decide then. As long as he knows what you want, give him time to think and let him know he has a couple years to really be sure. Good Luck

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Misty - posted on 01/08/2010

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Be open and honest, you guys are very young right now and you will probably both change your minds eventually! I didnt ever want kids growing up either I liked to be selfish and spoiled. We had our first at 25 and as soon as I got pregnant I knew I wanted more more more. We have had one more and my hubby says no more. I want another in 5-6 years. So heres what we came up with . We wont do anything drastic like get snipped, and he is keeping an open mind, we will see where we stand then and decide then. As long as he knows what you want, give him time to think and let him know he has a couple years to really be sure. Good Luck

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